16

Of Desires and Dreams

 

Chapter 16:

 

The glimmering lights of the ballroom bounced off not only off the polished floors, utensils and decorations, but also off the glittering clothes and jewelry that the guests wore. The setup of the place was a harmonious blend of Korean and Chinese traditional styles, spiced with the different clothes that their guests donned. It was a sight to see, this myriad of culture blending together effortlessly, or at least it seemed.

Servers scuffled around, carrying polished silver platters, offering guests delicacies.

"I don't like it here," Kai muttered, playing with the glass of soda in his hands. He was too young for some of the other drinks, yet he had to be there. His sister was getting married, well, engaged really, but wasn't that the end goal anyway?

"Better not let anyone hear that snide little remark," Seohyun commented with a small smile, taking a sip of hers. She didn't take any alcoholic beverage either, since she hadn't tried drinking before, who knows what could happen.

She turned around to look for someone else she could recognize. Well, someone she could recognize that could recognize her back. A number of the guests present were big names in politics--people she knew for sure, she needed to, how else would she pass her exams?

"Looking for someone?" a charismatic voice asked from behind her. She whipped around and saw Kris with an amused expression on his face.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

"Hosting the event," he replied. "Nice to see you, too. Where's Kai?"

"I'm here," Kai replied, coming up from behind him. "Had to go to the bathroom."

Kris chuckled. "Didn't really need to tell me the specifics. Kai, your sister wants to see you before the event starts."

He scoffed playfully. "She could've said something earlier."

"Sorry, Kai, but I'm the only free messenger," he replied amiably. He then led the two to Yoona's waiting room, somewhere inside the palace.

Yoona greeted her brother with much fervor. She didn't really know the expression she felt, because she felt like crying and laughing and simply squeezing the life out of her dear brother, whom she missed ever so dearly. After pulling herself together, she greeted Seohyun affectionately.

Baekhyun stepped into the room behind Victoria. He was greeted with a shocked expression, a very memorable one from Kai, who could not believe that his friend would be in attendance, and had kept his promise as well as he could.

 

~°~

 

All throughout the night, Lu Han had been asked over and over who Yoona was and why he had decided to marry her. To him, it was simple, he liked her, as in genuinely liked her to the point of loving her. But it seemed that everyone around him was digging around for something more, perhaps a more political reason, yet Lu Han could not ignore the fact that the reason why she ended up there was because of political reasons.

But Lu Han did not like to think of the political things. He found them dirty and inhumane, knowing that so many lives had been taken because of it, and hardly ever because they were threatening the lives of the innocent.

He had not been able to stay by Yoona's side, as the Emperor had asked him to go around and meet his guests, Victoria and Baekhyun would take care of her. But Baekhyun was a newbie as much as Yoona was to these things, how would he help?

He sneaked a glance at her once more and saw that Kris had appeared beside her, introducing her to the people that approached and helping her move the conversation smoothly. He trusted Kris' skills, and was now sure that she was in good hands.

 

~°~

 

"...Ms. Yoona, you have to eat!" Victoria commanded, no longer caring if it was out of line because the poor girl hardly ate anything anymore because she was simply 'not hungry'.

"I'm not hungry!" she retorted, hiding back under the safety of her blankets, trying to hide to no avail.

From outside, she could hear voices whispering, consulting each other as Victoria gently sat down beside her on the bed.

"The truth will set you free, Yoona," Victoria said, gently the younger's hair. "And the truth is not what is being said. Those are rumors, false testimonies of you and your friend."

Yoona whimpered. She didn't like it, not one bit. She felt like a failure, an ignorant little weakling for falling into someone's trap.

"Please don't let Baekhyun lose his scholarship, don't even allow him to be punished! If anything, it was my fault!" she cried.

"Fault?" Victoria parroted questioningly as the door quietly opened.

Victoria took one look at the newcomer, sighed, then exited the room. In her place, a new person sat, not daring to touch Yoona in any way.

"It is not your fault, love," Lu Han spoke gently. "It is not a sin to befriend others, not a fault to love them as brothers and sisters. Concern is natural to anyone who genuinely cares.

