This isn't a double update but it's the quickest I've done in ages. So if you haven't read Chapter 7 yet, go there first before reading this. c: This is also the shortest chapter of Inked. But one of my favorites since, perhaps, chapter 2 lol. Only half-proofread so pls tell me if you find some errors. Enjoy ^^

Donghae had always imagined falling in love to be something quite spectacular.

There would be fireworks. And the world would either become brighter or fade into nothing as it would only be him and his beloved soulmate. He would be the happiest person in the world. Because falling in love is one of the best things that can happen in someone’s life.

He had seen examples of it. His parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles, people on the television all proclaiming what a wonderful feeling it is to be in love.

And Donghae, at fourteen, couldn’t wait for his turn to experience that feeling.

He couldn’t wait to turn eighteen.

But then it happened way earlier than it was supposed to be, in the most unexpected and unimaginable way.

It was just your typical Saturday afternoon. He was sitting on his best friend’s bed and the two of them were talking somberly about their worries of the future. Fear was reflected in Hyukjae’s eyes as they talked about growing up, and Donghae wanted nothing but to hold the older boy against him, take away everything that would make him feel anything less than the happiness he more than deserved.

It was then that he realized he loved Hyukjae.

There weren’t any fireworks. The world did not become brighter nor did it fade away. He didn’t feel like the happiest person on earth.

Instead, Donghae felt as if he was about to fall off a cliff so high he couldn’t see what awaited him in the bottom.

It was a terrifying feeling – one that caused his heart to palpitate in fear and brought so much confusion and anxiety to his still young and naïve mind.

But even then, he was certain of one thing.

It would hurt.

It would hurt because in a world like this, loving someone who isn’t meant for you guarantees just that.

He still loved anyway.

♦

“Well, I – I did like someone. Still do, actually.”

It’s as if someone has just poured cold water on him.

Donghae bites his lip and swallows through the sudden lump in his throat as he turns to look at Hyukjae, who has his gaze fixed ahead.

“You like someone?” the blond asks, and the crack in his own voice makes him clench his fists. A small part of his mind is screaming at him to stop talking, to stop asking, because he knows he isn’t going to like the answer anyway, and yet he couldn’t stop himself from voicing out, “Even if you’re inked? You like someone else?”

“Yeah,” Hyukjae says, and Donghae feels a painful clench in his chest. “For a long time now. Way before my inking. I thought getting inked would make me get back to my senses and forget about it but… that didn’t work.”

His fists are clenched so tightly he could feel his nails digging into his palms and it’s a struggle to keep his lower lip from trembling.

Stop, Donghae tells himself. Don’t ask anymore.

But his mouth opens on its own accord and the words come tumbling out before Donghae could even realize it.

“Who is it? If you don’t mind me asking?”

Hyukjae looks conflicted, almost as if he knows that he would hurt Donghae by giving him an answer. And yet when the redhead turns to meet his gaze, his own fear reflected in his dark eyes, Donghae finds himself wanting to hear it.

When Hyukjae opens his mouth, it’s almost as if time has stilled.

It was a faint whisper.

A single word uttered so softly that it could’ve easily flown with the wind and escaped from curious, listening ears.

But Donghae heard it.

You.

.

.

.

“What…?”

He stares at Hyukjae, heart thumping erratically inside his chest.

It couldn’t be.

He must have heard wrong. It must have been a mistake. Hyukjae must be joking right now. It couldn’t possibly be…

“I love you,” Hyukjae says, eyes glistening with a mix of emotions, and Donghae could only widen his eyes and emit a small gasp. “I always have. A-And because of it, I got so scared for myself that I ended up hurting you. It was selfish. I was selfish. I was stupid and young, and I know it isn’t enough to excuse what I did, and I don’t have any right to ask you for anything but… I’m so sorry, Donghae.”

It’s as if breathing has suddenly become difficult. And the lump in his throat is spreading and growing bigger, and blinking isn’t enough to chase away the prickling in the back of his eyes. Donghae shakes his head slowly and backs away, feeling as if a cold hand has just gripped his heart when hurt flickered on Hyukjae’s face.

“Donghae, please,” the redhead says, reaching out to hold his hands but Donghae has already pulled away. “Please, Hae, I—”

“No—” he blinks furiously but it isn’t enough, and soon, a tear escapes and rolls down his cheek.

Suddenly, everything is coming back to him. The years of hurting and pretending, the time spent and wasted trying to despise someone he could never truly bring himself to hate. The self-loathing and the feeling of being betrayed. The anger. The pain.

All that for this?

It all came back, and as his tears finally surrender themselves to gravity, he pushes Hyukjae away and runs.

♦

If there’s one thing Hyukjae hates about living alone, it’s the fact that it’s always so eerily quiet.

There isn’t anyone watching television. There is no buzz coming from the kitchen.

No voices, no laughter. It’s just him and silence.

Silence that does nothing but pull him into an endless pit of sadness.

He plops down bonelessly on the living room sofa. He feels his chest constricting and his breathing becoming ragged. His eyes are misting and biting his lower lip does not stop it from trembling.

A choked sob escapes his lips.

If there’s one thing Hyukjae likes about living alone, it’s the fact that he could cry out loud and no one would even hear him.

No one would even care.

♦

“I love you, my ,” Donghae mutters darkly as he stares at Hyukjae’s contact details on his phone. “Stupid dip. You think you were the only one in love? You think you were the only one who was afraid of getting hurt? I hate you, you son of a .”

“He’s losing his mind,” Sungmin comments.

“Shut up, don’t be like that to hyungnim!” Ryeowook reprimands, glaring a little before his expression turns gentle. “Hyungnim? Do you want us to come over?”

Donghae ignores his friends’ faces on the screen of his laptop. The three of them are currently engaged in a video chat, but they’ve been at it for three hours now a