A/N:  Well... long time, no see. I'm so, so, SO sorry for dropping off the face of the earth for so damn long. I'll give you an explanation at the end of the chapter but, for now, I hope you'll forgive me with this extra long chapter. There's some action and lots of emotions and even some couple stuff going on so I hope you enjoy.

Oh yeah, it's been so long since my last update that I suggest you reread the previous chapter because this one starts right where the last one left off... <3

Once Jin, Namjoon, Taehyung, Jungkook, and Rachel had finished gathering supplies, food, water, and gas from King Soopers, it took an additional half hour to organize and pack up the van. They had so many supplies that it was hard to fit people in the van. They even had separate supplies for David and Rachel tied to the top in large boxes that they had scrounged up from the grocery store. Jin was sure that, as long as they didn’t have to abandon their vehicle for any reason, they’d be set for quite a while.

“I think we’re ready to head back.” Jungkook stated as he secured the filled gas cans to the back bumper of the van. It may not have been the safest place for the gas but it was better than the chance of breathing in any vapors inside the van and the likelihood of a rear end collision was nil now that there were no other drivers on the roads.   

Taehyung, who had helped him, nodded in agreement. They climbed into the back of the van, the others already having gotten situated to depart. It took a little creativity finding seats as the vehicle was so full but once they found spots to settle, Jin started up the van and began to slowly roll out of the parking lot.

“We’ll have to unload the stuff from the top of the van before I can pull into the garage or we’ll be too tall to fit.” Jin stated, already thinking ahead to when they returned to the house. “Make sure to put everything far enough to the side of the garage so I can pull in once the top is cleared off.”

“We’ll have to watch for zombies too.” Taehyung spoke up. “There’s no way we can get all that unpacked without drawing attention.”

“As soon as we get there, Rachel, you can let the others know we’ve made it back.” Jungkook suggested to the girl. She had been abnormally quiet since the incident at the prosthetic shop, not to mention she was still wearing her pissed in shorts. Namjoon and Taehyung had questioned what had happened but he and Jin had told them to drop it at the time. For now, he wanted to give Rachel a chance to change her clothes and give David the legs she had risked her life to obtain without an audience. He also wanted her inside the house before they had to fight any zombies. He was sure she had had her fill for the day already.

Once plans were made, the van fell silent as the occupants watched out the windows of the moving vehicle. Luckily, Jin didn’t need directions back to the house since Rachel didn’t offer any, too ashamed to speak. The ride back took much longer than the trip to the store because they were driving at a much slower pace. It gave the zombies more of a chance to hear them drive by however and a better chance at being able to follow them even though their own pace was so much slower than the van’s. Before long, a rag tag following of dirty, bedraggled, gnashing zombies were lurching along in the van’s wake as they made their way back through town.

Finally, Jin was pulling into the driveway as he pushed the button on the remote to open the overhead garage door. As he placed the van in park and turned off the engine, the others were releasing the ties they had pulled through the open windows to secure the supplies on the top down. Then they were hurrying out of the back, clambering over boxes and squeezing through the doors.

Rachel had rushed out of the van and through the garage without a word as soon as the vehicle had stopped, the two long boxes held tight in her arms. She struggled slightly with the garage door into David’s kitchen but once inside she hurried towards the basement without once looking back at the others.

Meanwhile, the four men were unloading the top of the van as quickly as possible, constantly looking over their shoulders for danger. Namjoon tripped over his own feet when the first zombie approached, rounding the corner right next to him closest to the parked van. The box in his hands went flying as he tried to catch himself with his hands, a pained grunt escaping his lips as the concrete tore at his knees but before the zombie could reach for him, Jin was on it, plunging his knife into its eye and piercing its brain.

“Hurry. We’re drawing attention.” Taehyung hissed as he spotted another zombie rounding the same corner.

Jin was attacking again as Namjoon clambered to his feet, hastily tossing the spilled supplies back into the box he dropped and pushing it into the garage away from where the van needed to park. As the number of zombies seemed to multiply, Taehyung and then Jungkook joined Jin in the fight leaving Namjoon alone to finish unloading the top of the van.

“What’s taking so long?” Hoseok’s voice echoed through the garage but the situation was self explanatory once he got a good look. “.” he exclaimed, promptly joining Namjoon in freeing the top of the van of its load so it would fit into the garage.

“Thanks.” Namjoon huffed wholeheartedly as they finally got the last box down and pushed aside. “That’s everything.” he announced in a louder voice so the others could hear over their scuffling feet and the moans of more and more zombies.

“The keys are in the ignition.” Jin proclaimed over his shoulder as he took yet another zombie down. “Drive it in so we can close the door. We’ll wait until it’s half way down so we aren’t followed.”

“The door will open back up if anything gets in the way.” Taehyung added as he grappled with a zombie that had grabbed him by his dagger wielding arm. He kicked at it with his left leg but it had a strong grip on his bicep and was trying to pull him closer. He lifted his left leg again but instead of kicking, he pulled a second dagger from a hidden strap around his lower shin, stabbing the zombie under the chin and then again in the side of its head, finally dropping it.

As Namjoon pulled the van into the garage, Jungkook was standing guard next to it, assuring nothing snuck inside even as he fought the zombies rounding the corner of the house. Then he could hear the engine cut off and the rumble of the overhead door as it finally began to lower.

