“Oh, Yifan!” A tall blond woman said, successfully drawing his attention.

“Emma!” He replied, happy to see her. She was a former colleague from the time when he worked in his mother's beauty institute in Vancouver, and she was the one who introduced him to a few modeling jobs. She was a good friend, but he had lost contact with her over the past two years. They were starting to catch up with each other but his mother finally showed up for her promised lunch with Yifan. He was a bit reluctant to leave, but Emma waved him away, making him promise to meet her on the evening because she was going out for a drink with some of the models Yifan used to work with.

His long call with his girlfriend made him park late that night, so he rushed his pace to reach the bar where the others were already drinking. Recognizing most of the faces when he pushed the door, he smiled, waves of warmth spreading in his chest and replacing the uncomfortable tightness he had been feeling there the whole past week. Drinking sounded like the best idea to clear his thoughts, so he let himself be drowned in the laughter and the fuzzy ambiance.

It was not Tao's fault, not really, he thought as his eyes lingered on the exposed collarbones of one of the male models present. Yifan himself was not sure what all of this meant, this being his eyes starting to notice the hard angles and toned planes of some men, and he was confused beyond anything. The ualization of Tao was not the problem in itself, he had rationalized, but accepting it affected him was. He had never been so directly exposed to the ualization of the male body, even with the few modeling jobs he had. The clothes wore you in such moment, not the other way around, models were the final touch and clothes were the main pieces. Also photoshoots were neither the place nor the time to admire the different body shapes and frames, so this was new-found territory and he was not sure he was willing to explore it. Not only because it shattered all his beliefs on his own uality, but because he was afraid of what he might discover. Admitting that he could start to understand the beauty behind the shoulder line of both gender was scary. Somehow it felt hazardous, but oh so tempting, and curiosity kept guiding his dark orbs towards the flex of muscles under the loose tank top of one of the unknown faces present.

It was well into the night when they had finally parted, most had come by car, but others had to call cabs to get back home. “I'm driving towards Shaughnessy, if anyone live on the way” He had offered, relaxed and happy by the ambiance. It had been a harmless offer, but now he regretted it, for he was stuck in his car with the one guy he had been looking at all night long. He felt uncomfortable, and the silence only added to the awkwardness of the air. It felt like he was back to his teenage years when he was all nervous and on a first date with a girl. Except this time it was a he, and Yifan was no longer 15, and this was definitely no date. The guy, Jared, had tried to make small talk, but his own answers had been short and clipped, and he had refrained himself from taking too much glances in the model's direction. He had Tan-Mi, he loved her! So why did it feel so weird to drop off some guy he barely knew?

“It's the street right after this corner.” Jared eventually said, and Yifan felt relief wash over his body. Soon, he put the car to a stop, letting the guy out after a brief goodbye. He watched him walk towards his apartment bloc for a moment before turning back to the road and his own thought. In the process, his eyes caught a bright green wallet on the floor of the passenger seat and he quickly looked up to the guy's retreating figure. He turned off the ignition and rushed out of his car to catch up with him. “Hey! Jared! You forgot your wallet!”

“Here.” Yifan handed him the bright material when they met halfway down the path.

“Ah, hmm, thanks.... Sorry too, I've been nothing but an inconvenience today...” He was barely any shorter than him, but at this moment, Yifan could see him small and bashful.

“No problem, don't worry.” He replied, a small smile spreading his lips. “Just be careful next time.”

“Yeah, next time...” The other looked down, a second of silence passing before he reached for Yifan's shirt, grasping it softly between his fingers without tugging on it. “It's just. I, I saw you looking at me tonight.” He mumbled, then stepped closer and looked up to meet his eyes. The similarity of their height brought their faces too close for Yifan's sanity, but he could not move away, pinned down by the other's gaze and heart missing a beat before his mind was sent in a whirlwind of what ifs.

“Can I?” He asked softly, making the world resume its motion. Yifan could feel the other's breath on his lips, and it was clear what it was he was asking. It was a terrifying moment – he had already kissed guys, for bet when he was younger, or in a strange comforting way in his trainee days, or even Tao about a year before, but it had never felt so wrong, it had never messed up with his heartbeat so much or blanked his mind that way. But maybe it was a right kind of wrong.

