The charity event was tonight yet Sung-hee couldn’t bring herself to be excited or nervous for that matter.  Over the past week and a half she had grown numb to everything, fans didn’t even bother her she was too focused on making sure he didn’t interact with her.  Everywhere he followed her she would leave and just when she thought she lost him he’d appear out of nowhere.  Thankfully he still hadn’t found out where her apartment was since she had taken to going in the back way.  Hyo didn’t want to be passive about it though, he wanted to come out with guns blazing but Sung-hee demanded they kept everything silent until after fans calmed down.  She certainly wasn’t in the mood to deal with two media drenched issues at the same time. 

At the moment she was far too preoccupied with something of much greater importance.  “I don’t ing know what to draw!”  The roar vibrated against the apartment walls as she threw her sketch book across the room.  When the book landed against the wall with a thud she felt a little better but still huffed irritably and fell back into the couch grumbling.  This was worse than her two year block.  She wanted to draw, more than anything she wanted to draw, but she just couldn’t figure out what it was she wanted.  “Damn pencil why can’t you draw on your own?”  She hissed towards the pencil that had fallen on the floor and angrily kicked it away before falling onto her side on the couch and sighed heavily.

A part of her felt that it wouldn’t be fair to try and talk to Delphine’s uncle when she hadn’t even drawn a line in nearly two weeks.  Sure that didn’t seem like a long time but when the WAI asked her to keep a steady flow of work she felt like a cheater.  Delphine hadn’t been much help in the matter either, “You’re just pushing too hard relax maybe you need to get laid.”  Her crude explanation of it, while tempting, wouldn’t solve Sung-hee’s problems and she knew that.  She knew it and she hated it. 

Add in that she was still upset with that fan girl for interrupting her rather pleasant afternoon and Sung-hee felt like she was suffering from her monthly gift’s mood swings without the bleeding.  An unhappy moan parted her lips and she pouted while kicked at the innocent coffee table.  “Umma this is where I need you.  You always knew the right things to say to make it better.”  Granted Sung-hee was younger at the time, but, from what her grandmother had told her, as she got older her mother would have been the perfect help to her, almost like a best friend. 

Just remember sweetie it’s like getting a variety bag of candy, some candy taste good others not so much.  It’s up to you if you want to keep eating the bad candy or fish around for the good stuff. 

As a child her mother’s explanation of things would make her giggle and she’s mother for her silly references but now Sung-hee had learned how right her mother was.  While her little motto still made her laugh she understood it better and on some level she knew that was her mom’s goal; make Sung-hee laugh but grow from her wisdom as well.  “Seemed easier to fish through the candy bag when I was younger.”  Suddenly she shot up from her spot on the couch, “That’s it!”  Her eyes scanned for the pencil that had stopped under the coffee table.  Without thinking she shot down and bumped her head on the surface of the table but still managed to get the pencil in her firm grasp.  “Stupid low table.”  Sung-hee didn’t waste too much time on it; instead she crawled over to the sketch book.

Quickly her pencil flew across the page as she started to draw a bag of candy, opened and spilled out slightly onto the table.  Each piece of candy had a word on it such as regret, love, happiness, sadness and the like.  Actually it would be more accurate to call the drawing a bunch of boxes but that was all that matter she had to get this down before the urge left her.  Just as she started to put the bag into shape a frantic knocking on her door startled her. 

She jumped slid her pencil over the length of the page leaving a dark mark and broke the tip with a snap.  Eyes wide she resisted the urge to yell and pitch a fit unsuccessfully.  She grabbed the nearest pillow and screamed as loud as she could into it before the knocking at the door returned.  Head snapping up she stomped over to the door ready to give whoever it was a piece of her mind.  Pausing for a moment she looked through the peak hole to find her neighbor from a few doors down.  An older woman who lived alone as a widow, her constant shifting and looked around nervously melted all the anger out of Sung-hee.  Just as she was about to knock Sung-hee opened the door, “Mrs. Lee what a surprise.”

She gave Sung-hee a small smile as the young girl gestured her to come inside and after a moment of hesitation she did so.  The usual formalities were observed and Sung-hee led her to the couch to while flipping the sketch book over.  “I’m sorry to come unannounced like this.” 