“Hurry!” Taehyung exclaimed as he finished off the next zombie he was fighting and then he was scurrying under the garage door, Jin tight on his heels.

Jungkook could see two zombies following after them, blocking his way through the door. Swearing under his breath, he managed to pull one of the crouching figures away from the door but the other one had already crawled halfway through. He drove his dagger through the back of the zombie’s skull but the door was too far down for him to fit through any longer. He assumed the others had killed the other zombie and pulled the body inside so it wouldn’t cause the door to open back up again.

“Kookie!” Jin screamed his name from the other side of the door, sounding frantic.

“Front door!” Jungkook yelled back, not wanting them to endanger themselves by opening the large door again. “Unlock the front door and I’ll meet you there!”

As Jungkook turned to run towards the front yard of the house, a large, cool, calloused hand closed around the nape of his neck. He let out a strangled cry of surprise as he tried to turn towards his attacker but the grip on him was too strong. He began thrashing his body in an attempt to break free, kicking out at the thing’s knees and pummeling it in the sides with his elbows as hard as he could but it was too strong.

Even as he fought, he was distantly aware of other zombies wandering closer and closer, zeroing in on him. Panic was beginning to cloud his senses and he couldn’t help but wonder if this was how Yoongi had felt the night he died. He could hear Jin’s voice calling his name but the putrid smell of rotting flesh filled his being as he tried to tell his love to stay back. He’d never forgive himself, even in his own death, if he was the cause of Jin’s demise.

Unable to break free and afraid to get his boyfriend hurt or killed by continuing his struggles, Jungkook closed his eyes, finally giving up the fight as he accepted that this was his end.

“Get. Your. Hands. The . Off. Him.” Jin’s strained voice gritted out in the back of Jungkook’s mind. Even in these dire straits, the cursing was such a surprise that Jungkook’s eyes snapped open. He could see the older man standing only ten paces away from him, a gun held steady in his hands and aiming high above his shoulders. Before he could comprehend what was happening, Jin pulled the trigger, an explosive bang ricocheting through the air.

The powerful impact of the bullet had propelled the zombie backward, a heavy thud sounding as it hit the pavement, Jungkook falling into it’s rotten lap. Then Jin was running forward, pulling him up by the hand and wrapping the younger man in his arms as he quickly led him towards the house. Jungkook was only just now aware of Taehyung covering them with his own gun from the open front porch, shots sounding off around the pair.   

As soon as Jin had led Jungkook into the house, Taehyung was closing and locking the front door behind them. He could hear low moans through the door followed by the sound of bodies pushing against it. “Let’s get the downstairs.” Taehyung urged the pair in a hushed whisper. He followed the couple through the living room and into the kitchen, sliding the door closed behind them. He could see Hoseok and Namjoon’s anxious faces waiting for them at the top of the stairs but cut off their questioning insisting, “We need to get downstairs.” again. His view of the two men was cut off as they did as he commanded, the sound of their feet bounding down the stairs reaching his ears. Then Jin and Jungkook were following them and finally Taehyung was closing the door and heading down the stairs too.

“Is he okay?” Hoseok asked nervously as soon as they were all down in the basement living room, nodding his head towards Jungkook.  

“I don’t know.” Jin answered, his voice shaking. Jungkook’s whole body was quivering in the elder’s hold, silent tears streaming down his face. “Did you get hurt?” Jin addressed his boyfriend, voice filled with fear. “Did he scratch you?”

Jungkook couldn’t find his voice to answer and had to shake his head ‘no’ in reply although he really didn’t know if he had been scratched or not. His whole body seemed to be numb. He had been so sure he was about to die that he didn’t know how to comprehend the fact that he was still breathing, that his heart was still beating.

His own hiss of pain broke Jungkook out of his stupor as Jin prodded at the back of his neck. Before he could utter any other response, the man was ripping his shirt over his head so he could get a better look at the back of his neck.

“You’re already starting to bruise but it doesn’t look like the skin broke.” Jin reported under his breath, as he ran gentle hands along the younger’s heated skin. Then he was turning the pliable young man towards him again, wrapping him up in his strong arms as tears of relief filled his eyes.

“I-I-I… I thought I was gonna die.” Jungkook finally found his voice, sobbing his words into Jin’s sturdy shoulder. “How am I not dead?”

As the couple cried together, a pair of arms wrapped around them followed by another and another until all six men were standing in the middle of the living room huddled together, tears flowing freely but the support of one another bound them all together in strength and love.

“So, uh…” David eventually interrupted the impromptu group hug, “I understand something big happened out there but, can anyone tell me why the hell Rachel came running through here like a tiger with its tail on fire and is now locked in our bedroom? What the happened out there?”

Jin looked towards the man who was still in his wheelchair but was lingering in the hall entryway by the kitchen like he had perhaps just come back from the bedrooms.

“Why don’t we all sit down before we fall down.” Jin suggested with a wry smile. He felt the arms around him loosen as his friends finally stepped back rather sheepishly. He quickly helped Jungkook back into his shirt and then he was leading the younger man over to the couch, sitting as he pulled him down onto his lap. They needed to talk but he wasn’t ready to relinquish his hold on his boyfriend just yet. Taehyung and Hoseok settled on the couch next to them, despite the tight squeeze, and Namjoon and Jimin sat on the floor nearby. David rolled his chair over to the group as well, staring Jin down as he waited for an explanation.  

