Six weeks, I’ve been alone. Forty-two days have been filled with sadness, loneliness, and heartache. Sleeping is something I can’t do alone anymore. If I sleep it’s because my body literally shuts down in exhaustion. Climbing into a bed where Sehun used to lay scares me, because I know when I open my eyes, his handsome face won’t be there to greet me. Living alone leaves me with the demons of suicide and depression.

                It’s been weeks since I’ve eaten a solid meal. I had hopes that if I didn’t eat, eventually my body would shut down and I would be on my way to being back together with my fiancé, but so far it hasn’t worked. All I have to show for that is a loss of ten pounds. My coworkers say I look sick, but they completely understand why. I moved to New York to save Sehun’s life, but in the end I couldn’t save him. He’s gone forever.

                My daily routine has become simple. I wake up, shower, work until eight in the evening, and go home to sit in my living room alone. Phone calls have been flooding my cell phone and home phone, and the emails seem to be piling up. I haven’t talked to a single person, with the exception of my patients and coworkers, since the day I watched dirt cover Sehun’s casket. My mother and father are threating to come back to New York and get me, but I know they can’t afford a flight here unless I give them the money to do that.

                I had decided last week that today would be the day I take my own life. Over the last couple days, I’ve contemplated on how it was I would join Sehun. Dying slowly and painfully seemed to be fair because that was the way my fiancé lost his life. Some rope sat on the center of my bed for when I get home from work. The vaulted ceiling of my bedroom was strong enough to support my body weight, which means hanging from a rope would be no problem. Sehun, soon enough we will be together again…

                Work was the same as it’s ever been; surgeries all day, and checking on my patients at night. After completing three successful operations, and reading multiple charts hanging from hospital beds, I decided it was time to go home. I made sure every single patient I had was completely healthy enough to have their doctor changed. This was going to be the last time I took care of them. As I walked out the front doors of the hospital, I thought I heard someone shouting my name. I ignored it because no one dares talk to the depressed doctor anymore.

“Park Chanyeol,” the voice screamed running to me.

“B-Baekhyun? What the hell are you doing here?”

“What the hell am I doing here?! What the is wrong with you,” he screamed shaking me. “Do you know I have been worried sick because you don’t answer a single call or message I send to you?! I thought you’ve killed yourself without even saying goodbye to me!”

                There was vein gently forming down the center of his forehead revealing the true anger inside his body. My mouth couldn’t form an answer, so instead I observed how much he has changed within the past few weeks. He, just like me, was probably ten pounds lighter and bruised all over his arms. To me it looked like he had gotten into a fight a few days ago, because blotches of black and blue spread all over the tops of his arms. My guess was he and Jongdae got into another fight before he came here. Baekhyun pushed me in frustration so many times that I ended up backing up against a column. He was going to hit me again, but I wrapped my arms around him tight into a hug. His face was buried into my lab jacket, but I could still hear his voice.

“I honestly thought you were dead, Yeol. My heart was breaking at the thought of losing you forever…”

“I feel dead,” I answered honestly. “I don’t want to be on this earth anymore if it means having to be alone.”

“You’re not alone… You’re never alone. I am always here for you and you know that.”

                Since the day Baekhyun and I met in the record shop, he has been with me through thick and thin. He was been there for me through the struggles of medical school, and the heart aches of being turned down by so many hospitals before landing a real job. If it weren’t for the man standing in my arms, I would have given up on the passion of becoming a doctor. I would have never been able to save all the lives I have, and in turn would have never met Sehun. Maybe I should take this as a sign or something.

                Baekhyun pulled away from me looking up at me with innocent eyes. For seven years I looked into these eyes and loved the man who possessed them. I have looked into these brown eyes when we’ve kissed, made love, and cried together. In comparison to Sehun, Baekhyun has stood by my side through far more yet never left me for even a moment. I was the one that ran away from him even though my heart still wanted to love him. Suppressing my love for Baekhyun was easy when Sehun was here, but now that he’s gone, I can see the future I gave up four years ago.

                My heart needs healing, and my soul needs someone to have by my side, but my mind is telling me how selfish I am. I don’t deserve to be with Baekhyun, or with anyone for that matter. Sehun hasn’t been gone for that long, yet I need someone to help me live. I am completely alone…

“If you’re always here for me, then save me Baek. Save me from myself because honestly I want to die. I gave my everything to Sehun, and now I have nothing to show. He’s gone…”

                Baekhyun wiped the tears that fell from my eyes and sympathetically stared at me before stepping a little closer to me. He stood up on his tiptoes and placed his hands against my shoulders for support. As gentle as he could possibly be, Baekhyun pressed his lips against mine, letting them touch for several seconds. Then he kissed the side of my mouth and then my cheeks all the way up to my ear. The light air of his breath tickled me as he spoke.

