Chapter 12

Don't Wanna Cry

By the time Jeonghan had reached the dorm, it was coming close to midnight. He had never run up those stairs to his dorm so fast in his life that he even surprised himself with how fast he reached the front door. He fiddled with the lock and as soon as he was inside, he ran straight to smallest bedroom that was shared between Dokyeom, Seungkwan and Joshua. He quickly entered the room and almost jumped onto his best friend's bed, shoving the American boy in the process.

"Joshua....Shua, come one, wake up!" Jeonghan whispered loudly.

"Mmmm.....Is it morning already?" The other replied sleepily. 

"No...but this is important. Come on! I need to talk to you!"

But Joshua paid no mind to Jeonghan's urgent tone and instead turned in the other direction, pulling the blanket over his head in an attempt to go back to sleep. Jeonghan was beginning to get impatient so he shoved Joshua hard once again.

"Ya! I'm your best friend and I'm in need right now! How can you turn me away just because you're tired!"

But before Joshua could even reply, a pillow was thrown at his head followed by a very sleepy and annoyed Seungkwan telling them to get out because they were disturbing his beauty sleep. Jeonghan smiled triumphantly as Joshua grumbled and got out of bed since he was now fully awake thanks to the pillow that was thrown at him. And as soon as Joshua had both his feet on the ground, Jeonghan grabbed him by the wrist and dragged him into the living, practically throwing him onto the couch.

"Okay, what is going on and why did you wake me up? You know we don't get much sleep these days and we finally got to go home early today." Joshua whined as he hugged a pillow to his chest. Jeonghan felt a little guilty as he saw just how tired his friend was but he decided that he needed to share what was going through his head before he went crazy.

"I'm sorry Shua, but I really need to tell you something and I don't think I could've waited until morning."

Joshua was now paying full attention, seeing that whatever Jeonghan was about to tell him was indeed very important and that he would need to be in his best friend mode in order to provide whatever help and comfort that Jeonghan may need. Jeonghan saw that Joshua was all ears and that gave him the courage to go on. He took a deep breath and confessed what was in his heart.

"Joshua, I think.....I think I like Seungcheol. Like I really...really like him." Jeonghan said, nervously looking up to see what Joshua's reaction would be. But the older was confused at the knowing smile that Joshua gave him.

"Really? That's what you wanted to tell me?" Joshua was chuckling now, "Seriously dude, you almost gave me a heart attack. I thought someone had died or something!" 

"Why are you acting like this isn't a big deal! I just told you that I have feelings for our leader!" Jeonghan exclaimed, feeling a little annoyed that Joshua was taking this so lightly.

"I mean....it was kind of obvious."

"Ya! Hong Jisoo! What do you mean it was obvious?! This is the first time I've figured this out! Why are you acting like you've known this for a while?"

"Because I have. Come on, Han. Don't tell me this is the first time you've found yourself thinking about Cheol in that kind of way. I mean you're always looking at him like he's the best thing to have ever happened to you. You're always cheering him on and you're always the first one to know when something is wrong."

"Yeah, but-" Jeonghan wanted to protest, not fully believing that his feelings have always been there but he had just been to blind to see them.

"You pay attention to him. You listen to what he has to say and he does the same for you. You enjoy spending time with him and you always look for him when you want to do something. And besides me, I think you're the most comfortable and happy when you're around him."

"But like you said, I do all of those things around you too. So how do you know that what I feel for him is not purely friendship like how I feel towards you." Jeonghan said, still trying to comprehend everything Joshua had told him.

"Because you don't look at me the way that you look at him...You've been in love with Seungcheol for a while."

"....Yah...who said anything about love? I'm just talking about liking him here....I don't think I'm ready for love." Jeonghan said, scared to think that what he felt may be as deep and as strong as love.

"Okay, well whether you like Seungcheol or you're in love with him, you can at least admit that you feel something for him, right?"

Jeonghan just nodded and he was going to reply when he heard a new voice say "finally!" in an excited tone. He turned towards the new voice and found Woozi taking off his shoes as he shut the front door.