“It seems Rachel had some plans of her own when we went out.” Jin began as he fought to regain his composure now that he was sure Jungkook was safe and unharmed. “There was a prosthetic store next to the grocery store.”

“A… prosthetic store?” David interrupted, blinking in surprise. “That’s not the closest King Soopers. Why the hell did you go there?”

“That’s where she led us.” Taehyung stated with a small shrug, sounding very matter of fact. “We don’t know this town. We just followed Rachel’s directions.”

“Okay, okay.” David huffed, trying to keep calm. He could already see where things were headed but he needed to hear it for himself. “So what exactly happened?”

“Tae and Joon headed to the gas station to fill up our gas cans while Rachel, Kook, and I went to the grocery store.” Jin explained. “Rachel was supposed to get supplies from the health and pharmacy sections while Kook and I split up to get food and water and whatever else from the aisles. We came back to the front of the store at about the same time but noticed that the cart we had given Rachel was still sitting there, empty. We went looking for her and Jungkook noticed her bag outside the prosthetic store so he went in. By the time I got there he was standing over two dead zombies and Rachel was shaking and crying. She never told us her plans or we would have happily helped her.”

“She wanted to get you your prostheses and leave a note for her dad telling him to hurry home.” Jungkook added in a quiet voice.

David rubbed at his brow, trying to figure out if he was angry, and at whom, or if he was more relieved that everyone was safe, or just saddened by the way the world had changed. He felt a little guilty as well for having voiced his disgruntlement at not being as mobile as he would like. His last prostheses had been rubbing his skin so, a couple weeks before the zombie outbreak, his doctor had prescribed an upgrade to prevent him from getting sores. He had a history of getting infections easily and they never liked to heal well.

“I’m sorry.” David finally addressed the group after thinking things through. “If I had known she would potentially put you in danger I would have insisted she stay here. I think I really need to go talk to her.” and with that, he wheeled himself back down the hallway.

“Wha-what happened to Kookie?” Jimin asked hesitantly once David was out of earshot. “There’s more to it than that.” Jin and Taehyung looked surprised by Jimin’s question while Namjoon placed a comforting hand on his thigh, squeezing lightly.

“We had to fight off a bunch of zombies while unloading the top of the van so we could get it into the garage.” Taehyung told him, his voice growing more and more animated as he retold the story. “Once we got the door shut Kookie was still outside so we found the front door to let him in but the biggest ing zombie I’ve ever seen had him by the neck. Like, holy ! He must have been an NBA basketball player or some . He was at least seven feet tall, at least! But Jin shot him while I held the rest back and now we’re safe again so everything’s okay, Chim.” he finished, trying to be reassuring.

Jimin had closed his eyes as Taehyung had related what had happened, slowly burrowing farther and farther into Namjoon’s side in search of his warmth and comfort. “I-I’m so glad you’re all back safe.” he whispered, a shudder wracking his body. The idea that he could have potentially lost Jungkook or the others had his heart skipping in his chest. He was sure he couldn’t live through any more loss.  

“It’s okay, Jimin-ah. We’re all okay.” Namjoon soothed, rubbing at the younger man’s back. He could feel Jimin nod his head against his shoulder, accepting the truth as Namjoon stated it.

“How are you doing, Jimin?” Jin asked the younger man as he comforted himself in the warmth and weight of Jungkook on his lap. Despite his earlier fears, he was elated to see Jimin joining in on the conversation and being cognizant enough to show concern for the others.

“I’m… better than I was.” Jimin stated as he sat up straight, fumbling with his fingers in his lap. “I’m sorry for everything I’ve put you all through. I know it wasn’t fair… nothing’s ever fair but, that’s not an excuse. Just, please know that I’m gonna try from now on. I can’t promise I’ll be okay but I promise to try.” It was too hard to look the others in the eye but he meant everything he said.

“Jimin-ah, no one expects you to be okay so soon.” Jin assured him. “You’ve been through so much. I’m proud of you for trying though. We could never ask any more than that from you and if you ever need to talk, we’re all here for you.”

“I-I know… thank you.” Jimin replied, tears of appreciation misting his eyes once again. His throat hurt from seemingly constantly trying to push words past the lump that seemed to reside there. He was mentally and emotionally exhausted from the effort.

“What now?” Namjoon asked the room at large, driving the conversation away from Jimin to give him some peace.

“Honestly, I had hoped to get on the road today but I think it’s too dangerous until the zombies outside disperse.” Jin stated thoughtfully. “After everything that’s happened today, I think we could all use some rest before we head out anyway.” he added, knowing Jungkook was in no position to handle the stress of traveling for the time being.

“I think I need to lie down for a while.” Jimin admitted timidly, looking every bit as exhausted as he felt after having listened to David’s tale of his grandparents and waiting anxiously for the others’ return. “You wanna come snuggle with me?” he asked Jungkook as he slowly stood to his feet, stretching his hand towards the younger in an open offer.

After a moment of hesitation, Jungkook nodded his head in reply, taking Jimin’s hand in his own trembling grasp and letting the elder pull him to his feet. They leaned against one another for support as they slowly made their way through the living room and kitchen towards the small bedroom Jimin had slept in the night before.

