part 11. being with you

When he was younger, Donghae thought he already knew everything there is to know about Lee Hyukjae. After over a decade of being best friends, he thinks it’s simply impossible for him not to. He knows Hyukjae’s weird habits, the things that would tick Hyukjae off, how he sounds really different and slightly scary when he’s angry, the kinds of food he would pick off of his plate. He knows the songs Hyukjae likes to listen to and sing inside the shower, his fear of insects and bugs, the stories behind his scars, his opinions and thoughts on various things ranging from serious topics like politics, war, and religion, down to the more lighthearted ones such as sports, celebrities, and even silly cartoons. Those are just some of the many things he already knows about Hyukjae.

However, as he goes through his first ever experience of a romantic relationship, Donghae realizes that there are so much more to discover about his best friend. It’s that part of Hyukjae that he could only dub as ‘the boyfriend side’ in his mind – the side of him that Donghae would have probably never seen if it weren’t for them becoming a couple.

One of the very first things Donghae learned upon getting into a relationship with his best friend is how utterly wonderful Hyukjae’s lips are, and how perfect they feel when they are pressed against his own. They are deliciously plump – a total opposite from Donghae’s thin ones, and while he likes watching those lips sometimes when Hyukjae is talking or eating, he very much enjoys it too when they’re busily kissing him. Hyukjae’s lips (and tongue) are quite talented, not only with the way they move on Donghae’s mouth, but also with how they brush against delicate parts of his skin. He must say he has developed an unhealthy obsession with kissing those gorgeous lips, as well as an addiction to the feel of them on his skin.

And he could also say quite confidently that Hyukjae shares the same sentiments.

“Hyukjae,” Donghae sighs for the nth time as his boyfriend peppers soft kisses onto his neck, all the while pulling him close from behind, his strong arms wrapped around Donghae’s stomach.

They are sitting on Donghae’s bed, in his small studio apartment in Incheon. Donghae is busy working on a paper on his laptop while he sits between Hyukjae’s legs, the latter trying to distract him, which is nothing new.

Frankly, Donghae is quite impressed with how quickly they adapted to this new dynamic. After the first, second, and third kiss on the deck of a tower in Busan, Donghae was quick to blush and hide his face into Hyukjae’s shoulder, causing his newly-acquired boyfriend to laugh adoringly at his endearingly shy behavior. He didn’t know what to do – it was his first kiss, and it happened with Hyukjae, and it felt really, really nice. His heart was practically hammering against his chest and if it wasn’t for Hyukjae gently prying him off, he would’ve never lifted his face up from his shoulder in utter bashfulness.

But of course, Hyukjae was very eager to help. Over a dozen kisses later, and Donghae eventually got over the shyness and even learned to initiate the kisses himself.

And now, three months into dating, kissing is no longer anything new (although it still causes the same sensations as it did the first time.)

“Hyukjae,” Donghae whines again as he feels his boyfriend’s arms tighten around his torso, his lips still busily pecking softly on the smooth skin on Donghae’s neck. “Hyuk, I’m trying to work on a paper here.”

“Mm?” Hyukjae hums into his skin, teasingly nibbling on the creamy white expanse as he smirks playfully. “Just focus on your paper and I’ll do my own thing here. Don’t mind me.”

“You’re distracting me,” Donghae groans exasperatedly, his eyes fluttering close as he allows himself to melt into Hyukjae’s hold for a moment, a pleased sigh unknowingly escaping his lips. “I-I need to finish this by tomorrow.”

“Cramming isn’t that bad,” Hyukjae utters, his lips traveling upwards to the space behind Donghae’s ear. “I haven’t seen you in almost four days. Are you really just gonna work on this and ignore me until I go back to Seoul tomorrow?”

He could hear the pout in that voice, and Donghae could only exhale audibly, feeling slight annoyance eating at his nerves – mostly because Hyukjae has once again used his persuasive skills successfully on him. He turns on his seat, glaring at his boyfriend who is grinning stupidly at him before he grumbles, “You ing .”

And then he kisses the living daylights out of him.

*

On their fifth month, Hyukjae demands something from Donghae that makes him realize just how much of an actual cheese ball his boyfriend is. Although Donghae isn’t sure whether this discovery makes him want to coo in adoration or punch Hyukjae in the face. Probably both.

“Come on, you can do this.”

Donghae frowns, glaring holes into Hyukjae’s face as he tries again. “B-B… Ba- Bab- , I can’t!”

“Oh please, Hae,” Hyukjae rolls his eyes. “It can’t be that hard. Just say it once. Baby. Call me baby.”

“B-Ba– Ah, I don’t want to!” Donghae whines, his face flushing slightly. “Why do we need pet names like these? Rafiki is just fine for you.”

