“I don't understand you at all”

“why? Just now you realize everything?” My heart is bitter.

“You have change”

“me or it's you” I asked again, mad with him.

“I'm still me,the one that you know” he replied coldly.

“liar...you always said that I'm the one who change but the truth is you're the one that most changes. I'm not a fool to not know that you don't love me anymore,” I said, a bit yelled.

Why you never understand my heart? My feeling...you only care about yourself, I hate you Junho...I don't care even you hate me right now... you who never there for me make me realize that I don't love you anymore but still I can't just forget you, you the one that taught me about love and this long time relationship make me feel wise to lose it.

Of course I cherish all the moment we have been through together, but yet with your behavior nowadays make me feel bitter, do you really love me?

“I'm tired with all the argument, just break-up,” I said slowly as looking at him. He just stared at me with an angry look. I clenched my fist, still hoping a miracle.

“Fine, is not I would die if we separated,” he said before just leaving me here, in this bookstore, the place when we first meet.

My heart was sinking that time and my tears want to fall but it won't. Why? I'm a too sad or I'm just relieved? I don't understand myself either. As I just looking him away, the feeling is hard to describe but I still feel sad, even the raining don't make him stop from walking away from my life.

Do you really love me, Junho-ah? Do you really don't have any feeling for me anymore? I'm sad but what can I do. I just let you go.

My mind was blank afterwards that I don't care about others who watching me obviously look miserable. Is my world ends here? I don't know.

“Kim Hyoyeon, what are you doing here?”

That voice, I know who he is, he is my dance partner. Yoon Doojoon, the one who is always cheerful and playful.

I just looking at him sadly, he then came closely to me. All looking worried with my appearance, Am I look so pitiful?

“Did something happen?” he asked worriedly. His face show a concern towards me.

I just shake my head, don't want him to involve with my personal matter which is doesn't have related at all to him.

“Is it Junho?” He asked again. Why would he know. He always know about me, always a step further than me. I'm just nodded quickly.

“We break up,” The only sentence that I can say to him. He look a bit shocked.

“Did he?”

“No, it's me,”

“Why would you? Don't you really love him?”

“I don't know either if this still called a love. The spark is missing,” I said sadly.

He just looking at me and then just grip my hand. I was shocked that time but yet I still feel happy. Why would I feel like this? Do I like him.

“Let's go.” he said firmly. I was wondering.

“Go where?” I asked hesitated. He just grinned and then make me run, following his lead.

We're running under a hard rain that non-stop falling upon our body, he still hold my hands tightly and I just following him, we passed numerous person but we never stop.

At this time, I don't understand myself either, why would I will be this happy just running like this with someone that always there for me. My heart keep beating and this feeling was so mesmerized that I can't stop laughing and smile.

I like this feeling, the feel of rain upon my body, the warm hand that keep holding me passing people, the heartbeat that keep beating, the smile that I can't stop and him. Is this a real love?

Just follow his lead and this sparkling feeling hit me again and again, I really wish that this time will stop, the moment I realized that I love Doojoon more than Junho.

“Do you ever heard that if we ran under the rain, all our problem, all our burden will be dissapear?” he asked me with his cheeky smile.

I don't ever know why would I have this courage to hug him tightly, I know it was a risk, maybe I'll losing him forever if he know my feeling right now, what would he thinking about me, easing changing love to other people. But I don't care, I'm too scared if I let him go right now, he 'll become others man.

“Hyoyeon,” He said in low tone, I know it, my feeling is too much for him.

“I know is not the right time for me to say but I want you to know That I love you, I don't when and where did feeling appear, but I'm really sure that I really love you, I do,” I said with b tears, still hugging him even he is not hug me back.

It was a long silent that time and all the seconds and my hearts beat was in pain, waiting for the answer, it's like this time will be forever, all the rain drops sounds heavy to me. Please God, give me a chance to love again.

“I thought it's only a dream that this day will come,” he finally spoken. I loose the hug, looking at him, wondering what's the meaning.

“You silly, I always love you from the first time we meet but I'm scared to say cause I know you're already have Junho. I thought I will just keep this feeling forever, but yet God heard my wish,” he said smiling.

I don't if this tears was happiness but still I'm crying like a fool and he hold both my hand tightly and staring at me.

“It always a rainbow after a rain,” he said and gently wiped my tears with his thumbs.

I just nodded weakly, the love that I thought was loss is was there in front me, glad that I realized it before too late.

“Love is not just only a first love, it also a second time until we realize it was a true love” - Hyoyeon