A week has passed since Luhan spilled the whole story about his tragic past to me.

Even though my heart aced for the fragile boy, I couldn´t help but to feel happy about that he had trusted me enough to tell me so soon.

During these last couple of days I´ve been busy trying to get even closer to Luhan, which wasn´t very hard concidering that we shared a room and spent barely any time away from one another.

I also discovered that me and Luhan had quite a few things in common.

Just like me he had a passion for soccer, and I promised him that once we both out of the white walls of the hospital we´d have a one-on-one game together.

The smile that Luhan gave me when he realized that I was serious about wanting to be his friend outside of the hospital was simply stunning.

I´d play soccer with him for the rest om my life if he´d just continue to smile like that, I´m not even lying.

He also liked coffeé a lot, and even though I preffered my coffeé as simple as possible while he preffered whipped cream and toppings, it still was another thing I could add to our list of common interests.

I also learned that there were a couple of things that´d freak Luhan out of his mind.

The first one was heights. Quite a common fear I know, but when you´re not afraid of it yourself it can be pretty terrifying watching someone have something close to a panic-attack when exposed to it.

I learned that the hard way when Luhan and I went up to the hospital roof to chat and Luhan went a little to close to the fence, seperating him from free-fall down to the concrete ground,  for his own comfort.

Jumping back with a high-pitched whine he curled himself up into a ball of deer-patterned pyjamas (I know what you´re thinking, and yes he looks adorable in it) and orange-brown hair.

It took me half an hour and a lot of pleading, soothing words and promises of returning to our room before he finally untangled himself and looked up at me.

Let´s just say that I´m very strict with letting Luhan anywhere near the roof after that.

The second fear Luhan possessed was a slight sting of claustrophobia.

Luhan wasn´t like the typical claustrophobic who´d panic as soon as they were put into a small space. No, Luhan could handle small spaces just fine, given that there was light.

Me and Luhan had been playing hide and seek with some younger kids from another floor when suddenly the power went out at the floor we were currently playing at.

Seeing as there were no patients who could take harm from the loss of power (currently nobody on this floor are using a heart monitor 24/7 or something alike) everything played out calmly as we decided to end the game early.

It was only when the children had made their way down to their own rooms that I realized that Luhan hadn´t come back yet.

Searching through every place I could think of, panic soon began to eat away at me.

Just as I was about to call a nurse for help did I hear a faint banging sound.

Sprinting towards the source of the sound, I soon located the janitors room (a 2x2 meter room barely big enough to fit one person) where someone was banging on the door hard from the inside.

”Luhan is that you i there?!” I banged at the door as well, to tell Luhan that I was there, just in case he couldn´t hear me.

”Xiumin! Please, please help! I can´t open the door. It´s so dark in here. Please help me!”

I was take aback by the sheer panic in his voice, and I immediately set off to find someone who could open the door. It didn´t take long for me to find a nurse, who hurried off in order to find someone with a key to the said room.

As she ran off I went back to Luhan, who still hadn´t stopped screaming since I left him.

Curling up outside the door, I let a tear fall down my face, feeling so useless because there was nothing i could do to comfort my friend who needed me.

I tried to scream back to him through the door, but in his clouded mind which was filled with nothing but panic and fear, he couldn´t hear a thing I was saying.

This time it was my turn to curl up into a ball, as I cried into my knees while listening to Luhans heart-scattering screams.

Thankfully, after what felt like an eternity, the door was finally unlocked by one of the janitors, and Luhan came barging out as soon as he realized that he wasn´t locked in anymore.

I immediately brought the crying boy back to our room, where he continued to wail and scream, his mind still not fully understanding that he was out of the cramped, dark space and back in our shared room.

I held him close as he cried, and when he finally stopped I made him promise to never hide in anything with a lockable door/opening ever again.

I think I´ve never seen Luhan nod his head so many times at something i said.

The third fear, is a fear unknown to me.

Something that I do know is that this fear scares Luhan more than hights and small, dark spaces combined.

This fear has appeared every single time he´s been sleeping during the last couple of days.

At first I thought it was a nightmare about his parents´death, like the first night we spent together,but I soon realized that these nightmares were different.

Instead of calling out to his parents, he kept on screaming ”no no, please don´t” in his sleep, and when I try to hug him when he wakes up, he slaps my hands away before finall realizing that it´s me. He´s always so shaken that it takes me at least an hour before he has completely calmed down, and another thirty minutes before I have him convinced to go back to sleep.

Whatever this fear of Luhan´s is that keeps occuring when he´s visiting dreamland I´m determinded to find out what it is. The imiages of Luhan´s tear streaked face is enough to keep me up wondering all night long. Hopefully I´ll find it out sooner than later.

The last fair is by no doubts the strongest one. The fear of being left on his own.

That Luhan was affected by his parents´death was obvious. Since Luhan had no other close relatives, lived on his own since a couple of years back and was obviously bullied at his university and current work-place he didn´t have anyone who came to visit him.

The only one he had after all of this was me, and I definetely had no problem in being the person Luhan trusted and put all his faith in, because he really did.

Luhan held the promise I´d made to him close to his heart, and he kept on asking me if I really meant it, and if I was sure that I wasn´t going to just abandon him when I got tired of him.

No matter how many times I reassured him that meeting him was one of the best things that´d happened to me since like forever, he still just wouldn´t believe me.

However, I never got mad or annoyed with him. Rather the opposite actually.

Seeing as Luhan was so desperate to stay by my side it really made me feel like I was finally worth something more to someone than just a friend or a colleuge.

To Luhan, I was everything now, his whole world cirkled around me, and even though I of course was extremely sad about the sad faith of the boy I still couldn´t help but to feel completed.

It could be the smallest of things. Like how Luhan would tip-toe over to my bed at night and ask permission to cuddle up next to me. How he would hug the teddybear that I had ordered for him, through my friend Chanyeol, tightly and smile fondly at it whenever it came into his line of view. Or how he´d tell me how incredibly happy he was that he´d met me and how he wished that we could stay together forever.

Of course, I wished for that as well.

That´s why I recently had began to wonder, what Luhan really was to me.

Because one thing was for sure, and that was that Luhan was definetely not just another friend to me.

Or best-friend for that matter.

No, the feelings I was feeling towards him was definetely something more.

It was terrifying but so beautiful at the same time.

As I lay there in bed with Luhan snuggled up next to me, I couldn´t help but to plant a soft kiss at his forehead before whispering into his hair.

“What are you doing to me Luhan?”

A/N : How was that? Hopefully it suited your likings ^^

I really should be doing school-work right now, but writing helps me relieve a truck-load of tension and stress. Plus, I just love writing xiuhan ( ^ v ^)

See you all soon!