Joon walked through the hallway slowly. He had to drag his footsteps through it until he reached Jun Hyung’s room. Every words that came out from the doctor he accidentally met on the main lobby kept repeating inside his head. She left a painful feeling on his stomach, like it’s being kicked.

Yong Jun Hyung ? Yes, he’s been hospitalized here for couple weeks.

We’re relieved that somebody finally visits him. Nobody ever come to see him, you are the first one.

Ever since he got his treatment, Mr. Yong hasn’t talked to anyone. He only replied in short sentence. We’re really worried about him but we couldn’t do anything.

We couldn’t contact anyone because he didn’t give us any numbers. Our first thought maybe he doesn’t have any relatives anymore.

As he spent his time here, Mr. Yong has been through lots of hard time. He had his worst condition once, his priority level has gotten up.

Fortunately, he finally got a donor. He had surgery and got heart transplant three days ago. His condition is pretty weak now, although his body doesn’t reject it, we have to maintain his condition.

We’re hoping for the best.

Joon was standing in front of the door room, finally. He felt nausea yet happy at the same time. He really wanted to meet Jun Hyung, but the image of Jun Hyung laying on his bed strengthless haunted his mind. Joon took a deep breath, pushing the door. He observed the room, while the cardiograph making a beeping sound.

Beside the machine, Joon found the single bed in pale blue sheet. He could see the skinny body figure was sleeping on it peacefully. He walked closer, staring at the skin of Jun Hyung’s back peeking from his patient gown. Joon turned to another side, finally facing the face.

Jun Hyung was in a deep sleep, he’s breathing slowly. His face was swollen because of his weak condition. His fingertips sometimes twitching, maybe he’s dreaming something. Or maybe he felt the pain in his chest.

Joon ruffled his hair, he almost couldn’t hold his tears. He grabbed the closest chair on his side, lifting it in one hand so he didn’t wake Jun Hyung up. He brought himself closer to the bed side, grabbing Jun Hyung’s opened palms and holding it closer to his chest.

His other free hand started Jun Hyung’s temple. Joon rubbed Jun Hyung’s arm gently. Words started running inside his mind, forcing Joon to speak. But he couldn’t find perfect words to say, only tears ran through his cheeks. Joon looked down, hiding his face inside his palm that his love second ago. His shoulders started shaking.

Jun Hyung-ah, why we end up like this ?

“Hyung ?”

Joon lifted his face. He looked at Jun Hyung who’s blinking his eyes. The weak voice addressed him together with his surprised face.

“Am I too noisy ?” Joon wiped his tears. “Sorry I woke you up.”

Jun Hyung freezed, he looked confused. He reached out and touched Joon’s face, “Is this really you ?”

“It’s me,” Joon forced a smile on his face, grabbing Jun Hyung’s arm. “I’m here now, I’ve found you and I’m not going anywhere.”

Their memories suddenly started flashing in Jun Hyung’s mind. They were all moving rapidly like a slide show. All the bad and the worse things, all the good and memorable time. He stopped reminiscing when Joon suddenly held his palms tighter. Joon moved forward, their faces were close to each other.

“Yong Jun Hyung,” Joon said, “i love you.”

Jun Hyung didn’t hold back himself anymore. He reached out and pulled Joon’s head to his side so he could land a kiss on his lips. Joon replied by kissing him back passionately. “This situation is so not ideal,” Jun Hyung whispered between their kisses.

“Who cares ? I’m here now,” Joon replied. He crawled up to bed after taking off his shoes, he put his arms around Jun Hyung’s body. He pulled Jun Hyung closer to his side like he’s scared that Jun Hyung would disappear again.

“Hyung, you’re hugging me too tight...” Jun Hyung gasped.

“Ah, I’m sorry,” Joon loosened himself so Jun Hyung could breathe. He kissed Jun Hyung’s forehead before they finally closed their eyes, “Now sleep.”

*

Seung Ho immediately visited the hospital few days after Joon finally called him.

I finally found Jun Hyung, but it seems he’s not okay. Hyung, I’m really worried.

As the leader of the group, Seung Ho has responsibility to take care of s whenever they need him. If he could say the truth about Joon and Jun Hyung’s situation, he wanted to give up so many times. So many pressure from the media and his colleagues, asking what really happened. Sooner or later, Seung Ho knew he couldn’t hold back all the questions. But for now, he had to protect Joon no matter what.

When he finally arrived at the hospital, he rushed to the emergency room area where Joon told him on the phone. Right after he turned left, he saw Joon was sitting on the seat. His palms covering his face, while Jun Hyung’s mother was standing on the other side with her husband. Seung Ho bowed to them to show his politeness, but he ran to Joon’s side. Seung Ho gently patted his shoulder, “How is it ?”

Joon who felt relieved that Seung Ho finally there moved his body backward, blowing air from his mouth. “Not good, he collapsed again this morning. The transplant doesn’t work.”

“Is it really that bad ?”

“YES, HYUNG ! What did you expect ?! His heart stopped this morning !!! Why the heart stopped working ?!” Joon couldn’t hold his patient anymore. He didn’t mean to yell at Seung Ho, but nobody could blame him for his reaction. “Hyung, I’m sorry...I didn’t mean to...”

“That’s okay, I understand,” Seung Ho, for the first time in his life, wanted to protect someone so bad. He had known Joon since their training days. He spent lots of time with Joon who mostly hid himself behind his smile. And all the strength he had was crumbled in front of Seung Ho’s eyes, when Joon finally met someone he loved so much.

Seung Ho unintentionally grabbed Joon’s opened palm. He linked his fingers tightly, hoping that he could help him to calm down. Seung Ho knew that Joon needed it.

The day suddenly turned into night, when the ER’s door finally opened. Joon who stayed awake got up from his seat and attacked the doctor with questions, “How is he ? Is he okay ? You didn’t kill him, right ?”

Seung Ho who felt asleep on the seat, rubbing his eyes when he noticed the doctor was leading Joon and Jun Hyung’s parents to another corner. From their faces and Joon’s reaction, he knew something bad happened. Joon could only look down to the floor. He refused to stay calm as he started yelling at the doctor.

Seung Ho took steps forward and grabbed Joon’s arms. He shrugged Seung Ho several times, the tears started falling down on his cheeks, “What kind of excuse is that ? You already gave him a new heart ! You said it will work, but now his body just getting weaker !! What do you mean the time will tell !? Stop playing with people’s life !!”

“Joon-ah, get a grip !” Seung Ho pulled Joon away from the doctor. He worried Joon would blow his fist to the doctor’s face. Seung Ho had to grab his waist to drag him away from the alley. “Don’t act like this !”

“Let me go !!” Joon pushed Seung Ho’s away from his body. His leader hit the wall hardly, but Joon didn’t care. He walked away and left the building.

It’s all useless.

-

 (...what's the end for us ?... )