№ 18 ∞ Doojoon/Haemi
Aeternus ∞ Eternus
//Doojoon's POV//
I'm waiting for Haemi at the park near our apartment. We used to meet up here with the others whenever we will go somewhere together when we have break time.
I don't have any special plan. Not that I don't want to do something for Haemi but I just want to have good talk with her.
She has enough with all frustration in her life lately and I want to give her everything she wants for today.
Well, actually I want her to be happy everyday, if she lets me to.
She has to meet our manager today to hand over the song she has composed for our new title track while I visited Aegi this morning.
I called her last night, after Yoseob returned from his date with Haemi. For all I knew, Yoseob's face did look a little bit better than Gikwang two days ago.
He didn't say anything to me. He just said that I need to cherish Haemi after everything she's been through.
I met Aegi at a coffee shop. I need to talk with her. It's been a while since the last time I had a long conversation with her.
"Ah, you're here," I sat across from her as I put down a cup of hot chocolate in front of her. I took a sip of my own cup of hot cappuccino.
She looked at the hot chocolate. She frowned, holding the cup in silence.
"You don't drink coffee, do you?" I put down my cup on the table.
Her eyes showed that she didn't expect me to remember that.
I knew she didn't like to drink coffee. She once told me when we were going to buy Haemi a birthday present. That day I was in charged for the birthday from all members so I though Aegi would be the best person to rely on.
"Thank you," Aegi took the cup in silence.
"You're welcome," I smiled, looking at her elegant gesture.
Aegi never changed. She always been the one who shows her charm with her gestures, her smiles, and her words. Somehow I understand why she and Haemi are best friends.
"Is there anything you want to ask me?" she opened the conversation, looking at me with her usual looks.
"Well," I cleared my throat nervously, "it's about Haemi."
"Of course it's about her," she chuckled. "I guess you just can't stop loving her, can you?"
She didn't use any sarcastic tone but I could detect a hint in her words.
"Aegi, I'm so sorry," I sighed. "About what happened between us before."
She shook her head slowly, forcing a smile, "Don't bring the topic again. I thought we've agreed about it."
"Haemi doesn't know about it, does she?" I asked.
"No. And I don't think I'm going to tell her soon. I don't know what she will say if she find out that we were in a relationship before," Aegi took another sip of her hot chocolate.
Yes, I was in a relationship with Aegi before. It's around a year ago, a month after my birthday, a month after I decided to let go of Haemi.
Aegi was the one who listened to me. She was there for me and when she asked me about what I thought about her when we were alone, I freezed.
I said to her that I thought I was in love with her.
With the thought that I could forget Haemi with a new relationship with Aegi, I started a relationship with Aegi.
But the relationship didn't stay long. She broke up with me after two weeks; no one knew about our relationship. She said that she couldn't continue a relationship with someone who didn't love her back.
"You were forcing yourself to love me," Aegi muttered calmly. "You only thought that you was in love with me while the fact was you're in love with Haemi."
"Aegi, I...," I took a deep breath. "I'm really sorry."
"Stop apologizing," Aegi leaned to the back of the chair. "Please promise me one thing even though you can't return my feeling."
I looked up at her.
"Please, promise me that you make Haemi happy."
I stand up from the bench when I hear the footsteps. Haemi is standing in front of me with black sweater. She wears a skirt and a white knit hat.
I smile at her.
//Haemi's POV//
This will be the finish line of Aegi's plan.
Doojoon asked me where I want to go for today but I didn't plan anything so I just asked him to accompany me around, looking around bookstores, music shops, and shopping area.
Gikwang sent me a text message this morning, telling me to enjoy the day with Doojoon.
Yoseob sent me a greeting via Twitter, saying that I am his best friend and his best sister, as if he's trying to tell all people in the world that he still loves me even though I don't love him back.
I can't believe that Aegi's plan is actually working for all of us.
Gikwang realized his feeling for me before we walked further and, even though I am hurting deeply, I am grateful that he realized his feeling.
I realized that I only think of Yoseob as my best friend, my brother, my family. And I'm glad that Yoseob finally understood my feeling.
