Author: wookiebear

Pairing: Kyuwook

Song: "Never Gonna Leave This Bed"- Maroon 5

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"Are you okay?"

I looked up at Leeteuk and smiled tiredly.  I nodded, doing my best to assure my hyung that everything was fine.  He sent me a look and I knew he wasn't buying my act.

"Then why have you been locked in your room for the last five days Kyu?"

The strained smile left my lips, replaced with a fierce scowl.

"Just leave me alone, please.  I really don't want to talk"

I glared at my leader, daring him to push the subject.  He hesitated before sighing and standing up to leave.

"Fine, you don't have to tell me, but I'd appreciate it if you would at least make an effort to get up.  The managers are going to get really pissed if they have to keep cacelling your schedules.  They have been lenient because they know you get sick easily, but this is really starting to push things"

"Whatever" I muttered, turning so my back was facing my hyung.

I waited until I heard his footsteps and the closing of the door.  Once I was sure I was alone I sat up and rubbed my face in frustration. 

I knew things were getting out of hand, worst yet, I knew I was starting to spin out of control.  I lied.  I wanted to talk about it, I was dying to tell someone, anyone about what I was feeling.  The thing that killed me was the person I usually turned to in these situations was the reason why I was so lost.

I was trying to hold everything together, I really was, but I could feel myself unravelling at the seams.  How was I supposed to handle this?  It was impossible.  I had never felt so alone.

I buried my face in my hands and tried to steady my breathing.  It was too much.  Everything was spinning out of control and I couldn't deal.

I cursed softly, my hands ripping through my hair.  Why?  Why did he need to shift my world?  Why did he need to change things?  Why did he have to make our effortless relationship complicated?

Why did Ryeowook speak the words that should have remained unspoken?

"Kyu-ah?"

"Yeah Wookie?"

"I know this is wrong, and I know I shouldn't feel like this, but I can't help it.  It's tearing me apart Kyu... it hurts..."

"What's wrong?!  Tell me"

"...P-promise you won't hate me?"

"You're my best friend, I could never hate you.  So please just tell me, you're scaring me"

"I'm s-sorry..."

"Wookie?"

"I'm sorry... I-I think I l-love you..."

I bit back a scream as the memory flashed through my head for what seemed like the millionth time.  I hated him.  I hated him for screwing everything up.  I hated him for telling me how he felt.  I hated him because that wasn't something he could take back, it wasn't something I could ignore.

I hated him because now that he had said it aloud, it became real.

He was a man.  This was wrong, every cell in my brain told me that it was wrong, horribly and sickeningly wrong.  Everything I believed in, everything I knew told me that it was unforgiveable.  A sin that could never be eradicated, a spot on my eternal soul that could never be removed.

I knew all this.  I knew just how wrong and immoral and evil it was.  I knew how disgusting it was to be loved by another man.

I knew, but that didn't help me understand.  It didn't help me understand why my heart beat louder everytime he was near.  It didn't help me understand why his smile took my breath away, or help me understand why I wanted to hold him endlessly when he cried.  It didn't help me understand why he constantly dominated my thoughts.  It didn't help me understand why I felt my heart swell when the word "love" fell from his lips.

When I lifted my head from my hands I realized how dark it was.  I glanced at the clock beside my bed and the glowing green lights read 12:48.  I sighed, it was late but I knew sleep would never meet me.

My head snapped up when I heard the soft click of my door opening.  My eyes widened and I felt my heart accelerate when I saw who entered.

"R-ryeowook?" I whispered in disbelief. 

I watched him as he silently closed the door and slowly made his way towards my bed.  I backed away from him, a purely instinctive movement.  He stopped a few feet away and I could just make out his face in the dim light from the streetlamp that shone through the window.

He looked tired and his eyes were red and puffy.  He had been crying.

"Wook~" I started, but he cut me off.

"I'm s-sorry Kyu.  I didn't m-mean what I said, I p-promise.  Please, let's just forget what h-happened.  Let's just go b-back to the way we were.  Please, I'll do anything.  P-please, just d-don't l-leave me Kyu.  I c-can't... I need you..."

Tears welled up in his eyes and he blinked rapidly, trying to stop them from falling.

"P-please" he whispered.

As I watched him fall apart before me, I felt my last walls crash down.

"Come here" I ordered, opening my arms for him.

He looked at me and he let out a choked laugh.  He came towards me and I wrapped him in my arms.  He began to shake and I felt my shoulder grow damp with his tears.

Just this was enough.  I no longer felt like the room was closing in on me and I could finally breathe.  The oppressive weight on my chest was lifted and I heard my heart pound in my ears, reminding me that I was still alive.  I pulled him closer, letting his presence wash away all the lonliness and all the frustration.

"Ryeowook" I finally whispered.

He slowly looked up at me, obvious fear present in his eyes.  I smiled slightly and used my thumb to swipe a stray tear that painted his cheek.

He was beautiful, so hauntingly beautiful.  So perfect in every way, so luminous and warm that it almost hurt to look at him.  I stared at him and I caved.  I fell into the feelings I had done my best to repress.

His lips were warm and sinfully sweet.  I kissed him and I didn't think of the consequences or the morality of my actions.  All I could process was how right it felt, how seamlessly we fit togther.

When we pulled away, I finally realized what I had done.  I realized it, but I couldn't bring myself to regret it.

Ryeowook stared up at me, his eyes wide with shock.  His eyes were guarded, but I could still make out the little flickers of hope that flashed through.

"W-what does this mean?" he asked quietly, like he was scared to hear the answer.

"I don't know" I answered, "I honestly d-don't know what is going on, and I don't know why this is h-happening.  All I know is that I n-need you too.  I c-can't.... I just really need y-you"

He looked deep into my eyes and he nodded, smiling ever so slightly.  I laid down, making him lay beside me.  My arms enveloped his waist and it felt so natural, so right.

"Stay with me tonight" I whispered in his ear, tightening my hold on him.

He didn't answer, but he snuggled into my chest.

I kissed the top of his head, never wanting to leave.  In this room, sheltered from all the hate and judgement I was free.  This bed was my own world.  A world where I could love without fear.  A world where love was unconditional and pure.  A world where I could love Kim Ryeowook and where Kim Ryeowook could love me.

This bed was a world where love could never be a sin.

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I finished my first one shot!

I laughed when this song popped up.  I have like over 400 kpop songs and I only have like 16 English songs and I thought it was funny that I got one of the few.

Anyway, hope you like this, I'm pretty sure the Kyuwook shippers will be pleased!