f o u r
If You Loved MeMoments later, Dongwoo walked out of the dance studio, hoping to find Hoya but he was nowhere to be found. He was truly concerned for Hoya and he wished that Hoya would just tell him what was going on. Perhaps there was a way to help him... But Hoya just wouldn't speak up.
Dongwoo searched everywhere to look for someone who had seen Hoya, but it seemed that no one was around. Dongwoo fished out his phone to call the members, but none of them responded. He growled frustratedly, he never felt this annoyed in his life.
He was all alone in the dorm, where could the members have gone?
Hoya opened his eyes to see more blurry visions.
"Howon-sshi... You're awake..."
Hoya knows that voice, he had been hearing her voice ever since he had been constantly visiting the hospital.
"Dr Lee..." Hoya murmured.
"Please..." she said. "I feel really awkward when my patients call me that. Just call me Misung."
"Misung..." Hoya repeated.
"Your teammates are waiting outside the room, do you want them in?" Misung asked.
"Have they all found out?"
"I'm afraid so..."
"Sure..." Hoya sighed. "Call them in..."
Hoya could see the woman in white walking towards the door, allowing his teammates to enter the room.
Something was missing, Hoya counted the number of people in the room: other than Misung who was in her white uniform, there were only 5 other people in room. He predicted that Dongwoo was not around to see him in great sufferings.
"Hyung ah... Why didn't you tell us about this...?" A high pitched voice, that belonged to Sungjong, spoke.
"Can you see us...?" Myungsoo asked, waving his hand in front of Hoya's eyes. Hoya then lightly nodded.
"Does Dongwoo know about this...?" Sungyeol asked.
The name resonated in Hoya's eyedrums.
"Hey, let's not talk about him in front of Howon..." Hoya could hear Woohyun whisper.
"Will I be able to perform for the comeback day?" Hoya asked.
Hoya could see a figure, that he guessed belongs to Sunggyu, walk to him.
"Don't worry... I won't let your fans down. And I'm sure you will be able to perform on that day." Sunggyu said, with assurance.
Hoya nodded again, feeling sure that he will be okay.
Misung, who was standing next to Hoya, then spoke, "If anything goes wrong on the comeback day, please give me a ring, alright?"
"Why don't you come backstage with us?" Sunggyu suggested.
"What...?"
"I'm quite sure the only person, who knows what to do when Howon is in a bad situation, is you..." Sunggyu said.
"I..." Misung murmured. "Alright..."
The days to the comeback is numbered, Dongwoo was constantly getting isolated from the members and he felt really depressed. He thought he did something wrong so he would cry every night on bed, alone. The only person that still talks to Dongwoo was Sungjong, being the cheerful maknae.
"We're alright... It's just that we're tired..." Sungjong said.
Dongwoo understands, they all get really tired coming to the comeback day, and with Dongwoo assuming that Hoya was still sick and currently resting at home, Dongwoo always felt alone whenever Infinite has dance practices as his dance partner was not around.
Finally, the comeback date has arrived. 6 members of Infinite were ready to head off to their stage.
"Hey..." Dongwoo said. "Are we waiting for Howon?"
"Howon will be going straight to the venue..." Woohyun said.
And with that, the six members boarded their van and headed off to the studio.
The entire van ride was awkwardly quiet, with most of the members falling asleep in their seats.
Dongwoo remembered how their previous comebacks were all exciting and the members would never shut up during the van ride to the studio. They would practice singing the songs in the van and they would go all crazy. But it seemed that it is now a memory...
After arriving at the studio, they head on down to their dressing rooms, greeting their sunbaes and hoobaes along the way like CNBlue, SHINee, EXO, After School, etc. Dongwoo then saw him, Hoya... With somebody... Somebody he did not recognize. She appeared to be very caring, he neatened up Hoya's hairstyle before giving him a little pat on the shoulder.
"You can do this!" She said.
Hoya then stared into her eyes, like how he would on Dongwoo, and that made Dongwoo cringe.
"Thank you..." that was all Hoya said, and he walked towards the dressing room.
