*** Bjoo

Hansol was weird there. I wonder what's wrong. Is it because he's home ? I should've held him back then, so he wouldn't have got hurt or something. Maybe it's just because of me. I mean we've run away from there and he left Jiho without talking and all... Even if he's an they're best friends, maybe i shouldn't have done something like this. I'm now going back home. On my way to work i got caught by Dongsung and his buddies. It still hurts, i guess i have more than bruises this time... I don't care. While wlaking i hear Hojoon's voice not far. I recognize the voice because he's tortured me a lot, only with words. I can see where he is. I see clearly what's happening there. Dongsung's sitting onthe ground. Hojoon's looking at Jiho doing something mean to a young man (maybe two years younger than us). I can't stand what i see, the poor thing's going to remember it for his whole life, it's awful and i know that feel. I just walk toward them, i'm going to shout when someone grabs my wrist. I turn around and see Hansol, crying.

*** Hansol

I heard them, passing by my house. I was curious so i followed them. I saw Byung joo looking at the scene and walking toward them. Was he with them ? I don't know, but inside of me, there's something that just broke, it hurts. Why do i always end up crying in front of Byung joo ? And why is he always around ?

*** Bjoo

-Hey Hansol if you don't let me go this guy there's going to...

-So you're not with them ?

-Me ? With them ? You're kidding !

Something's wrong with him.

-Hansol i'm sorry, wait for me, this kid needs help...

He lets me go and i'm just going there the fastest i can. After pushing Jiho away i help the kid getting up and he runs away with all his strength. I'm now in trouble... Hojoon and Dongsung, angry at me at the same place, maybe i'm going to die before helping Hansol. I'm stupid.

-Look who's here... i missed you Joo-ya.

-Then you're the only one, Dongsung.

-Come on... don't you love me ?

-It's in the past, it doesn't even hurt me anymore.

-You're such a heartless person...

-Well maybe... but the worst are here right ? You, who's trying to throw his bad luck, his darkness on others, Hojoon who's acting all nice and likes to play with others and break them until they can't take it, and the tool right here, who's doing anything like a good dog who's been trained to kill others. I really thought you had feelings guys, but it seems like you're just all rotten to the bone. Go ahead, hit me, break me, but apologise to Hansol who didn't do anything here.

-You're funny... well i'm not in the mood of fighting anymore. Just go.

Tch, coward. But i'm happy i don't have to get hit more. I just go back to where Hansol was, but he's not here anymore. Where's he ? Did he go home ? Why ? Does he hate me ? I go to the convenience store and find the guy i saved with Hansol. Do they know each other ? I just stay away and listen.

-So the guy, the one who saved you... he wasn't with them, he arrived after.

-Yay. Thanks to him i'm alive, i guess...

Hansol's doubting me. Of course he is ! His best friend was a fake person, he's alone, maybe more than i am ! I hide behind someone and just go away. I want to help him but it only feels like i'm going to hurt him more. I don't want things get worse for him. Thanks to him i started to see the light in this hell... but what will happen if he can't smile anymore ? It'll be meaningless right ? I don't know. Finally i turn around and walk to them.

-Hey are you okay ?

-Oh ! Yay thank you... really... i thought...

-I know.

His eyes are surprised and thankful. This kid is just full of innocence, i feel even more angry at the others to crush people like him. He leaves and thanks me again. I just smile at him and then look at Hansol. He seems troubled, i don't want to confuse him even more...

-Well let me just say i'm not with them so if you need me... i can feel you don't want to talk about it so...

-You're right... i just need time to think, let's just talk about it at school.

He gets up and leaves. Why do i feel so upset ? I don't know... well time to go home and sleep already.

*** Hansol

It's Thursday, Byung joo's not here. He just played with me like the others... Sangwon and Sangkyun are the only friends i really have. I shouldn't have hoped for Byung joo to get more sociable or friendly... I'm hurt but i don't know why anymore. Well i don't care if he's not here ! It's not like i had something to tell him, or anything. Sangwon and Sangkyun are torturing me... During lunch...

-I haven't seen Byung joo at the cafe and all...

-Did he move without saying anything like when... ?

No i can't think about anything else ! After school they ask me if i want to go with them to check... i'm afraid. What if he's gone ? What if he just doesn't want to see me ? But i want to go there, to know, or maybe to get answers. I'm lying, i just want to see him. Because he said he wasn't with them, and like a fool i want to believe whatever he says. I'm so stupid, i'm afraid of my own stupidity. Finaly i give up and follow them to Byung joo's place. Sangwon knocks, once, twice, no answer. Sangkyun is now harrassing the doorbell but still nothing. He's gone, he must be. We raised his hopes and it was too painful so so he left, or maybe he hates me, or us ? No just me right ? Why am i thinking this way ? It only hurts and it doesn't make any sense. I can see Sangwon's face become sad.

-Wait... says Sangkyun, the door's open.

We just come in, without saying anything. We start to look for anhy signs of left or just for him. I suddenly walk and something and i can hear a growl. It surprises me, but i'm more shocked when i see Byung joo lying on the ground, his eyes staring at the ceiling. I look closer at him and i can see bruises on his wrists, neck or lips and he's bleeding. What happened here ? Before Sangkyun can call an ambulance someone rushes in the house.

-So you dares calling people ? Stupid kid.

I can see a scary man, holding a broken bottle of glass. His eyes are full of hatred, he only sees Byung joo, the reason of his madness, i guess.

-Mr Kim please let him be ! Sangwon begs him.

-Oh it's you...

He just pushes Sangwon away, Sangkyun runs to him and see if he's hurt. He walks towards Byung joo and me.

