Requested by: Loanalana

Kim Jiae was tempted to just grab the tiny shiny silver item in the kitchen. The thought of the sharp blade going through her wrist made her feel alive. But she had to resist, for now, especially when no one knew her dark secret. She scanned through the crowds that were chattering with each other about their lives and reminiscing their high school days.

One of her old classmate had made a school reunion at his house, gathering people who came from far and near. She didn’t know she would get invited; she used to be the quiet one who sat at the corner, like what she was doing now. No one seemed to care she was there or even strike a conversation with her. Her anxiety built up as she played around with the fork she was holding.

She stabbed the cake she slice on the plate lightly and mumbling words to calm her down. The chair beside her screeched and she looked at the person. “Hey” The person greeted, his arm was on her chair. The action brought her to discomfort. She wasn’t fond of guys to be near her, even if the guy’s arm was just on her chair.

“H-Hey” She stuttered, her head turned back to look at her cake. She grew nervous when she heard a chuckle from the guy. “Still the same, huh?” She nodded slowly, unsure why the guy was talking to her. “Listen, the guys made me to do a dare and it involves you” He whispered closely into her ear. She shivered, moving away from the guy.

He held her arm tightly before pulling her to the living room where most people were. Everyone seemed to cheer when they both came in. “Damn, I didn’t know you’re that brave to do this!” One of the guys shouted excitingly.

Suddenly the guy whispered to her again. “Just follow me” His arm slid around her waist and pulled her closer. He started to slow dance and Jiae felt her cheeks heated up. She felt throwing up and what made it worst was people were laughing at them.

The guy smirked and released her. “Gosh, she has no curves at all!” He spat out, gaining laughter around the room. “I can’t do this, she’s too stiff” He commented again, sending her disgusted looks.

“You lost the dare!”

“Whatever, just don’t make a dare on her again!”

Jiae didn’t hear anything after that as she ran away from the scene. She thought people would change for the better, but they were still the same. They were just going to insult her with painful words and wouldn’t give a damn.

She was about to get out from the place as she wiped her tears, but a hand took her arm and spun her around. Her eyes were red with her nose; she couldn’t bear listening to more hurtful words on her. She closed her eyes, waiting for the person to humiliate her.

Instead, a concern soft voice had woken her from her nightmare. She opened her eyelids, seeing the person who stole her heart during high school.

“Barom…” She mumbled, letting her hair covered her unappealing face. “Are you alright?” He asked. “I’m fine” She lied, her head looked down. Her heart felt like eighteen again, the way he had his worried tone at her made her feel safe. But she wasn’t eighteen anymore, and he was probably just asking without a tiny bit of concern.

“I gotta go” She said quickly, twisting the door knob roughly and drove off.

She sighed deeply as she entered her empty house. She took off her shoes, placing it slowly on the rack. She went into the bathroom after taking her delicate tiny blade with her. She sat on the bathtub and she turn on her shower.

She was wet, her tears mixed together with water from her shower. She slowly cut her arm and her head fell back, feeling the pain.

Blood flowed out from her arms and she stared at it dripping to the floor. The tiny blade came nearer on her wrist, the excitement getting near her veins made her feel better. She was ready to just leave the place, away from the horrible people.

The bathtub was almost full of water and she put her arm into it, resisting the pain she had made. Her head came into the water, drowning herself.

She didn’t remember when she started it, but she had the reasons to do them. After her parents had passed, she became a mess. Depression slapped on her face and no one knew. People in her school made fun of it for being a loner. Some tried to talk to her but they would always end it with insults about her.

She couldn’t trust anyone and she had no one to cry on. She was alone.

She would cry at night, in that empty house, begging to be killed by anything. She just wanted to end the horror nightmare.

The sharp blade pained her when she tried for the first time, but it was at least killing her slowly. Every cut meant every good damn reason to be dead.

The running water from the shower suddenly stopped and a pair of hands gripped tightly on her shoulders, dragging her weak body back on its feet. She coughed out some water from and let her hand place on the sink to balance herself. She was confused and angry at the same time, she was supposed to be dead by now.