Sung-hee shook her head, “Don’t worry I love your visits.  I’m sorry I haven’t been able to come over as much as before.”  When Sung-hee first moved into the building a few weeks ago Mrs. Lee came by almost every other day to check up on her and Sung-hee returned the favor every now and then.  She then stood and excused herself to get the two some tea.  “So how have you been?”  Sung-hee called from her spot over in the kitchen waiting for the water to boil. 

“I’ve been good the store is getting a lot of good business now.  What about you honey?”  Mrs. Lee had run a store with her husband before he died and now she was the sole owner.  Sung-hee had gone there a few times for groceries but not as often as she could. 

Mrs. Lee had no idea about the music scene, most of what she listened to was old artists, and she refused to watch too much TV, to her it rot your brain.  So of course she only knew the basics of what Sung-hee had explained to her over the past few weeks.  Sung-hee liked it that way though, explaining everything to an unbiased person.  “I’ve been better but I’ve certainly been worse.”  After the water came to a boil she pulled out two cups and tea bags.  “Things have gotten better over the past couple of weeks actually I think they’ll keep getting better.”  Carefully she poured the water and carried the two cups by their handles over giving Mrs. Lee a small smile. 

“Thank you dear,” She motioned for Sung-hee to sit, “I hate wasting a visit on something as odd as this but I felt that I had to tell you.”  At this Sung-hee felt a chill go down her spine, “There was a man that came to my door asking for you.”  Sung-hee nearly dropped the tea cup, her jaw dropped, her eyes widened and she felt as if she was going to cry.  Has he figured out I’m on this floor already?  “I guess he was a reporter or something but I’ve seen him hanging around here in the lobby before.”  Mrs. Lee seemed to spot how uncomfortable Sung-hee felt and placed her hand on her knee trying to reach out to the much younger girl.

“Wh-what did you tell him?”  The words nearly stuck in as she tried to remain as calm as possible though she felt cold as ice.  He really had been that close to her apartment and it wasn’t as scary as having Lee close by but it was close enough.  What she didn’t understand was what he wanted.  Why now after all this time?

Mrs. Lee shook her head and patted Sung-hee’s leg before taking a sip of her tea.  “I told him that he must have the wrong building because I’ve never seen anyone by that description around here before and that I had lived here a long time so I would know.”  If hugging the older woman wouldn’t arouse any suspicious Sung-hee would have done it in a heartbeat.  While it wouldn’t keep him away for long at the very least the lie would deter him for a bit. 

Sung-hee didn’t have to force the smile this time as she started to drink her tea savoring the flavor and the feeling of calm nerves.  “Thank you you’re a life saver.” 

“What do you think he’s after anyway?”

Hell if I know I just want him gone.  Why can’t he take the hint that he shouldn’t be around here?

Sung-hee waved her hand absentmindedly and gave Mrs. Lee a reassuring smile, “What every other reporter is looking for, the next big scoop to bring them to the top what else?”  Although the luster and lure of Sung-hee and Thunder’s relationship had faded greatly the older woman didn’t know that and it provided the perfect excuse.  “I wouldn’t worry about it too much he’ll give up sooner or later they all do.”  He better give up or it’s back to the courts again and I’m not so sure I’m ready to relieve all that again.  You’re going to have to it up though.  Ha fat chance I don’t have to do anything!  Okay who’s acting like their a five year old now? 

Pleasant conversation was held up between the two on various matters from Mrs. Lee’s time at the store to Sung-hee’s attendance of the charity event going on that night.  Mostly though Sung-hee talked about Thunder.  How much she missed him and how hard it was sometimes not being able to see him when all she wanted was to just lay in his arms.  The smile on the older woman’s face was comforting but there was something behind her eyes that drew Sung-hee’s attention.  Almost like she was about to tell a story that she hadn’t told before or at the very least in a long time. 

“You know I know how you feel.  When Kibum was in the army I thought I would go crazy without him there.  There were so many times I wanted to write him and tell him I couldn’t wait any longer.”  She took a long drink of her tea, finishing the cup off and placed it on the table her eyes glazed over as she seemed to think about the past. 

Sung-hee had heard the story of how the older couple had been childhood friends turned lovers in high school and while she thought they were a rare case; a part of her always hoped that neither of them ever doubted their love for one another.  “You didn’t do it though, right?”  Sung-hee’s voice was more worried than curious and her tone earned her a small smile.

