Hyukjae POV

 

-flashback-

On Hae's room.

 

 

"I'm so sorry Hae. I know it all after we met."

 

"After we met on that park or after I gave you the umbrella?" I saw a flash of hurt on his eyes.

 

"Before we met on the park." I said lowly.

 

"If you know OUR condition. Then why did you let me to get you? Why don't you push me away??"

 

"I tried, hae! I tried to! But, I can't!" I paused. "I tried to runaway from you, after my father told me everything. I was always distance myself from you. Until, you asked my name."

 

"It's just an excuse." He's snort.

 

"I was not! At the first time I saw you, I didn't know that you are the one that my father told me about. He told me,  he met a woman, beautiful and caring woman who can fulfill the position as his wife and a mother to me. He had a son, about a year under me. Never, for once, he told me a name of him." I looked at his eyes, but the warm one has gone. "The day when you saw me at the park, was the day when my father told me that he wants to marry her and asked her to live with us. He showed me her picture. I was shocked when I saw your face on that picture too. Then he told me, I will be going to see them and be one family." I can't keep my tears, I wipe it with the back of my hand.

 

"But still, you keep that on silence. You were pretending like you don't know me."  I never saw Hae's straight face, He always gave me the warm gaze. But, this time, I see his cold, hate, and hurts stare.

 

"Because I already loves you, hae! I don't wanna lose you!"

 

"But you are belong to someone else, Hyukjae!" He yelled at me. "You'll soon to be someone's wife! You loved him!"

 

"I don't!  I don't love him, okay?! He's just my closest friend. My childhood friend that apparently become my fiance! Because our family told us so! It just politics!"

 

"Still, it won't change anything. You'll get married with him and my mother will marrying your father. What should I do then?"

 

"Hae.. Please. We can do this. We figure it out how to change it." I reach his hand but he's yanking it away.

 

"Don't be so selfish. There is no way, hyukjae."

 

 

Now I'm on my own bed, my mind is wondering from last night. I feel bad, I feel awful, I feel like I'm betraying him.  He was so sad and hurt. He thought that I was being selfish for not letting him know what's going on.  I don't mean to make him feel like that, I want my father to have someone to love again, I want to have a mother and being pampered by her.

 

But how about my feelings?? I love him. Finally I have the guts to know him, to get close to him, and  to be loved by him. Why everythings seems so hard for me now.

 

I cried very hard that night. After he knows my real name, He call me by my full name. He even ignore my calls and my messages. Now, my father punish me because I was being an obedient child for him. I can't get out from this house.

 

 

 

Donghae POV

 

 

After a long conversation with him, I still can't accept the situation. I have my own happiness, that's what I thought about hyukkie, no, I mean Lee hyukjae. I can have him, I can show him to my mother, I will take him everywhere, I will make him happy and I will show him to the world who's he belong to. But now, I can't.  My happiness is gone.

 

My mother suddenly show me her soon-to-be-husband and her-soon-to-be son whose apparently her soon-to-be son in-law. I feel angry. I know I'm still a teenager, but she's my mother, I should protect her, I protect her from the moment my father's died. Does she lose her faith on me? If she already found the one she loves, she has to tell me! I feel betrayed. My mother and Hyukkie. They've betrayed me.

 

I'm laying with my stomach on the bed, not knowing how should I face it, how should I control it or how should I take it later. Because I can't face my mother and my soon to be father being lovey dovey while I still believe my mom's love for my father are still strong. I can't control my feelings towards Hyukkie, whom I know now that he's one and only son of Lee's industry,  fiance of Choi Siwon, the only son of Choi corp. I fall in love with him, my first love, my first obsession. But, I have to accept it now, that he'll be my brother. I should try to take it all. I lose my mother and my Hyuk.

 

 

"Hae, baby." My mother peeking from the door. "Are you okay?" She came into my room and caressing my hair.

 

"Do I look okay to you, umma?"

 

"I don't mean to cover things from you, Hae."

 

"You don't trust me. You lied to me."

 

"I trust you, I'm not lying."

 

"Then why did I found this marriage things just now? Why didn't you tell me from the first time you met?"

 

"I'm not ready and I'm scared that your not ready too, hae." She's in the verge of crying but I can't stop it now. I want to know why she's like this.

 

"Because what? I'm still kid? I won't understand?"

 

"It's not like that. I'm scared that your father will hate me, you, my only son will hate me."

 

"......"

 

"I'm scared if this just a crush and for long time I never been in love.  Except for your father. I care for you, hae. I don't want to lose you."

 

"But, you make me lose my first love." I whispered it to her.

 

"I'm sorry. I don't care about your feeling. If I know that you have a relationship with his son, I won't proceed the marriage."

 

"....."

 

"You are hurt. I know that."

 

"....."

 

"Alright. I'll canceled the wedding." I feel the weight lift my bed.

 

"Don't." I lift my head. "I want you to marry him." She frowned. "I don't want to be selfish. Because from the way you stare with each other, it's the same way when I look at you and dad."

 

"Baby, I don't wanna be selfish either. You love him." She's hold me in her arms like I'm fragile.

 

"My happiness is for you, umma. If he's not my fate then He won't be my mate." We were crying and hold on each other. "Please, be happy for me and dad."

