Chapter 16

Delusion and Dignity

"Please sit."

Woohyun's words snapped Sunggyu out of his daze as the two had finally sat down. They were still in the coffee shop, the same coffee shop that Sunggyu had been in, but now they had moved tables. Woohyun had chosen a more remote table from the crowd in the shop, more towards the side of the shop by the window. It was more quiet, Sunggyu noted, upon sitting down.

He hadn't gotten a good look at Woohyun before, since he was turned around, but now with Woohyun in front of him, Sunggyu found himself staring at the other man's features. Woohyun donned a fresh pair of black slacks, no doubt expensive, and sleek, black shoes. With a crisp white shirt, rolled up at the sleeves, and that sleek yet soft-looking hair, Sunggyu thought that Woohyun looked absolutely enticing.

Stop it, Sunggyu harshly reminded himself. He's not worth it

"Let's start from the beginning."

Woohyun's words brought Sunggyu's eyes up to his face, and he was finally looking at him. Woohyun had a serious gleam in his eyes, which could easily be classified as determination. Determination for what, however, Sunggyu could only guess.

"The beginning?" Sunggyu asked, cocking an eyebrow. Was there even ever a beginning to talk about between them? "What beginning?"

Woohyun eyed him carefully for a moment. "An apology," His arms still crossed, as he murmured seriously. "Let's start with that."

"No way I'm ever apologizing to you about anything," Sunggyu sneered automatically, instincts hitting back hard. He couldn't help it; it was so habitual that he couldn't control his own words.

Again, that pause as Woohyun looked him over. Sunggyu almost shivered, feeling that gaze sweep over his face, over his shoulders and torso, then back to his face. Woohyun seemed to be calculating him, in thoughts that Sunggyu couldn't even think of predicting. It was almost like a silent battle, but at the same time not. He had barely an idea on how they were going to have a serious conversation, much less what they were going to talk about. Woohyun had proposed them sit down as civil human beings, and Sunggyu had just complied, because... He actually didn't know why. He did it to find out.

"You don't have to apologize," Woohyun finally said, carefully. "I'm the one who is sorry."

"What?" Sunggyu blurted. "Is this a joke?"

Woohyun had a half-hurt look on his face for a millisecond before it was quickly masked over with seriousness. Sunggyu almost felt bad.

"I know that I've been a jerk to you. I know that the way I've been treating you has been unpredictable as lately and I know that you probably hate me. I want to let you know that I never meant for you to hate me." Woohyun sighed, "I'm sorry."

Sunggyu gave a moment to let the words sink in. Woohyun, apologizing and saying sorry? It was almost beyond him. A part of him was still wondering if this were a joke, but the rational side of him told him to give Woohyun another chance. A different part of him chided himself for being so harsh on Nam all the time, running away and back and forth and never actually seeing the man for what he was worth. 

Kim Sunggyu had always lived through life with the judgement that he wasn't Nam Woohyun's type of person. Nam Woohyun, who was priviledged and rich, who got everything handed to him on a silver platter from birth, and a great friend like Hoya to boot, had everything that Kim Sunggyu didn't have. He himself had always worked hard, worked hard to get as far as he was in life, and just the mere thought of some people out there such as Nam having life so easy almost infuriated him. From the moment he saw the man, rich trash was the label he put onto Woohyun and Sunggyu unknowingly set out to hate him for what he was: spoiled rotten. People who have had it so easy in their life; people who never worked, always gained; people who looked down on others who made less than they did. It was those people who Sunggyu would never forgive.

But here Woohyun was, apologizing. He was worth an apology from Woohyun. His pride and dignity told him to throw this apology to the ground, to stomp on it and gloat, to never forgive and always run away from the truth, but now he was at the end of the road. He wasn't going to run away anymore.

Because, although he couldn't give up his pride, Woohyun had definitely put down his own in the open. Maybe Woohyun really was the better man of the two of them.

"I don't want us to be enemies anymore," Woohyun said meaningfully. both hands around his coffee in front of him. "I'm asking seriously now, no jokes. Let's be friends."

Sunggyu took a deep breath. "Why all of the sudden, Nam?"

"What?" Woohyun asked, perplexed.

"This. The apology. Finding me here. Us talking," Sunggyu said, eyes wary. "Why?"

"I've been looking for you."

That had Sunggyu surprised. "Oh?"

"I asked around for where you were," he admitted. "I wanted to find you to talk."

"So here we are," Sunggyu said. He paused, then stated. 

"A lot of things between us have been..." Woohyun waved his hand to gesture, "...questionable, lately, but I'm turning over a new leaf."

"So you say," Sunggyu lifted a suspicious eyebrow. 

"..."

At that moment, Woohyun finally had it. He harshly put his cup down. "Can you stop criticizing whatever I say?"

"I didn't criticize you." But the look in Sunggyu's eye showed that he knew exactly what was going on.

"You're implying it. You're questioning everything that I do, criticizing everything that I say," Woohyun sighed defeatedly. "What gives?"

Sunggyu eyed Woohyun warily. Sighing, he figured that he couldn't escape much from the truth. "It's just the way I am, I guess."

"I'm just trying to be nice," Woohyun slipped a hand through his hair, messing it up a bit. "Can't you let me be nice for once without thinking that I have some ulterior evil motive?"

That caused Sunggyu to stop. Was that what he was doing? Was that what he had always been doing? He can't deny that the feelings that he experienced when around Woohyun had to come from somewhere, so it was just easy to place that blame on the ulterier motives of the man who caused them himself. It was pure logic, but now, as Woohyun finally confronts this growing problem, it's getting hard to deny everything as it was before.