“Yes I did actually.  I wrote a nice long letter about all my feelings and how upset I was.”  With those words the younger girl’s heart broke and the picture of the perfect couple shattered.  But wait just a minute they’re still together right?  So did they really break up or did he win her back?  Did she regret it at all?  Just as Sung-hee opened to ask all these questions and more Mrs. Lee held up her hand signaling for her to stay quiet.  “But I didn’t send it I could imagine breaking his heart like that and I realized right after I wrote it that I couldn’t imagine my life without him.  Actually that’s wrong I could imagine life without him but I couldn’t imagine a happy life without him.  So what did I do?  I threw that letter into the fire and waited for that last year when he could finally come home.”  The glint in her eyes was familiar; Sung-hee had seen it in Thunder’s a hundred times.  She still loved her husband even after his death.

Sung-hee sort of understood what she was trying to say to her but at the same time she couldn’t, the situations were different.  Mr. Lee wasn’t able to see her husband because he was away in the army while Sung-hee had him right there but he had his job to do and she wasn’t going to take that away from him, he loved it after all.  So maybe in a weird way it did relate to the story.  Silence engulfed the two as Sung-hee finished her tea off as well with a satisfied sigh.  Finally she looked back into the other woman’s eyes and saw exactly what Mrs. Lee wanted.  With a little pout Sung-hee tried to imagine for a moment her life without Thunder in it, even thinking about it broke her heart and the beginnings of tears formed in her eyes.

“And that’s exactly how I felt Sung-hee.”  She sighed, “Now you listen to me there aren’t many boys in this world that can make you feel that and I know it’s hard to wait for the uncertainty to be over but trust me when it’s over,” she smiled sweetly, “it’s the most amazing feeling in the world.  You remember that Sung-hee, you remember that or this old woman might have to smack some sense into you.  Understand?”

She nodded, “Completely.”

Mrs. Lee tapped her knees a few times before standing with a small sigh and turned back to Sung-hee.  “Now I suppose you have that charity event to get ready for yes?”

In all honesty Sung-hee had completely forgotten about the charity ball she was too absorbed in her own thoughts about Thunder and if she really could have a future with him.  Blinking a few times it finally dawned on her when Mrs. Lee gave her a rather confused look.  “Oh right yeah I’m heading over to my friend Delphine’s place in a little bit she’s going to do my hair and nails.”  Apparently Delphine’s mother owned a beauty salon and for the better part of four years Delphine worked there to help pay her way through college.

