Four

Minwoo noticed how Eric did not even look at him. He was sitting on the couch in his apartment, but he wasn’t really present. The leader had come there, said couple of words and then fallen into this dozed off mode, where he just stared at his hands and said nothing. Minwoo didn’t know what had happened, but he had a hunch that it had something to do with Dongwan.

“Eric.” He said.

The leader sneered, and felt the side of the couch weighing as the younger guy sat down. Minwoo took the hands into his and rubbed them softly, sensing how Eric wanted to answer the affection. Their eyes met, and in a fraction of a second Eric had pulled the smaller guy into his arms and hugged him tightly and longingly. Minwoo put his arms around him and nuzzled his nose on his neck, while he inhaled the scent on the skin.

“I love you so much.” He murmured.

“I know.” Eric whispered. “I…I know. I love you too.” He hid his mouth to the crook on the neck and closed his eyes as the moment from earlier came into his mind.

Flashback:

Eric entered his apartment and threw the bag to the floor, kicked off his shoes and took off his jacket and walked to the living room. He sat down to the couch when suddenly the lights switched on and he turned his head at the switch.

“Hi, Eric.” Dongwan greeted.

“What are you doing in here!?” Eric yelled.

“I came to talk.” The younger guy replied calmly. “But this time…let me talk. I want you to listen.”

Eric reluctantly stayed on the couch, when Dongwan sat down and looked around as if trying to find Gomdori somewhere. But Eric just stared at him, like he could murder with his eyes. Dongwan then turned his head at him and his lips.

“Eric,” he began. “I am in love with Minwoo.”

The leader’s heart skipped a beat as the man just spilled it out like that and the eyes had changed the feeling. Dongwan was determined, and though his heart was beating rapidly and he was afraid of the eyes, he still felt balanced. Eric stood up from the sofa and looked down at the man, like he would strangle him there and then.

“What!?” He yelled.

“You heard me.” Dongwan mumbled. “I love Lee Minwoo!”

Eric gritted his teeth, clenching his fists, when Dongwan stood up, and ogled at him seriously. One more word, Eric thought, and I would hit. Dongwan leered at him and eventually, the sad eyes and the soft pout made him lower his hands.

“And that is why you him?” Eric interrogated.

“No! I realised it…after I had left…later!” Dongwan explained. “I…I want to love him, Eric.”

The leader snorted. “Do you understand…that what you did…is not worth anyone’s love?” He snapped. “You him! He hates you! He cannot stand the sight of you! He would not deserve a treatment like what you showed to him!” Eric yelled. “Would you endure what you did to Minwoo?”

Dongwan’s gaze lowered down to his feet.

“Would you be able to live after someone touched you like you did?” Eric questioned. “Would you be able to look at the man the same way anymore?”

“I…”

Eric scoffed and snorted again, as he lifted the guy’s face up by the chin and pierced his eyes through Dongwan’s. The guy tried to close them, but couldn’t as he wanted to suffer from the murderous gazing. Eric pressed the jawline hard.

“Eric,” Dongwan exhaled. “I…I know he won’t love me…and what I did is stupid and wrong…but I love him.”

“Dongwan, you don’t seem to realise how wrongly you’ve done. No one falls in love after doing something so horrendous to someone.” Eric muttered. “You don’t understand how bad it was that you touched Minwoo.” He was now tearing up.

“I do.” Dongwan nodded. “I do understand.”

Eric shook his head. “That is the problem. You don’t. You don’t see what Minwoo sees. You don’t hurt like he does. Dongwan, you weren’t treated like he was. You let us all down. You…broke something we used to have. You broke many things that we could not perceive. I can’t believe I loved you once.” He bowed his head down.

Dongwan widened his eyes.

“W-what?”

Eric suddenly realised and his head rose up promptly. And silence descended around the living room. Eric’s hands were now on Dongwan’s shoulders as their eyes met. The younger guy was mouth open, as the look on Eric’s face was pure shock. His lips were quivering and the anger he had felt and put to his words was now gone. Instead, Eric’s eyes showed panic and terrify.

Dongwan was speechless and abruptly his heart was beating really fast; faster than before. Eric gulped.

The silence was excruciating.

The stares were indescribable.

And the moment was too perfect.

“Maybe it’s better if you leave.” Eric muttered and pushed Dongwan out from the room.

Dongwan nodded and obediently exited the apartment, and closed the door after, not even glimpsing at the man, or biding a goodbye. When the door closed, Eric heaved a sigh and gulped again, before he grabbed his phone and called to Minwoo.

End of the flashback

Eric squished Minwoo in his arms and shook the memory out of his brain. The younger man felt the prompt heartbeat against his chest, and that brought a smile onto his face. Eric smelled the lotion Minwoo always applied to his skin and absorbed the warmth from his body. He tried not to reminisce upon the look on Dongwan’s face as he had confessed he had once been in love with him.

“Eric,” Minwoo sighed. “I love you so much. I will not let you go…I will not leave…and I will not un-love you. I am yours forever and ever.” He mumbled.

The older man pulled his head off and cupped the blushing and teary face at his, as their lips touched and Minwoo moved even closer.

“I will not let you go without a fight.” Eric said against the swollen lips. “I will fight if I have to.”