"Woozi? Are you just getting back to the dorm now? Where have you been all this time?" Jeonghan asked, sounding much like a worried mother.

"I was at the studio. I got some inspiration for a new song and I just had to write it down....But that's not important. What is important is the fact that you finally realized your feelings for Seungcheol."

"Hey! How many people knew about this before I did?" Jeonghan said, pouting as he did so.

"Practically everyone, Seungkwan and Hoshi even have a bet going on." Woozi said with a smirk.

"A bet?! How dare they bet on my feelings! I demand 60% of the profit!" Jeonghan said, standing up in outrage.

"That's not important Jeonghan." Joshua said, pulling his friend's arm to sit back down on the couch.

"....right. Now the only thing is, what do I do with these feelings?"

"Isn't it obvious? You tell Seungcheol!" Joshua said like it was the most simple thing to do.

"Are you crazy? I can't tell him that I like him! What if he says no? What if he rejects me and then things become awkward between us? What if he hates me for it? It could ruin the group! I can't risk that!" Jeonghan said, slightly freaking out at all of the possibilities.

"Okay....but I know Seungcheol better than any of you and I can promise you, he could never hate his angel." Woozi said the last part playfully, while placing a comforting hand on Jeonghan's shoulder.

"But what about Ara? She's made it clear that she's interested in him! She already hates my guts and I'm pretty sure if she found out that I liked Seungcheol too, she'd kill me!"

"Then you kick her ! I would've done it myself if she wasn't Seungcheol's friend." Woozi said, getting annoyed that Jeonghan was giving up on himself so easily. especially in comparison to Ara. "Honestly, I don't think she stands a chance against you. You're a much better pick than Ara and you could actually make Seungcheol happy. Just thinking about that girl being in a relationship with him is a nightmare! I say just go for it and tell Seungcheol how you feel!"

"Woozi's right. You have nothing to worry about. And you have the rest of Seventeen to support you! Just go with your gut feeling and everything will work out for you and Seungcheol." Joshua said, giving Jeonghan the reassurance the older boy needed.

Jeonghan just sat on the couch, biting the nail of his thumb as he considered the words of his friends. They were right but Jeonghan was still too nervous about his recent self revelation of his feelings to do anything so soon. But as he continued to stare at his two members, he only saw smiles on their faces, showing their full support for him.

"Thanks you guys. I really do appreciate the help but I think it's too soon to do anything. And besides, Seungcheol is still recovering. I don't think he needs to deal with my feelings on top of everything else he's going through. I'll just continue to be there for him and if something comes out of that then so be it."

"Alright, you do whatever you think is best. Just don't be afraid of your feelings, okay?" Joshua said before getting up from the couch and making his way back to his room. Woozi followed Joshua, patting Jeonghan on the shoulder before going to his own room that he shared with S.coups, Jeonghan and Mingyu.

Jeonghan gave them one last smile before preparing himself to bed as well. He felt better after talking to Joshua and Woozi and he was more than grateful knowing that he had them to lean on. 

As Jeonghan went to bed that night, his only thought was how he was going to go about his feelings towards Seungcheol when he was around the leader and how he was going to deal with Ara. It was going to be complicated but Jeonghan believed in himself. He knew his feelings were honest and true so there was no way things could turn out bad. Jeonghan then chuckled to himself because when was the last time he felt his heart race like this? He really liked Seungcheol and now he was fully embracing it. He thought back to all of the things he liked about Seungcheol, from his personality to the way he dressed and how he felt in general when he was in the leader's presence. It all made him feel giddy and he felt a blush creeping up his face. Jeonghan actually had to burry his face in his pillow to stop himself from squealing. Seungcheol was amazing and Jeonghan realized that he adored everything about the other. The singer couldn't help but to be excited about his feelings and he drifted off to sleep with a smile on his face, thinking about Seungcheol's laugh as he just happened to have "Adore You" stuck in his head...Jeonghan just laughed because of how fitting it was.