Dongwoo quickly turned around to avoid being seen.
"Hey Howon, how're you feeling?" Sunggyu asked casually.
"Better than ever..." Hoya said.
Sungjong quickly whispered something into Hoya's ears, and Hoya turned towards Dongwoo.
Dongwoo stopped in surprise when Hoya started walking towards him.
Hoya then opened his arms and wrapped around Dongwoo gently.
"I'm sorry..." Hoya whispered softly into Dongwoo's ears.
They hugged each other for a long time.
"Let's do this together..." Hoya said confidently and they broke away from the hug. Dongwoo nodded with a big smile on his face and he walked off.
Hoya then thought to himself, "Let's do this together... Perhaps for the last time..."
With that all 7 members of Infinite were ready to take the stage for their comeback, they were warmly welcomed on stage with the loud cheers of Inspirits. They then took stage and began to perform their long awaited comeback that the members put in a lot of effort in preparing.
When the song ended, the members bowed down to their fans and left the stage, except for Hoya who stood rooted to the ground, unsure of what to do.
"Dongwoo!" Hoya suddenly called out.
Dongwoo turned around to Hoya's voice and approached him. "Anything wrong...?" Dongwoo asked.
Hoya was just staring out and his hands fidgeted. "Can you hold my hand?"
Dongwoo was a little surprised at Hoya's request but still fulfilled it. The fans in the audience couldn't hold their screams as they saw how sweet they looked together. Dongwoo then stared into Hoya's eyes while he was just staring out and in a daze.
"Let's get off stage now..." Hoya whispered.
Dongwoo nodded and he led Hoya off stage, backstage.
Dongwoo looked up to see the lady again, just waiting there.
"Howon-sshi!" She shouted. "You were amazing on stage... I almost didn't realise..." she then stopped to see Dongwoo looking suspiciously at her.
"Hey Misung..." Hoya said, Dongwoo finally knew what was her name. "I need to tell you something...." Hoya let go of Dongwoo's hand, waving his hands around for Misung's hand. Misung quickly grabbed his hand and the two of them walked off, leaving Dongwoo alone.
Dongwoo felt very unhappy that he was constantly getting isolated, especially away from Hoya. He felt insecure when Hoya is sick but he's not there to take care of Hoya.
All of them, including Hoya and Misung, gathered back in the dressing room, Sunggyu had an important announcement to make.
"Today will be the only day where Howon will he promoting with us and he'll be taking a break..." Sunggyu announced. "We'll only have one week of promotions and we'll have individual promotions. Myungsoo will be casted in a Japanese drama and he'll need to be away in Japan. Sungjong and Sungyeol, you two need to start practising for subunit activities. Woohyun will be going solo, Dongwoo will be assigned some song writing tasks to do. Did everyone get it clear?"
Dongwoo wanted to know why Hoya needed such a long break. And he had done many songwritings, but not without Hoya. He sighed at the thought of it.
"I'll be bringing Howon-sshi back to the hospital alright?" Misung said. Sunggyu nodded and the two of them left the dressing room.
Dongwoo wanted to follow. He had the urge to hold open the door and follow the two of them. And so he did. He quickly got onto his feet and ran out of the dressing room.
"Yah! Howon! Misung!" Dongwoo shouted. The two of them turned back to his loud calling.
"Can I follow you two to the hospital...?" Dongwoo asked.
There was an awkward silence among them.
"Uhm..." Dongwoo started. "Sunggyu told me to follow..."
Hoya knew on the spot that he was lying, but he knows that Dongwoo was still concerned for him. Perhaps it may a great time to reveal it...
"Sure... come along..." Hoya said. Misung looked at Hoya objectingly, but Hoya just gave her an assuring nod.
With that, the three of them left the studio and headed on down to the hospital.
In the hospital, Dongwoo waited patiently outside the ward while Hoya and Misung get changed from their stage and casual wear respectively.
He just waited outside, watching other patients, visitors and doctors walk pass him. He could hear some female patients and nurses whisper,
"Oh my gosh! It's Dongwoo from Infinite! He's so cute in person! I wonder why is he here...?"
