Page 26, Heartbreaking
Enchanted - a story of us -
Yonghwa, Jung
I was just got out from my agency building, heading to the park where I agreed to meet Iseul when a man calls my name, stopping me from going as fast as possible because I know I'm late already.
"Jung Yonghwa?" a man with dark brown long coat approaches me. He has his right inside the pocket while his other hand is holding a black hat. He nods slightly to me, "Jung Yonghwa from CN Blue, right?"
Now I just remember that I forgot to wear my disguise equipment. I look at his face, trying to remember who he is just in case I actually have met this person before.
"We never met before," he fixes the position of his glasses with his middle finger. His lips turn into a curve, "But I'm glad we finally meet. I always want to meet you in person."
His next statement is something that I never predicted before. I drop my jaw in shock when he introduces himself, "I'm Song Iseul's father."
He chuckles at my reaction and gives me a smile, "I know, maybe I'm not the best father for her, but I think it's inappropriate for me if I don't talk with you."
Actually I never really talked about Iseul's father with her. All I know is they don't have a really good history together. In fact we avoid to have the topic about her father.
There is one time when Mrs Song mentioned about her husband. It's around a week before my relationship with her was announced for public. I remember Iseul's expression changed immediately.
Mrs Song said that Iseul is their only children and it's her father who always took her for a walk on Sunday. She said that her husband would definitely question me if we met because he was an old-fashioned type of father.
When I asked Iseul after we had that conversation, she said to me that she didn't really want to remember about her father. He was her reason tto work hard and agreed with our deal, because she needed to pay the debt caused by her father.
Therefore I always thought that her father was not a great figure at all. I couldn't blame Iseul if she didn't like him since her life was not in a good state because of his irresponsibility.
Now that I'm facing Mr Song face to face, I actually don't know what kind of greeting I must give to him.
"About your relationship with my daughter...," he opens up the conversation first and I feel nervous all of a sudden. "Is it real, young man?"
I part my lips slightly but close them again. I clear my throat nervously before giving him an answer, "Yes..."
"I see...," he responds calmly and it's actually different from what I thought. "You see, she is my only child and I... I heard a rumor that she was just working a deal with you, posing as your girlfriend..."
My eyes widen in shock but no word slips from my mouth. I just stand still and listen to him, "Can I ask you something, Yonghwa?"
The uneasy feeling engulfs my heart but I nod at his question. He smiles and mutters, "A guy like you can have every girl you want so I really hope that Iseul will have a normal life, far from the entertainment world."
He doesn't need to tell me the continuation because I get the hint already; he disapproves my relationship with Iseul.
I thought I could talk with Iseul and told her everything honestly, that our relationship couldn't work for now but I would defend it as hard as I could.
Now the idea is nowhere to be found.
"We shall talk again next time," he snaps me back to my senses. He glances at his phone, "I have an errand to do right now. Well, I hope you will be a good friend for my daughter. Have a good day, Yonghwa."
Mr Song walks away after patting my shoulder twice gently. I stare blankly at the ground with heavy heart.
A word from the President might waver my decision but the words from Iseul's father...
It's not like I have another choice to make.
I walk slowly to the park and find Iseul with Myungsoo. None of them notices my presence and somehow I feel grateful for it because I don't know what kind of expression I have right now.
I clench my fists, cursing myself mentally since I know that I will hurt Iseul soon even though I don't want to do it.
"Looks like you two are really close," I dare myself to speak. I put the expresionless face, looking at them.
"He just wants to visit my mother and he walked pass here," Iseul tries to explain. "If we need to talk in private then-"
"No, it's alright," I cut her words and look away, afraid that I can't do what I must do if I look at her eyes. "Everything is going to end anyway."
Those words are heartbreaking. It feels like my heart is breaking into pieces. However I know Iseul is hurting more than me when she asks, "What are you talking about?"
"It's just a deal, Iseul," I speak up, still avoiding her eyes, feeling guilty for Myungsoo as well. "I was just worried about our contract if he sticks around you all the time."
"Yah, what-" Myungsoo is enraged by my words but Iseul stops him while I tell myself to keep silence. My heart is aching real bad.
