When dinner finished, it was already close to twelve in the morning. Most of the members were a little tipsy, including Luhan. We clung to me, using my body as a crutch, as I walked him out to their van parked out back. He muttered things I didn’t quite understand in Chinese and laughed a lot with Sehun who walked on the other side of him.

“I love you, Hee Jin ah.” Luhan turned his head towards me and planted a wet kiss on my temple. I cringed, smelling the alcohol on his breath. We stumbled over to the open doorway to his car as Tao beckoned him in with hooded eyes and a lazy hand, “Luhan ge, come on!”

I pulled Luhan’s hand from my shoulder and turned to him as he swayed over to the car, “I love you too,” I gulped down the small lump in my throat, “Luhan. Goodnight.”

He smiled and waved as he got pulled into the car by the back of his collar. I waved back before he shut the door.

~*~*~*~

The time was twelve thirty in the morning by the time I made it back home. I shut the door, letting out a relieved sigh. Throughout the whole night, it felt as if something heavy bore down on me. It still kind of felt like it was still there. I brushed that thought aside and ruffled my hair. I slipped off my necklace, earrings and shoes. My feet carried me to my room where I threw my accessories on my dresser and accessed the mess on my bed. I gathered the pieces of clothing in my arms and threw them on my chair beside my bed.

“Ugh,” I threw myself down on my bed and stared up at the ceiling fan. 

Tonight was supposed to be a happy reunion for Luhan and I, but it ended up being a night for me to self assess who Luhan was and what he was to me. Whether or not if it was because of his starburst orange hair, I felt like the man sitting next to me wasn’t the Luhan I knew.

I turned to my left where a picture of Luhan and I sat upon my bedside table. In the picture, he had just gotten off stage so he still had his shiny pants and sparkly jacket on. I could even see the shine of sweat on his brow but that didn’t seem to outshine his smile. He had an arm wrapped around my waist while both my arms were wrapped around him. This was two months, after we officially announced our relationship to the members. We looked happy.

I shut my eyes and turned my head away from the photo. That moment felt like a long time ago. I sat up and ruffled my hair, my fingers getting tangled in the wavy mess on my head. I combed through the tangles while walking to the bathroom to get ready for bed. I needed a shower. I also needed to clear my head.

Steam escaped the bathroom the moment I opened the door. The transition from one extreme to the other had my skin prickle. It made me alert, given the time. It was one in the morning but I felt wide awake. I sat on the end of my bed and rung out my hair when I saw my phone screen was blinking. I picked it up to find two awaiting messages, both from Luhan.

I hope you got home safely. Dream about me and I’ll call you in the morning. I love you.

Luhan.

I’m going to come over tomorrow! I have another day off!

Luhan.

I set my phone down without replying and laid down myself.

~*~*~*~*~

Luhan ended up coming earlier than I thought. I wasn’t even awake yet. If it wasn’t for his constant text messages I wouldn’t have known he was standing outside. I jumped out of bed and headed for the door. My hair was a mess, dried up drool was still on the corner of my mouth, and my eyes barely were open.

“Hey Bab—“ Luhan greeted brightly with a bouquet of yellow chrysanthemums in hand but his bright smile turned to laughter when he saw my appearance. I tried to smile and opened the door wider for him as he stepped inside.

“I just woke up. Sorry.” My voice still hoarse I covered my mouth when Luhan chuckled while walking back to me.

“It’s okay. I wasn’t waiting long.” He leaned down to kiss my lips, but I kept my mouth covered and rushed to the bathroom to freshen up. I could hear him laughing at me as he yelled, “I’ll be in the kitchen.”

In the bathroom, I scrubbed my face hard. Ridding it of the drool, and just trying to wake myself up but by the time I finished my face was red. I scrubbed a little too hard. I sighed and knocked my head on the wall with a grunt. Luhan’s never seen me first thing in the morning like this. I wouldn’t be lying if I said I had slapped on the BB cream before he came over to visit me. This time I didn’t have time too and my face was too red to do it now.

“Whatever.” I muttered as I slowly twisted the doorknob and stepped out. Luhan shuffled around in the kitchen by the sound of it. I scooted my way to the entrance and peeked behind the wall to see he was busy getting things from the fridge and setting them out on the counter.

“What are you doing?” I squeaked but even my soft voice had Luhan jump. I chuckled and stepped out from my hiding place while he turned to me, clutching his chest.

“You scared me. I didn’t even hear you come out.” Luhan smiled and opened his arms for me to come into, “Are you awake now?”

I nodded and stepped into his arms that immediately wrapped around me when I was in reach. I hugged him back, giggling, “Are you going to cook?”

He kissed my hair and pulled back to look at me. His lips were pressed together in a thin line as he nodded cutely before puckering up his lips to kiss my forehead, “No. We are going to cook.”

I pulled from his arms and raised a brow, “You know I can’t cook.”

Luhan scrunched up his face in disbelief, “You said you could cook.”

“When did I say that?” I crossed my arms.

“When I was here last time, you said you could make kimchi stew and steamed fish.” Luhan argued back when I shook my head at him and walked out of the kitchen.

“I don’t remember ever saying that. Luhan, if you haven’t noticed, my fridge is empty for a reason. I never cook!”

“That’s not what you said last time.” Luhan muttered when I scoffed, “Luhan, just forget it because I’m telling you now. I. Don’t. Cook.”

I plopped down on the couch and the TV while Luhan stood in between the kitchen and living room. I didn’t pay much attention to him because looking at him and his expression right now made me feel uncomfortable. I flipped through the channels when I noticed he went back into the kitchen. Cabinets were forcefully open and closed. Pans were taken out roughly and jars were slammed on the countertop. I cringed at each sound, but drowned it out by raising the volume on the TV.