Woohyun was just trying to be nice, Sunggyu reasoned. Good friendly relationships save stress, and it was always better to make friends than enemies. Maybe Woohyun was right (and deep down, Sunggyu knew that he was right) and he really should give him another chance. A real one.

"...Sorry." Sunggyu allowed. It was all he could say at the moment. "It's just habit, I guess."

"Well, kick that habit. It's not a good habit to have."

Sunggyu felt a twinge at that statement. Woohyun was right. He was completely right in this case. But damn, it was so much easier said than done. Having such judgement, such prejudice, was habitual to him now. Like a drug, habits are hard to let go of.

"You think it's something that I can control?" Sunggyu asked frustratedly.

"Yes," Woohyun nodded. "Just be a better person."

"..." Sunggyu's stare at that moment could burn like lasers.

In response, Woohyun closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. "I know. Let's start over."

"What?"

"You can kick that habit." Woohyun sighed, staring at the other man in the eye. "So I'd like to start over. Completely over. From scratch."

"What does that mean?"

"It'll be like we never knew each other before. You'll introduce yourself to me, and I'll introduce myself to you when the time presents itself. Starting the next time I see you after today."

Sunggyu thought about that for a moment. Woohyun was giving him a chance to start over. No truce, no compromise this time, no quick-fixes. It was now a fresh start. Woohyun was giving him this chance in order to help him improve, and for that Sunggyu couldn't refuse. In many ways, Sunggyu was further seeing Woohyun in many different lights.

Sunggyu nodded, "Thank you."

"I have an appointment elsewhere in a bit, so I'll leave now. But next time," Woohyun looked pointedly at Sunggyu. "Fresh start. We'll be friends, and no other feelings, okay? No complications."

Sunggyu gulped, "Okay."

This was for the best. He knew it. Though a part of him felt a little off about this.

"Then, goodbye."

Simple, fast, and nothing personal. Woohyun got up, waved, and left.

It happened so fast, that Sunggyu was left in a daze. The next time he sees him, they were going to start over. Sunggyu urged himself not to be so harsh. He would be easier on Woohyun. And who knows, maybe they could have a better friendship with this new start than last time.

 


A/N: Recently, I watched this TED talk about near-win situations that really connected with me and my writing. I'll finish this story, no matter what. Good ending or bad ending, it'll be completed eventually.  

Actually, I'd like to get some feedback (please?). If you like this story, then why do you like it? If you dislike/kind of dislike this story, then why? 

And optional question, but any ideas on how this story can get better?

I've been having the weirdest relationship with this story, between hating it, just wanting to finish it, not caring about it, and some occasional inspirational spazzes to update it. I like this story because it's easy to write, ridiculous/dramatic (at times), and fun (at times, especially when I pull out of the hat of drama cliches). Things I dislike about this story is the characterization/developement, the update frequency and chapter length(waaaay more horrible than I'd like), and the AU (I so did not plan this universe well enough). 

I'll try to make the rest of the story as best I can, but no promises that it'll be good. It might just grow some smelly mold here and there at the end, but it'll be completed.

 

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safire
I'm the most inconsistent person ever.

Comments

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StrawberrySkye
663 streak #1
juat saw this… starting to read 😁
marieah
#2
Chapter 16: I'VE COME ACROSS THIS 2 LATE.
as much of a rollercoaster as it was 4u, it's nothing close to masterpiece. it may be hard to see, when u've invested good and bad moods into writing it; but it is a wonderfully clicheed story that u turned into a genuine addiction( at least 4 me).
idk where u r at this point in ur life, hopefully safe and living it to the fullest. if it's not a doable deed anymore, it's perfect just up 2 here, nonetheless.
it takes talent to blend such emotions into a 'fairytale' -like story of woogyu. and it's an universe very close to reality
ErioleSama
#3
Chapter 16: Ur simply making sunggyu seems so naive here by always trusting woohyun.lol I cnt believe that he's sincere.just another scheme of him...hate naive sunggyu.jerk woohyun
Persassy
#4
Chapter 3: I LOVE THIS STORY IM LIKE GRINNING LIKE AN IDIOT THROUGH EACH CHAPTERRRRR!
forwoogyu #5
Chapter 16: I do like the story and I look forward for more because I find the push and pull plots so endearing ! so it's so good so far , especially now that there will be a new start and I can see them struggling to keep it simple "no complications'' involved , so yes, it's been gooood imo
thanks ^^
evangeline101 #6
Chapter 16: seriously doubting that woohyun can be genuine but well a new start it is then. i love this story because its developed well and your language is simply amazing. as for frequency of story updates, its totally fine i rarely ever update my stories and there are some that i have given up on so the fact that you're actually finishing this is really incredibly. you're a lot more determined than me i guess.

thanks anyways for updating this i love all the chapters and don't really mind if the ending is ty (doubt anything you write can be ty though).
xinshuang #7
Chapter 16: They are back to square one again? But i dont get it how does Woohyun want to do that ? Is is that easy to dismiss the tension between them?
vince1108 #8
Chapter 16: OMFG WTF BACK ON SCRATCH. well this will be fun... xD
Tally1203
#9
Chapter 16: I'm so glad Woo have made such a good suggestion and my babies will start everything over. I like the story a lot. The way they started their relationship was a harsh one, then how Gyu fell for Woo and apparently Woo felt the same, the moment on the roof was epic, and now when Woo came looking for Gyu. It's so romantic. He'sso Iin loooove and its great. So please, make a good ending ;))
aoiryuki
#10
Chapter 16: Honestly Saf, I really like this story because it has a slow development and you can see Gyu's character in his words and actions. I feel like nowadays people don't really take the time to make a character nowadays. The update frequency is...yeah... but we have lives and being preoccupied isn't a bad thing.

Nam better be serious or else I'm going to punch him.

Thank you for the update you beautiful person♥