That XX - G-Dragon

I hate all this waiting...

...how dare he

The few days in Tokyo, Mingyu tried to enjoy as far as possible. He had only been to Japan once before, so it was all pretty new to him. Whenever he went somewhere, there weren’t crowds of people recognizing him, only a few every once in a while, so it was rather delightful to finally have some freedom. Also the factor that no cameras were following him around really made his trip quite nice. He wasn’t good at Japanese, so he went everywhere with Wonwoo, but he would have done everything with him anyway. The food in Japan was amazing and Mingyu was worried he would gain too much weight and couldn’t perform anymore as soon as they got to their next city in which they had a concert.

But still, the thought of Jaehwa haunted him. Whenever he saw something she would like or took a picture of something, she would have wanted to see as well and complained a lot about as soon as he came back home, when he unconsciously searched for food she would enjoy on the menu of a restaurant or just lay in bed in the hotel in the evening, as if he was waiting for a call from her; he kept feeling this empty pain inside of him.

Somehow he had reached the last day of their stay though without having been asked many questions about why he may be frowning or why he kept changing his songs.

“You got everything?” Their manager hyung asked, as Mingyu and Wonwoo were standing in front of the room they had shared until then. They nodded, but still he went back in once more to see whether they forgot anything. A few minutes ago he came out again and handed them the card “Seems like this time you didn’t. You can go check out.” He said.

Pulling their suitcases behind them, Mingyu and Wonwoo walked along the corridors and entered the lift together. It took a while for them to get down to the ground floor cause people kept getting on and off and at times it was so crowded, they were barely able to move.

The lobby was a large room with seating everywhere and multiple TV’s on the walls, all showing different programmes, mostly in Japanese of course.

Some of Mingyu and Wonwoo’s bandmates were already waiting in front of them at the desk, so they could check out, so Mingyu drew his attention to one of the screens, on which a celebrity-gossip show seemed to be shown. He recognized a few actors and one or two Korean idols were a theme as well, but since he didn’t understand much it was all nonsense to him.

He then heard a slightly familiar name in the mass of foreign words, but Wonwoo poked his shoulder, wanting to get his attention. Mingyu freed his eyes from the screen to look at this hyung, who looked around nervously for a moment until his eyes focused on something behind Mingyu.

 “Look it’s us!” He said while pointing to a screen on the other side of the room on which you could just barely recognize one of their music videos.

“So? We’ve been on TV quite a lot already. Or do you think all those cameras were just decoration?” Mingyu replied, not really impressed, and wanted to return his attention to the known word he had just heard on the celebrity-gossip show.

“No, no, no! I know that.” Wonwoo hurried and stepped in front of the screen with that programme “But would you have expected to see us on Japanese TV?”

“Just a few days we filmed something for Japanese TV if you remember. You actually did a lot of talking there.” Mingyu was getting annoyed.

“Yes, but they actually show out music videos here! Our Korean music videos!” Wonwoo tried to explain, though his excitement about that seemed a bit feigned.

With a huffy groan Mingyu pushed Wonwoo out of the way, just to see a picture of the person whose name he had heard correctly disappear. It had been Junhong sunbae with an unknown girl. Again. Especially Mingyu’s female friends had been talking about him and his many friendships with girls before and Mingyu had always had a weird feeling about him, whenever he had met up with him. He was one of Jaehwa’s closest friends after all, but the way he looked at her...Mingyu had never liked that. It wasn’t necessarily the worst, it wasn’t a wow I’d you look, but a wow you’re beautiful one, but Mingyu didn’t want that. He only wanted Jaehwa for himself.

Wonwoo tapped him on his shoulder, so he turned to him again and moved forward to the reception desk where now someone had time for them.

It didn’t take long until they were sitting in the van with some of their other bandmembers and driving towards the airport, from which they would be flying to Hong Kong for their next concert the day after. It wasn’t far and there was literally just a handful of fans waiting at the airport to say goodbye to them. Everything was really relaxed and as they had checked in, they still had some time until their plane arrived.

Mingyu took out his tablet PC to make some use of the WiFi. Half heartedly he scrolled though some articles on a website he visited frequently, when he saw his sunbae’s name in a headline again:

Choi Junhong leaving his apartment with an unknown female

Mingyu scrolled a little further to see him in a few pictures, each time with the same girl. The one from earlier was there too and having more time to look at it, he could sort of make out her face, even though she tried to cover it. He felt as if everything stopped for a moment.

It was Jaehwa.

Choi Junhong, member of idol group B.A.P, has been spotted with this girl multiple times recently and after now being spotted in front of his apartment together, it is now more than just rumored the two are in a relationship. A friend of them said the two had been flirty for a long time and now seemed to have taken the next step. Who exactly Junhong’s love interest is, is still unsure.

Mingyu felt as if all the effort he had put into trying to forget about her, the times he had laughed and been happy in the past days had been for nothing. As if a massive wave of sadness and anger and disappointment just washed over him. And he couldn’t do anything about it. He couldn’t move, he couldn’t talk and he couldn’t breathe.