 

 

As excited as Jeonghan was to see Seungcheol now that he knew how he felt towards the other, he still had responsibilities as an idol that he had to go through with. Sadly, it took about 3 and a half weeks before Jeonghan could visit the leader because not only did he have his regular schedules, but their CEO had placed extra activities on him during the weeks as a punishment for sneaking out the last time without informing anyone where he was going. Jeonghan thought it was ridiculous because he had the day off but when he tried to argue that, he just got a lecture from his CEO telling him not to talk back. It was frustrating but he was used to it. After being an idol under Pledis for so long, you learn to just keep quiet and do what they tell you to do. The only person who ever had the guts to actually stand up to the higher ups was Seungcheol and with him gone, Pledis could walk all over Seventeen without having to worry about Seungcheol's wrath. Jeonghan wanted so badly to stand up for himself and his younger members just like Seungcheol had done countless times before, but he knew he could never be as brave as the older boy.

But Jeonghan didn't let himself dwell on that depressing topic for too long because right now he was standing in front of the Choi's house, along with the performance unit. It took a little less than a month but he finally found time in his schedules to make the trip. He was originally supposed to be at the recording studio with the vocal unit but Jeonghan had made sure to stay late the night before and record his parts with Bumzu hyung so that he could have the following day free to tag along with Hoshi and the others. He knew it was a risky thing to do since their CEO was still kinda pissed with him for last time, but this time he had made sure to let others know and he was even given permission to tag along with the others to Daegu. It was stupid that he had to do that, but Jeonghan was glad regardless because having permission meant that no one could complain. 

It was Seungcheol's father who had opened the door for them and the man looked so happy to see them. He led them inside the house and told them to make themselves comfortable. Jeonghan had asked where the man's wife was and he told them that Mrs. Choi and Seunggil had gone to the grocery store to pick up some ingredients to make Seungcheol's food and that they would be back in a little while. The boys and Mr. Choi then continued with small chit chat for a while longer before the members excused themselves and went upstairs to Seungcheol's room. And just like always, Ara was there.

"Oh Cheollie! You're so funny!" The girl said while faking a laugh and holding onto Seungcheol's arm, clearly trying to get a feel of the muscle there. "Oh and so muscular too! I just knew you'd become so strong ever since we were kids. Remember that time we were 11 and you won me a stuffed bear because you scored so high on that strength tester game at the carnival. You were so manly! I mean you still are! And so handsome too!"

Ara's obvious flirting made Jeonghan want to gag. Seriously, how could Seungcheol stand to be around her? And why was she still feeling up his arm! Jeonghan wanted to go over there and yank her arm off of Seungcheol's but he settled for a glare, remembering his promise that he made to older boy about acting nicer towards Ara. Thankfully though, Ara removed her arm from Seungcheol when Hoshi got their attention, letting both Seungcheol and Ara know that they were also inside the room. Seungcheol greeted them excitedly and Ara faked a smiled towards them but still barely acknowledging them. She then continued to stare at Seungcheol with what Jeonghan had to guess was her version of heart eyes and the singer felt the same urge to gag come again.

"Don't you have a life?" Jeonghan said before he would stop himself. Everyone, including himself, looked shocked.

"Excuse me?" Ara replied.

"I just meant....you're always here. It must be nice to be able to spend all of your time with Seungcheol. Taking care of him and whatnot. Seungcheol's lucky to have someone who's that obsessed with spending so much time with him." Jeonghan knew he was treading on dangerous waters and that this was the exact type of attitude that Seungcheol didn't appreciate but Jeonghan couldn't stop himself. He had dealt with Ara's bull for far too long and knowing how he felt towards Seungcheol just made him all the more irritated with the girl. 

"At least I make the effort to come see him. I guess that shows who's really his friend. I mean I haven't seen you around here in a month! What? Can't even spare one day to see your precious leader? Shows how much you care." Ara said with a scoff.

