“Taotao-er please come here for a moment”

My nainai sounds weirdly calm. Did I do something wrong? Am I in trouble? Oh no...she found about the egg tarts missing!! Curse my sweet tooth. I walk into the kitchen looking as innocent possible. “What is it nainai? Is something wrong?”

“Nothing wrong Taotao-er...but here.”

She hands me an envelope that she was, I just realized, hiding behind her back. I thank her and grab the envelope gingerly when I notice the sender. I gasp.

Breathe in. Breathe out. I still could have been rejected. Think with a cool head, Zitao.

I slide my finger under the seal, ripping it successfully. Eep. I can’t do this. 

“Nainai you read it please! I can’t..my nerves are everywhere..what if I didn't...”

“Aish..you silly boy. I don't need to look at that letter. I know, we know, that you got in. But nonetheless, I will read it out loud so we can both hear it loud and clear:

Dear Zitao,

On behalf of the admissions committee, it is my pleasure to offer you admission...are you crying? 

“..no..” 

To say I was crying was an understatement. I was a blubbering mess. It’s just that overwhelming feeling when you work so hard after countless nights of not sleeping and after all those cram schools and after all those miserable stacks of books and dreaded piles of homework, it just pays off. It’s a feeling where you feel that great big burden getting of your chest and your shoulders and it’s just wow. I got into my dream school! I can not wait to tell my parents! I know they will be proud me. As their only child and son, I have expectations to succeed and uphold.

-------

After I calmed down a bit and had some tea and treated myself to more egg tarts, I asked “Nainai, you think mama and baba will be here tonight? I want to tell them the news personally.” 

She sighed sadly and shrugged her shoulders half-heartedly. I figured that they wouldn't be coming home...again. My parents are both entrepreneurs who own a construction company. It’s nothing fancy but what they do is supervise the workers and handle prospective projects that the clients request. Their business and reputation have been expanding due to my parent’s prowess as a team and giving solid results. I guess you can say they are both business magnates. 

Nevertheless, the fact that they won’t be coming home today doesn’t faze me. If they don't come today, they will come tomorrow! If not tomorrow than the next day! Need to have positive thoughts. No negativity. I will just wait for the right time.

“Don’t worry nainai. I will wait for whenever they come. There’s no rush after all.”

In the meantime, I'll do some yoga to ease my mind and nerves. And eat more food. 

--------

Nainai pretended not to hear that sad twinge of disappointment in his last sentence.

The old woman sighed into the night. After she gave her grandson a well-deserved bear hug and a goodnight kiss, she proceeded to go make tea for herself. For one, she hated these lonely nights, they were a constant reminder how lonely this house was. 

Today was a good day, she couldn’t complain. Her Tao-er got into his dream school. Not that she doubted him in the first place. Any university in their right mind would have accepted him. Tsinghua University was part of the C9 League which holds the oldest and most renowned universities in mainland China: Tsinghua University, Peking University, Harbin Institute of Technology, University of Science and Technology of China, Fudan University, Zhejiang University, Nanjing University, Shanghai Jiao Tong University and Xi'an Jiao Tong University. It is said that the C9 is parallel to that of the Ivy Leagues of the United States. 

The past 16 years have been filled with happiness with the arrival of her great pride and joy Huang Zitao. Ever since he was a child he was different. He turned out to be a gifted child. He was smart and liked to read a lot. No picture books for him! Zitao was reading at an advanced level by five years old. National Geographic was his favorite by far. So informative! he would like to say. He had a fascination with animals but no bugs. He absolutely hated/feared bugs, especially spiders. If he saw one, there would surely be waterworks following right after. He also excelled in his martial art classes. That child was flexible as a pretzel. He was also head of his class and technically in league with the big boys. As for toys, he really liked stuffed toys so that he can hug and snuggle and carry them everywhere. He had his favorite: Mr. Pinku Pinku.

Zitao’s parents being the busy people they are, prasie their souls, had barely adequate time to be with him. Her daughter, a strong-headed woman, bless her, worked hard to get the life she had, but at what cost? Sometimes she felt helpless that her daughter, mother of Zitao, was doing the wrong thing. Her daughter and son-in-law loved Zitao for sure but time restraints didn't allow them to be a constant presence in his life. That broke nainai’s heart. Nevertheless every time they came, they spoiled Zitao endless, because that baby can melt anyone with his eyes.

She contemplated for a while more. This house was far too big for only 4 people and with two of them gone constantly, even more so. Tao-er was a very shy kid and didn’t really like being in the spotlight in anything. He was independent and liked finding “solace in silence” as he once replied to her question as to why he didn’t bring friends over. 

But that wasn't the answer she was looking for.

There was his friend Chen, a friend he made while in elementary school. He was Zitao’s closest (and probably only) friend. After discovering Chen was a deaf-mute, Zitao was bent on learning sign language to communicate better with him. It was such a beautiful act of kindness on his part. But in the real world, kindness wasn’t going to make him branch out. He needed something else. A pull from his personal, closed bubble. 

Perhaps going to Tsinghua was the change he needed.