Note: This is going to be the longest chapter thus far and the heaviest. Don't say I didn't warn ya.

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The feeling is as though something is sparkling inside the core of their bodies the moment their lips touch. There are no thoughts. There is just them sharing this time, and it is enough.

Then Eunbi moves to deepen the kiss, Sakura instinctively inhales taking in everything. And it hit her. Deja vu. The last time something similar happened, the discovery hit her like a train. I realised I like her. This time, it came with a kiss. What are we doing?!

Sakura pushes Eunbi away and exhales violently, taking steps away from the other girl. Eunbi is visibly agonized by this strong rejection. But she understands she incited it, I went way past the threshold this time and I don’t think there is any return.

“Sakura…” She calls out weakly.

“No.” The younger girl refuses to meet her eyes.

The sun begins to set and this could be a romantic scene for anyone. Yet for the two girls stuck at the peak of the mountain, the setting sun is mocking them. It reminded of the fact that because it took a long time to get up, it will take an equally long time to get down. Should they not make their way soon, they can be trapped in the mountainous area with no electricity.

Logic reasons over Eunbi as she pushes aside her emotions and walks straight up to Sakura to stand before her. Sakura immediately turns away and Eunbi has no choice but to follow behind. “Listen to me.” Her voice is stern, prompting Sakura to stop in her footsteps.

“We can talk about it, or we can avoid it. Whatever it is, we need to get down the mountain. Otherwise, it will be dangerous.”

Eunbi takes slow steps towards the girl. She lowers her tone, “So can you please stop avoiding me?”

Sakura feels it. On surface, Eunbi’s words may be to indicate worry for their safety in a hurry to get them down without harm but there is more to those words. Eunbi is also referring to them and whatever their relationship is now, and she is clearly hurt.

It pains Sakura to know that she has hurt Eunbi. She was just so overwhelmed to realise that her plan went from stopping to like Eunbi to actually kissing her. That push was unintentional and she regrets the way it happened. There are so many ways to end that kiss but I chose the worst. Guilt overwhelmed her and she doesn’t want Eunbi to see that. Ironically, one of the reasons why she is falling for Eunbi is due to her maturity and she is right again about this: leaving now will be the best for them.

Slowly, she turns her body to face the girl. It is hard to read the expressions on either one of them. But words can certainly move things along.

“Let’s go.” Sakura whispers.

Fortunately for them, they made it home safe. However that slowly became the least of their concerns as on the flip side, the tension between them builds as they get closer to the city. The car was dropped off at the rental center and they walked back home. The distance did not matter given how distracted both of them were. No words were exchanged but thoughts were running wild in either of their heads. Neither knew how to begin. The girls were physically and mentally strained. What exactly is their relationship now? Is there even one left?

“I am sorry.” Eunbi says out loud on the street right outside their apartment building.

Sakura was walking ahead so she has to pause in her tracks upon hearing Eunbi’s first words since the incident. She waits.

“No actually I am not.” Eunbi exhales. “Maybe there is some fault for kissing you. But ask yourself if I felt this wrongly-”

Eunbi has been taking slow steps towards the younger girl and Sakura could feel it as her voice gets closer. Her next words end up in a whisper, and Sakura hears every single one that follows.

“You wanted it too.”

The pause in the air is deafening. With Eunbi just watching Sakura’s still back, the rare quiet night in Kent Street seems to be paying tribute to one crumbling relationship.

“I saw the drawing. The one you tore and left in the bin.”

Upon hearing that, Sakura suddenly feels like it is hard to breathe. She clenches her fists in an attempt to stay calm but her heart continues racing.

“It’s beautiful. And I don’t think anybody can draw that without strong feelings. Tell me if I am wrong Kura…”

The endearing name calling triggers the said girl. She inhales deeply and finally turns to face the other girl.

Sakura looks Eunbi in the eye. “You are wrong. You made a mistake.”

Sakura continues, “For firstly, touching my things without my permission.” Eunbi tries to interjects but Sakura persists.