Jeonghan wanted to scream. It wasn't his fault and he had made the effort. Countless times! It's just that he had a stupid company to answer to and they kept denying him the chance to visit Seungcheol. Not everyone had the same freedom she had where they could just rearrange their daily plans in order to spend time with the boy they liked. It annoyed Jeonghan and it bothered him even more now that Ara was calling him out on it. He was about to retaliate but Jun and Hoshi held him back while Minghao and Dino looked at each other nervously. 

"Hey, Ara. You know that's not fair. I'm sure Jeonghan and the others all tried to come see me. It's just that it's probably hard with Pledis being constant jerks all the time. I've told you how hard it can be to be an Idol. So don't blame them for something that is probably out of their hands." Seungcheol said in defense. Jeonghan felt his heart flutter because at least Seungcheol understood the situation he was in and it seemed that the older wasn't the slightest bit upset that it had been so long since Jeonghan's last visit. 

It's just like Seungcheol to be so understanding. Why is he so cute? 

"Thanks Cheol." Jeonghan said, but then he paused when he recognized the familiar grey and black pattern of Seungcheol's sweater and he realized just what the older boy was wearing. Another smile found its way onto Jeonghan's face. "Hey...is that my sweater?"

Seungcheol could only blush. "....it's warm and I was cold."

Ara's face visibly dropped while the smile on Jeonghan's only continued to grow wider.

"You don't need an excuse to wear my sweater Cheol. I let you borrow it so that you would wear it. And I'm so glad that you are....it looks really good on you." Jeonghan said with a blush of his own. Hoshi, Minghao and Jun were giggling by the doorway and even Dino had to chuckle at his hyungs. The only person who wasn't amused by the scene was Ara. 

"Cheollie! If you were cold why didn't you tell me? I would've turned down the AC!" The girl complained, obviously not liking that Seungcheol was wearing Jeonghan's sweater.

"It's fine Ara. But if you are going downstairs then can you get me some food? I'm really hungry." Seungcheol said hopefully. Ara looked like she wanted to protest and Jeonghan guessed that it was because she didn't want Seungcheol to be alone with s, but Seungcheol gave her his puppy eyes and she found herself going down to get some food for him without question. When she was gone, Seungcheol let out a sigh and then tried to get up out of the bed.

"Thank god she's gone." Jeonghan heard the older boy say under his breath. "Hey, can one of you guys assist me to the bathroom? It's kinda embarrassing having Ara walk with me whenever I have to go."

The others just laughed lightly and then Jun and Minghao went to Seungcheol's side and let the older boy use them to balance himself as they headed towards the bathroom across the hall. When it was just Dino, Jeonghan and Hoshi inside the room, the two younger boys didn't waste a second to tease Jeonghan about the sweater and the blush that was still on his face but they quickly shut up when Seungcheol returned to the room with China line and then all of the boys found themselves on Seungcheol's bed, just chatting away mindlessly.

Ara came back a few minutes later with a bowl full of warm soup and she huffed in annoyance when she saw that her spot on Seungcheol's bed was taken up by Dino. 

"Ya! Cheollie! How am I supposed to feed you if there's no space for me on the bed?" She said while pouting.

"I'm pretty sure Seungcheol hyung is more than capable of feeding himself." Jun said with a smirk, enjoying the fact that Ara couldn't yell at them like he knew she wanted to, at least not in front of Seungcheol or else she would risk the other getting mad at her.

"But Cheollie!" Ara was stomping her foot now.

"It's okay Ara. I'm a big boy, I can feed myself. Thank you for getting my food though! I don't know what I'd do without you!" Seungcheol said with the cutest smile. It hurt Jeonghan a little to hear Seungcheol talk so sweetly to Ara but then he remembered that that's how Seungcheol always was. Always so kind and considerate of other people's feelings. 

What did annoy Jeonghan was seeing Ara's face light up at the compliment and the smug look she wore on her face as she walked closer to the bed to hand Seungcheol to bowl of soup. Jeonghan tried his best not to glare at the girl but thankfully his attention was taken away from her when he heard the front door being opened, followed by Mrs. Choi's and Seunggil's voices.