"Yoona, love, stop crying. Father does not blame you, no one does. And Baekhyun's scholarship, I can assure you, will not go anywhere. We know, we all know how much a brother he is to you, so much like your own, and your affections are simply the result of such a powerful bond between you and he.

"Square your shoulders, lift high your chin, love. This is a challenge that must be faced, a battle that must be won. A picture paints a thousand words, but actions speak louder than words. Never forget that, because in this kind of life, though there are many things that will challenge you, so many things that will make you think twice, what matters is what is in your heart," he told her. "I refuse to allow anyone to hurt you in this manner, but the only way I can prove them wrong is if you stay strong. For a moment, the world may not believe you, but I do, all of us who know you all do. And is that not what matters most?

"Stand by me, love, and be strong. I'm by your side as well. I promise you, I am here.  I will be here, we can get by this together," he promised.

Lu Han's words were comforting, but somehow, they didn't seem to be convincing enough for Yoona since she didn't know if his trust was enough. So early into their relationship, a mere day after their official engagement, she had already been labeled promiscuous! Simply because she was affectionate to someone other than Lu Han. But Baekhyun was her brother figure, and Kai was her real brother. Why was it so wrong?

"Love, you don't know what father has done about this. I know you preferred if none of those you loved were thrown into the spotlight for your decision, but in order to clear this up, we had to. No one's going to judge you for being loving to your brother, and for being friendly with his best friend. You have done nothing wrong," he urged. "I trust you, and so do our people."

"Lu Han, I just... I just don't know anymore," she replied, sniffling bit, but finally uncurling herself from that fetal position that she had curled herself up into.

Lu Han wrapped his arms around her, burying his face into her hair. Then, he whispered into her ear, "But I do. It's difficult, but please bear with me. We can get through this, you and I. We can. I promise."

 

Lu Han appeared to the public more often after that with Yoona in tow. He said that it was to ease her into the role that she would one day have. After all, he was the Emperor's heir, and she was his soon-to-be wife. A few brave men attempted to question why he allowed her to stay by his side, and always, the answer was because he loved her and she had done nothing wrong.

He was adamant, and the only other thing that could probably describe him was stubborn. For the first time in his life, he had something real to protect, and he would do so to the best of his ability. Why? Because Yoona was precious to him. She was his beloved.

 

~°~

 

Weeks more passed, and soon, months passed, and once more, Yoona sat in front of a vanity table as someone began to work on her hair and make-up. Today was the day. It was earlier, far earlier than many had expected, but it seemed the Emperor was eager to show that she was a woman worthy of what she was given. His people seemed to approve, for Baekhyun's story had quickly spread through the country the moment he began training, as well as his relationship to Yoona and Kai, and they saw that it was not out of a special relationship, but because of a long-founded friendship that triggered Yoona to be quite affectionate to him.

Whoever had created the ruckus failed miserably, for the people knew that their Emperor was a man with a good eye for character. Had Yoona been a questionable character, she would never have been able to step into the palace as Lu Han's fiancée.

"It hasn't been a year," Kai mused as he plopped down onto the bed, watching as the stylist put on the finishing touches. He was here to visit her and see how she's doing. He was the best man, due to Lu Han's effort to reach out to his brother-in-law.

She smiled meekly, not knowing what to say.

"You look lovely, Yoong, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. You're lovely inside and out," he said.

"Why are you spouting such nonsense?" she asked.

"Oh, I don't know, maybe because of that incident almost a year ago? I bet you're sick of hearing Lu Han-hyung say those words and you probably don't believe him as much anymore, but I you don't hear it from me as often, so you must believe me," he shrugged nonchalantly.

"You've become softer," she commented.

He shrugged. "I blame you," he remarked jokingly.

 

~°~

 

The wedding itself was a Christian wedding, something that they did for Yoona, but everything else with regards to weddings were a blend of their traditional cultures. It was likely the most exotic wedding anyone has ever seen in these parts of the world, because it was a blend of three.

During the reception, they switched between wearing traditional Chinese clothes and traditional Korean clothes after showing up in their quite Western ensembles. But Western wouldn't have properly described it.

