The amount of time I spend with Jin has become slightly alarming. I’ve been taken to a few of Bangtan’s shows, music performances, practice sessions, and anything possible that Jin has been able to sneak me along with, anything official that he’s managed to get me to go to. We spend a lot of lunches or dinners with Joonyoung and I tagging along with Bangtan.

“Noona,” Jungkook says while I help set the table for lunch. “You and Joonyoung-hyung are like unofficial members of Bangtan.” He says happily. Joonyoung glances at me and smirks rather proudly.

“You guys are practically with us all the time.” Yoongi says lazily as he sits at the table, his phone in hand. “It’s pretty nice having you guys around.”

“You even talk more now.” Jimin says happily. Jin elbows him frowning as he does so. “What, it’s true. She used to only talk to you.”

“It is fine,” I say calmly, I pat Jin’s shoulder as I take a seat next to him and Joonyoung, a smile on my face. “So let’s eat.” I can feel Jin watching me nervously. “Stop staring at me.” I glance over at Jin and smirk slightly when he looks away quickly. I find that it’s easier for me to do things when I’m near Jin, more so when I get to be a little teasing, though that is rare for me.

“Hyung, you know you have that thing here with you, you should give it to Noona.” Jungkook says nudging his friend gently. “I bet it’d really make Noona happy.” He says while smiling at me.

I glance to Jin curiously smiling at him as I watch the now awkward Jin sitting next to me. “What’s this thing that you have for me?” I ask curiously.

Joonyoung chuckles slightly. “You’ve got her attention now.” He muses.

Jin sighs getting up hesitantly. “Hanbyulie, I got this for you for your birthday.” Jin says quietly. I feel my heart clench as I think about my birthday party and how disastrous it’d turned out to be. Jin picks a package wrapped up in pretty pink paper. “I hope you’ll like it.” He says sitting down and handing it to me.

I glance around the room and catch Yoongi’s eye, he nods to me encouragingly. “Thank you,” I whisper as I open the paper carefully. I nearly drop the gift on the ground as I realize what Jin has bought me. “Jin this is a lot.” I say looking over at him. “I can’t accept this, this had to be expensive.” I argue. I am happy that he’s listened to me after all this time, and while I’m not surprised he remembered, I am surprised he bought me the tablet I’ve been trying to save money up for.

“I thought you might say that,” Jin says gently. “Hanbyul I put some of your favorite books on there, and I even managed to get some of the books that we went to the readings of.” Jin explains as he pushes the tablet closer to me.

I look up at him as I tear my eyes off the device. “You spent way too much on this.” I say as I hold the tablet firmly. “You really didn’t have to get me something so extravagant.”

Jin smiles at me and rubs the top of my head. “Well you can think of it as an investment in your education by me. You can read all your books now without having to carrying them all around. You can even message me or anyone on it. Hanbyul, you work really hard, it’d make me happy if you kept it.”

“How can I refuse when you say something like that?” I mutter pouting as I look back down at the tablet. Setting the gift down on the table carefully I reach over to Jin and hug him tightly. “Thank you, I’ll take really good care of it.” I mumble into his neck.

“That’s all I want.” Jin says as he wraps his arms around me; hugging me tighter as I find myself extremely comfortable in his arms. When I finally pull away Jin rests his hand on the top of my head. “You should get back to school before you’re late.” He mumbles quietly.

I nod my head and glance back to Joonyoung; he’s holding my bag for me. “I’ll see you tomorrow Jin.” I mumble hugging him before I have to go. Picking up the tablet I wave to the others. “I’ll see you guys later.” I add on to a pouting Taehyung.

I put my bag handing the tablet to Joonyoung before following him out. “You both are getting close.” Joonyoung comments as we walk to his car. “Jin getting you to spend lunch with him is pretty impressive.”

“It’s more impressive we’re able to. They’re in the middle of promoting, plus they’re super popular now, they just keep getting more and more attention.” I say smiling rather pleased for my friends. “What about you, you seem to like spending time with them too.”

“Well they’re pretty interesting, I mean Yoongi, Namjoon and Jungkook make some great points about music.” Joonyoung says happily. “But seriously, Hanbyul you really seem to be clicking with Jin.”

“He’s helped a lot, you too.” I say quietly as I consider how much has changed in the course of a month. It’s nearly September now. I can hardly talk to Solbi; I haven’t seen or even talked to Sohee since my birthday.  “Anyways we should get going.” I say nodding towards the road.

“You’ll need to talk to Solbi and Sohee eventually you know. You can’t just run off to Jin as your safe zone every time you get uncomfortable.” Joonyoung says as he starts the car. “Don’t get me wrong, I like that you have someone new to talk to, that you’ve made new friends, but Solbi and Sohee are your friends and they’re being patient with you about all this.”

“I know,” I mumble as I lean back into my seat. “It’s kinda hard to talk to them. They both give me these looks that you’d give a kicked puppy.” I say with a sigh. “I don’t like that.”

Joonyoung chuckles. “You really are a regular person.” My best friend jokes as he goes through traffic. “Sohee really wants to talk to you, but I think she understand better than Solbi about giving you the space you need.”

“It’s from when we were in high school.” I answer simply. Sohee I definitely need talk to again, she’s been there for me for years; this whole Taejoon thing can’t be the end for us, at least not without talking about it. Then again, I doubt Sohee would let this be the end of our friendship. I do miss Sohee and Solbi, but there is still the whole Taejoon situation which hasn’t been solved at all. How do I talk to them and not think about Taejoon, about how despite everything, I still love him.

I jump slightly as my door is opened. “You know, you’re the biggest space cadet I know.” Joonyoung says playfully, holding a hand out for me. “But I love you anyways.”

I smile at my friend thankfully as I accept his hand. “You’re the most intimidating person I know, and I love you too.” I offer with a grin as I grab my bag off the floor of his car. “We need to hurry so we aren’t late.” I say as his alarm goes off.

Joonyoung smirks at me in return and nods for us to take off running. With his help I manage only to trip over my feet instead of falling face first onto the cement. We make it in time to take our seats before the bell for class goes off. “That look on your face said you were thinking about him.” Joonyoung says quietly as class begins. “Hanbyul, please don’t let him eat away at you like were. Please.” He mumbles almost inaudibly.

I glance to my friend and see him completely focused on what our professor is saying, I realize how much I must have been hurting Joonyoung all this time, that by allowing myself to be that miserable, my friend had to simply watch as I was being stranded by my own feelings on my own accord. Throughout the class I glance to Joonyoung feeling a sense of belonging with him. With someone who has watched over me in a way that I’ve needed, shielded me from things, told me the truth even when I didn’t want to hear it.

At the end of class as Joonyoung and I are packing out things up to go home I stop my friend. “I promise I won’t let it happen again.” I tell him firmly. I think with this, this is the first time I’ve been able to let go of a little piece of Taejoon, and instead of the dread that I always thought would fill me when I could actually begin to let go, I felt nothing but relief. 

I'm so sorry it has been so long since I last updated!
I've finally gotten back into a writing groove for some of my stories and I
know I tend to fall out of them quickly, but I promise, I'll finish this!
I love you my ducks.
And as always, enjoy the update!!