How ironic

Tugging at your Heartstrings

Hanni’s phone chimed. The name on the screen made her heart jump.

[thekimminji]
’Bad’ practice today!
Hope you learned your parts, we’re starting it for real
😈

Hanni couldn’t help but chuckle, but it was short lived. She seemed so… normal, compared to what Hanni had seen the day before. The rushing anxiety hit her whole body like a thunderbolt.

Seeing Minji.

Hanni missed her so freaking much she wanted to cry. All of this could have been so easily solved, only if Hanni had accepted her feelings before… what took her so long?

Practicing a bit before leaving, Hanni felt more confident, even if just a tad bit. She would focus on practice, give her best, and when it finished, she would pull Minji apart and talk. That was easy. Right?

As if…

The moment Hanni opened the door and locked eyes with Minji, already sitting at the drums, her heart hit so hard it got her dizzy. How she missed looking at her beautiful face. But not that… sad, deadpanned one. The one that would light up instantly upon seeing Hanni, the smile that would shine, and the crescents for eyes.

“H-Hey, Minji.” Hanni dropped her bag in the corner.

“Hey.” Minji gave her an obvious fake smile and looked away, pretending to check how tight the hi-hat was.

Hanni swallowed the lump in . “Are the others late?”

“They’re coming.”

The air was so thick Hanni’s chest hurt. Oh, that was a nightmare. Minji was mad. She was angry, and Hanni did that. That was Hanni’s fault.

But she wanted to fix it. It was still not too late.

“Uh, M-Minji…” she babbled. “About, you know… Saturday-“

“Hey, guys!” Danielle’s voice boomed behind them.

Hanni closed her eyes and balled her fists at her sides. Really?

Haerin greeted them and went for her spot next to the drums, setting up her bass.

“Wow, where’s the energy?” Danielle frowned, looking around.

“Sorry, I’m kinda tired. But I’ll work hard.” Minji gave her a thumbs-up and another fake smile.

Guess Hanni gotta play the same game. “Let’s freaking go!”

Danielle’s expression changed again to her blinding smile. “Now we’re talking!”

“Let’s jam a bit to warm up?” Minji twirled the drumstick in her fingers. “Then we can play our song once and then ‘Bad’?”

Hanni did her best, she really did. Not glancing at Minji helped. Her eyes didn’t leave the keyboard for a second, not even when they sang their song, where she normally made eye contact with the others to practice being comfortable.

“Let’s go for ‘Bad’?” Haerin said. “It’s probably gonna be a mess at first.”

“Should we do it by parts? Let’s do it until the first chorus first. No singing yet,” Minji said.

It was a mess, indeed. But after a few more tries, they started sounding nice.

And they went like that for a few hours, a break here and there, Minji not talking unless necessary. Hanni didn’t, either. Nor looked her way. Or at least she tried. It hurt when she did, and Minji was never looking her way. Something that was… unusual, honestly.

“Hanni, should we try singing now?”

She gulped. “Yeah.”

No use in escaping it. Now it would hurt, because she started the song. How could my day be bad when I’m with you?

How Hanni wanted to sing that to her. But her voice trembled and she couldn’t look at any of them. She just wanted that attempt to be over because she was doing so badly and was so embarrassed and Minji was there and she was looking so forward to her singing that song-

“Hanni, everything alright?” Danielle asked.

“Yeah, sorry, my throat isn’t in the best condition. I’ll take care of it for tomorrow.”

“I’ll make you tea later. Maybe we should continue without singing for now.”

“Sorry.” Her cheeks burned. She could feel their eyes on her, and she hated it.

She had to endure several more tries, but at least she didn’t have to sing.

“Let’s wrap up?” Haerin asked, checking the time. “I’m getting hungry.”

“Yeah, we shouldn’t overdo ourselves!” Danielle stood up, rotating her torso. “Stretch later and sleep a lot so we have a lot of energy for tomorrow.”

Hanni grew nervous. She just had to wait for Danielle and Haerin to leave, and then she would grab Minji and-

“I’ll be going then, Hyein is calling me.” Minji grabbed her bag and waved. “See you later.”

Hanni couldn’t even call her name, she was out the door.

Great. She was running away.

Danielle and Haerin shared a look, but didn’t say anything. Hanni was glad.

Hanni laid against her pillows, Jerry against her chest, (could be Minji, but…), and phone in hand. She lost count of the number of times she had written and rewritten a text for Minji.

What was the point? If she ran away, she would either not answer, say she didn’t want to talk, or not even open the conversation. Hanni had to find an opportunity to talk to her, face to face.

“Hanni.” Danielle’s voice brought her focus back. “Here.”

She was beside her bed, teacup in hand.

“Awn, Dani.” Hanni pouted, accepting it. “Thank you so much.”

“I felt like you were nervous today.” She sat next to her on her bed. “Can I help somehow?”

“It’s okay. I guess it’s because it was the first time I was singing that song in front of them. And, it feels somehow different than singing our song. I feel more pressure because we don’t have much time until the concert. We practiced our song way more than we could practice ‘Bad’ until then. So I was nervous, yeah.” Hanni did not lie. Just omitted the other reason.