“Well, .” Namjoon murmured once the pair had left the room, scrubbing at his face with his hands. He was at a complete loss as to what to do with himself, feeling displaced for the moment even though he was glad Jimin seemed to be handling things better for the time being. Honestly, he was impressed. It had taken him months after the loss of his soulmate before he could even fathom functioning and almost a year of counseling after that before he was truly able to live again. Unfortunately, time to mourn properly had become a luxury that Jimin couldn’t afford in the world as it was now. He felt bad about that but was so thankful that Jimin was so strong.

*******

“Are you alright, Kookie-ah?” Jimin whispered into Jungkook’s ear as he held his larger frame tight in his arms on the small, pink bed, smoothing his fingers through the younger’s hair soothingly.

“I… really thought I was as good as dead.” Jungkook admitted as he tightened his hold around his hyung’s waist, burrowing his face into the crook of his neck and shoulder. “I still can’t believe that I’m alive.”

“Jin hyung loves you too much to let anything bad happen to you.” Jimin replied, the words bitter on his tongue.

“We both know love and life are two completely separate concepts.” Jungkook chided softly as he rose onto one elbow to look Jimin in the eye. When Jimin didn’t look convinced, he continued. “You know there was nothing you could have done, right? What happened to Yoongi wasn’t your fault.”

“He died saving me, Kookie.” Jimin argued back halfheartedly, trying but failing to hold back yet another round of silent tears. “I should have fought back. I should have killed Johnson before he ever laid a hand on Yoongi. But instead I just stood there. I let it happen. How am I supposed to live with that knowledge?”

Jungkook sighed. “You didn’t just stand there and you did try to fight but Yoongi hyung and Namjoon hyung knew how dangerous it was and they kept you safe. I’m sure Yoongi didn’t tell you because he didn’t want to hurt you but, he knew he wouldn’t make it out of the Pepsi Center. He and I spent a lot of time together in the sniper’s nest and I could see it in his eyes, hyung. He knew it was inevitable. I think he tried as hard as he did so that the rest of us would too. He knew he had to keep moving forward for you even though he also knew he was already lost.”

It hurt so, so bad to hear Jungkook’s confession but Jimin could hear the ring of truth to what he said as well. He took some comfort in knowing the others didn’t blame him for Yoongi’s loss even if he couldn’t do the same quiet yet. Maybe someday he could but, not yet. It was too soon.

“I… I can’t hear any more, Kookie. Please.” Jimin begged. “Just, hold me for a while? Please?”

Jungkook smiled, small and rueful, but did as Jimin requested unhesitatingly. His own near-death experience had drained him as well and soon he was drifting into a light sleep.

*******

Jimin awoke from his blessedly dreamless slumber to the feel of another body untangling from his own. He kept his eyes closed, not ready to face reality yet but his ears could easily track the sound of the person moving across the room.

“Kookie, you’re awake.” Jin’s steady voice drifted into Jimin’s ears from the hallway. He sounded relieved to see Jungkook.

“Yeah.” Jungkook replied groggily. “How long did I sleep?”

“Only a couple hours. Are you hungry?” Jin replied in his kind, nurturing way like always. It intensified Jimin’s guilt and he couldn’t help but to call out to him.

“Jin hyung?” Jimin’s voice was filled with gravel from just waking up as well as all the crying he’d done lately but when he opened his eyes he saw that Jin had heard him.

“Yes, Jimin?” he asked, not sure what the younger wanted him for but he entered the small bedroom anyway, eager to help in any way that he could.

Jimin sat up in the small bed, scooting to rest against the headboard. “I… I can’t remember a lot of what’s happened the last few days but…” his guilt forced his eyes away from Jin, watching his own fingers as they fidgeted with the hem of his t-shirt. “I-I know I hurt your feelings and I’m sorry.”

Jin sighed, having forgiven Jimin the moment he had jumped out of his reach back at the gun shop. It had surprised him more than anything else but, looking back, he knew he had been handling Jimin with kid gloves ever since. He didn’t know Jimin had noticed and he felt bad for his reaction.

“It’s okay, Jimin-ah. You’ve already been forgiven. I’m sorry if I made you feel like I wasn’t treating you like usual. I just didn’t want to upset you again.” Jin replied as he approached the younger man, sitting on the side of the bed with one leg bent so he could face him.

“Wha- what happened?” Jimin asked in a soft voice, his eyes finally meeting Jin’s.

Jin sighed again. He wasn’t sure how to reply. He was still afraid that he’d upset Jimin if they talked about his tattoo and he didn’t want to undo the healing Jimin seemed to finally be accepting.

“I’m honestly afraid to go into the details.” Jin finally admitted. “But, basically, you were upset and when I tried to touch you, you hid from me and, yeah, it hurt, but I knew then like I know now that you’ve been through so much and I never blamed you for your reaction, okay? It was my own fault for not thinking things through before I reacted.” He sounded so ashamed and contrite, Jimin wasn’t sure how to take it. It was a side of Jin he had never seen before and it made him feel slightly uncomfortable.

After a moment of thought, Jimin tentatively reached for Jin’s hands. Looking the elder in the eye he replied, “We’re both sorry, we’re both forgiven; can we move forward like nothing’s happened, hyung? Please?”

“Oh, Jimin.” Jin squeaked happily, pulling him into his arms. “You are such a special, sweet little boy.”

Jimin couldn’t help the small giggle that escaped at the elder’s antics. “Hyung.” He whined. “I thought I told you years ago that I’m not a little boy anymore.”