"We have Hoya as one of our patients here, remember? He has got some condition and I'm sure the members are aware. That was why Hoya will not be promoting as said in the news!"
"Some condition?" Dongwoo heard and got suspicious of the situation. There is seriously something that Hoya was not telling him.
The door behind him opened and Misung came out of ward with her nurse attire, that was Dongwoo realises that Misung is Hoya's nurse.
"Uhm... Don't go in yet... Howon-sshi needs to rest, I'll be back in a while and you can come in with me later on..." Misung said and she left in a rush.
Dongwoo continued to walk back and forth before a man in a white coat entered Hoya's ward and came after a short while, looking around.
"You are Lee Howon's teammate right?" He suddenly asked, looking at Dongwoo who was still in stage wear. Dongwoo nodded awkwardly.
"Can you do me a favour, to tell Nurse Misung to make sure Hoya gets a scan today?" He asked. "Apparently, the cancer cell growth around his eyes is slowly decreasing, which is a good news... And..."
"Wait... Cancer?!" Dongwoo couldn't believe his ears. "Did you say that Howon has cancer...?"
"Dongwoo!" Someone shouted. It was Misung, who came back from getting a certain document. "I got this under control... Bring Howon for a scan later today, right?"
The doctor nodded and he walked off. Misung then turned to Dongwoo, who was furious and also extremely heartbroken.
"I need an explanation... What happened to Howon? Cancer in his eyes...? Eye cancer?" Dongwoo couldn't hold his anger.
"Dongwoo..." Misung whispered and she pushed the door to the ward open. "Why don't you ask him yourself...? Howon-sshi would do the rest of the explanation..."
Dongwoo then enters the room to see Hoya on the bed, staring into space. His eyes were soulless and dead, as usual.
"Howon-ah..." Dongwoo slowly walked next to Hoya's side.
"Hyung..." Hoya murmured.
"Can you please..." Dongwoo started. "Please tell me what happened to you... Do you have any idea how worried I am for you?"
Hoya, still staring into space, just said, "I was worried that you may be unable to accept the truth... So I decided not to tell you."
"The members knew about it too, right? But you told them not to tell me..."
"Sunggyu wanted to tell you, but I stopped him... cos..."
"Have you everything considered my feelings? Do you know how I am really depressed every day, getting isolated not only by you, but by the other members too?!" Dongwoo started to cry.
"They were worried that you will find out about my condition..." Hoya cried, as well.
"I cannot..." Dongwoo was too sad for words and he laid his head on the bed and started sobbing.
Hoya raised his hand and placed it gently on top of Dongwoo's head, gently patting it.
A few minutes later,
"So according to the doctor, the cancer cell growth around my eyes is slowly decreasing. But the extent of the cancer cell growth has highly affected my eyesight..." Hoya explained. "So now... I'm partially blind..."
Dongwoo, who was calm after the break down, nodded, understanding the whole situation. Misung was just the nurse in charge of taking care of Hoya while he was diagnosed with stage 1 eye cancer.
"I don't know if I'll be able to see anymore..." Hoya said. "I was afraid... That I will not be seeing the things I love..."
Hoya then raised his hands up, moving it towards Dongwoo's face. Slowly, reaching and touching Dongwoo's face and rubbing it softly.
"I'm going to miss looking at your face, Dongwoo..." Hoya said, with a weak smile.
Dongwoo felt really bad and sorry for Hoya for no longer being able to see. He shed a tear for the thought that he's no longer visually there for Hoya. He thought, if only he was well enough to get a pair of new cornea.
"I want to go back to the dorm... It's been days..." Hoya suddenly said.
"Alright, sure." Dongwoo said. "But after your scan tonight..."
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Hey guys I am backkk~ <3 I finally finished my exams and I will be able to update more frequently now! ^^
But for now I will be away for a short holiday to Tokyo and Seoul, so I still can't update just yet! So that's why I updated a long chapter (actually I combined 1 and a half chapter, and hence it's longer lol)
Hope you enjoy it! ^^
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