I arrived at Sarah’s school just in time. The bell rang and all the children came running out. I saw a little girl with a beautiful smile running out. I remember how I used to be when I was six years old. How did I change from an optimistic and happy little girl to….this? She ran up to me and hugged me. “I missed you Janie!” “I missed you too honey. Did you have a fun day?” she smiled “Yes!” “I’m glad baby but we need to go home right now, I need to tell you something.”

We arrived at our house and I saw that my dad’s car was gone. I was happy that I didn’t have to deal with him. I opened the door and we walked in. “Do you want something to drink Sarah?” “Yes, I want some juice!” I gave her some apple juice and we sat down on the couch. “Janie? You said you had to tell me something?” I took a deep breath and started talking.

“Okay Sarah listen well. You know that daddy isn’t very nice sometimes right?” she nodded

“Well because daddy needs some time alone we are going to stay in a different country. That also means that we are going to go to different schools. I know it’s not very fun to change schools but it’s a very beautiful country and it will be better there.” She looked confused.

Please understand baby. It would mean the world to me if you want to leave with me.

“What country?” “South-Korea. We already know the basics of the language because we both take Korean lessons right?” She nodded and a smile formed on her face. “When are we going?” “We are leaving tonight but daddy doesn’t know so we’ll have to be very quiet. I will wake you up at 2 o’clock and then we’ll leave, okay?” She had a big smile on her face now “I’m happy to leave! I don’t like daddy.” Sarah can barely remember the man my dad used to be. She was 3 when my mom passed away so she only knows the alcoholic and abusive man. It hurts me that she only knows our dad as the monster he became and not the caring and loving man he was.

A huge smile formed on my face. Her eyes widened, probably surprised since I don’t smile a lot. “Janie is smiling! You’re so pretty when you smile! You should smile all the time Janie.” I jumped up and skipped over to the dinner table where my phone was lying. I put on a happy song and grabbed Sarah’s little hands. We danced, sang and laughed until we were too tired to continue. We plopped on the couch giggling.

It was the happiest I had felt in 3 years. Knowing that we are going to make it together. We’re going to pull trough.

I made dinner and placed the leftovers in the fridge for my father. I still care about him because I know he’s sick and he is not himself when he abuses me. I do hate him for what he does but I know that he is depressed and heartbroken. I know exactly how he feels. I know he feels as if he is drowning while everyone around him can breathe perfectly fine, except me.  I’m just as depressed and broken as him, I just handle it differently.

When we finished dinner I helped Sarah with getting ready. After she showered I tucked her in and gave her kiss on her forehead. “Sleep well my angel. We’ll be free tomorrow.” she smiles “Goodnight Janie.” I smiled back. I made myself ready and packed my last clothes. I decided to stay up because if I used my alarm clock my dad could wake up.

I looked at my phone and the time was 1:30 am. I silently went down stairs and searched for my dad’s coat. Once I found it I took out the money I needed and put the note I wrote on the coffee table. I went back upstairs and waited until it was 2:00 am.

I woke up Sarah and told her it was time. I helped her with putting on clothes because she was too sleepy. I then called a cab. It arrived and I took our suitcases and put them in the trunk. “Can you bring us to the airport?” I asked the driver.

We arrived at the airport early so I sat down on a chair and waited. Sarah sat on my lap but fell asleep quickly. I didn’t have anything to do so I started thinking about everything. My dad, my mom but mostly Jungkook. I felt like a horrible friend. I almost regretted not telling him anything about leaving but I knew it was for the better. How can I already miss him when I’m not even gone yet?

I heard on the intercom that my plane was boarding so I carried Sarah with me. I sat down in my plane seat and placed Sarah gently next to me. I buckled her seatbelt and put a blanket over her tiny body. I then buckled my own seatbelt and got ready for take-off.

I woke up from the turbulence. A steward came by and asked if I wanted something to drink. “I’d like some water.” I looked next to me and Sarah was still sleeping. I ran my fingers through her soft hair. The steward handed me a cup of water. “Here you go miss.” “Thank you sir.” I smiled at him. I was looking for a movie to watch when I heard my name being called. My heart started beating fast. I couldn’t look up because I was so scared, more like, terrified. “Jane! Look at me!” The smell of alcohol filled the air and I looked up. There he was. The only person in this world I’m scared of. Dad. He grabbed me and threw me in the aisle. “You think you can leave just like that!? Leaving a note saying I need help?” He started kicking me and cursing at me. He then picked me up and punched me back to the floor. He started shaking my body and I was so terrified I couldn’t move. I couldn’t talk. I had no idea what was happening. Why was nobody helping me?

“Janie! I need to pee!” What?

I open my eyes and see Sarah looking at me. I had another nightmare. Different than normally but I have a nightmare every time I close my eyes. I hugged Sarah tight. “Janie? I reaaaallyyyy have to pee.” I pulled back and said: “Okay then, let’s go” I was so happy she woke me up. She woke me up before dad killed me.  Even though it was only a dream it’s still a big fear of mine. Being killed by my dad when he’ll lose the little control he still has.

I took Sarah’s hand and walked to the toilet with her. After she finished we walked back to our seats and sat down. I looked at my phone and saw that we only had two more hours left before landing.  I decided to look at some old messages Jungkook had sent me.  

To: Janie

From: Weird dude next door

(Jungkook was my neighbour before he moved. When I moved there he was way too happy to have a new neighbour so I thought he was weird. I just never changed the name)

Janieeeeee I need youuu!

To: Weird dude next door

From: Janie

Jungkoooook, let me guess. You have to do the laundry and you forgot how the machine works.

To: Janie

From: Weird dude next door

Bingo! Don’t judge me it’s VERY complicated!

To: Weird dude next door

From: Janie

Fine I’ll come over, you’re such an idiot do you know that? You’re lucky that I love you.

To: Janie

From: Weird dude next door

YES! I love you tooooo! <3

I chuckled. He can be so stupid at times. I actually wanted to write “my happiness” as his contact name but I love to tease “The weird dude next door”.

“Tighten your seatbelts and get ready for the landing” I woke up Sarah “Wake up baby, we’re here!” She smiled and I tightened her seatbelt. I then did the same to my own and put my chair back in to its original position.

We walked around in the airport and searched for the exit. Once we found it we walked outside. It was snowing! I love snow so much because it makes me very happy. I might be depressed but snow makes me forget that for a few seconds. I grabbed my luggage in one hand and took Sarah’s hand in the other. We walked up to a cab and I told the address to the driver. I let out a shaky breath, I guess this is the beginning of our journey. 

Author's note: Tadaaa chapter three is here! This one is a litlle longer than the first two chapters. There are going to be some shorter and some longer chapters. I hope you enjoyed reading! Byee <3