United States. August 2009.

"Okay, I'll think about it' I told my dad through Skype.

"Please do think about it, it's a great opportunity and you know it honey" he said.

I closed my eyes for a moment then replied "Yes I will dad, I'll call you when I've decided"

"I'll hear from you soon then, you take care and we miss you."

"Bye, I miss you too. Send my love to Chace and Aunty" I said before ending the call in my laptop.

I covered my face with the palm of my hands, going home? I asked myself. Can't think about it now, maybe later.

I decided to surf the internet since I have time to spare. I went to my regular k-pop websites, the band that I liked first was Bigbang, they're so funny and I like their songs too especially Lies and Haru Haru. I have heard of other bands but I didn't bother looking them up at first because like any other fan, I used to tell myself that it's an act of betrayal for Bigbang if I admire other bands from a different company. It's different now though, I mean I still love Bigbang but I have come to like another band, from another company, yeah, talk about eating your own words, guilty.

That band is TVXQ, actually, the main reason is it's because Kim Jaejoong is one of the band's members. I like Kim Jaejoong so now I like TVXQ too as a natural consequence. Yes I like him, I mean who doesn't?. It started back in 2008, I was so curious about why people are very giddy just talking about TVXQ, they kept on saying they look better in their song Mirotic, so I gave in to my curiosity and watched their music video. That's when I saw him, Kim Jaejoong, tall, white and handsome Kim Jaejoong, just what I was looking for in a guy, so automatically, I developed this huge crush on him. I became his fangirl. Then it just snowballed from there, I googled him and the more I read about him and saw how people describe how kind and talented he is, my admiration for him grew. I watched the shows he appeared in and I even watched videos where fans pair him with another celebrity. Ofcourse at first I was annoyed that he is linked to somebody, I had this irrational selfishness for him but I've made my peace with it, and I got over the my crazy crush for him and became a normal fan and I had to be realistic, there are plenty of women out to get him, he probably has a girlfriend now unknown to the public.

I started scrolling through the websites, I sighed. "Ofcourse" I said, it's no surprise to see that the TVXQ disbandment is still on the news, it's been circulating lately. It's sad and shocking to the world and to the band's fanclub: Cassiopeias, but what worries me the most is the fate of Junsu, Yoochun especially Jaejoong because they haven't got a big company on their back anymore and worse, they're going against it. My dislike for SM entertainment grew worse. So much articles either supporting or criticizing them about their lawsuit are being released. They're under a lot of pressure now and I haven't got any power to help the band, I want to comfort him but I can't see how I can. I feel like a useless fan, no, I am a useless fan indeed. Now, all I can do is to hope and pray that everything will be okay and to just continue being their fan. I wish they won't give up and that they'll always be strong.

I looked at the clock and see that it's already 6 pm, I turned my laptop off and decided to finally do some thinking.