Yes, Yoona's dress was of the most beautiful white silk in the market, but embroidered into it were pictures, symbols, that were valued in both their traditions. Lu Han's coat and slacks were black, sleek and sophisticated. And much like Yoona's, had embroideries of symbols valued in their traditions, but made with black thread, that only keen eyes from afar could recognize them. Gold lined the sharp edges of his coat.

 

True beauty, they say, was in the eye of the beholder, and Yoona was truly beautiful, no one could deny. Lu Han was simply mesmerized by her beauty, and his expression showed it to the whole world.

"I never knew you could look more beautiful than you normally do," he whispered. "But I guess I was wrong. Yoona, you're absolutely lovely."

Unable to speak, Yoona shied away from his comment and blushed. The pastor chuckled, and the ceremony began.

 

~°~

 

"Why are you in school?" Jia demanded quietly after seeing Yoona in class the next day.

"I still have a paper to pass," she replied.

"May I remind you that you are no longer just anyone? You are now officially Prince Lu Han's wife. You cannot just walk around and everything will be okay," Jia reminded in an alarmed whisper.

"I know," she responded quietly. "Victoria is here, and so is Tao."

Jia shut up, knowing immediately what those implications meant. The school was now under high guard, though no one could obviously see.

"We have to go, we still have a class," Yoona reminded.

Jia watched as her friend walk off to their next class, wondering if something did change. Yoona was now married, why was she acting like nothing's changed?

 

~°~

 

Yoona sat in their room, vigorously working on her homework. A pair of arms wrapped around her shoulders in a warm embrace.

"Take a break," Lu Han whispered. "I know you're a genius, but even you need to sleep."

"Lu Han, I need to finish this soon. I need to-"

"To what?" he asked. "To know more of our history? Knowing is not enough, love. You have to experience it for yourself to say that you know what to do. Yoona, history is the story of the lives of people of bygone days. I understand its importance, but what use is history if you're not going to live? The story ends there, and it's no longer going to be of any good."

Yoona reluctantly loosened her grip on the pen, allowing him to pull it out of her hands. She sighed and squeezed her eyes shut.

"I promised you we'd do things together. We'd do them step by step, until you were ready, and I stand by that promise. However, all that has to wait for tomorrow, for today is done, and it's time to go to bed. Tomorrow awaits," he said, leading her away from the study table and to the bed. "Good night, love."

"Good night," Yoona mumbled almost incoherently, instantly drifting off to dreamland the moment her head hit the pillow.

 

~°~

 

Lu Han weaved his fingers with Yoona's as they sat in front of the river. He closed his eyes, listening to the gentle sounds of the water.

"Lu Han?" Yoona asked, unable to contain her curiosity. "I know you like silence, but... What are you doing?"

"Listening to the river. It's a better advisor than any man who can rattle off his mouth at who-knows-how-many-miles per hour. Those men only know things, they don't know things," he sighed.

"...I think I got confused."

"Some things you learn by the mind, but some things you understand only by the heart," he said. "There are so many things in this world that require such things, and one I assume you are most familiar with is love."

"Love?"

He nodded. "The reason why people so easily confuse themselves is because they have become people who know things by the mind alone, but people are meant to know things by the heart as well. Love is not lust. It is definitely not lust, because love knows what is best, does what is best, and it definitely knows how to care for another. But lust... It is nothing like that. Love will wait, a year, a decade, a century; no matter how long, it will wait, it will care, but lust knows only the now. It knows only itself, its wants.

"That is why so many families are disappearing. Because they are not founded upon what they were meant to--supposed to--be founded upon. So many have forgotten love and known lust, and they think that they are interchangeable, that they are both good enough. But when the glamour is gone, lust is nothing. Lust... lust will forget, it will destroy, but love will hold on, and remember what is worth remembering. It will show true beauty, true worth," he said, looking into her eyes lovingly. "And Yoona, I want you to remember that it's that kind of knowing that will make things different."

Yoona focused on the river's gentle flow, internalizing her husband's words.

"Don't fret, these are things that need to be experienced in order to understand," he said, kissing her on the cheek.

