From then on I spent much time with Hae since my Parents was still looking for a donor although we are now always together but we didn’t talked that much I ‘m so shy at all and I don’t know what we will be talking about,

 

And because of the help of my friends who visit Hae we talk little by little and I started to talk to hae and I was surprised that what he likes I like too, music, food, artist, even strawberry he likes it too

 

So everyday we became closed like we used to be like when we are young since my parents was still looking for the donor Hae was doing chemo so the cancer wont spread in his body system

 

I accompany him and I was shocked that this chemo makes him suffered more

 

After the chemo he was vomiting every hour I assist him when he was vomiting and to my shocked he asked me to go away because he was shy and he feel that he was a burden to me

 

I didn’t know that my little brother was so scared of me I mean not scared that I would hurt him but scared that he will be a problem to me as I was watching him I can’t help but feel to sorry for him

 

But I’m so amazed that despite that he was suffering from his illness he has the strength to smile like now, he was watching cartoon Spongebob and he was laughing like he was okay and nothing was wrong with him

 

And I feel that I was smiling too if I see him happy, sometimes we play cards, and the punishment we draw or write anything who will lose in the game

 

And so even if I’m very good at playing cards I let him win because seeing him so happy with this simple games I know that I can be a good Hyung to him

 

Then one night after we play cards and watch cartoon I never thought that with those simple words it made me cry so much that I can’t breath

 

I was fixing his bed so he can sleep and rest well then I was wondering why he was still smiling and the way he looked at me I felt annoyed but not irritated

 

“Hae why are looking at me like that and why you are still smiling the cartoon ends and I hope that there’s nothing funny at my face!” I asked

 

“no Hyung there’s nothing funny at your face, actually I love your face Hyung!” he said and his face never changed he was still smiling like an idiot but I like it since he was cute in that way

 

 

“hmmm your lying, come on why are you smiling like that can you share it with me!” I asked again

 

Then he stares at the ceiling but still smiling

 

“I’m just so happy Hyung, I’ve never been so happy and thanks to you I’m smiling and feel I was still alive,

 

You know Hyung, spending time with you are the happiest day in my entire life, because Hyung you are the only person I love the most in the whole world, and I’m so happy because I have you as my Brother that’s why I’m smiling Hyung it is because of you so thank you so much Hyung and you let me be closed to you!,  good night Hyung” he said and he closed his eyes and fell asleep

 

I was shocked after I knew behind that smile he always show to me,

 

I get out of his room because I can’t cry in front of him I never realized that because of those words it made me so special and I don’t know what will I feel

 

And as I was crying I just felt someone was hugging me and it was Teukie Hyung and I heard everyone was there and asking me why I was crying

 

I never cry in front of them not until I knew that my little brother was sick and from then on I was a crying baby and I can’t hide my emotion from them.

 

Because of that I try to be more caring to my little brother and I never thought we will became much closer,

 

and months have passed Hae’s condition are doing well after the bone marrow transplant 

 

Because after waiting for so long at last my parents found a donor and then miracle happen, Hae was doing fine and the doctor said that the operation was successful

 

I’ve never been so happy in my entire life and I also never thought that the long existence of my little brother will bring so much joy in my heart

 

At last we go home and celebrate life and since I want to take care of Hae now I decided to share room with him so I can watch him 24/7 and Hae was so happy and even jump to his bed like a 5 year old kid

 

And I find him so cute and so adorable our first night in our room was blast since Heechul Hyung and other was decided to sleepover and it made Hae so much happy

 

We play cards, and enjoy the night but not so long since Hae cant stayed awake because It might be bad for his health since he was still healing

 

It was past 3am i just got out of our bathroom when I see someone who was still awake and when I try to look closely to that person I was surprised to see it was Hae and he was watching my friends sleeping

 

“Hae!” I called and even if I didn’t see clearly his face I know he was shocked that I saw him

 

“Hyung!” he said in shocked maybe he didn’t see me when I go to the bathroom

 

“hey why are still not sleeping you know it’s bad for you to sleep late ” I said then I sit to his bed and asked him with concern but what concern me why is he still awake?

 

“are you okay? Is there something wrong? are you hurt? Come on tell me and Hyung will do anything for my Hae” I said and smile at him

 

“thanks Hyung Hyukkie, I’m okay don’t worry its just I’m so happy because for the first time I was surrounded with people like them and I have friends now Hyung and seeing them sleeping in my room I can’t help but to feel happy so I can’t sleep maybe because I was so overwhelm with their care for me” he said and base on his tone I know he was about to cry but he was just shy because I was next to him

 

“Hae your so kind pure hearted, and joyful person that’s why more people love and care for you like me I care for you because besides that I’m your Hyung well you’re just too adorable that no one can’t resist even me.”

 

Then he hug me and again I was surprised because hugging Hae was really weird for me but in a good way it’s so warm and I felt I’m so happy when he hug me like this

 

“thank you Hyung Hyukkie, your really the best hyung in the whole world thank you!” he said and I felt the tears in my shoulder as he hug me so tight