“Ah I see.  Do you mind accompanying this old lady back to her apartment?  It feels odd to part this way when you’re just a few doors down from me.”  She suggested with a smile offering her arm to Sung-hee.  The young girl pretended to think about it for a minute before smiling in return and looping arms with the older woman.  Slowly they walked in a comfortable and peaceful silence seven doors down and with a final hug parted ways.  It was amazing to Sung-hee what a simple talk with the more experienced woman could do for her worries that she hadn’t even allowed to truly blossom yet.  Shaking her head Sung-hee ran her fingers across the wall as she walked back to the apartment humming a little bit.  No longer was she concerned with unwanted guests though her heart still ached to see her boy.

~~~~~~

By the time that Delphine and Sung-hee arrived at the party everything was in full swing.  The usual toast to the charity hadn’t happened yet but all the important guests had arrived and most pleasantries had been exchanged.  Just the way the two wanted it.  As soon as they arrived they were met with a male about two inches taller than Sung-hee in a tux with the jacket open and a smile on his face.  Delphine greeted him first with a hug like they had known each other for years.  Come to find out they had.  Thus young boy was Zhong, a Chinese boy that had been Delphine’s neighbor and friend for years before she moved to Korea.  He was sweet but Sung-hee felt rather awkward.  Especially when his rather attractive sister Iva came over she shifted around uncomfortably trying to keep the conversation going on her part especially when Delphine disappeared to find her uncle. 

“So how long have you known Delly?” 

Delly?  Sung-hee felt her eye twitch and she bit back the rude comment she wanted to say knowing that these people were Delphine’s friends though she was certain that Delphine wouldn’t have liked the nick name either.  “Oh just a couple of months but we’ve gotten really close in that time.”  Iva didn’t look too pleased at that, most likely because Delphine had been her close friend before.  Or at least that’s what Sung-hee figured. 

“Oh that’s good do you have any works in museums like Delphine?”  Sung-hee’s pleasant expression was completely destroyed as she looked at Iva who, though she smiled, looked quite pleased with herself.  Zhong looked at her in disbelief and Sung-hee figured out right there that Iva wasn’t exactly part of the group of friends that Delphine particularly enjoyed. 

“Iva!”

“What?”  She turned her innocent gaze to her brother who was looking at her with a ‘what the hell is your problem’ expression but no matter how fierce his look turned she just smiled back at him innocently. 

Sung-hee looked between the two for a few seconds before waving her hands. “No, no Zhong it’s fine, really.  No I don’t have any of my work in museums but I have had four buys so while I have no works in museums I do have some private buys.”  Sung-hee stood a little taller as Iva’s expression fell and Zhong looked a little pleased though he gave Sung-hee an apologetic smile. 

“Oh.”

Ha!  What now!  That’s what you get!  Uh I’m the best yeah that’s right you can’t defeat me I’m the amazing Sung-hee you and your fake nails can just get-

“Sung-ah!” 

Sung-hee turned to find Delphine racing up towards her with her heels clacking against the marble flooring.  The girl in question stopped a few inches before reaching Sung-hee, apologized for stealing her away and dragged her towards the grand staircase.  Sung-hee took a moment to glace back to see Zhong angry expression as he talked to his sister.  With a sigh of relief she looked back at Delphine as they reached the staircase.  “You’re a life saver.”

The Japanese girl turned and shrugged, “Iva’s a but she’s my best guy friend’s sister so I put up with her.  That’s not why I dragged you away though.  I warmed up my uncle to the idea of meeting you and he’s upstairs let’s go!” 

Without another word Sung-hee practically shot up the stairs with Delphine on her heels.  Once at the top they both looked around anxiously and Delphine pointed to a man who was talking lightly with another man.  He was tall, with his hair cut short and a glass of champagne was lightly held between his fingers and even from afar he carried an aura of an experienced man.  For Sung-hee it was terrifying.  She didn’t even notice Delphine fixing her hair and picking little lint off her dress.  “Yah!  Stop it you!”  Sung-hee hissed smacking Delphine’s hands away.  “It’s not like I’m asking him out on a date!” 

“You might as well be!  You’re asking him to look at your art!”

“Oh shut up go mingle and text me when we have to leave.” She shooed Delphine away quickly, more like pushed her back towards the stairs with a firm look of ‘don’t interfere with what I’m doing’.  Delphine hesitated for a moment but eventually complied after darting up to fix Sung-hee’s dress one more time.  Any other time Sung-hee would have yelled after her but the atmosphere was so quite with only gentle classical music playing she wasn’t willing to bring all that attention to herself and her dear friend.  No matter how annoyed she was.

Slowly she walked over her mind racing with ways to introduce herself and none of them seemed to be good enough for the situation.  Perhaps she should have gone to more parties of this nature with Hyo when she was given the opportunity?  Of course back then she was too cluttered in her own life to be able to learn anything from talking and discussing others.  For just a moment she felt like she was in a movie once more when the other man excused himself leaving Delphine’s uncle alone for just long enough for Sung-hee to step in and introduce herself.  Bowing lowly she gave him a polite smile.  “Hello my name is Sung-hee Park; I’m a friend of Delphine’s.”  He gave a small bow as well.

