~Yuna~

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As I was holding my coffee, staring outside the window , enjoying the view from JaeJoong´s office, I was thinking. Hard. Alot and it was giving me a migraine. A heavy sigh, proably the heaviest one so far was heard and I wondered what could possibly go wrong from here. Or was it really wrong?

Just the thought of Jae having alzheimers I wondered if I was going to be able to handle it. HIm asking me who I was, being different from how he is from me now. Maybe the only time I would be able to find him peaceful is when he is asleep. In that way I would be able to cuddle up against him and just pretend that we´re sleeping right next to each other like we used to.

I felt everything bubbling inside of me and I dropped the cup of coffee as I had to embrace my chest.

NO!! Why him?! OUT OF ALL PEOPLE WHY HIM?! What has he ever done to deserve anything like this?

I fell down to the floor behind his office desk and cried silently as I covered my face

"YUNA!!"

I was suddenly mad at myself for bursting out into tears at the office where probably anyone would be able to see me.

Changmin was soon by my side and helped me up and walked me over to the couch as he tried to get the coffee spots off my skirt and my burned hand that was now red

"Yuna.."

"Leave it Changmin" I whispered

"What´s wrong?" He asked

"You know" I whispered and stared blankly ahead, not meeting his eyes

"Know .. what?" He sighed

Changmin stopped by my left hand as I felt him staring at my ring

"It´s beautiful Yuna. Congratulations" He said, trying to sound happy

I didn´t say anything. Yesterday Jaejoong had proposed to me, which was amazingly sweet of him and I was pobably the happiest girl on earth. And here I am, today at the office crying because of the possibilities of him forgetting me. Gosh how I hated the world right now

"Thanks" I said after a long pause

"We should get you cleaned up and you should change clothes"

"Where is Jae?" I asked

"He´s finishing up with the meeting for the Spring collection. He´ll be here in an hour I think" Changmin said

"Don´t tell him I broke down"

Changmin scratched the back of his head and looked at me frustrated

"I won´t.." He said

"Thank you"

"You need to let it out though.. you know that right?"

"I can´t. You know that. I can´t keep on crying like this. What would this do to Jae? What would it do to him!! I need to stay strong. I need to .. be strong for him. And Me"

"Look when Jae broke the news to us, he said that the results wasn´t final yet. We´re still waiting" Changmin said

"But just knowing that the possibility is there, just behind the corner Changmin doesn´t mean that it is totally minding me" I screamed

Changmin looked at me

"I know it´s hard and I know it´s only to get a lot more worse once the results are out"

"Don´t lose hope Yuna"

"I feel like there is no hope"

"You´re about to get married" Changmin said

I looked down on my hand and stared at the beautiful ring. Yes I was about to get married. Why can´t I be happy about it instead of crying because of a chance that was 50/50 at the moment?"

"Don´t let the negative things overshadow the happiness"

"He told all of you this morning?" I asked

"Yes he did and he told us briefly about the alzheimers. I was already suspecting that something was wrong with his health when he told me to arrange a meeting with a doctor... I just wanted to confirm it and all of us knew that his mom had it that there might be a possibility in the future that he would have to undergo the test but we´re trying to stay low because Jae isn´t the kind of person who talks about things like that... until you came along" He whispered

I looked at Changmin who smiled

He then came forward and embraced me

"Thank you Yuna. For entering his life" Changmin said

I hugged him back as I tried to take deep breaths, calming myself down

"I´m here always if there is anything okay?" Changmin said and let go of me, watching em carefully. I nodded

"Let´s get you cleaned up and your make up redone. Jae will be here shortly"

I nodded. Changmin hurried outside to give a few calls down to the floor of clothes to get me new ones. He also called the make up artists and hairstylists as well. I took another deep breath as I tried to gather myself

The breakdown was good for me. I felt relieved. But I couldn´t have anymore breakdowns in the future. One is enough.. For now