“Next, for kissing me.” This statement renders Eunbi speechless. Tears begin to form. Sakura sees that but chooses to deliver the final blow.

“Lastly, for thinking that I feel something for you.”

Tears roll down Eunbi’s cheeks and she drops her head, breaking the eye contact. Sakura knows she has hurt Eunbi bad but it has to be done, otherwise she will never be able to stop liking the girl standing before her now. It is selfish but I need to.

Time seemingly stands still again for the second time of the day, except this time around, it is like torture for the both of them. Then Eunbi suddenly tilts her head up and Sakura meets her teary eyes.

In that moment, Sakura wants to retract her statements and apologise but Eunbi’s next words beat her to it.

“I hate you Sakura.”

Sakura is surprised but she knows she deserves it. She waits for more harsh words but what came after shocks her even more.

“Because I love you. And it is quite ironic that the same moment where I realise that was when it was followed by what I thought to be the harshest possible rejection yet. Clearly I was wrong. The push hurts but your words… they hurt more.”

“It’s okay because I know why you said it. I’ll get over the pain. But I don’t think I will get over the anger. The frustration coming from you not acknowledging your feelings. Goodnight Sakura, I am not going home tonight.”

Sakura vaguely hears Eunbi whisper, “I just can’t” before she turns her back and walks away.

Sakura doesn’t know what to do and she can only watch as Eunbi disappears into the darkness. When it hits her that she is all alone, Sakura drops her body down to the ground and sobs.

Eunbi did not come home the entire night, Sakura knew that from staying awake the whole time. She wasn’t sure why: was it because she was worried about the older girl or was it because of the cumulative effect of all the events preceding her departure? Grudgingly though, Sakura had to drag herself out of bed when the sun was up to get ready for school. The time went by really slowly; she could not pay attention in class as her mind kept digressing to the girl she hurt last night. The girl who confessed her love for her.

“I hate you Sakura because I love you.”

Eunbi’s words are etched in her mind.

Last night again, Eunbi did not come home and Sakura couldn’t help but linger outside the girl’s bedroom door as if it will magically conjure her presence. That was when Sakura noticed that the girl’s laptop is gone from her study desk - she probably came home when I was in school. Sakura intentionally knocked her foot against the wall, Eunbi doesn’t want to come home and it is because of you. You should be the one leaving. All Sakura can do is wish that Eunbi’s many years living here plus the friends she has can keep her safe and comfortable.

Another day arrives as Sakura drags herself out of bed. Being at home reminds her too much of Eunbi and she decides to head to the school’s library even though she does not have class. Damn I need some coffee. She barely slept last night, only a slight improvement from the night before and her body was reacting accordingly. Therefore she makes a detour to the cafe nearby and that is where she sees the aforementioned girl.

With her dark black locks and bright white skin, Eunbi stands out amongst the caucasians. She is just wearing a simple black sweatshirt but she still looks captivating. Eunbi is sitting under the shade provided by the umbrella attached to the table she is at, casually playing with her phone not knowing that a watchful gaze is on her. Sakura contemplates if she should walk over. What do I say? How are you? Well that is a good start.

Sakura huffs as she slowly makes her way towards the unsuspecting girl. Then suddenly, Eunbi has a companion - Oh, Santiago. The tall lanky man hands Eunbi a takeaway cup and he sits beside her while sipping on his own. Sakura stops in her tracks. Eunbi brings her phone closer to Santiago, seemingly sharing whatever on her phone with him. He laughs out loud upon seeing it and Eunbi joins in with her giggles. He then naturally rests his arm on the back of her chair, leaning closer to the girl as they continue discussing whatever was on the phone.

Sakura immediately turns around. There is an unhappy feeling brewing inside her and she wants it to stop so she follows along when her body takes her away from the cafe. It took a bit of mindless walking for her to realise that she has brought herself to the school library.

They are friends. Why are you upset?

She tells me she loves me and she is all giggly with another man.

Her angel and devil thoughts are playing with Sakura’s head. Frustrated with how she only can be he