"Sounds like my mom and big brother are back from the grocery store. I bet they have a lot of things with them since they took so long." Seungcheol said thoughtfully. "Would you all mind helping them put stuff away? You don't have to if you don't want to but I was kind of hoping that I could have some time to myself to eat my soup and read one of the books that Wonwoo gave me."

No one could argue with a request like that so they all made their way out of Seungcheol's room, making sure to shut the door behind them. Ara was glaring at all 5 boys and the performance team just ignored her and made their way downstairs. Jeonghan was about to follow them when Ara had caught him by the back of his shirt before he could leave.

"You. Me. Talk. Now." She said and then dragged him into the same empty bedroom that they had used twice before.

"It looks like you and I keep meeting up in here to have these secret conversations. You better be careful....You don't want Seungcheol to get the wrong idea." Jeonghan said playfully.

"Shut up!" Ara said, not appreciating Jeonghan's sense of humor. "You told me that you and Seungcheol were just friends!"

"I did say that." Jeonghan said, matter of factly.

"Then what was that in Seungcheol's room! Why were you blushing!"

"Maybe I changed my mind. Maybe I decided that I want something more than just friendship with Seungcheol."

"What?! No! You can't change your mind! Cheollie is mine!" Ara said, again stomping her foot. 

"The last time I checked, Seungcheol was single...which means he's up for grabs." Jeonghan said, enjoying the look of rage that built up on Ara's face. He stepped a little closer to her to emphasize his point that he wasn't backing down this time. "All is fair in love and war, princess."

Ara looked absolutely pissed and Jeonghan was enjoying every second of it. He knew he was being an but it felt oh so satisfying to finally put the girl in her place after weeks of dealing with her bull. So he decided to go big and really rub the salt in her wound. "And...it looks like I've already got the upper hand. Don't you think Seungcheol looked great in my sweater?"

He smirked when she didn't answer and instead stormed passed him and let out a sound that was similar to an angry animal growling. Jeonghan couldn't help but to laugh to himself. He may have just started a war but he didn't care. Even if he and Seungcheol didn't become a couple, he still refused to let Seungcheol get into a relationship with that girl. He cared way too much about the older boy to let that happen. Plus, it was nice to see the look of anger on Ara's face when she realized that she had some competition for Seungcheol's heart, and right now, Jeonghan was in the lead.

Jeonghan - 1; Ara - 0

 


A/N: Ahhhhh this chapter was a lot harder to write because I was completely stumped on what to do. Hopefully this wasn't too crappy lol

And thank you to everyone that subscribed/commented/upvoted!! You all really made me sooo happy! I can't even begin to explain how grateful I am! Like seriously, thank you so much for reading and liking my story!! I love you all sooo much! And please remember to comment on this chapter too! I always love hearing what you guys have to say! :D

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Comments

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inimeg19
#1
I hope you didn't abandon this fic... It's been ages since your last update... Pls come back...
hanietherealbeauty
#2
Chapter 25: You don't know how long I waited for this! Thank you!!!!!
_mims_ #3
Chapter 25: Congrats!
I'll always wait for the next update ;) This chapter was so cuuute! :0 <3
EUNKYEBIN #4
Chapter 25: That was 58562480 yrs... When u last updated
kaname30yuuki
#5
Chapter 25: ehhh five months....i didn't notice but the chapter is heart warming...
mashimar #6
Chapter 25: will always wait so just update when you can
inimeg19
#7
Chapter 25: Omg finally huhuhu the wait was worth it! Thank you for the sweet fluff and congrats on graduating!
AKTFDBSK
#8
Chapter 25: Congrats on graduating...you survived! And yay jeongcheol finally bit why all those missed messages and calls oh boy..
_mims_ #9
I love that fanfic please keep writing! <3
inimeg19
#10
Chapter 24: Pls don't abandon this fic :((((