“Aigoo.” Jin chuckled, pulling back to squish Jimin’s full, pink cheeks. “You’ll always be a little boy to me.”

Having heard voices in the bedroom, Taehyung had made his way down the hallway and was watching from the doorway as Jimin’s nose crinkled in playful disgruntlement at Jin’s antics. “Hey, no fair.” he interrupted the other two with a wide smile. “Only I get to squish those perfect pudgy cheeks.” Even as he spoke, he was bounding across the small room, flinging himself onto his cousin’s back so he could reach Jimin’s face, squeezing a bit too hard in his enthusiasm.

“Yah, you’re worse than Jin hyung.” Jimin pouted, his words sounding slurred through his mushed lips. He had missed his best friend’s smile and, even though his heart stung with the feeling that it wasn’t right to smile or giggle or act even remotely happy, he was willing to do it to see that blinding, boxy grin.

“Ah, you know you love me, Chim.” Taehyung replied playfully, his eyes alight with pure happiness.

“Okay, Tae. Get off me and I’ll see what I can make for dinner.” Jin chided but he was smiling as well as he knocked Taehyung onto the bed so he could stand. “I’ll let you know when it’s ready.”

Taehyung didn’t seem to mind being pushed aside at all as he clambered up the bed like an excited puppy, squeezing between Jimin and the cool wall to sit propped against the headboard as well. As he wriggled in an attempt to get comfortable, he engulfed Jimin’s much smaller hand between his own, sighing in content. He had to scrunch down a bit to lie his head on his best friend’s shoulder, needing to feel him close, warm and finally living again. “I’ve missed this so much, Chimchim. It’s been forever since I’ve gotten to laugh with you.”

Jimin couldn’t help but roll his eyes, the comment immediately taking him back to their last run for the Pepsi Center when Taehyung had practically forced him into helping him break into an adult superstore hidden away between a sports bar and tattoo parlor, lewd jokes dripping from his tongue the entire time. He swore his friend was nothing more than an overgrown five year old in a adult body but he had also been thankful because it had helped settle the knots in his belly that were trying to pull him apart at the seams. He had been so nervous about the upcoming talent show but, as usual, his best friend had seen right through him and known exactly how to help.

“That was literally like, what, four days ago?” Jimin deadpanned, looking at the top of Taehyung’s head as he spoke.

“Mm, maybe so but it feels like it was a whole lifetime ago.” Taehyung replied, gently nodding his head in self-agreement. “Can… can I ask you something?” he asked in a husky whisper after a moment of comfortable silence, lifting his head so he could look his best friend in the eye, faces just a few inches apart.

Jimin couldn’t help but be apprehensive as he replied timidly, “Of- of course, Taetae.” He watched closely as Taehyung seemed to gather his thoughts, his tongue peeking out to wet his lips before he spoke.

“I don’t want to sound ungrateful or anything,” he began slowly, still sorting his thoughts as they slowly spilled from his slightly trembling lips, “and I know Namjoon hyung and I both talked to you last night but… what happened?” Taehyung watched Jimin’s brows pinch together slightly so he hurried to explain himself. “I mean, It’s so, so good to have you back and I hated  seeing you in so much pain but, I really don’t think hyung and I have that profound of an effect on you, especially with how lost you seemed to be.” Wracking his brain, he couldn’t find any better way to voice his thoughts so he just relied on his friend to somehow understand what he was trying to say like he always seemed to do.

“, Tae…” Jimin whispered, his eyes clenching shut as his mind was inundated with images of Yoongi, both memories of their time together as well as images from his vision. When he opened his eyes again, Taehyung was still so close, watching over him with concern. “It’s kinda hard to explain without sounding nuts.” he finally admitted.

Taehyung couldn’t help but grin. So many people seemed to think ‘nuts’ was his specialty, and not in the fun, , ‘ytimes’ way he preferred but he decided to run with the notion. “Yah, just look who you’re talking to.” he cooed. “You remember when Mr. Lee kicked me out of the classroom because he claimed I was being ‘disruptive’ for telling him aliens are real and living in our oceans? I still don’t understand why that’s so hard to believe. I mean, two thirds of the planet’s surface is water. We know less about our own oceans than our solar system. How is that so hard to believe?”

Jimin couldn’t help the small smile that tugged at the corners of his lips. ‘How is it that Taetae always knows just what to say?’ he wondered briefly.

“You and Namjoonie hyung kinda… I don’t know, ‘woke me up’?” Jimin began to explain. “I-I… I got really mad at you too, Tae, and I’m so sorry.” he admitted. “The thought that you could in any way understand what I’m going through made me so mad and I thought such horrible things. It wasn’t fair of me to think less of your own suffering just because it was different than mine. Can you ever forgive me?” Jimin looked pleadingly into Taehyung’s deep, dark eyes; they were fathomless just like the neverending depths of the ocean he had mentioned yet, instead of cold, murky darkness, he saw forgiveness and unconditional love and warmth in their dark chocolate expanse.

Taehyung responded by pulling Jimin into a fierce hug, trying to transfer all his emotions and boundless understanding into his best friend’s small frame. “It’s okay, Chim. I know that part of the pain too. I truly do.” he whispered, heartfelt and sincere.