"Tell me one thing, Jung Yonghwa," Iseul calls my full name, without the 'Oppa' anymore. "You never really loved me, did you?"
Silence fills the air. I really want to tell her that I have fallen too hard for her that I want to respect everything about her, every single thing of her including her father's decision.
I know I'm a fool for not telling her anything. I know I'm just being selfish because I think this is the best decision I can make.
The President is right. Maybe I'm not ready yet to have a relationship with my busy life. Maybe Iseul and I are not destined together... yet.
"Yes," I murmur vividly. "I never loved you."
Iseul just looks at me with sad eyes. She shakes her head slowly and mumbles, "So this is what you want to talk with me... I got it now. Thank you."
She turns around and walks away as fast as possible. Myungsoo clicks his tongue and groans, "You're unbelievable, Hyung!"
He then rushes to catch up with Iseul, leaving me alone with regret and pain in heart.
"I'm sorry...," I close my eyes. "I'm sorry for being like this..."
Myungsoo, Kim
"Noona! Noona!" I run as fast as I can and grab her wrist to stop her from avoiding the world. She stops and looks up at me with no special expression.
"Yes?" she reacts as I let go of her hand. "What is it? Did you think I was crying, Myungsoo?"
"Ah...," I mumble. It looks like she can read my mind. Well, actually, isn't it natural to be sad because of what just happened?
From Yonghwa's words I finally assume that their relationship is nothing but a deal. However I also found out that they actually had a 'real' relationship; that's why Iseul asked that question to him.
My heart ached when she asked that but when Yonghwa answered her that he never loved her, I was enraged. How could he be so cold to her if they were a real couple?
"It's alright. Really," Iseul looks up at the sky. "It's not the first time for me, you know. To have a faith in someone but end up losing everything."
She heaves a sigh and smiles bitterly, "They said don't make someone your everything because when the person is gone, you have nothing. I guess I just learned the lesson well."
"Noona...," I reach out my hand to touch her face but she takes a step backward from me quickly.
"Sorry, Myungsoo," she apologizes, shaking her head weakly. "I'm still recovering from heartbreak here. I don't think it's a good idea to-"
I don't wait for her to finish her words. I pull her into a hug and bury my face on her hair, inhaling her scent.
Iseul doesn't cry but I think she is just hiding her sadness inside. I don't know why but she looks fragile for me despite the fact that she is acting tough from the outside.
"Then let me heal your broken heart...," I whisper. "I will always be here for you."
She clutches on my shirt and buries her face on my chest. After around five seconds, she pushes me away slightly, breaking the hug. Iseul gives me a small smile, "You are a really good friend, Myungsoo, and I appreciate it. It must be hurt for you too, right?"
"A friend...," I blurt out my thought out loud. "Can I ever pass that line?"
"I don't know," she answers me honestly. "I don't have any confidence to define what is certain or not anymore."
Iseul tucks her hair behind her right ear and returns her gaze to me again, "Why don't we visit my mother now? I'm sure she is waiting for your visit."
There she goes, avoiding the conversation again. However this time I think I can endure it; she is heartbroken and she doesn't let the world to see it.
If only she knows that it's more heartbreaking for me to see her like this, hiding her sadness when I know that it's really hurt inside.
Maybe, just maybe, if only I stay just a little bit longer with her, she will open up her heart for me.
She clutches on my shirt and buries her face on my chest. After around five seconds, she pushes me away slightly, breaking the hug. Iseul gives me a small smile, "You are a really good friend, Myungsoo, and I appreciate it. It must be hurt for you too, right?"
"A friend...," I blurt out my thought out loud. "Can I ever pass that line?"
"I don't know," she answers me honestly. "I don't have any confidence to define what is certain or not anymore."
Iseul tucks her hair behind her right ear and returns her gaze to me again, "Why don't we visit my mother now? I'm sure she is waiting for your visit."
There she goes, avoiding the conversation again. However this time I think I can endure it; she is heartbroken and she doesn't let the world to see it.
If only she knows that it's more heartbreaking for me to see her like this, hiding her sadness when I know that it's really hurt inside.
Maybe, just maybe, if only I stay just a little bit longer with her, she will open up her heart for me.
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