-You... i don't know you... get out of the way.

-No.

-Sorry ?

-If i do that you'll kill him...

-Of course ! I should have done it earlier ! Now move !

-No.

-Hansol...

I turn around, i can see his sad look, his scared look. I can't leave him, he's going to die if i do. Sangwon runs out of the appartment. What is he doing ? Oh yay i understand, i think. I try to find all the courage i have and face that upset man.

-If you don't move i'll crush you...

-Surprise attack dirty Byung joo punk !

Dongsung comes in and i think the scene gives him a shock.

-Mr Kim ? Why are you here ?

-Well as you can see i'm visiting my son... but this kid won't let me see him.

I don't know why but i can also see fear in Dongsung's eyes. Wait... This man is Byung joo's father ? Why is he trying to kill him ? I just don't understand. Thanks to Dongsung (woaa i've never thought i would say this once in my life) i hadn't had to gain time and Sangwon arrives with a policeman and ambulance. They take Byung joo away and i'm kind of left alone in the room. I look at the broken table, the blood on the floor and it makes me want to cry. Why is my life getting worse and worse ? What did i do ? And Byung joo ? Did he asked all these things to happen ? I don't think so.

I suddenly hear someone sitting beside me. I look at the person and i can see Dongsung, with a broken look in the eyes. I'm starting to wonder if he's not Hojoon toy...

-You know... when he left i felt abandonned... and Hojoon gave me a hand so i took it but i didn't know he would ask me to pay my debts back... You know i don't think Jiho's a bad person, it's just Hojoon, and maybe me... I didn't notice i was hurting him before, and when i realised i was too much into it. Now bullying is my only way to get to talk to him you know... i know it's creepy and all but i don't know how to get out of this...

-I didn't know you were hurt that deep...

-I love Byung joo, but when he told me... i just ran away, i was afraid of loosing him and i ended up loosing him anyway, in the worst way. The old him is dead and it's a bit of my fault. What we saw that night... i don't think he'll be able to forget, like i won't. I wanted to crush you because you seemed interested in him, so i cae back to Hojoon...

-And it was the worst thing you could have done, for him, for us, and for you.

We look up and see Sangkyun talking.

-I already know all this... i'm just looking for a way to get out of hell and maybe get everyone's forgiveness.

-Well it won't be easy, you've been really awful to people, actually i don't think i'll ever forgive you.

-It will be hard for me too, since i've only known your bad sides... i say, a bit hesitant.

-I'm not asking you guys... All i want is...

Byung joo. Of course, i can see how desperate he is now. How come i didn't notice before ? Maybe because i was too busy looking at my broken crush, his problems and my own. Now i just don't who needs to be saved... Donsung ? Jiho ? Byungjoo ? Me ? Everyone ? It's so messy in my head... I just don't understand why life is so hard, so cruel... i really want an answer, to find a way to smile freely, to hug the people i love and to hope my dreams come true. I want to scream but i don't know why anymore... No there is actually something i have to do...

I leave the appartment without saying anything and just go to a house in the neighborhood, i just noticed those two leave really near each other and they seem to hate one another. I knock on the house's door and someone goes out, Jiho, as i was expecting. He's looking down on me and i just give him a mad look. He seems surprised.

-What do you want ?

-Explanations.

-About ?

-About you.

-Me ? There's nothing to say you know... it's kinda obvious now.

-Yay then why do you like Hojoon ?

-And why do you like Byungjoo ?

-It's just not the same !

-Huh ? One's hurting people and the other is... hurting people ?

-It's not the same !

-You already said this...

-Hojoon likes to hurt people, Byungjoo doesn't want to...

-But he still hurt them, because he doesn't know how to act around others.

-He's just like you, or Dongsung, and even Hojoon i'm sure, he needs help ! He needs friends.

-I don't want to hear your pity speech you know, i've had enough... always listening to your boring words about loneliness and friendship...

-What Hojoon did to you ?

-It's none of your business...

-I don't understand how you can be like this just to gain his affection...

-What would you do if you were me ? If it was the only thing to do in order to get close to the one you love ?

-It's not my case...

-That's why you don't understand... now just leave. I'll just say that, yay, Hojoon kind of forced Dongsung to do all this, like he used me to hurt you and Byung joo. Why he did this ? I don't know...

He leaves here and slams the door. Now i'm confused, i don't know what to think and what to do. I should go back and see Byungjoo's state but i want to clear this up... i'm really tired too, i guess i'll just do everything tomorrow. I'm really worried but i just can't go there. First, because there's Dongsung, and then because i didn't talk to him since the thing that happened with that kid. Now that i think about it, it always seemed like Dongsung was behind every single bad thing that happened but it's more like everything that includes him is because of Hojoon. Why ? Right, i just don't know why he is doing all this. Does he just like to hurt people ? Or maybe he's taking revenge on life in his own way, it's possible.

I'm goign back and when i come home my sister almost jumps on me.

-Hansol ! Bro !

-Woooaaa you're sick ?

-No tomorrow i'd like you to take me to your school so i can see your classmate, Byungjoo.

-I won't.

-Why ?

-Because, you like him, i like him and the thing is he's probably still in love with an awful guy that bullied me at school.

After saying this i just go to my room, lock the door and scream on my bed. I think i just dig my own grave... Well i should sleep because tomorrow i'm going to die.

A/N sorry for the short and late update, i'll do my best for the next chapter so you won't hate me. As always thanks for reading and also thanks to the subscribers (i love you guys!!) and see you :3

hope you enjoyed and, yay comment if you have the mood x3