№ 23 ∞ Eternal / Gikwang
Aeternus ∞ Eternus
//Gikwang's POV//
I look at the clock. It's 11.57 PM now.
Three minutes until the day changes.
It will be Haemi's 21st birthday soon. I've been waiting the whole night to hit the call button so I can be the first person to give her the birthday greeting.
I'm not at the apartment right now; I am staying for two nights at Jeju Island due to my schedule. My recording for the variety show just ended around thirty minutes ago.
My mind starts to wander around, remembering the conversation I had with Aegi via Direct Message in Twitter.
She sent me five short text messages.
"I wonder if you will try to love Haemi. Don't you want a lover who can be your best friend?"
"Loving someone who loves someone else is indeed painful."
"All I said to you are the things I need to say to myself."
"I miss our old relationships."
"Gikwang, can we be just friends?"
My heart is aching whenever I read the last message from her. So I don't have any chance anymore. No matter how long I will wait for her.
She denied it before but I knew it all along; her heart belongs to Doojoon.
I sigh, leaning my back against the wall. It's 11.59 PM. One minute.
If Aegi asked me to try to love Haemi, why doesn't she try to love me?
I close my eyes, remembering the moments I had with Haemi. She has been there for me the whole time; she is the only person who understands me perfectly.
12.00 AM.
Right when I was going to hit the call button, the screen of my phone has changed.
Haemi is calling me.
I quickly touch the accept button, "Haemi?"
"Gikwang," she sighs in relief. "I think I'm lost."
"What?" I frown. It's midnight and she's lost? Where is she?
"I think I read the map right," she laughs awkwardly. "But I guess I'm just really lame to read the map of Jeju Island."
I blink.
"Where are you right now?" I stand up and grab my jacket. "Send me a photo. I'll pick you there."
After around ten minutes, I find her, waiting in a bus stop by herself. She is wearing her white jacket, that's why I recognized her from faraway.
"Haemi!" I rush to her side.
"Ah," her smile blossoms as she gets up from her seat. "You find me!"
I pull her into a hug. She made me really worried. What if something happened to her? It's midnight!
"What are you doing?" I hiss, hugging her tighter. "Why are you even here?"
Aish, I picked wrong words.
"I'm sorry," she murmurs slowly. "But I just want to see you. On my birthday."
I look at her eyes; she is holding back her tears. My words must have pierced her heart. I shouldn't say it.
"I'm not mad at you," I rest my forehead on hers. "I was afraid that something bad happened to you."
She can't even read map. She is not good with directions. Yet she is here now, at Jeju Island, in the midnight.
Just because she wants to see me.
Her lips curve into a sweet smile, the smile that I always want to see, the smile that I want to protect forever.
Why? Why can't I fall for her like I fell for Aegi?
"Saengil chukkahamnida," I lean closer to kiss her forehead. Her hair feels really soft and I love the feeling of kissing her.
"I've been thinking...," she clutches on my shirt, blushing slightly even though I can't see it clearly because of the dim lights. "About my heart."
My heart beats faster now.
"I know that you only see me as your best friend," she looks at me directly. "But I will wait."
Haemi said it firmly. She has made the decision.
"I will wait. I will make you love me," she smiles, both sad and happy in the same time. "Until the day, will you let me try to make you fall for me?"
"Will you be happy with that decision?" I touch her cheek gently with my fingers. She looks sad but I know when she has made a decision, she will hold on to the decision unless there is an unbreakable reason for her.
"I will be really happy as long as I have you," she chuckles. "As my best friend. As the only person I love."
I pull her into another hug, "Can I even say 'no' to you? I will never want to make you unhappy."
Maybe, just maybe, the day will come soon enough.
She is the most important girl in my life, besides my mother and Aegi of course.
Haemi is irreplaceable.
Maybe Aegi is right. I just need to try. Soon enough I might fall for Haemi.
After all, she is my best friend, right?
Maybe she is actually my soulmate.
+ Doojoon's POV +
Haemi sent me a text message, telling me that she has arrived in Jeju Island safely. I hope she will find Gikwang as soon as possible.
I can't accompany her to find Gikwang there. She has told me her decision: she is in love with Gikwang and she will wait for him.
I smile sadly as I put down my phone on the table. I open my shelf and take a photo album from inside, opening it and taking a look at each photo.
A picture of me and Haemi on my birthday.
A picture of BEAST and Haemi when we won our first award.
A picture of me, Haemi, and Aegi on Haemi's birthday.
I flip the pages until I reach the last page. It is the picture of me and Aegi together. We took it together when she asked me to accompany her for karaoke because she was bored and Haemi was busy with her works.
I can't hold my smile when I look at this picture. Her smile is really beautiful.
I feel really guilty though that I can't return her feeling. I was trying my best to treat her as my girlfriend in those two weeks, I still don't know why she could know that I was still in love with Haemi.
"Shin Aegi," I murmur her name. "You are indeed a special girl."
Suddenly my phone rings.
It's an unknown number. It's kind of suspicious because it's already midnight. All members have fallen asleep in the bedroom while I'm still wide awake in the main room.
"Yoon Doojoon," the familiar voice replies when I pick up the call. "Open the door."
Aegi?
I rush to the door and open it to find Aegi is standing in front of me with a box of cake in her hands.
"You're back...?" I frown. "When?"
"This evening," she hands me the box. "I want to give a surprise for Haemi's birthday."
"Yah, you should have told us if you want to come over," I take the box from her. "Haemi is not in her room."
"What?" her eyes widen with surprise. "But it's midnight already!"
"I should be the one who said that to you," I ruffle her hair. "What do you think you're doing to visit us in the middle of the night?"
To my surprise, Aegi's cheeks start to blush into pink shades.
Ah, I almost forgot how cute she is actually.
"Come in," I open the door wider for her to step inside. "Do you make the cake by yourself?"
"Yep, I know Haemi will like it," she steps inside, taking her shoes off. "She loves chocolate."
"And you don't really like cakes," I chuckle as I put the box on the table. "Don't tell me it's a white chocolate cake?"
She blinks, "How did you know?"
I know Aegi too well, don't I?
"Because you like white color," I pinch her cheeks playfully. "Do I even need to list all your favorites?"
She blushes again.
"I know you will like white chocolate too...," she mutters slowly after I released her cheeks.
Did I just hear what I thought I heard?
She remembers my favorite flavor.
I lean closer until my lips are next to her ear, whispering slowly, "Thank you, Aegi ah."
And I land a quick kiss on her cheek, making her blush even more.
Why do I feel my face is burning too now?
- Yoseob's POV -
I hit the send button. I just sent a text message to Haemi, giving her my birthday greeting.
She is somewhere at Jeju Island now. I hope she has found Gikwang now and I really, really hope Gikwang will give her a good answer.
Haemi deserves to be happy.
I touch my lips, remembering the moment I kissed Haemi when she was trying to tie my necktie. It was memorable and sweet.
For a moment, I thought that I had a chance for her now, a chance to be loved by her as a man.
But I guess her heart doesn't say the same.
Gikwang stole her heart and kept it without he even noticed. And I was wrong to think that the kiss meant that Haemi returned my feeling.
My heart is breaking. Really. But I know she is happier when she is with Gikwang.
And I want her to live happily.
I read my message to her once again before I drift away to sleep, hoping that this heartache will disappear on the morning.
"Happy 21st birthday, Im Haemi, my best friend, my sister. Be happy or I will be the one to make you happy! ^^"
__________
[Author's Note]
"I would never want to make you unhappy."
- originally from Enchanted #disneywords
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