Chapter 13 - Coffee

HER

I stood, in the lobby of a fancy café, waiting for the receptionist to confirm my reservation, and looked around in fascination. I hardly ever came to Gangnam, and had definitely never been anywhere this nice before.

And I’d never been anywhere that required ID check just for coffee either.

“Thank you miss Cheon,” said the girl, politely handing me back my ID, “if you’ll please follow me?”

I thought she was going to take me into the large, airy room where I could see people sitting and enjoying their drinks through the large arched doorway in front of us, but instead, she got out from behind her desk and led me to a door on the left that led to a small, dimly lit staircase. We climbed two flights of stairs as I wondered where we were going, and she stopped in front of a closed door with a sign that said “private”, motioning for me to go in.

“Please ring the bell if you need anything.” She said, before leaving back down the way we had come from.

I nodded uncertainly and pushed the door open. The room inside was similarly decorated as the one downstairs, though it was much smaller and held far fewer tables; and they were all empty except for the one near the large windows at the back.

‘I guess I wasn’t that far off when I thought he could buy me the whole restaurant…’ I thought in amazement, as it dawned on me that Minseok must have rented out this whole room for us just for privacy’s sake.

He must’ve heard the sound of the door open and close because he quickly stood up next to the table as I came in. My breath caught as I looked at him. Last time, he’d looked like a little boy, in his snapback and oversized sweats, but now he stood in front of me in dark pressed trousers and a white dress-shirt, with a few buttons undone at the top… and his hair had been slicked up and away from his forehead, giving him an air of y manliness that I’d never known him to have before.

“Aah, is this a bit much?” he said with an embarrassed grin as he rubbed the back of his neck. He must have noticed me staring. “Sorry,” he added, “we had a photoshoot before and I didn’t get changed…”

I tried not to look down at my own clothes. I’d done the best I could, with just 5 minutes’ notice, but my skinny jeans and red plaid shirt felt ridiculously inadequate in comparison with his quasi-formal attire.

“Of course not, you look fine!” I retorted, perhaps a bit too loudly, waving my hand in a dismissive gesture and feeling my face flush.

“And so do you.” he said, pulling up a chair and motioning for me to sit down, “I mean, more than fine. You look beautiful. Aahh… well, yes.”

I laughed at his nervousness and he gave me a gummy smile, sitting down too.

“Why is this so weird?” he asked, pulling a weird face, and I chuckled.

“I don’t know… it is weird, huh?” I leaned in, as if we were sharing a secret, and we laughed. It seemed to break the tension.

“I’m sorry I called so last-minute like this…” he apologized as I picked up the menu.

“Oh no, it’s ok, I didn’t have any plans anyways.” I replied, trying to sound casual.

Actually, I’d been really surprised when he’d called, maybe about 30 minutes earlier. First of all, we usually didn’t talk on the phone, and second, he’d just randomly asked me if I wanted to meet him for coffee. Right then. I’d been so shocked I thought he was joking, but apparently he wasn’t. His schedule had freed up and now he suddenly had a free 2-hour time slot in the afternoon, and he’d thought of me. He’d actually been embarrassed that he had so little time to meet, but actually, I was flattered, and a little bit relieved. I didn’t know if I could handle seeing him again for a longer period of time, so it seemed like a win-win situation. He’d given me the address of this place in Gangnam, and now, here I was. I hadn’t had time to dress up, or style my hair, or even think about how crazy it was that I was heading to a coffee date with Minseok after all these years.

HIM

“But this place…” she said glancing around the room in awe, “it’s a little overwhelming! Do you often come here?”

“Oh no, a friend recommended it to me.”

“I see…” she said, and we both fell quiet again, looking at the menu.

Well, she was looking at the menu, I was just looking at her. I really liked this “y casual Sunday” look she had going on, and even though I could tell she’d been embarrassed when she’d walked into the room, she looked absolutely breath-taking to me. I’d known schoolgirl-Sora, and she’d been cute and charming. And I’d seen teacher-Sora, who was sleek and polished. But the grown-up, casually beautiful woman who sat in front of me right now, seeming both nervous and confident at the same time, that was a Sora I definitely wanted to see more of.

“I think I’ll get a latte… and the raspberry cake!” she said, snapping the menu closed. “You?”

“Just an americano for me.” I smiled back at her.

“That’s it? You take me to this fancy place and you order a regular coffee?!” she laughed as if she couldn’t quite believe it.

“Well, it’s supposed to be really good coffee” I told her in a side whisper, making her laugh. She still looked at me like I was slightly crazy though.

“This place is a bit much, isn’t it?” I confessed, and she nodded, with a quiet chuckle.

“So…. This whole room is just for us?” she asked.

“Yup”

“You didn’t have to do that…” she said, looking down at her hands.

“Oh, but actually I did” I replied, rather sadly.

She looked up, asking the question with her eyes. ‘why?’

“How much do you know about EXO?” I asked her.

“Hmm… well, not much, to be honest… besides what you’ve told me… I know that you guys are really popular, and that at least 50% of the students at my school are in love with you…” she laughed.

“Yeah…” I said, chuckling with her and then getting more serious.

I wanted to explain about how insane my life was. About how starting a relationship with anyone was completely crazy. Not only because I had no free time, but because it would also put ridiculous demands on the other person’s sanity, and not to mention their safety. We’d have to skulk around and hide, and she would never be able to tell anyone who she was seeing. She wouldn’t be able to take me on double-dates with her friends, and we would never be able to do the “normal” things that other people did. I felt I should warn her. And yet, part of me wanted to pretend, just for a moment, that I was just a normal guy asking a girl out. I knew it was selfish, but I didn’t want to scare her away. I wanted her to be mine, and I didn’t care if it messed up my life, or anybody else’s in the process.

“Remember when we used to go to the park and daydream about what it’d be like once I got famous?”

Her eyes crinkled into a smile at the memory and she said “of course.”

“I thought I’d walk down the streets and people would call my name and ask me to sign autographs and take pictures with me,” I remembered fondly.

“And you’d get asked to come on all the talk shows… and have women throw their underwear at you on stage…” she went on.

“Yeah… hey!!” I snapped at her and she laughed. “It’s not like that, you know!” I blushed and she laughed more.

“Actually…” I said, becoming more serious, “it’s worse…”

Her smile fell and she looked at me, waiting for me to go on.

“All that stuff… just magnify it a thousand times.”

She looked at me questioningly.

“When I walk down the street with the other members, it’s not one person who’ll come ask for an autograph, it’s 100.”

Her eyes widened.

“And the longer we stay out, the bigger the crowd gets. People start following us… They call their friends… it gets to the point where we can’t really get anything done, and we have to call a car to come and take us away because people are pushing and shoving and shouting so much that it becomes as dangerous for them as it does for us.”

Her face fell and I wanted to stop.

“Our fans… they mean well but…” I let my sentence trail off and paused before continuing, “So this kind of place… well, it’s not because I’m trying to show off or anything” I said, pulling a small smile, “it’s because I can’t really go anywhere normal.” I finished rather sadly.

“Seokie…” she said, and reached for my hand in empathy.

I took a deep breath and shook myself slightly. “Well anyways, we should probably order!” I added with fake cheerfulness.

She nodded uncertainly and removed her hand from mine. I wished she hadn’t.

Then the waiter came in and took our order, which was delivered to us no more than 5 minutes later. After that, the conversation turned much lighter and we both reminisced about our high school days, carefully skirting around the issue of the breakup, and it was probably the best two hours I’d had in… well… a very long time.