“Mingyu-ah? Is everything okay?” he heard a voice and slowly the silence around him was replaced with the busy sounds of the airport again.

“Mingyu?” A head appeared next to his and like in slow motion, he released his stare from the pictures in the screen and looked to see who it was. His eyes focused on Jisoo, after he blinked away the misty veil that had blurred his view. His hyung was scanning the article in front of him and his expression darkened with each line.

“Oh.” Was all Jisoo was able to say. His hand went up to Mingyu’s shoulder and was carefully it, trying to comfort him “I’m incredibly sorry.”

He tried to smile in response, trying to show it wasn’t that bad, but no matter how hard he tried, only his lower lip would tremble. Rapidly he blinked to get rid of the tears building up in his eyes again.

Jisoo hugged him once before he left Mingyu to himself again.

The announcement that the plane was now ready to broad rung out through the speakers and, a bit stiff, Mingyu made his way to the queue and then towards the plane, where he let himself fall in his seat by the window. After a while the plane started moving and went up high in the sky and a meanwhile familiar pressure was created on Mingyu’s ears. His hearing got worse until all the conversations turned nearly silent, like before.

Silent, everything, but a person crying somewhere on the plane. Crying…Mingyu remembered all the times Jaehwa had been crying because of her new lover. She had always really liked him and sometimes Mingyu had wondered why she had chosen to go out with him and not Junhong. Whenever he had actually showed up at her school and she has had time to talk to him, she would tell all those stories to Mingyu as well with complete fascination in her eyes. And whenever the two of them had been watching something on TV, she would always stop switching through the channels when she saw him somewhere, squeal shortly and then get the biggest smile on her face. Whenever he told her about something before anyone else knew, whenever he showed her new dance moves or played her a new song in advance of the release, she would often call Mingyu as soon as her best friend left, just to tell him, how amazing he was.

Junhong had helped Jaehwa get into TS Entertainment as a dancer and she was forever thankful to him for that, because that’s really all she had wanted in life. To dance. But ever since she had often spent more time with him than with Mingyu, who had been busy due to the growing popularity of SEVENTEEN.

But as Junhong had become busier as well and she hadn’t been part of the dance team to support B.A.P, Jaehwa had gotten more and more sad. Also, as she kept hearing about him being somewhere with other girls or just generals being somewhere and not having asked her to come too, she actually got sort of depressed. She had cried a lot, about how he knew she didn’t like being left alone or knowing he rather spent his time with others. And how she often felt like she was just a second choice and a third wheel when there was someone else with them.

But still, if Mingyu and him have had promotions at the same time and would occasionally see each other on the hallways when recording music programmes, she would keep asking about him and whenever Mingyu told her, he hadn’t asked about her, or been busy talking to another female friend from a girlgroup or the backup dancers, she would start getting mad at him.

He might not have liked Junhong much, but he was still Jaewha's best friend. But how dare he, just taking her away from him in the first available moment.

“Hey? Are you asleep?” Seungcheol asked really loudly close to Mingyu’s ear, to make sure he would hear him.

Mingyu looked back at him and shook his head, “Just not feeling very well.”

“Now Mingyu, you can’t get sick when we still have tons of concerts ahead of us.” His hyung said and pushed his shoulder slightly.

Mingyu saw Doyoon, who sat next to Seungcheol tap his friends lap and then leaning over to him to say something, but Mingyu didn’t really understand everything. He had a bit of a worried look on his face. Seungcheol looked back at Mingyu as Doyoon finished talking with a questioning look on his face, but Mingyu just sent a clueless look back at them.

“Does your mood have something to do with those news about Jaehwa and Junhong?” Seungcheol repeated, this time leaning forward to the youngest of them again. Doyoon hit his leg and looked rather disapprovingly, as if he was disapproving of something Seungcheol had just said.

“No. She’s just been staying at his for a night. It’s all fine.” Mingyu said, lying effortlessly and even being able to put on a smile for his hyungs. They smiled back and then returned back to watching a movie.

Mingyu also felt as if he had to distract himself for a bit and as he looked through Jaehwa’s music for something, that might make him feel better, he stumbled across G-Dragon’s That XX. Jaehwa had gotten the uncensored version of that song somehow and Mingyu had actually started loving it ever since he had gotten rid of the annoying “beep”. He listened to it and felt torn within his emotions. It fit perfectly to how he was feeling which was sort of ironic, but also it made him even more sad. And as he listened to it twice, three times, five, ten, he decided it would be the song he wanted to sing in Hong Kong and knowing Jisoo, he most definitely would. 

AN: So...I have now reached the point of writers' block. Well, sort of. It's not that I don't have ideas, more that I just can't get myself to continue writing. I wrote this chapter about a week ago and since haven't written a single sentence on any of my stories. I'll try my best with continuing to write, but pleaase don't hate me if some chapters in the future may .