Hyukjae scowls at him, his arms crossing over his chest. “What kind of boyfriend are you? You don’t want honey, or sweetheart, or darling, or baby, you want Ursula and Rafiki instead?”

“It’s because they’re unnecessary! Why the need for pet names when you can just call me Donghae and I’ll call you Hyukjae,” Donghae mutters, mimicking his boyfriend’s pose.

Hyukjae makes a face, annoyed as he shoves Donghae’s shoulder lightly. “You know what? Fine! Don’t use pet names for all I care! I won’t stop calling you baby anyway until you get sick of it!”

He huffs and stomps away, ignoring his boyfriend who is pouting and furrowing his eyebrows in mild exasperation. It isn’t until thirty minutes later that the frown eases off Hyukjae’s lips when Donghae hugs him from behind and buries his face into his shoulder.

“Stop ignoring me,” Donghae utters meekly, his voice turning smaller as he says, “Baby.”

He giggles like a hyena high on drugs after that. And then Donghae smacks the back of his head with a palm and he shuts up.

*

An amusing fact that Hyukjae learns about Donghae on their seventh month as a couple is that his boyfriend can actually be rather possessive and easily jealous as well. When they went to Busan, Hyukjae has shown him how much of a childish immature brat he could be when he’s jealous, and truthfully, while he does feel a little bad about it, he doesn’t think he has to do anything to fix his attitude.

Donghae is his. The boy himself said so, and no one can just go around and check him out or flirt with him, especially when Hyukjae is around.

Apparently, he isn’t the only one who thinks that way.

“Well if you weren’t flirting back with her then she wouldn’t have done that!” Donghae exclaims in great annoyance as he stomps into Hyukjae’s apartment, an exasperated redhead following after him.

“I wasn’t flirting back!” he argues, shutting the front door behind him. “How many times do I have to tell you that? I didn’t even know she was trying to flirt until she gave me the paper with her number!”

Donghae turns to look at him, his eyes narrowed and lips curled into a snarl as he points accusingly at his boyfriend. “How the hell do you react so quickly when people simply glance at me, but when they practically purr and bat eyelashes at you, you tell me you didn’t know they were flirting and you just smile back at them! You’re ing stupid – no, don’t you dare come near me! You sleep on the couch tonight!”

And Hyukjae slumps pathetically against the wall as the door to his bedroom closes with a loud bang. Great. Locked out of my own room.

Two hours later, when he has finally given up on knocking on his bedroom door and whining at his boyfriend, he feels someone crawl into the couch next to him, a warm frame snuggling into his shoulder and a blanket being tossed over his figure. Although his mind is hazed by sleep, Hyukjae manages a small smile as he turns and pulls Donghae close, wrapping his arms around him and pecking him gently on the forehead.

Despite the cramped space and his feet hanging off the armrest, Hyukjae sleeps well that night.

*

The sad part about being separated by cities is that seeing each other truly requires more time and effort. As they hit their ninth month as a couple, they also become busier with university. Hyukjae realizes then that time, sadly, is not something that they can have full control over.

Donghae starts his internship and Hyukjae begins with his thesis paper, and they become so cramped up with work that they couldn’t visit one another so often anymore. Even the phone calls are cut short because the only time they have to themselves is the few minutes before they hit the sack, and even then, they are too exhausted to stay awake and talk.

Hyukjae is okay though – because despite everything, he still hears Donghae’s voice, even if the latter stops making sense halfway through their phone calls.

“Mm?” Donghae hums questioningly, that familiar tiredness lacing his tone as he mumbles, “Sorry, I didn’t hear… My eyes closed… and then when they opened again, I didn’t understand what you were talking about anymore.”

Hyukjae chuckles, feeling his own eyelids growing heavier as well while he cradles his phone between his ear and his pillow. “S’okay, baby. To be honest, I don’t know what I was saying anymore either.”

He hears Donghae laugh lightly, and Hyukjae couldn’t help but imagine a cute small grin plastered on his sleepy face. “Think we should sleep?”

“Yeah,” Hyukjae utters, allowing his eyes to flutter close as he rolls into a more comfortable position on the bed. “I’m so tired. And you are too. But I still want to talk to you anyway.”

“Me too,” Donghae says, yawning at the end of his short sentence. Hyukjae hears shuffling movements and assumes that his boyfriend has gotten more comfortable on his bed as well. “I just want to hear you talk ‘til I fall asleep.”

“Same.”

“Same.”

“Hae? Baby?”

“Mm?”

“I love you.”

He hears a quiet chuckle, and the words come out slowly in a slurred manner, “Love you too.”

Hyukja