 

"I will, son. I will."

 

 

 

-couple of months later-

 

 

Donghae POV

 

"So.. Donghae, right?" I nodes when this guy, named Yesung ask me to follow him towards my own bedroom. "I hope you'll be happy to live with us. Our hyuk prepare this room for you. He choose every single things in this room by himself. " He smiles.

 

"Thanks." I bowed to him.

 

"Makes yourself comfort. It's your house now. You're my responsibility from now on, because your mother never stop asking me to take care of you and make me promise to always send her your report from here."

 

"You don't have too. She's just being paranoids. She's scared that I'll kill myself." I put my luggage on the floor beside the couch. I look into the place. So this will be my own room from now on. I think. This room isn't far from my past room, it painted with blue but some spot were covered by wallpapers, some of the furniture look the same, it's just very clean and neat, and not my style but I know it's hyuk's job. He wants me to feel home.

 

"He gave me the picture of your past room. He was warned me to look for all the things on your bedroom, the same way you put it into. If I make even a single mistake, He won't ate." He chuckled. "He was angry when I picked the wrong paint, but the time was getting close, so he covered it with wallpapers." I smiled at the thought. I miss him.

 

"You're very close to him, I see."

 

"He's my little brother. I love him with all my life." I bit my lips, Because I love him with all my life too. "He loves you. He really is." He pats me on my shoulder.

 

"He'll getting married."

 

He stare at me for couple of second, before saying. "I'm sorry I can't do anything now."

 

"You don't have to." I look at the floor.

 

"Take a bath now. I'll be waiting for you downstairs, so we can have dinner together, okay?"

 

"Okay." I take him to the door and ready to close it when He turn his head towards me.

 

"Call me hyung from now."

 

"Thank you, hyung." At least I have someone to talk to in this mansion.

 

 

 

I heard some noises from the kitchen. It's the voice that I know and I missed. After the wedding of our parents, Hyuk was going to Japan for his study tour. It's been a week, I'm sure he'll be here today.

 

"Hyung!! I told you, Hae doesn't like spicy food! And where is my strawberry milk?? Hyuuuuunngg~~~"

 

"Hyukkie..calm down. I go get your milk and that food isn't spicy at all. Go sit, Because I know you're tired."

 

"It has chilly all over the food, hyung! Look! Red! It means,  spicy!"

 

"No, it's just tomato. Now, sit down while I prepare your milk."

 

I chuckle while looking at their behavior. Yesung hyung is very calm and patient, but Hyuk is very childish and demanding.

 

"Finishing your bath already?"

 

"Oh-umm ye-yeah..."

 

"Sit down, hae. I'm preparing the food." He nod, show me where to sit.

 

I sit in front of Hyuk, never for once he’s looking at me. He's busy with his fork.

 

"So, hyukjae hyung. How was Japan?"

 

"What did you call me?" He look up straight towards me, frowned all over his face.

 

"Hyukjae hyung?" I keep my face straight, trying to look innocent.

 

"Hae, please. Why are torturing me like this?"

 

"I'm not. I'm your younger brother,  right?"

 

"How am I supposed to do, hae? So you won't treat me like this?"

 

"Like what? We're family."

 

"You hate me."

 

"I love you." He stare at me disbelief. "Like a BROTHER." I emphasize it.

 

"Okay, dinner is ready. Let's eat, shall we?" Yesung hyung suddenly sitting beside me.

 

"I'm so sleepy, hyung. Bring me my strawberry milk later." He move from his sit. "Enjoy your meal, BABY BROTHER."

 

Yesung hyung look at me then to him. "You guys are really messed up." He sighs.

 

"I know."

 

 

Hyukjae POV

 

"I’m pissed! I am really pissed right now! He pissed me off!! Aaarrgghh!! I hate him! I don't love him anymore! I hate you Lee Donghae!"

 

"I hate you too, hyung." Suddenly, my door opened, revealing him.

 

"What are you doing here?" I hissed.

 

"Bring your strawberry milk." He casually go into my room, put the milk on my bedside table and then sit on my bed.

 

"What are you doing?"

 

"Sit down."

 

"Get out from my room."

 

"Why?"

 

"I don't want you here."

 

"Brothers should be bond."

 

"You really are something, hae."

 

"I am someone, not something."

 

"Fine! Do what you want!"

 

"I will." Without my permission, He pull me down to his lap. Our faces become too close, our eyes met then we stare at each other for so long. He stare at my lip and suddenly his lip ghosting my lip. "I'm sorry. I miss you, so much."

 

He crash my lips, our lips moulding, He my bottom lips asking for entrance. I'm opening my mouth just so He can taste my cavern. I'm beginning to circling my arms around his neck. We deepened the kiss.

 

When the lack of air become so much for us, we separate each other for a second. I stare at his eyes, caressing his cheek, and said "I love you, hae. Please forgive me."

 

"You said that you hate me."

 

"You believed that?"

 

"Of course not, I love you too much." Then He crashed our lips again. He pull me to bed and change our position, He become on top of me. When we kiss, we didn't care about anything, our relationship, our situation, we just need our time alone. The kiss become passionate again, more heat than before.

 

"What are you two doing??!?"

 

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Bad grammar and my update seems not interesting.

Sorry..

 

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