Jimin clung to Taehyung, trying to force back his tears of gratitude. He was so tired of crying all the time but he just couldn’t help himself.

“I really, really don’t deserve someone as great as you in my life, Tae.” he sighed into his best friend’s shoulder.

“Of course you do.” Taehyung replied, grin evident in his voice. When he pulled away to look his friend in the eye again, Jimin could see the familiar sparkle of mischief as he continued. “I only surround myself with the best, you know. Not just anyone can handle all this awesomeness.”

“Mm.” Jimin agreed with a small giggle. “That’s still your story, huh?”

“Yep. It’s been true since forever and I told you back in high school that I’m sticking to it.” Taehyung waggled his brows playfully before turning more serious once again. “But, like I said, there’s more than just Namjoon hyung and me that got under your skin. I can see it in your eyes, Jimin.” he insisted with a small shrug.

“I had a... a dream? A vision? Some magical mixture of the two and maybe something else?” Jimin continued where his narrative had left off. “I don’t really know what to call it to be honest. You were there, and Namjoon hyung, and I could see all the pain and suffering I caused you both; the others too. And then, when the weight of realization was too much for me, when I couldn’t take the strain anymore and began to collapse, Yoo-Yoongi was there to catch me.” Jimin’s voice broke as he tried to form his soulmate’s name on his tongue. “He tried to reassure me and guide me forward and then he kissed me and it was so ing real. He… he shattered my splintered, broken heart so he could put it back together again, all the pieces finally in their right places. Only then was I able to promise him I’d try, that I’d live. He’s out there somewhere, Taehyung-ah. He’s still out there. But instead of fighting you guys and the rest of the world I’m going to wait for him. Even if that means I have to wait for our next life together.”

“, Jimin. Do you have any idea how strong and amazing you are?” Taehyung reflected in spellbound awe, not once doubting the reality of what his best friend professed. Jimin’s derisive snort in reply stopped him short for a moment and he could feel the frown that creased his own brow as a result. “Seriously, Jimin. I’m so ing proud of you. Saying this ‘isn’t easy’ is so much of an understatement it’s almost a sick joke but, here you are, fighting through it anyway. It takes strength and courage to even think about fighting your way forward; I know it does. It’s so much easier to just let yourself get lost in the abyss of agony. You helped me out of my own hell and I’ll do anything in my power to help you get through yours, okay Chim?”   

At a loss for words, all Jimin could do was nod in reply. He really did believe he didn’t deserve such a wonderful best friend but he’d take it. He needed all the help he could get in his struggle to survive not only physically but mentally and emotionally as well.

The shuffle of feet could be heard in the hallway and then Namjoon appeared in the open doorway. “Dinner’s ready.” he stated, looking between the two best friends. He tried to squelch the feeling of being on the outside looking in. He had felt it for far too long while he had tried to leave Yoongi and Jimin to themselves. Pushing the feeling aside with an almost inaudible sigh, he strode into the room feigning greater confidence than he felt, stretching his hand towards Jimin in offering. “Are you hungry?”

*******

Dinner had been loud and joyful as the eight participants gathered throughout the living room, plates perched precariously on knees as they all ate heartily. It seemed David had been able to help Rachel get over her funk and she spent most of the meal regaling her guests with stories of her high school shenanigans. It was evident by her bright smile and starry eyes that a large part of her returned playfulness had to do with David’s ability to join the others on his new prostheses, his own pleased smile also lighting up the room.

As they had eaten, Jin announced that they would be leaving for Boulder in the morning, assuming the zombies had gone back into hiding. Everyone seemed to agree to his plan, only Jimin remaining silent on the matter. In fact, he was mostly silent throughout the meal but his eyes remained clear and present and he even managed to crack a small smile from time to time at Taehyung and Rachel’s playful antics.

Not long after the meal, Taehyung had claimed he needed to ‘show Hoseok the van’ and the pair quickly disappeared up the stairs. It was clear to their four friends what he really meant and Jin couldn’t help but warn them to keep it quiet as they didn’t need to draw the attention of any zombies still in the neighborhood. Jungkook found himself biting his tongue on a snarky remark about not getting on the seats as well. Ultimately, they all knew it had been far longer than the couple normally went without their ‘alone time’ together and no one could begrudge them that. Especially since they knew it may be a while before they found somewhere safe enough for such activities again.

While Jin and Jungkook cleaned up the meal and washed the dishes with disinfectant wipes they had gathered at the grocery store, Rachel tried to talk Namjoon and Jimin into watching a movie with her and David. Namjoon could tell however, that Jimin had had enough social interaction for the day so he gently declined and led the other soulmate into the small bedroom they had commandeered over their stay.

Once they had finished cleaning up, Jin and Jungkook also excused themselves, heading upstairs to assess the number of zombies outside. They shared the silent but mutual hope to once again watch the sunset together as well. It had been a favorite activity of theirs at the Pepsi Center and as far as they were concerned, it had been far too long.

As they traversed the first floor, they could see through the windows that the numbers of zombies had thinned considerably and could only hope they’d all be gone by morning. Unfortunately, the house faced south so it was difficult to see the mountains and where the sun would set behind them on the horizon but Jungkook didn’t give up. Off the sparsely decorated living room was a set of stairs going up and he pulled Jin along behind him as he took the steps two at a time.

