Jay ate her breakfast alone in the dorms cafeteria. Of course it wasn't the best and she couldn't even say she missed have a home cooked meal. She hadn't had one for a long time. If her dad felt generous one day he'd come but only give her the smallest portion sometimes from the bottom of the pot which was always burned. Eating with Aria had distracted her from the blandness of the dorm food but today she wasn't there. Biting her lip she replayed what Taeil had told her. "She didn't fall down the stairs Jay." Her mind went blank. Then how did her best friend get so badly beaten? She was missing something. As she sat there and thought her mind drifted off to last night.

Jong Woon had never showed up for their date but somehow they ended up in the same bed together. A nightmare that had started the moment she closed her eyes finally jolted her awake. She let out a small scream and sat up in the foreign bed. Here scared eyes roamed the room seeing things unfamiliar to her, a boom box, a pile of cloths, posters but the strangest thing was that she was in the same bed with someone else. Staring up at her was the same man she had waited all night to be with. Using one arm he pushed her back down.

“Good Morning Jay,” He whispered wrapping his arms around her waist and bringing her against his chest. She pushed him away and scrambled to the other side of the bed.

“You never came.” She said her gaze filled with hurt. He averted his own eyes but then forced himself to look at her.

“I’m sorry.” Was all he could manage to say. “I’m so sorry Jae Hwa.”

    There was a chilling silence that filled the air. Jay stood up from the bed and headed straight for the door. Jong Woon quickly stood up and grabbed her arm turning her around refusing to let her walk away from him.

“I told you already that’s not my name.” She said her voice shaking. Jong Woon sighed, he was really screwing things up.

“But on the medical forms-“

“That’s not my name! It hasn’t been for years so don’t call me that!! You can’t go around calling people something they hate or doing what you want behind someone’s back because you feel like it!! If you don’t understand the reason behind it you have no right to tell me that it’s my name!! It’s none of your damn business Jong Woon!!!” She shouted at him, her head was down her eyes trained on the carpeted floor. On the other side of the door Taeil stopped cold in his tracks hearing Jay screaming. This time he wouldn’t get in the way, the guy needed a wakeup call even if it brought Jay out of character. “I-if….you liked Ary more than me then….I…..” She sniffled as her tears built up blurring her vision. She knew he didn’t like Aria more than her but it was really hard to keep that fact in her head because of what she had seen and the events that followed soon after. Why were things getting so messy?

“Jay don’t get things mixed up please! Let me explain!” He said pleading with her but she shook her head and took her arm back.

“I don’t want to.” She whispered quietly.

“Jay please….” He begged again trying to touch her arm but she backed away hitting her head against the door.

    Shaking her head again she ran out of the room to Taeil. He hugged her tight and didn’t bother to try and reason with her. Jong Woon had messed up and he wasn’t going to justify what happened.

“I’ll take you back to your dorm.” He said. “Just give me a couple minutes.” He glanced up at his bedroom door then handed her the keys to his car. “Wait for me downstairs.”

    Grateful she took the keys and almost ran down the stairs. Taeil went inside his room to find Jong Woon sitting on his bed his head between either of his hands. When he came in he looked up hoping it was Jay.

“Oh Taeil.” He said disappointed.

“I told her to wait for me in the car.” He reported no emotion in his voice other than sadness. “Hey man, Jay…why don’t you give her some time before you talk to her again? She needs some space.”

“I don’t have a choice do I?” He replied bitterly.

    He really had screwed up. He stood her up at the movies, called her by her name that she told him before not to and gotten a scolding. This relationship seemed to be ending before it really began.

4 Days Later

    Aria sat in front of her television flipping channels like there was no tomorrow. There really wasn’t anything that she really wanted to watch. She was just bored. Taeil had been taking care of her for the past couple of days to make sure she didn’t do any type of work. He wanted her to just focus on recovering. In between classes he would stop by and check up on her, bring her breakfast, lunch and dinner and also sleep over to keep an eye on her. Even though they had confessed to each other his main priority these days was making sure she recovered. He promised himself that when she got better they would talk about what happened, about what was said and take action from there.

