Please read A/n at the end

i havent checked punctuation on this so here might be some errors.

Instead of doing a second half update I decided to put this in a different chapter so you don't have to scroll down to find where it starts :) 

Words in bold are thoughts 

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"I know it has Jongin and who's fault is that?", I replied back with a scowl.

I saw Jongin sigh as he relaxed he shoulders that I hadn't realised he tensed up in the first place.

"Look, I know you don't particularly want to see me right now and as I came to Korea with the others for holidays/vacation to see your auntie and uncle, I thought I'd come to see you to finally talk to you and get things solved", The man opposite me said as he sipped his coffee.

"what is there to talk about Jongin? And why do you want to see Auntie and Uncle? They don't even like you", I snarled.

"That's something I need to explain to you and why do you keep calling me Jongin?", he asked while stirring his coffee.

"Because I don't want you to be my father, you don't deserve to be called my father", I spat back.

"Son-", he started to say.

"It's Jisoo to you", I interrupted, I am not allowing that monster to call me that.

"Sorry. Jisoo, let me explain anything you want to know. I want to make it up to you, I want you to be able to be happy with your family again", He finished what I interrupted.

"I am happy with my family! I like living with Auntie Lisa and Uncle Bam Bam", I quickly answered back. Who is he to say I'm not happy with my family?

"I know but wouldn't you like to live with Jennie, Sammy and Kyungsoo? We could live as a proper family again, do family activities together and put the past behind us", Jongin says, looking at me in the eyes with guilt of what he's done in the past.

"Yes but no! I can never put what happened in the past behind me! you're the reason I don't live as a proper family member, it's you're fault mother died! And you expect me to move on from that?! I am not ing doing that!", I shouted at him whilst I stood up but quickly remembered I was in the coffee shop so sat back down immediately, checks flushed pink from embarrassment.

"Let me explain then and maybe I can change your mind?", He pleaded.

"Go on then, I haven't for all day", I replied back coldly. I haven't actually planned anything for the day as Jeonghan is visiting his parents and the others are in the practise rooms but he doesn't need to know that.

"Okay, where do you want me to start?", he asked with genuine sincerity in his eyes, the most genuine looks I've seen from his since he forever.

"From wherever, no actually from where your relationship with mum started to go downhill", I told him, I need to know his side of things regardless if he's lying or not. Because when his relationship with mother started to crumble, so did mine. I was forced to start a new life, here in Seoul while he could continue to live his old one wherever he was.

My father let out a sigh, "You were about 3 when the problem started".

"I was how old?!", I exclaimed. How could I have been three? Does that mean the problem had been occurring for longer than I thought? I thought it was only for about a year or so.

"Uh yeah...you were 3 years old. I'm sure you can calculate back that much to notice it was the same time Jennie was born.", My father continued awkwardly.

"Why was she given away then?", I asked back almost immediately. I hadn't realised I was now leaning in closer to him slightly as if I'm interrogating him... Okay not as 'if I'm', it's more like 'I am'.

"It was your mother, she couldn't handle it"

"Couldn't handle what!", I almost shouted back, trying to get answers out of my father, it's been too long and I deserve to know.

"Another baby Jisoo! Your mother... she had anger management problems and she drank a lot. However the anger management problem did die down towards when you got older. That's why I gave away Jennie before you knew she was born", he finally told me. 

"I had no idea my mother had any of these problems or that I had a sister, she never told me?", I said to him. I am so confused.

"But that's the thing So- Jisoo, she did!"

"What! How?!", curiosity filled my thoughts, she never said anything?
My father answered as if he could read my thoughts.

"She never told you about it verbally, she showed it though her actions", He said. " She would do simple things like abuse you a little physically however she would never direct it to you verbally"

"Huh? What do you mean by that? What physical abuse? She never hit me or anything and what are you about with the verbal thing? As far as I'm aware you were the one who shouted at mother and I and you're the one who would physically abuse me", I said firmly.

Why is he saying all this as if he's not the one who did anything wrong?

"No, you got it wrong. The bruise at the top of your right arm, you thought that was me didn't you? You thought I'm the one who hit you", I nodded because I don't know where he's going with this. "However, you've thought wrong all this time. It was never me...it was your mother who gave you that bruise. You were very young when she hit you and your memory of it happening probably isn't very clear, because I held you by the arm you must've thought it was me but it was to pull you away from your mother".

"Wait so let me make this clear, all the hitting and the bruise on my arm... It was all mothers doing? None of it was you? What was all the shouting that day then?", I was mind boggled by now, all this time I thought my father was the abusive one but it turned out to be my mother? No it can't be! He's lying?

"Yes Jisoo, I never hit you. I'd never hit you that's why I have away Jennie, I didn't want her to be hurt either. When your mother got drunk she'd start abusing you because she said you resembled me a lot in facial looks so being drunk she'd mistake you for me and start hitting you and the shouting? I'm surprise you remembered hearing all the shouting