Across from the upper landing they found a bathroom and neither of them could help but voice how much they missed running water and hot showers, doubtful that they’d ever experience such an opulent amenity again. To the right of the bathroom were two doors, opening to two small guest bedrooms and to the left was a third door opening into the master bedroom. To their happy surprise, the side wall consisted of a sliding glass door that opened onto a small terrace facing the mountains.

“Finally.” Jungkook smiled, his hand placed against the smooth glass as if he could reach through it and touch the sky beyond. “I don’t know why but, somehow my day never feels complete without a quiet sunset and the view of the stars being unveiled. I missed that so much while living in Seoul while being a trainee.”

“Mm-hm.” Jin agreed with a hum. “There weren’t many stars to been seen in Seoul but I always loved basking in the glow of the moon. I love how transient it is; always changing, always moving as it arcs through the sky, sometimes even peeking through the pale blue of daylight. Even when I can’t see it I always know it’s out there somewhere, watching over me.”  

Jungkook turned his head, looking at the elder over his shoulder, taking in the wistful expression on his beautiful face. ‘I want to be your moon.’ he thought to himself. ‘I want to watch over you forever. You’re already my own personal star, blazing in my night sky for all of eternity.’

Jin smiled big and bright at him, unable to hide the small chuckle that trickled from his plump lips.

‘Uh, . Did I say that out loud?’ the younger man couldn’t help but wonder, his cheeks turning rosy red in embarrassment at the sappy sentiment.

“You did.” Jin confirmed aloud, his smile growing even wider although such a feat had seemed impossible to Jungkook until he saw it with his own eyes. “You’re so much more to me than the distant, desolate moon. You have been for so long now that I feel like nothing before you was ever even real. It was just a dream to tide me over until I met true luminescent beauty and eternal love.”

Jungkook returned Jin’s smile, starting out small and bashful but growing wider with each stuttering beat of his galloping heart. “You have a gift, hyung.” he replied, laughing softly at Jin’s confused countenance as he finally turned his body to fully face him. “No one else on Earth could turn such a cheesy line into something so perfect.”

“Ah,” Jin replied, returning Jungkook’s now cocky smile with a coy one of his own before doing a complete 180, joking, “It is a true talent, indeed.”

The younger man reached out his arm as if he was about to playfully punch the elder’s chest for his shamelessness but Jin got to him first, wrapping his arms around the younger’s waist and pulling him in close.

“You know you like it.” Jin teased.

“No need to push your luck, hyung.” Jungkook retorted, still smiling playfully.

The teasing glint faded from Jin’s eyes as he beheld the brightness of the descending sun wrapping Jungkook in a halo of light. He was ethereal, an angel sent to walk the earth, perfection and grace and enthralling splendor personified.

Before Jin could process what was happening, he found himself being pulled into Jungkook’s orbit, their bodies melding together and becoming one as his soft, pillowed lips met perfectly sculpted ones. The kiss began slow, still somewhat tentative and searching. Jungkook was the first to deepen it, breathing Jin in as he traced his lower lip with the tip of his tongue. Jin’s audible sigh at the contact gave him the confidence he needed to delve deeper, pushing past the elder’s full lips and finding his tongue with his own. The little mewls that left Jin’s throat as he swiped his tongue along his boyfriend’s, mirroring his growing fervor, were an aphrodisiac, lighting Jungkook’s blood on fire and draining him of his inhibitions.  

Jungkook’s arm was draped around the elder’s neck, his hand tangling into his boyfriend’s hair at the base of his neck as the other hand held onto his broad shoulder for support, his knees having gone weak and his head spinning. Eyes closed and head tilted, he explored Jin’s mouth, inside and tasting his exquisiteness like a fine wine and he was sure that he was drunk on the effect.

With a mind of their own, the younger man’s feet shuffled forward, trying to get closer and closer to Jin even though he was already as close as he could get without actually being inside the elder. Jin continued to compensate with small steps backwards so he wouldn’t tip over until he found the backs of his legs bumping into the solid mattress of the king size bed in the middle of the room.

“Jung- Jungkook-ah.” Jin breathed out, turning his head a little in an attempt to catch his breath. Both of their chests were heaving, oxygen having become a luxury neither of them wanted but both needed. “What- what are we doing?” he spoke again, voice low and trembling slightly.

“Living, hyung. We’re living.” Jungkook answered in a breathy whisper, sounding confident in his reply. In the back of his mind, he could feel the culmination of his near death experience pushing past his normally reserved nature and driving his need to taste all that life with Jin had to offer.

“I-I’m not ready for… for… .” Jin stuttered out, embarrassed and ashamed of his hesitance but simultaneously afraid things were moving forward too fast for him to be able to live up to.

“It’s okay, hyung.” Jungkook nodded in reply as he looked deep into Jin’s eyes, taking in his sudden bashfulness. “I don’t think I’m ready for yet either but, I just…” He could no longer hold Jin’s burning gaze, thoughts of death and destruction clouding his mind for a moment as he tried to find the right words to express how he was feeling. Once he was able to hold Jin’s gaze again he faced him and continued, “I know the world has never been a sure place. Anyone could have been taken from us at any time by anything; a drunk driver, an illness, a natural disaster but... the likelihood had seemed so slim, you know? And now, especially after already losing Yoongi and then I almost died too… each day is so dangerous but also so precious. None of us knows how much time we have left. Every moment has the potential to be our last, it’s like we’re already dead and we just don’t know it yet. We’re living on borrowed time and I want to use as much of that time as possible showing you how much I love you and how important you are to me. I don’t want either of us to be too busy trying to survive to actually experience life together. I want to live with no regrets and it would kill me to lose you without knowing I gave my everything to you. Does that even make sense?” Jungkook finally stepped away from Jin, turning back to the glass terrace as he ran his hands through his hair in frustration. He was sure his words weren’t doing his heart justice, all the sentiment falling short.