    It was pretty early in the day. Both Taeil and Jay were still asleep so it was normal that nothing decent was on tv. She got up and went to her friend’s room where Jay was fast asleep under the covers. She giggled. Jay had a strange habit of covering her whole body from head to toe with her bed sheets. If you didn’t look twice you wouldn’t have known that there was someone is under there. She sat on Jay’s bed and uncovered her. They hadn’t been able to go out for a little while since she was still trying to recover from Woohyun’s beating. She wanted to tell her soon so that she really wouldn’t have to hide anything from her anymore. It felt like they had grown so far apart since she started dating Woohyun and she hated herself for it.

    With a sigh she covered her head again and was going back to the living room when she spotted her medicine chart on her desk. Aria hadn’t checked Jay’s chart or her progress in a long time. Seeing it she froze up. There were four whole days that held no record. Jay’s routine was to take her medication three times a day, Morning, Afternoon and Night and she always recorded her symptoms along with the times she took the medicine so that when she went to the doctor he could see her progress and make sure she stayed on track. Seeing a single day without record was unusual but four of them was alarming. Jay couldn’t suddenly stop taking her medication, it was life threatening. Aria gazed down at her friend worriedly then left her room with the chart tightly clutched in her hand. Moments later Taeil came out of the bathroom his hair damp. He had woken up while she was in Jay’s room and his routine was to immediately take a shower and get himself ready so that he would be fully prepared to take care of Aria or even Jay if needed. He sat beside Aria a towel around his shoulders.

“So what do you want for breakfast today baby girl?” He asked smiling a little. But Aria was in no mood to smile she just watched the television for a couple more seconds. “Hey…what’s wrong? Are you still in pain?’ He asked worried. She had been doing pretty well the past couple of days. But she shook her head telling him she wasn’t hurting anywhere. “Then….”

“Jay hasn’t….she hasn’t taken her medication in four days.” Aria whispered showing him the chart she picked up. It was a bit crumpled because she had held it in her fist so tightly. Taeil looked at her then took the chart noting the four empty days.

“Maybe she took them but didn’t record anything.” He suggested trying to look on the bright side. But Aria just shook her head again.

“She wouldn’t forget. Jay has been on meds since forever. Every time she takes it she records it. If her heart palpitates she records it. The only reason she wouldn’t record something is if she hasn’t taken it. She can’t do that! Taeil four days?! She could die!! She can’t go that long without taking her medication!”

“Aria.” He said firmly. “You need to calm down. I can’t having you worrying this much when you’re finally getting better. I’ll talk to Jay and try to find out what’s going on so please stay relaxed.”

“But she’s my best friend. I should be taking care of her. I should have checked it every day like I said I would.” She put her head in her hands at a complete lost.

“I understand baby girl. But panicking now won’t help her. You can make up for it but first you need to focus on yourself before you can focus on her. Go get ready for class and I’ll talk to her when she gets up, ok?” He said squeezing her hand. She nodded slowly looking up at him. He placed a small comforting kiss on her lips and tasted the salt of her tears that he thought she hadn’t shed. “Everything is going to be alright.” He whispered giving her a quick hug before sending her off.

Jay’s POV

I can’t breathe.

    That’s all I could say to myself as I started to come back into consciousness. Everything was still dark around me and I wasn’t sure if I had opened my eyes yet or not. All that I could focus on was my inability to take deep even breaths. I would stop short before my lungs were full and it was frustrating. It felt like there were heavy rocks on my eyes that wouldn’t let me open them. So all I could do was wait and see if I was still alive. It felt like hours before those rocks were moved. Slowly my eyelids fluttered open and the sun burned my eyes. I squinted before opening them even slower than before. Glancing over at my alarm clock I saw that it was still early.

    As I sit up I cover my mouth as I cough like an old person, hard and long. With a sigh I lean on my bedhead relieved that the coughing subsided. It hurt so much. Why did I have to be born with this sickness? It was so frustrating that out of all the people in my family I was the only one who had it this bad. Not that any of them actually cared about it. Unfortunately another set of coughs overcame me and I had to go under the covers to make sure no one heard me. It hurt to cough. I remember when I was smaller and I got sick a lot, the mucus would build up in my chest but no matter how hard I coughed it wouldn’t come out. Instead it made my throat sour and even breathing made my larynx feel as if knives were scarping down on it. That’s exactly how I felt now and it brought painful tears to my eyes. When I stopped I went to grab my inhaler and other medication but I just stared down at it.  Three inhalers, pills of different shapes and sizes, albuterol inhalation solution, the nebulizer and the mask that came with it.

