[L e t t e r s | to | Y o o n a]

E I G H T

Dear Yoona,

I couldn't believe it when I woke up this morning (well, yesterday morning, actually. I only just got home) and saw the note on my bedside table.

It was more than a note. It was a letter.

I've remembered every single word of it now. You said:

Dear Luhan,

I saw your letters.

And I'm sorry. I really am.

I miss you, too. But we can't be friends anymore.

It hurts a lot, missing you and not knowing where you are. It's like someone's taken a piece of me and destroyed it.

I'm going insane.

I know this sounds crazy, but can you come to the lake today?

Forever and always,

Yoona.

Of course I went.

I knew exactly which lake you meant. It was the one we visited last winter.

I think that was the last winter that we were friends, because I remember now that we didn't talk after that winter. I don't remember why, and I suppose I should, but I don't. And I don't know why I don't remember.

Maybe it's because I thought we'd always be friends.

Anyway, as soon as I read the note, I got on my bike and started heading for the lake. It's about an hour's ride away, and I have to admit that it was a lonely ride. It never felt like an hour's ride when we rode there together, but I can tell you now that it felt every bit that long when I went there today.

Did you ever notice that the grass in the fields on the way to the lake is overgrown? I don't know why I'm telling you this, since you probably don't care, but I never noticed before. I suppose my surroundings never mattered to me when I had you right in front of me.

I don't know whether or not I felt relieved when I finally arrived, but soon I felt disappointed because I didn't see you anywhere.

The lake is a fairly large one, with little streams, rivers and creeks leading off it at various points, so it should have been understandable that I didn't see you, but we always met at the pier. The disused pier that leads off from the dirt track into the water.

But you weren't there.

There's a path that slopes down and leads to the edge of the lake, right at the bottom of the little valley that it's tucked into. I went down that path, but you weren't there, either.

I was a little mad then, but then I realised that you might not have turned up yet. So I walked back up and waited for you at the pier. I don't know how long I waited, but the sun was beginning to dip in the sky and you still weren't there.

And then I decided that you probably weren't coming. It wasn't like you to be late.

I thought it would be a waste riding to a place an hour away and having nothing to come back with, so I went for a walk. This time, I kept walking off the dirt track, along the edge of the lake and into the forest.

It's not much of a forest. Just a few trees here and there, but their branches are widespread, and the tree canopy almost blocks out the sky. In the afternoon, if you walk through the forest, it seems like early morning with the lack of light.

There are a lot of leaves on the ground, too, leaves of all colours and shapes. And it's really quiet.

I kept walking through the forest until it thinned out. The part where the forest thins out is the same part where the lake curves into a river. The water was fairly shallow at that time, with the riverbed just visible under the sheet of fast running water.

It was easy enough to cross, but at night, it can get dangerous. There are sharp rocks jutting out along the way, and if you don't watch where you're going, you might slip and hit your head on one of them.

I made it across fine, though. The other side had a forest, too, but I wasn't that familiar with it. I think I've only been there once, not counting the time I went there today.

I kept walking, and eventually, I came across a clearing, a quiet haven shadowed by the tree canopy, with penny-sized holes in the leaves that let light through to the forest floor.

And I saw you lying there.

You were awake, and I remember being so surprised that I couldn't move.

But then my body started moving of its own accord, and I found myself lying next to you.

You turned to me and smiled, and I swear the rest of the world disappeared in that moment and I melted.

I thought it would be impossible, but I think, until that moment, I forgot just how beautiful you are.

I started crying and you were crying, too, the tears streaking out from the outer corners of your eyes and sliding down the sides of your face and onto the grass.

I rested my hand on the grass next to yours, and we just looked up at the tree canopy, watching the light streaming through change positions whenever the leaves moved.

And after a while, you said, "I miss you, Luhan."

I didn't dare look at you then, because I knew that I'd start crying again and you'd see just how weak I am. So I just nodded and said, "I miss you, too."

After that, we lapsed into one of those comfortable silences. I didn't know what would happen after that, if we were going to go back to being friends again, but I didn't really care. All that mattered to me was that you were there with me.

I don't know how much time passed, but after a while, you pointed to the sky and said, "Do you see the stars, Luhan?" You sounded like you were crying again, and I tried my hardest not to look at you.

I didn't know what you were talking about, because the sun was setting and there were no stars. But then you said, "I don't see them, either. I wish I could."

And I said, "Just wait a little while. They'll come out soon."

You didn't say anything, then, and it was silent again.

When the sky started getting dark, you whispered something. You said, "I'm sorry."

I remember thinking that you were ridiculous. I was the one who should have been saying sorry. But then you leant your head against my shoulder and everything I'd been planning to say just flew out of my mind.

I thought I knew just how much I missed you, but I realised then that I've missed you much more than I thought.

And I love you much more than I thought.

Eternally yours,

Luhan.