He nodded slowly, his eyes sliding shut at the first press of lips on the corner of his mouth. A shiver traveled accross his whole body at the contact, and he let out a whimper, throat tightening as he let his face be cradled into a proper kiss. It was soft, chaste, with no tongue and Yifan relaxed, his arms encircling the other's waist as his heart stopped beating frantically against his chest. It was only when the other's hand came brushing under his shirt and over the skin of his hips, tongue asking for entrance, that Yifan panicked. He stepped backwards quickly, even more confused than before. He did not know what to think, what to feel. “Sorry, I...” He let out a shuddering breath, and finished his sentence in a “Dunno what I'm doing.” before he ran away.

*.*.*

When he landed in China two weeks later, he was drained, both mentally and physically. Admittedly, the flight had took its toll on him, but the main reason for his state and the fading smile of Tan-Mi when she noticed the dark circles under his troubled eyes was the confusion that had been reeling in his mind. Yifan gained confidence from the knowledge of who he was, he believed in what he did and in his ideals, he was someone who worked on closing the gap between his weaknesses and the projection he had of himself, and if he tried to be objective in his judgment, he believed he was pretty successful in being the kind of man he wanted to be. First, he had no complain about his physical appearance, second he was hard-working and dedicated, and most important, he liked his work. He would have no greater wish than to enjoy what he did in his daily life and work, if it were not for his desire for a sweet family and children. Maybe this was due to the difficult situation with his father, but he had swore to himself he would never hurt a woman like his father did. He would cherish and build a loving family, and he believed Tan-Mi was the right one for this lifelong plan. Meeting her had enhanced these desires, but he kept in his heart the baby names he had already come up with.

Finally seeing her after weeks, he pulled her in a tight embrace, the butterflies and the comfortable wave of feelings coming back. He was mostly straight, of that he was sure. The only telling conclusion his confused mind could rationalize was that somehow, he was appealed by certain lines and shapes that were very much male. When he eventually walk out of the airport that day, he decided to bury all of this behind him, so that he could bask in his most cherished dream.

“I missed you.” He said, tightening the arm he had put around Tan-Mi's shoulders, and it contained all the relief it meant to be back to her.

*.*.*

Yifan had adapted quickly to Beijing, and now, about 6 months of happy domestic life after his moving, he was sure he had no regret over his decision. He worked either at home – the apartment he shared with Tan-Mi, or at Underguard – the shop in Beijing. He especially liked working there, because it enabled him to discuss the goods with the regulars, or with the one-time connoisseurs. He was going out of the staffroom and small office when was met with the annoyed face of his employee.

“Something's wrong ?” He asked.

“Hm, no !” She answered, a bit flustered. “It's just, I just got a call from Mrs Lee saying they need bigger-sized shirts. The ones they chose look too tight on the model... And since Yifei took the day off...”

“It's ok, I'll go.” He said. “The meeting I had at 3' has been postponed anyways.”

Yifan arrived at the studio half an hour later. He was ushered inside by the staff and guided to the main stylist coordinator.

“Ah, great!” The woman said when she saw him coming, a smile spreading her lips. “You're really sav...”

Yifan was not sure how she had wanted to finish her sentence, but her face had morphed into an expression of surprise, and he did not know what he should be expecting from her.

“Wu Yifan.” She said, pulling herself together and extending her hand. “I'm Kim Na Eun, nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you too.” He answered, shaking her hand, and switching to Korean. “I brought the shirts”

“Oh, right, come with me.” She gestured him towards another room. “So you work at Underguard ?” She asked. “I discovered the shop when I was in Hong Kong last time, I was so happy when one of the Chinese coordi told me there was one in Beijing as well !”

“Hm, thanks...” He replied quietly. He intended on telling her the shops were actually his when his eyes fell on the model working in the studio, which successfully rendered him speechless.

“Oh, right, Exo.” The stylist let out when she noticed Yifan's expression. “He is our model today.”

It would have been fine to just drop off the clothes and leave, but Tao chose this moment to turn charcoal eyes to the newcomers, and Yifan was struck by the suddenly blooming smile that was sent his way.

________________________________________

And let the taoris begin ~

I know it took a long time, but I promise the story's back to taoris interaction now :)