    Seriously what guy would want a girl as sick as me? Pretending like everything was ok wasn’t my strong point like Ary. If I am hurting it isn’t hard to figure it out. If I really want to hide my pain then I have to take my pain killers so I can deceive myself into thinking I’m fine. My thoughts drifted back to a couple days ago, seeing Jong Woon with Ary. It would have been better if he actually like her instead of me. Being so sick would only come as a burden to him. But my jealousy wouldn’t go away. It was all consuming making me shake and filling me with impatiens. Then right after that I would be so ashamed with myself. Aria is my best friend and she doesn’t like him. She loves me and she loves Taeil, she would never do anything to hurt me. Yet here I was thinking bad things of her. Does love really make someone this ugly?

“What am I doing?” I whispered to myself throwing all my medicine to the side. “I can at least go a week….at least a week.” I looked at the medicine then away. If I could at least go a week without taking it then I could go two weeks and then three so maybe I won’t be such a burden, maybe I won’t cry so much and I’ll be another step to being normal.

    But that wouldn’t fix everything that suddenly looked so shattered. I got out of my bed and went into my bathroom to get ready. Bathing with hot water in my condition wasn’t the best idea but I wanted to fight against anything and everything that paralyzed me with fear. Once I got dressed I sat back down on my bed and stared into space.

“I miss him.” I murmured into nothingness. I laid back in bed and turned to my side seeing the stuffed animal he bought me I wrapped it in my arms and held it against my chest. “I miss him so much.”

    Why had everything ended up like this? I mused as I started to cry alone on my bed just like I’ve been doing for the past couple of days. I saw him with Aria smiling like a goof before he was supposed to meet up with me, then he never came and I stayed waiting for him for three hours. It was dark and I was alone and my medicine made everything worse. To put the icing on the cake he called me,

Jae Hwa.

    Out of all the names I hate in the world he had to say that one and I just snapped. I couldn’t take anymore and I shouted at him and told him to out and he really had. He hadn’t called me, texted me, or even left a voice message and it was all my fault. I felt so stupid for being so jealous, sensitive and sick. If no one else was going to punish me and tell me I did wrong at least I could do it in my own way.

    Getting up I cleaned my face then picked Jonggie back up. Without eating anything I took two 800mg pain killers and went outside. They would help until my day was over and if anything I would take two more at lunch. Just getting through the day would be nice. When I left my room I left all of my medicine in there. I had taken it with me for these four days but I didn’t want to today, one day without lugging them around wouldn’t kill me.

Taeil’s POV

    I was sitting on the couch my chin on my hands. A long sigh escaped my lips as I watched the tv change from one image to another. How had things gotten so complicated? At least Aria was recovering which made things a little better. But my blood still boiled at the thought of that bastard hurting her. Any girl compared to him was small and frail, what the hell possessed him to beat on someone like how that? It surprised me that Aria was even recovering so fast and I was sure it had to do with Jay. She just wanted to be there for Jay so no matter what it took she wanted to get better soon.

    Speaking of Jay, Yesung was giving me a damn headache. After their failed date neither one of them had contacted each other. I thought that Yesung would have grown some balls and called her first but that obviously had not happened. Now Aria told me Jay had stopped taking her medicine.

“Jeez,” I whispered to myself. “What a mess.”

    It was so obvious why she stopped taking her meds. But then there also maybe reasons that I myself don’t have. My main priority had been nursing Aria that I didn’t check up on Jay much. For Aria to find out so suddenly made me feel like crap. I wanted to take care of both of them but my attention had been elsewhere damn it. I had to tell Yesung. Something needed to be done before anything bad happens. Just as I made this decision from the corner of my eye I saw Jay come out of her room. The pig rabbit stuffed animal Yesung had given her clutched tightly in her arms. She closed her door she didn’t look up but I could see her face was sad and she looked like she was in pain. I immediately stood up.

“Jay?” I said a little panicked. She looked up surprised her eyes looked so tired as if she wasn’t resting well.

“Oh, hi Taeil.” She said waving her hand her words clipped. She took a deep breath then smiled up at me. “Is Aria doing better?” She asked cheerfully.