 

~°~

 

Baekhyun sat on the bench, picking at his shoelaces as he spoke to Aze. It's been a year since Yoona got married, half a year since Baekhyun got a more stable position than as a guard-apprentice and a month since Aze transfered there as a permanent student.

Whenever both of them had common free time, which was lunch time, they ate together and shared anecdotes with each other and helped each other out. Relationship problems were far and few, but skill-related ones weren't. Baekhyun would help Aze with his moves, and Aze would help Baekhyun with his work problems.

"You're really not hungry?" Aze asked, offering the contents, or at least what was still in it, of his lunch box to Baekhyun, who gently declined.

He patted his stomach and replied, "Unfortunately, Ms. Yoona's been taking cooking lessons from Qian-xuejie and for the most part, I'm the sole recipient of the fruits of their labor. It's not bad, since Jiejie's cooking has always been good and it's only getting better, but one of these days, I swear--Tao is going to make me go on a diet!"

"Why don't you share?" Aze asked, tapping the plastic box in his hands with the chopsticks.

"I'm force-fed, Aze. They don't like doggie bags," he replied. "And stop lifting your lunch box so high; it's rude."

"Perhaps to Korean culture, it is, but this is China. It's okay to lift your bowls," Aze replied strongly through a mouthful of rice.

"Now that is bad manners. Keep your mouth shut when you're eating!" Baekhyun commanded, and Aze playfully conceded.

 

~°~

 

"Where are you going this time?" Yoona asked curiously as she watched Lu Han pack his belongings.

"Japan," he replied. "Father has asked me to join him there for a meeting."

"I'm sorry I'm unable to join you there," she replied, helping him fold his clothes, a task that he did himself, though he could've easily asked someone else to do so.

"Fret not. We all understand, Yoona," he replied gently. “School is important as well.”

 

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xinli_ang
I. Am. Alive. So I'm back. Sorry for the delays. I hope you enjoy! :)

Comments

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afiqahalya
#1
Chapter 20: So grat wohooo love it make more luyoon story plzz
Nasyiq #2
Chapter 20: Amazing author-nim, amazing is all I could say! Thank you for giving me such a grand pleasure reading this masterpiece of content of yours!
breakeven
#3
Chapter 20: I felt like I was reading a historical novel omg. It's so beautifully written ;A; great job author-nim :')
super_sone02
#4
Chapter 20: Its.. amazing. You are amazing to write this story. This .. I'm speechless. You made an amazing job to complete this beautiful story. Just one advice, Stay the talented you right now. Never give up on writing more stories to take people's breath away. This is just... even the word perfect isn't perfect enough to describe this. I love your hardwork. Great job, author-nim!
obtainable
#5
Chapter 20: this was beautifully written and very original.
well done. c:
iloveloveSNSD
#6
Ahh...SeoKris my favorite couple..haha
dinhae
#7
Chapter 16: omg!u updated! /throws confetti/ i don't know why this chapter made me cry.,i know this chapter is not a dramatic chapter, but...... i don't know i just cried! i smell problems!

i'm soooo happy u updated! /hugs u/
dinhae
#8
this is a nice update!!! Luhan and Yoona getting married?? hahaha yes!!! but i smell conflict on the way!!! tsk!! i hate conflicts, but it's part of the story!! :) awwww, sometimes i feel like Kai likes Yoona in a man-women way... but, i know kai was just missing his sister that is very close to him.. i wonder who are Luhan's other brothers..
soneorblink #9
Hello! I've read almost all chapters in one sitting! Your writing is so good. This fic is really addicting! Luhan and Yoona are just too sweet and I am loving the way the other characters interact with them. XD I am liking Kai's character here. He really loves her sister. Awww ;A; XD Sometimes I even think if he loves Yoong more than that. lol am i making sense? Forgive me, I just ship YoonaxKai too. lol BUT OF COURSE I REALLY SHIP YOONAxLUHAN :"))
I think this fic will end soon? Am I right? D;
Update soon! XD
dinhae
#10
T____T i was so late..you updated tons of chapters already.. i was on vacation sorry..
anyway!! my fave part is here!!! they already met!! and they are getting married!!! (i'm rolling like a buffalo)
i love all the chapies i missed!!!