“My purpose on this earth is to love you and save you. I may have let you go easily, but I’m not doing that again. I’m going to fight for you Park Chanyeol. I am going to stay by your side until I can’t anymore.”

“Save me then.”

                As if he had planned for me to say this, Baekhyun took hold of my hand and brought me towards a taxi cab waiting at the bottom of the stairs. The driver may have looked a little on the angry side that he was sitting for so long, but he still showed respect as I climbed into the back seat with Baekhyun. We drove for about a half hour until we made into Greenwich Village. People walked happily, hand in hand or in groups enjoying their night. The warm lights from the street lamps lit up the beautiful cobble stone streets until we stopped in front of a three floored building. It was made of red brick that was slowly being covered in a single bright green vine climbing up the sides. Baekhyun paid the cab driver and pulled me up to the grey steps. He ran to the door and unlocked it pushing it wide open revealing the empty hallway. I didn’t move confused at what was going on.

“Welcome home Chanyeol,” he said shyly biting his lip.

“I don’t live here. This isn’t my home.”

“I know it’s not. This is my new home, and I got you a room too. Look I know how hard it is for you to live in your apartment. You probably still have Sehun’s clothes in the hamper and closet, and the pictures all around the house. You’ll never heal if you live like that.”

“So what are you saying,” I sighed.

“Move in with me. I’m not asking for you to date me or jump back to where we left off, but as friends. Please live here with me. I don’t speak the language or know how New York works. Save me while I save you.”

                For the first time in six weeks, I smiled. My mouth formed the shaped of smile that I had completely forgotten how it felt. I walked to Baekhyun and ruffled the top of his hair.

“Fine, but I’m going to need you to help me move all our things out… I mean Sehun and my things.”

“Deal.”

                The following morning, I called out of work to help get my apartment cleared out. Baekhyun and I dressed comfortably and jumped on a subway to the Upper East Side. He was so happy observing the fast paced life of New York, but also still disturbed at how dirty the subway itself was. In time, he’ll learn to ignore that like the rest of us do. We entered by apartment and was greeted by photos and items that all belonged to Sehun. I could see the pain of Baekhyun as he stared at a photo of his best friend.

“You take care of your things, and I’ll take care of Sehun’s,” he said removing several photos off the table.

                I headed towards my closet to pack all of my clothes into boxes that Baekhyun had brought with us. All I needed were my clothes, and maybe some furniture since Baek’s new home, or our new home, was empty. He went to Sehun’s side of the closet and instantly removed all the clothes off their hanger. I would have sat and reminisced on the clothes, but leave it to Baekhyun to rip off that band aid and do it for me. After packing the clothes, he moved to the bed seeing the noose all tied up and waiting for its chance to be used. I pretended to not see him, but I saw Baekhyun break down in tears seeing how close he was to losing me forever.

                Within seven hours, the whole house was packed up. I would be leaving with only two things that belonged to Sehun, which was his favorite leather jacket and a photo from the day we moved to New York. Baekhyun turned to look at the empty place one more time, and shut the door behind us. He wrapped his arms around my neck and kissed me softly. It may seem unfair to me now, how I can just move out like this and try and leave Sehun in only my memory, but I know I need to move on. Even if that means finding new love, or in this case familiar love, I have to recover.

                Sehun will always be the love of my life, but that doesn’t mean to never love again. That goes for anyone really. Just because one door closes, does not mean there isn't another one open somewhere else. He told me himself that it’s okay if I find someone, that’s what he wanted me to do. I promised. I can make it without Sehun by my side. Baekhyun and I may have a long road ahead of us, but we can do it. These past few weeks, I’ve lost myself, but he knew where to find me. I’ve forgotten about who I was, but he’s reminded me. Byun Baekhyun will save me from myself and my clouded mind, because without him things go hazy.

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Sorry for the late update. Had issues turning on my 1900's laptop just so I could post.

However, thank you for reading Hazy, I truely appreciate it. This is the end of my Misconceptions series! For all the readers who began with Misconceptions and hated me for breaking up Baekyeol, here you xP In the end my OTP is always Baekyeol, even though Chanhun is very VERY close behind. I am sorry for killing Sehun too LOL. Thank you again <3