“Jay we need to talk.” I said not wanting to go around the bush with her. Confused she cocked her head to the side and held the pink stuffed animal tighter. My gaze shifted from it back to her face. “Come sit down.” She did as she was told and sat down beside me. So I got straight to the point. “Jay I know you’re not taking your medicine.” Her eyes widened in shock and she visibly stopped breathing for a moment.

“H-How….” She started to ask but I just held up her chart in response with the four days blank. The fifth day which was today I was sure wasn’t going to be filled either.

“Whatever the reason is it doesn’t matter to me. But you need to take them, Jay. You know better than anyone else how dependent you are on them.” She held the stuffed animal even tighter. “Please Jay if Aria or even Yesung see you back in a hospital bed…..” I trailed off not sure what to say next.  Aria would be freaked out. On top of Woohyun beating her adding her best friend in the hospital again, I wasn’t sure she would be able to take that.

“Does he even care about me anymore?” She asked her voice shaking a little. “He hasn’t called me or even sent me a message.” I glanced down at her stuffed animal and sighed.

“I’m sure he does. He’s just trying to figure something out. But until he does please start your medicine back up. Please Jay.” I pleaded with her. But she gave me no answer. Instead she put the pig rabbit in her backpack and smiled up at me.

“Thanks Taeil. I’m going to class first.” She said closing the subject. I sighed.

“Did you at least eat anything?” I asked.

“Not hungry.” She responded before standing up. “I’ll see you in class ok?”

    I watched her go and close the door behind her. I wasn’t sure if anything I said had gotten through to her but all I could do was hope it did. The next thing I had to do was tell Yesung. If I couldn’t reason with her maybe he could. Aria was in no shape to do this, not yet at least.

    By the time Aria came back outside it was five minutes before class. She gave me a worried look as she picked up her bag.

“Where you able to talk to her?” She asked me I could only sigh.

“I talked to her but I don’t think I got through very well. I’m going to tell Yesung what’s going on.” I said pulling my hand through my hair. I hoped that he could do something and help her.

    Aria bit her lip and nodded. It was definitely the best thing to do. As I walked her to class my thoughts went back to the conversation I had with Jay. It sounded like she was wheezing but I wasn’t entirely sure. But I didn’t have a good feeling about today. Something was off and I didn’t like it.

    After my third and final class for the day I headed towards Aria and Jay’s dorm room to wait for Aria. I just wanted to meet up with her for a little bit since it was towards the ending of the day. Most people were still in class or off to work at their part time jobs so it was the perfect time of day to meet. A couple minutes later I saw her coming down the hall way and meet her half way. Giving her the biggest bear hug I could manage I buried my face in her hair.

“How was class?” I asked relieved to have her in my arms. For a good portion of the day I had this strange feeling in my arms. I wanted to hold her and it annoyed me during the day when I couldn’t. It was

“Boring,” she replied with a giggle her slender arms wrapping around me loosely. I kissed the side of her cheek lightly. “Taeil cut that out.” She whispered. When her voice got that low I knew that the last thing she wanted me to do was stop.

“Aniyo (no),” I said stubbornly before planting a long and passionate kiss on her plump lips.  I stopped kissing her then looked down into her eyes before giving her another hug. “I missed you.”

“It hasn’t been that long since I went to class,” She whispered and I could feel her heart start to beat faster. I smiled.

Normal POV

    Both of them just held each other after those last words left her lips. It could have been an hour or even five he would have still missed her. He had spent so much time with her this past week that it was hard not to. Inhaling the scent of her hair and skin he felt that he could get drunk off of it. Then he felt her body for ridged in his arms. Scared he stopped hugging her but instead held her arms in his hands.

“Baby girl? What’s wrong?” He asked unsure of what would cause the sudden change in the relaxed atmosphere they were in. But she didn’t say anything. “Aria?” He asked again.

“Taeil let go.” She whispered back completely horrified.

“What?! Why?! Did I do something that hurt you?!” It suddenly dawned on him that she wasn’t looking at him at all. Her eyes were focused to his right and she hadn’t budged on inch he wasn’t sure if she had even blinked. “Ar-“He said but stopped when he turned his head.

Woohyun.

    He stared back at the two of them.  His eyes held a hint of craze that Taeil wanted to think he imagined. But it was there and there was no avoiding it. Aria started to shake but didn’t tear her eyes from Woohyun, his own eyes made contact with her own. She visibly flinched.