“Yes Delphine’s told me quite a bit about you.”  He motioned for her to follow him and after a moment of hesitancy she did so, spotting Delphine on the stairs as they walked by and the crouched down girl gave Sung-hee a thumbs up.  To which she responded by sticking her tongue out and looked forward just in time for Mr. Hitashi to glance over at her.  “So I’m sure Delphine has told me that I’m an artist as well.” 

Sung-hee nodded in response wondering why he wanted to talk about his own work when she was determined to get him to talk about her own.  Of course she wouldn’t be able to push the matter; at this point she just needed him to remember her name.  “Yes she has.”

He smiled a little and stopped at the railing and turned to the sea of people below who were chatting and mingling happily.  “And I’m sure you know that I’m a painter,” He smirked a little bit, “like yourself.”  Just what exactly has Delphine told him anyway?  I probably should have checked before I came up here.  With that Sung-hee wanted to smack herself but resisted the urge somehow. 

“Yes sir.”  She wasn’t sure what else to say to him while still holding a respectful tone.

“I’m sure you know I paint portraits.  Portraits of others at their request but what you probably don’t know is that this art form has allowed me to develop a sense of what is going on in a person’s life.  I can tell you something about everyone in this room without even talking to them.”  He glanced over at Sung-hee before pointing to a woman with a long sleeved dress and small hat, over by one of the many refreshment tables.  “See the woman in the long sleeved dress?  She’s not sure where her husband is and she’s paranoid that he may be cheating on her.” He pointed to the stairs.  “The man in the blue suit?  Yeah he’s got a drinking problem and he’s already had too much but he doesn’t want to go find his wife in fear that she’ll yell at him and cause a scene.”  He continued this with a man that was terrified of crowds but was dragged by his wife, a woman who is desperate to get laid and a young man who was worrying about a pregnancy test being positive.  Throughout all of it though Sung-hee wasn’t entirely sure as to why he was telling her all of this. 

She turned from the last man that he pointed to and tilted her head to the side while keeping her actual posture as straight as she possible to keep the professional appearance that he had yet to drop as well.  “I’m not so sure that I’m following you sir.”  She admitted with a small frown and he just smiled at her as if he knew that she was going to ask that question and he knew exactly what was going on through her mind. 

“What I’m saying Ms. Park is that you are a very conflicted girl.  While your work shows promise until you find your face you will not be able to reach your full potential.  I can help you along the way some if you allow me but you’ll have to find it on your own.” 

“Find my,” She paused and bit her lip, “face sir?”  She wasn’t entirely sure what that meant and for some reason she felt like he was going to leave her with more questions than he was answers.  He placed both hands on her shoulders and gave her a warm smile. 

“Yes.  You have to find the center in yourself and what makes you want to paint, the face of your work so to speak.  Right now you are too conflicted in your thoughts and you must let the storm settle before you can hope to sharpen and hone your skills.”  He looked behind her to a man, obviously a security guard, motioning him over.  “I hate to leave you with more questions than answers but I have to go Ms. Park.  It was a pleasure meeting you.”  They exchanged bows and he left her in the most confused state she had been in a long time. 

Huffing she kicked the railing a little and sighed, “Why is it everyone leaves me with more questions than they do answers?  Most annoying thing ever.”  She just didn’t understand why she couldn’t get a straight answer for once.  Why couldn’t he come up to me and tell me oh you have issues work that out before you try and approach me again?  I’m so done with asking people for advice all they do is drive me crazy!  She was grumbling darkly to herself when someone, clearly feminine, cleared their throat.  Turning, she found Delphine who was smiling at Sung-hee in an ‘I told you so manner’.  “Can I help you?”

She shook her head and fell into the same position next to her friend, hands hanging over the railing, laced and one foot tucked behind the other.  “He told me the same thing you know?”  When she felt Sung-hee’s eyes on her she continued, “Yeah he told me ‘go find your face Delphine then you can be a great sculptor’.”  She imitated her uncle’s gruff voice earning a giggle from Sung-hee.  “So I did.  You wanna know what it was?” 

Sung-hee almost felt stupid for asking, knowing it wasn’t necessary for her to but she felt compelled.  “What?”

Delphine smiled and turned her head to her friend.  “Korea.  I came to Korea because this,” she tapped her temple, “and this,” she tapped where her heart was, “told me to.  And he was right my work improved so much and I became happier.  It’s not as hard as you think you just have to give it time to appear and snatch it up when you get the chance.” 

Sung-hee blinked three times, opened and closed twice as if she wanted to speak and sighed once before slinging her arm around Delphine’s shoulder.  “What would I do without you?” 

Delphine slung her arm around Sung-hee’s shoulder as well, “I’m not so sure go crazy?”  Sung-hee laughed a little bit and Delphine winked, “Let’s get out of here we got what we came for, sat through a boring toast and gave money and I’m craving some sushi.” 

Sung-hee giggled and moved her arm to link arms with Delphine.  “Dressed so elegantly?”

An appalled look passed Delphine’s face, “Honey, honey, honey.  Dressed up or dressed down it is sushi time anytime.”  Laughing the two headed down the stairs had a few brief meet and greets with a few people and slipped out before anyone else was wiser to their plans.  They knew they would get odd looks for the way they were dressed but that never stopped them before.  At least not in Dunkin Donuts.