And now Doojoon.
"Haemi ah," he ruffles my hair all of a sudden. "Are you even listening to me?"
"Eh?" I blink.
We are walking around a public aquarium. My mind was wandering while we're standing, watching the fishes as they're swimming around.
"I said that I don't want to eat fishes all of a sudden," he pinches my cheeks with a big grin. "Listen to me, Haemi ah."
"Aish," I giggle. "I won't cook fishes for you then!"
He pats my head gently and then he reaches out his hand, holding me hand in hand.
My heart skips a beat when I feel his warm hand. He drags me around the aquarium.
It's a good thing that the aquarium doesn't have too bright lightning or he will notice that I'm actually blushing really hard.
//Doojoon's POV//
We walk around the aquarium for almost thirty minutes. I look at my wristwatch. We almost spent time together for at least four hours.
I feel happy, really happy. It's been a while since the last time I enjoyed a day without any disturbance with Haemi. Works always stand on our way, of course.
"Doojoon Oppa," Haemi stops her step and puffs her cheeks. "Where does your stamina come from? We've been walking for four hours now."
Aish, why is she being so cute?
Her outfit. Her smile. Her everything.
"Yah," I let go of her hand and cup her cheeks with my hands, "don't you want to walk around a little bit longer with me?"
I can feel her cheeks are burning under my palms.
I've been holding her hand for a while. My heart is beating rapidly.
I love her.
I want to cherish her.
"Thank you," I lean closer to kiss her forehead, "for letting me treat you as my girlfriend for today."
I can see her expression has changed. She stares on the floor, having the apologetic expression on her beautiful face.
She must have forgotten that we are actually on date, according to the original plan.
I am her boyfriend for a day, right?
"Forget it," I pat her head softly. "Let's find a place to sit down."
I hold her hand again and turn around but she doesn't move. She stands still on her feet.
"Haemi," I embrace her hand and look at her sad face. "Don't make that face. I'm sorry."
"But you are sad because of me," she murmurs. "I should be the one who apologiz-"
Before she could finish her words, I cup her face with my other hand and kiss her lips.
This is the first time I kiss her.
But for now, we're lovers, aren't we?
Even just for a day.
//Haemi's POV//
"I want you to be happy today," Doojoon says with a sincere smile after he parted the kiss.
It's my first kiss with him.
It's different from Yoseob's and Gikwang's. I don't know how I can explain it, but it's just... different.
I am feeling really guilty. I almost forgot the fact that he has a crush on me and I'm on my way of figuring out my own feeling towards him.
I mean, I know I care for him. He is the one who cares for me whenever I'm at work, whenever I talked about Hyoseun, or whenever I'm trying to do new things.
He always be there for me.
His presence is different from Gikwang and Yoseob.
"Let's go back," Doojoon holds my hand again. "I think you need to rest for tomorrow's schedule."
I don't say a word. I follow him out from the aquarium. We take a taxi to return to our apartment.
Doojoon embraces my hand on our way back even though I don't say a word, as if he knows that my brain is thinking about a million things.
"Have a good rest," Doojoon lets go of my hand after we arrived in front of my room. "Thank you for today. I'm really happy."
I force a smile. Why do I feel that I don't want today to end?
He gives me a smile as he tucks my hair behind my ear, "You're beautiful, Haemi."
My heart starts to beat really fast now.
"Doojoon Oppa," I clench my fists, trying to gain focus. "Do you think you can stop loving me?"
I don't want to ask this question. I'm afraid of the answer. But yet I want to hear his answer.
"Haemi ah," he steps closer to me. "Loving you is like breathing. How can I stop?"
Then he kisses my forehead, longer than before, as if he will go faraway for me, as if this is his last kiss for me.
"Good night," he whispers and then walks to his own room, leaving me standing alone.
As soon as he leaves, my tears start to roll down.
Again. I cry again.
But this time is not because of the feeling of guilty or broken hearted.
This time is because I realize my own feeling.
__________
[Author's Note]
"Loving you is like breathing. How can I stop?"
- from @MelodiesOfHeart #melodies
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