“Taeil let go! You have to let me go now!” She said panicking but he wasn’t listening. He wasn’t going to not this time.

“No.” He said stubbornly. Without thinking twice he grabbed her arm and dragged her into her dorm room and locked the door.

“Taeil are you out of your mind?! What if he gets even angrier!?! He’ll come in here and-“

    To shut her up he placed on open mouth kiss on her lips. His tongue slipped into and he on it slightly. When he pulled away Aria was breathless and a lot calmer than before.

“I won’t let him take you away from me again.” His voice was husky and raspy as he tried to gather air into his lungs. He had done everything so impulsively he didn’t really get a chance to breathe and think. But now he knew exactly what he was thinking. She was his and nothing Woohyun did would change that. “Not again and nothing you say will change my mind.”

    Her heart started racing hearing those words leave his mouth. Impulsively she wrapped her arms around his torso laying her head on his chest. He did the same and kissed her head holding her tight. For the first time in months she felt safe.

“Don’t worry about anything. I’m going to protect you and everything is going to be alright.” He whispered hoping that he would be able to keep his promise.

    Jay stood in front of the dance practice room holding her stuffed animal in her hands. She really needed to put the thing away but she couldn’t. Her heart had been acting up all day and she wasn’t feeling well. Holding it eased the anxiousness some but it also made her miss Jong Woon. She skipped her Korean class because she wasn’t sure she could face him right now. Taking a deep breath she decided that tomorrow she would try and talk to him. With her mind set she opened the door to her dance class to find it completely empty aside from Daehyun. He was stretching on the floor when she remembered she still had Jonggie in her arms. Quickly she stuffed it inside her bag.

“Dae Dae?” She asked coming up to him. He glanced up at her and gave her a fake smile.

“Oh hi. Class was canceled.” He said going back to his stretches.

“Ah I didn’t get an e-mail or anything. Do you still want to practice for the competition?” She asked sitting down beside him.

“Yeah I guess.” He replied standing up. Jay watched him confused.

“What’s wrong?” She asked standing up in front of him.

“Nothing. Let’s start.” He said not looking at her.

    Still confused she nodded and the music at the far end of the dance studio. They started the choreographed routine but with little energy. She kept making little mistakes and he wasn’t having it. Every time she made another one they would start the whole thing over from the beginning. Half way through their practice she was doing good but her heart started to do weird palpitations she tried to ignore it but ended up tripping over him and crashing on the floor. Sighing he glared down at her.

“Jay what the hell?!” He yelled tired and annoyed.

“S-Sorry.” She said completely out of breath. “D-Daehyun my bag….” She started to wheeze trying to get more air into her lungs. She always kept an emergency inhaler in her bag which she now remembered was in her hidden compartment. Daehyun grabbed her bag from the floor and gave it to her.

“Did you suddenly forget EVERYTHING we’ve been doing?!” He asked frustrated that this was about the tenth time they had to start from the top.

“I didn’t forget. I’m sorry…I-I….” She tried searching her bag, every compartment that she could find she ripped open. It wasn’t there. Her inhaler was gone. She started to panic, she didn’t remember taking it out at all during the week. That was her back up, if all else failed that one inhaler was her only back up.

“How about you stop playing around with a teacher and focus on what’s really important here! The competition is Friday! Friday Jay!!” He rolled his eyes completely done with this. His crush was dating a professor, how could he even compete with that?

“That’s not fair!” She shouted back despite her severe shortness of breath. Being angry at her was one thing but taking it out on the fact that she was dating Jong Woon was another. “He has nothing to do with this right now so you leave him out of it!!!”

“Oh really?!” Daehyun scoffed. “It has everything to do with it!! You shouldn’t be dating a teacher!!! You’re completely losing focus on what’s important!! He’s nothing good for you!” Talking to Youngjae had made him feel better but it was just hard to digest. Jay was dating Kim Jong Woon the Korean Language professor, he had completely missed all of the signs that she wasn’t interested in him in a romantic way.

“I told you to leave him out of this! Don’t insult him ‘cause he’s twice the person you’ll ever be!” She shouted back upset. The high level of emotions was making her breathing even worse.