But what shocked her was Barom was standing in front of her, wrapping a towel around her. The pain she made gradually disappearing.

“What the hell were you thinking?” Barom yelled, his hand slammed on the nearby wall. Jiae kept quiet, her eyes wandered around. “You could’ve died!” He continued, his arms were everywhere but his expression stayed the same; anger.

“I wanted to die” She murmured quietly, enough for Barom to hear. His arm fell on her shoulders. “This is wrong, Jiae” His eyes gaze into hers strongly.

“You shouldn’t be doing this” He half-yelled, making Jiae scared. She had never seen him like that. He was just the nice guy in school; she would never think there was a different side of him.

“Why are do you let them control you?” He asked. So he knew, Jiae thought.  “Why can’t you stand up for yourself?” He continued, his eyebrows furrowed in anger.

Jiae was terrified, her lips were shaking and she couldn’t reply him. He rubbed his temple and started to move around. It was a complete silence with only the sound of Barom’s footsteps. “I know you’re a strong person, Kim Jiae”

“I am not” She quickly answered, wiping her small tears that appear down her cheeks. Barom halted and stared at her. “You are, Jiae”

“You have to believe in yourself and ignore those comments from people” He advised, his voice was softer. “I can’t, okay!” She shouted, bursting her wall to not cry loudly in front of him. Her tears streaming down her pale face and she didn’t care if Barom would see her in disgust. It was building inside of her, those insecurities and loneliness. She had to let it out.

She had to show it to someone how miserable she was.

“I can’t deal with it, it’s too hard, Barom!” She cried out loud as she fell on her knees. Barom’s eyes softened and squatted down to her eye level. It hurt him to see the girl he loved looking so broken.

“Jiae, look at me”

She avoided his eyes as she focused at the floor. His hands made its way on her face and gently making her look at him. “I promise you that good thing will happen to you if you believe in yourself” He said, smiling slightly. Her heart was beating fast as Barom got closer to her.

“I believe in you, Jiae. And I care about you so much” He hugged the girl lovingly. Jiae breathe in the sweet scent of Barom and she felt intoxicated by it. “You’re not fighting it alone, I’ll help you” He pulled away, staring back into her eyes. “I’ll help you with everything, I’ll always be there for you from now on” He spoke warmly, fixing Jiae’s wet bangs to the side.

“Just promise me you won’t do this anymore” He said, taking her arm and scanning it with a heavy heart. She hesitated but Barom made her feel secure and convincing. “I promise” She muttered while Barom smiled.

“I’m sorry I was being a total douchebag shouting at you but I was worried sick for you and –” Jiae’s palm shut his mouth, her smile finally appear on her face. “Thanks for saving me”

He grabbed her arm and pulled it away from his lips. He smiled back, naturally led his arm around her tiny waist closer to him. “It’s my job to do so, princess” His playful smile plastered on his face as Jiae slapped him lightly. The physical contact between her and him were comfortable and Jiae liked it.

“Can I ask something though?” Barom asked, his fingers playing with hers but his eyes fixed on her lips. She nodded, feeling happy after a very long time.

“May I kiss you?” Her head shot up, seeing Barom’s blushing face. “You may not” She cheekily answered, as she stood up and held the doorknob. Barom was surprised and embarrassed; he could barely look at her face now.

He quickly stood up after she did, clearing his throat. “Well, um…” He heard Jiae’s chuckle and her hand held his arm. “You’re such a cutie” She said, pulling him towards her and sealing his lips with hers. Their lips moved in sync and pulled away slowly.

“I would never think our first kiss would be in the bathroom” She said, after calming her speedy heart. “So you actually thought where would our first kiss be?” Barom asked, wriggling his eyebrows. She gulped, her eyes widened, finally realizing what she just blurted out.

“Now you’re the cutie” He chuckled, grabbing her hand immediately and kiss her again before she would argue back.

I hope you liked it!

P/S I really hope all of you who reads this are in a healthy life, if you are not fine, please, talk to people (your family, friends etc etc) because there will someone who cares about you really deeply. They may not show it but they do care and hurting yourself will hurt them too.

Take care of yourself, dear readers! xx