Soojung stared into the ceiling. It was clear white with small yellow stars in the roof. The stars were luminous in the night. Soojung had always liked those kinds of stars. For her, it was like looking up into a real starry sky.

Soojung remembers one time, when she and Jongin had been in her room. They had been lying into the bed, speaking about everything between heaven and earth while looking at the small plastic starts. Jongin had started to touch her and he kissed her more passionately. When he was about to remove her shirt, Soojung got scared and pushed him away. She hadn’t been ready yet.

After that, Jongin never tried to have with her again. He probably got hurt by her actions that time. Soojung felt bad because of that but she had always been that kind of girl who never did things when she didn’t want to.

The afternoon a couple of days later had Soojung invited Kris to study some math. Soojung had been slipping behind and she needed help. Sooyeon had been really fast with suggesting Kris as a tutor. It didn’t surprise Soojung at all; Kris seemed to be a smart guy since he was majoring math at university.

They were sitting at the kitchen-table together with the math-book open.

“I don’t understand a thing” Soojung placed her head on the table.

Kris chuckled and gently patted the younger girl’s head. Her hair was feeling softer than he had expected it to feel. “It will do well in the end, I can feel it. It’s probably all the English words”

Soojung shook her head, as much as she appreciated all the help Kris gave her. She just couldn’t agree to what he was saying. She knew that she was retarded when it came to math.

Back in Korea; Sehun had always helped Soojung with the math. He was the only with the patience to help. He had calmly been taking everything step by step and, eventually, Soojung had understood how to count that certain type of equations.

“Let’s take a break” Soojung stood up from the chair faster than Kris had expected. He jumped back in surprise and looked at her with a shocked expression. They had only been studying for fifteen minutes and she wanted a break already.

“Okay” Kris shrugged.

Soojung walked into the kitchen; she poured milk into two glasses and she took a box of chocolate chip cookies and brought it all out to the table.

“Do you need some help?” Kris asked.

Soojung just shook her head and placed the Kris’s glass in front of him. “I’m a big girl”

Soojung winked towards Kris, during the past days she had been feeling a lot more comfortable with Kris. He made her relax and she felt like she didn’t have to pretend to be someone else.

It was just like with Jongin.

~*~*~

There is one time Jongin remembers really well. He had played video-games with Soojung and he let her win, like he always did and she knew that she let him win as well. Soojung had hugged and kissed him. Jongin had fallen back onto the couch and the kiss got more heated. But suddenly, Soojung stopped.

“S-sorry” had she stammered and put her long hair behind her ear. “I’m not ready”

Jongin had nodded disappointed towards Soojung. He knew that she wasn’t ready for the same things that he was. He knew that he was more ready than she was. But he wanted her body so badly.

“It’s okay” had become Jongin’s reply.

Jongin’s life turned into normal after the phone-call with Soojung. He even started with soccer, a game he had stopped doing because he wanted to be able to spend more time with Soojung. He met friends, not only Sehun and Jinri but Kyungsoo and Kyungsoo’s friend Hyeji as well.

Hyeji was a pretty girl with short and almost red hair. Her eyes had a depth he had never seen before and off course, she had a killer-body. But Hyeji didn’t seem to know about how pretty she was.

Mostly, girls who are perfect in every kind of way are also very arrogant. Soojung was the only girl Jongin knew who wasn’t like that. Hyeji wasn’t arrogant as well; she was really nice and smart.

“Do you miss her? Your ex-girlfriend?” Had Hyeji one day asked when she had seen Jongin’s background picture, which was a picture of him together with Soojung.

Jongin nodded “I’m going crazy without her”

Even though Jongin hated that people labeled Soojung as his ‘ex-girlfriend’.