“He’s twice the person because he’s twice as old! You need to look at guys that are around your same age!! What are you blind?!” He shook his head. “I should report him now! For all you know he can be using you!!” He retaliated by kicking his bag across the room. This was so stupid!

“Jong Woon-ah isn’t using me!!” She shouted back then she choked some. “Y-You don’t know anything about him!!! Don’t talk as if you do!!” Her air cavities were starting to constrict refusing to let oxygen pass through. Not noticing her struggle he kept going.

“I can say whatever I want about it!! This situation isn’t normal and you shouldn’t be caught up in it!!” He shook his head and folding his arms in front of his chest.

“No you can’t….” Her voice was fading. “I won’t…..I won’t let…..” Her vision began to blur. “I won’t let….you…..”

“What is it now? You suddenly can’t defend him anymore?” He said watching as her eyes shut and her body crashed to the floor like a rag doll. “Jay this isn’t funny.” He waited a moment hoping that she didn’t really pass out in front of him. “Oh no….” He whispered kneeling down at her side and putting her head on his lap. She was drenched in a cold sweat.

Her effort to breath double as she curled into herself and started to hyperventilate. Sure that he had left the room she started bawling. Her chest hurt so much, she felt nauseous and couldn’t breathe and now she couldn’t even get up to walk. Hearing her fall he turned around and stopped in his tracks. The next minute he was right at her side kneeling down and trying to uncurl her from her ball.

“Jay?” He asked. But she was unconscious at this point. Her lungs were still working double time to get air in but they couldn’t. So she just laid there her breathing stopping then starting at random intervals. “Oh my god,”

    He had to think quickly. Pulling out his phone he called 911 and spoke with the operator. Once he hung up he pulled Jay onto his back and jogged outside to the lobby of the performing arts building. The ambulance was there in about 10 minutes. He gave them whatever information he could about Jay and hopped into the ambulance when they strapped her in a bed and gave her an oxygen mask.

    Taeil glanced at his watch. Only one more minute until class ended. He looked at Aria and knew that she had not been at all focused on what was being taught. Jay had not come to class and she hadn’t called Aria either. Jong Woon had continued to teach his lesson like normal but it was evident he was worried about something. He kept making errors on the board and tripped over his words. Taeil wrote a small message on a piece of paper then passed it to Aria. Hesitantly she opened it up.

‘After class I’m going to talk to Yesung about what’s been going on. You don’t have to wait ok?’

‘Yes I do,’ she wrote back ‘I’ll wait for you.’

    Jong Woon dismissed the class and sat down in the chair by his desk as he watched everyone leave. As he had seen ealier Jay wasn’t in that crowd of people.

“Yesung,” Taeil said coming down from his seat holding Aria’s hand.

“How is Jay doing?” He asked immediately. Not texting or calling her was killing him but he wanted to give her space. He was worried that he was staying idle for too long but had no idea when was the best time to approach her.

“About that,” Taeil said holding Aria’s hand tighter. “She hasn’t been doing very well.” He confessed. Aria bit her lip.

“What do you mean?” He asked starting to panic a little.

“She hasn’t taken her medication in four days and……she just….she can’t do that Yesung! Please talk to her because if this keeps up she could….” Her eyes started to water.

“You’re joking right? She wouldn’t be this irresponsible….” Jong Woon said looking down at his desk to see all the papers scattered about. He started to fix them. “Where is she?” He asked suddenly. He put all the papers in a neat stack at the side of his desk. “Tell me you know where she is,”

    As Taeil started to shake his head Aria’s phone started to ring. She took it out and her eyes widened in surprise.

“It’s Jay,” She said brightening up. “Hello!” She answered.

“Aria! Aria its Daehyun Jay passed out during practice!! I called the ambulance and we’re on our way to the hospital. Please come with her information ok?” Daehyun said with the ambulance siren in the background.

“How did that happen?” She asked numb with disbelief.

“I’ll tell you later. Just please come.” He hung up the phone before she could respond.

    Aria just stood there the phone still at her ear. Taeil put his arms around her shoulders and pulled her into a hug.

“What’s wrong?” He asked. She turned around tears streaming down her eyes like a waterfall.

“Jay passed out. She had another asthma attack and Daehyun…..he called the ambulance. They’re on their way to the hospital.” She whimpered breaking out into a full on sob.