❄ { 004. KangTeuk } Breathe
❝ℕeorago❞ — A Super Junior Oneshot/Twoshot CollectionTitle: Breathe
Pairing/s: KanginxLeeteuk
Song featured: Breathe by Taylor Swift
Warning/s: n/a
A/N; Rewriting this a/n bc I'll be deleting the original home of the oneshots. Please subscribe here!
I see your face in my mind as I drive away
'Cause none of us thought it was gonna end that way
People are people and sometimes we change our minds
But it's killing me to see you go after all this time
A bittersweet breakup has always been the reason why Leeteuk decided not to go in a relationship again. He promised himself not to go into anything that involves love, since he is sick of all the drama and the excuses he heard.
His life turned around when he met Kangin, a young, dashing lad of 27. They have been best friends since their middle school years, but soon developed feelings for each other. They never realized how their friendship drew so much affection and attraction to each other.
There were times that they would fall apart, but soon afterwards be back together. They can't stand a day not talking to each other and slowly go back together. Until now, they are still best friends.
Days went by as he pondered on one question: Have I fallen in love with him?
They would do different kind of skinships: holding hands, hugging, wrapping one's arm to the other and placing one's arm over the other's back. Sparks starts to fly as their skin touched, electricity flowing and such.
Leeteuk decided to keep the feeling to himself. Slowly, he closed his eyes and tried not to cry. If he confessed his feelings, then they'll be mutual and Kangin will be forced to court him.
He doesn't like to fall in love again. He kept it to himself and waited for the perfect time for him to tell his best friend the truth.
After a while, he started to somewhat avoid Kangin, but he can't explain why he does that. Is it because he doesn't want him to be hurt? And he doesn't want him to slowly fade away like him now?
- - -
Never wanted this, never want to see you hurt
Every little bump in the road I try to swerve
People are people and sometimes it doesn't work out
Nothing we say is gonna save us from the fall out
Kangin's eyes lingered, looking where is his best friend has gone off to. No familiar figure was seen, no cheeful voice was heard. The younger is already getting worried where his best friend is.
"Kangin-hyung!" a voice which made him turn around. He wished it was him, but it's not. It was just his classmate, Hyukjae. He heaved a sigh and turned back around.
"What's up hyung?" his ever-so-cheerful voice asked as he glomped onto him. Kangin just shook his head and sighed, I'm not okay Hyukjae, go away.
"So down in the dumps, huh?" Hyukjae said as he sat down beside him. "Yeah. A little," he said under his breath, wishing his younger friend to leave.
"What happened?" the monkey asked, not looking at his hyung. He knows that there's something wrong with him.
Kangin looked at him, realizing that Hyukjae's not hillbilly and hyper like before. He felt the concern of his friend so he started his story, "Leeteuk started to ignore me. I don't know why, but I don't want to be hurt anymore. I like him, Hyukjae, I just can't tell it to him straight ever since he's ignoring me completely these past few days."
Hyukjae just nodded, and suddenly remembered the time he and Leeteuk talked again, "I talked to Leeteuk-hyung two days ago. He's feeling a little lonely though."
The older perked up, wanting to hear what he and his best friend talked about.
"He was not in the usual mood, though. He's more like calm and quiet. I asked him if he's okay, then he told me that he's good. I saw tears in his eyes while he was looking down, so I immediately wiped his tears," Hyukjae started. The older's hands started to clench because of what the younger did to his best friend.
"He told me that he likes you, hyung. I was happy about it, but he told me that's the reason why he's starting to avoid you these past few days," the younger continued as he turned to his hyung with a sad face.
Kangin's eyes widen, "M-mwo?" Hyukjae slowly nodded and sighed, "Hyung, he doesn't like to be in a relationship ever since. He hates bittersweet breakups. He got traumatized with it. I feel so sorry for him, though."
The older's eyes started to water as he heard the reason why his best friend is avoiding him. He can be the best boyfriend he can ever have, and treat him right. But no, he can't even lay a touch on him. He missed him.
Hyukjae patted his hyung's back, "I'm sorry hyung." Kangin just nodded and cried, missing his best friend so much and how much loss he had.
- - -
And we know it's never simple, never easy
Never a clean break, no one's here to save me
You're the only thing I knew like the back of my hand
And I can't breathe without you but I have to
The older male walked away real fast, away from the people inside the university he's studying in. His bag is not that heavy and his books are all in his arms. A slight move of his arms will eventually make the books fall on the ground.
What he's really scared of is seeing his best friend right in front of him, on his side or even at his back. He's too scared to face him the truth.
A tap on the shoulder was felt, making the older spin around to see who, until it was Kangin. He gasped and walked faster, his books starting to fall from his arms and his coat getting all wet. It's raining, and damn, he didn't bring an umbrella.
"Leeteuk, please! Stop!" Kangin called out, but his best friend didn't look at him. He was too busy running away from him, away from all the confusion and the pain.
"Park Leeteuk! Aish! Stop running! I have to tell you something!" Kangin tried again, now running faster than his usual pace. Leeteuk just ignored him, walking faster
"Park Jung-soo I have something to tell you!" the younger shouted, making Leeteuk halt. He then slwoly turned around and saw Kangin right in front of him, just a few feet away.
"Why?" he asked, not looking up at him. Kangin sighed, "If you like me then why are you running away from me?"
Leeteuk didn't reply, still not looking at him. He felt himself turning red, but felt a fang of guilt inside his heart.
"Because I want to?" the older angrily said, not looking up. Kangin sighed and moved closer, "Just tell me why." He knows the reason why, but he wants to hear it from his best friend's mouth.
Leeteuk then can't hold it on and suddenly fell on his knees, "Because I don't want to be in a relationship. I hate bittersweet breakups. I hate it. I'm sorry."
The younger's eyes started to swell up, and ran to him, hugging him tight. "I like you, Leeteuk. We can do this, I promise," he murmured, but except for a hug, Leeteuk started to resist.
"I-I can't. I-I have to leave you, and stay away from you. I-I'm sorry," the older said and walked away as soon as possible, wiping his tears.
Kangin just sighed, and realized he will never have Leeteuk. He loves him, more than a friend. He likes him and promised to protect him until forever ends. His heart was crushed as he heard those words.
I have to leave you.
He punched the tree in frustration and cried. He will never give up on him, never in his whole entire life.
On the other hand, Leeteuk was ready to let go, but he doesn't know when. He feels like he's inside the swimming pool, but he's all alone and he doesn't know how to swim. No one was there to save him. He wanted to hold his breath while he's underwater, but as oxygen decreases, he wanted to breathe. He loves Kangin more than his life, but he had to let go.
I can't breathe without you, but I have to.
i've already edited 3 oneshots, thanks to new experiences and realizations in life lol— please check out the rewritten versions of gotta find you (kangteuk), only one (yewook), and back to december (eunhae)! <33
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