10
Tangled Faiths(SONG REQUEST: COFFEE BY BTS)
"Sulyeon," Junhyung's fingers slipped onto my thigh. They were warm and woke me from my deep reminiscing. "I already ordered."
"Oh, hehe." I blushed from humiliation sinking in. I was zoning out while he was conversing with the waitress, I probably looked like I didn't want to be here. That was wrong, I wanted to be here, everyday if I could. Ice cream was a huge part of my diet, I come here after I study with Junhyung to celebrate my little accomplishment. Basically for anything small like that we both come hand-in-hand to this mom and pop's shop to eat great quality dairy.
"Here you are, enjoy." The waiter placed our cup in front of us, the spoons already shed the plastic and were jabbed into the ice cream. Cookies and Cream, my favorite ice cream. I liked ice cream more than some people, it was difficult to believe but now I embrace it.
"Thank you," Junhyung and I said in unison. The man had a frightened expression then it eased into a small grin.
He dug in, retrieving a spoonful of frozen deliciousness and fed me. I hummed to express my delight then I fed him as well. Usually we would finish our treat either babying each other or cuddling. We could care less about what other's thought, the school children didn't mind and neither did the elders, but the people around parent's age scolded us. Punishing us with their judgmental glares for being innocent lovers, shamelessly pecking each other on the cheek. It wasn't like we were exposing everything we had for them to look at us that way. It was just irritating sometimes but Junhyung paid no attention to them, he was focusing on me. I should do the same.
"You have some on your," he motioned with his finger. "Near your lips."
I endlessly rubbed at the spot he was staring at, having no clue if he was just messing with me or actually telling the truth.
"Where is it?" I swirled my tongue around to see if I could catch even a drop.
"Here." He leaned in closer to my face, pressing his lips gentle on my cupid's bow, then shifted down to my lips. My mind blanked out, I knew this was going to happen but when and how it was going to feel caught me off guard. On a typical day, he would just peck the spot or pass his tongue over it- like the crazy boy he was- for a brief second. Now, this moment, the ticking seconds passing by, he was leaning in deeper as if he was going to lose me. My fingers found his resting on the seat beneath us, I was holding on for something. For us, spending the rest of our lives together as the perfect couple. Junhyung gradually pulled back, his glossy eyes showing under his half-lidded eyes.
"I love you so much." His eyes were teary. Why was he crying? What going on, did something happen? In any shape or form, Junhyung was not the one to display his emotions so easily unless it was an issue so important to act like he was now. He was a cold city boy, someone who concealed themselves from others, secretly so they wouldn't result in getting their feelings tattered and played with. His once arrogant way he used to speak to me was to protect, defend his pride, his self-esteem, his sensitive heart.
He muffled his gasp for air by swiftly covering his mouth, he didn't want to cause such a great scene. One tear rolled from his eyes but he shut them voluntarily quickly after. Was he embarrassed to sob in front of me or in the sight of others? Why was he crying in the first place?
"Are you alright?" I shook his arm once, twice, three times then he turned to warmly embrace me. "Why don't we stay together.. tonight?"
"No," his hoarse voice cracked from the lack of breath. I didn't rush him for a reply, not wanting to startle him anymore than he was as of right now. "I don't want to be a burden anymore."
"Hey," I clutched onto his wrist. "You were never anything like that to me. Junhyung," I beckoned him for his eyes, for him to witness my own sincerity pouring out. Then slowly, gradually intertwining our fingers together in a firm hold that I desired to last for an eternity more. For more eternities than ever thought upon, for the rest of my life, I wanted to spend it with this man. No, I needed to, I required his presence to breath, to live, to be motivated.
"I wanted you to live a normal life-"
I jerked his hand up with me to stand. Retrieving from my wallet a ten-dollar bill, I handed it respectfully to the cashier and claimed for her to keep the change. I had no time to glance at her surprised grin for I was already dragging Junhyung out of the little shop. How come he was all emotional suddenly? No time for answers, I contemplated to speak my mind but I kept my mouth zipped for his sake.
"We're going home," I spoke with an unintended harsh tone.
"Drive me home."
My irritated sigh didn't contain like planned and I just complied to his desire, no matter how much I wanted to punch him for mumbling idiotic ideas. They were ideas, they weren't the fact. I wanted to tell him that I felt like I was a burden, I was the one off him as if I was a defenseless tick or leech. Urging to make him see with his own eyes that I was willing to do anything for him, under any conditions, standards, consequences, for a purpose of claiming him mine.
"I'm staying the night at your place, okay? I can't allow you to think these things that are obviously not true."
Comments