“I get it, really. Tomorrow it will go better! The more times you do it, the better it will be. You can definitely do it! I believe in you!”

Hanni smiled, a true one, for once. “The world doesn’t deserve you, Dani.”

“Shh. Now rest, I’ll do the same.”

Danielle kissed Hanni’s forehead and went to lie on her bed, headphones on.

Hanni unlocked her phone again and stared at her convo with Minji. The last messages were from Saturday before they went to the beach, Minji saying she was ready and heading to her room, with a heart in the end. They always texted like that. Hearts and cute emojis, silly memes and reels that they knew would make the other laugh. Or that reminded them of each other. Hanni went to her profile and scrolled through her pictures. Not a single one she hadn’t pressed the like button already.

She clicked on the latest post on Minji’s Instagram. A selfie of them both, from Danielle’s birthday, at the beach. Minji’s smile was so bright. So pure and adorable and… tears rolled down Hanni’s eyes. She didn’t bother with them. She zoomed in on Minji’s face and smiled as well.

How could Hanni have been so blind?

Minji was kind and funny. Minji was sweet and caring and protective. Minji was silly and cheesy and flirty, in her unique way.

Someone like Kim freaking Minji liked her, and yet, Hanni deliberately chose to close her eyes. How freaking dumb of her.

She felt like giving up. Was she even worthy of Minji? After hurting her like that, what right did she have to go and apologize and tell her she also liked her?

When she had Minji, she pretended she didn’t know her feelings. Now she did know. And she didn’t have her.

Oh, how ironic.

It didn’t make it any less difficult to see Minji on the next day. Because it was the exact same.

“Should we try singing again?” Danielle asked.

They already went through the song a few times, but it was not even near perfect yet. “I think we should refine the instrumental first. It’s still a bit… rough. Uh…” Hanni faced Minji and gulped. “The d-drums are kinda loud… overall.”

Minji nodded, meeting her eyes for a second. “Okay.”

Hanni made her best efforts to maintain her face normal. Because… that hurt.

“And on the other side, I don’t hear your bass enough, Haerin.”

Haerin gave her an assertive nod. “Got it.”

Again, and again, a bit better each time. Hanni would say a thing or two more, but she lacked confidence. She could be saying more, especially about Minji. She was still being too aggressive, sometimes even rushing. But… Hanni couldn’t come to tell her that.

“What the hell, man,” Minji mumbled as they finished another round, fetching her phone. “Guys, I’m sorry, Hyein just doesn’t stop calling me.”

“It’s okay, take it. Must be important,” Danielle said.

Minji nodded and accepted the call, speaking in Korean. Hanni understood nothing. Minji stood up all of a sudden and aimed for the door, frowning and raising a hand at them as if telling them to wait.

“What happened?” Hanni asked as Minji left and closed the door.

“I think Hyein was telling her to go outside?” Danielle said. “I’m starting to get worried.”

Hanni took in a deeper breath. Was something happening with Hyein? If it was, Minji was probably worried, of course. And Hanni wasn’t there for her…

“Should we go check on her?” Danielle asked.

“No, if she’s on the phone with her sister, let her be. She’ll be back,” Haerin said.

Haerin’s bass filled the silence. Danielle joined her with some random guitar chords, and Hanni remained sitting, head down, foot tapping the floor. The anxiety ate her up in a way she felt like throwing up.

The minutes kept going by. And still, no Minji. Hanni was about to put everything aside and go check on her, when the door opened again. Their little improv session stopped and they faced the door at the same time.

Minji stepped inside, and with her, another girl. Taller even than Minji, and Hanni recognized her baby face and thick lips right away.

“So, uh, guys… “ Minji laid a hand on the girl’s shoulder. “This is Hyein, my little sister.”

Hyein beamed and waved, bowing then. “Hello, nice to finally meet you all!”

---

A/N - HYEIN'S FINALLY HERE Y'ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

I wonder how things will go now........... well, look forward to the next chapter :))) 

Twitter - @itzloonatic
CuriousCat - curiouscat.me/itzloonatic

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Comments

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SR_Serenity
#1
Chapter 22: aww, all of them are just too cute. i'm gonna miss this story. this has been my happy pill ever since I started reading. thank you for sharing your work! <3
SR_Serenity
#2
Chapter 21: icb that this is ending too. i always look forward whenever a chapter is coming out 🥲
can't wait to see how the last chapter will end <3
SR_Serenity
#3
Chapter 19: they are so cute and they make me feel so single wth
SR_Serenity
#4
Chapter 18: the girls had finally get their together!!! i hope i can see some bonding between hanni and hyein 🥹🫶
SR_Serenity
#5
Chapter 17: i hope hyein can be their wingman lol
SR_Serenity
#6
Chapter 15: omg girl hanni, that was your chance! i better hear some good reasons on why you let minji walk out like that 🥹
SR_Serenity
#7
Chapter 13: minji is definitely making her moves by quoting w2e's bad lyrics lol
im_cutie
#8
Chapter 10: thank you for always updating, i hope you stay healthy🌸❤️
im_cutie
#9
Chapter 7: thank u for updates🤗 💗
im_cutie
#10
Chapter 6: thank u for updates🤗