“Jungkook.” Jin called his boyfriend, voice filled with understanding and the desire to comfort. When the younger remained in place, unmoving, Jin slowly approached his turned back, stepping carefully as if he were afraid he’d frighten the man away. He gently pulled Jungkook into a back hug, his arms wrapping around his trim waist and his chin resting on his slightly shaking shoulder. “Jungkook-ah.” He tried again, voice barely above a calm whisper. “I love you too and I’m not going anywhere. I’ll always be here for you, I promise.”

“You can’t say that, hyung.” Jungkook negated through the lump in his throat. “You don’t know. No one does. Don’t make promises you don’t know if you can keep.”

Jin sighed, suddenly at a complete loss as to how to fix the melancholy mood. He wanted his happy, vivacious boyfriend back. “Jungkook, look at me.” he said in a firm tone, turning the younger towards him by the shoulders. Jungkook’s dark eyelashes were clumped together with dampness as he tried to hold back tears, the sight breaking Jin’s already fragile heart.

“My Jungkookie…” Jin whispered as he reached for his boyfriend, cupping his sharp jaw in both of his hands and caressing the rounded balls of his cheeks with his thumbs in unison. “I know how hard this world has become to live in and how uncertain the future is. It’s nearly impossible to look beyond the hope for each ‘tomorrow’ even. But, no matter what happens I promise, in life or in death, as long as you let me, I will forever live in your heart like you live in mine. I don’t make empty promises.” He searched the younger man’s eyes, looking for the moment true understanding settled in. When it did, it lit Jungkook from the inside out like a million scorching suns and Jin welcomed the all consuming burn with open arms. He didn’t even flinch when the younger man threw himself into his awaiting arms, crashing their lips together in a needy kiss.

*******

“Thank you, hyung.” Jimin addressed Namjoon as soon as they had left the others behind in the living room and were safely hidden away in the bedroom once more, the door shut firmly behind them.

“What for?” Namjoon asked, perplexed. Upon entry to the bedroom, Jimin had immediately wandered across the small room to sit on the edge of the bed, the elder left standing near the door, not sure what to do with himself once again.

“What for?” Jimin repeated, slightly dumbfounded. “What do you mean ‘What for?’ You’ve done everything for me these past few days, hyung. The little things like noticing when I needed to be alone or when I was feeling lost or uncomfortable and the big things like keeping me safe and alive and not leaving me even when I was being ty.

“I feel like I’ve spent my entire day apologizing but no one deserves to hear it as much as you do hyung. I’m sorry, Namjoon hyung. I’m sorry for everything. I’m sorry that my showing up at that airport took Yoo-Yoongi away from you. I’m sorry he and I didn’t talk to you about our feelings right from the start. I’m sorry you felt the need to alienate yourself from us. I-I’m sorry you lost him the same as me after the talent show. I’m sorry you felt burdened to take care of me, e-especially since you’re going through your own grieving. I’m sorry I made everything harder for you. I’m sorry I made you feel like you’re not enough or that I’d rather die than be with you. I’m sorry for each and every way I’ve hurt you, even for the things I don’t know I’ve done.

“So, thank you, Namjoon hyung. Thank you for the little things like saving me from having to try to be social just now, and for turning the conversation away from me when I can’t handle any more. Thank you for the big things like watching over me and providing for my well being. Thank you for talking to me and telling me how you feel even when I was too lost to appreciate what you were saying. Actually, your words were a big part of my ‘wake up call.’

“I do still love you, Namjoon hyung. I want to be here for you. I want to share this life with you, even though it’s so ed up. I want to finally be able to show you how much you mean to me and reassure you that you are enough. Your love isn’t something I’m just ‘putting up with.’ It’s not a choice between you or death. You are someone worth living for and moving forward with. You are worth all the love in the world and I’ll do my best to prove it to you every day.” By the end of Jimin’s emphatic and heartfelt triade, he had slipped from the bed onto his knees, begging for Namjoon’s forgiveness but unable to actually ask with words because he knew he wasn’t worthy of such a gift from the elder.

Meanwhile, Namjoon had listened in stunned silence. There were so many things he wanted to say but he couldn’t find his voice, or even move, for the longest time. Silence reigned in the small bedroom as he tried to grasp all that had been said but finally, his muscles unlocked and he fell to his own knees in front of Jimin, sitting on his heels so they were eye to eye.

“Jimin-ah.” Namjoon croaked, emotion choking his words at first. “Th-there’s no need to thank me and no need to apologize. I-I knew from the beginning what I had with Yoongi was supposed to be temporary. Being inexperienced with love, I deluded myself into believing it was just attraction at first. I thought I could handle ‘friends with benefits.’ It was never meant to be any more than that but, looking back, I loved him from the very first moment we met. Then you came along and scrambled everything even more… Not just because your were his soulmate but because I loved you at first sight too, even though it doesn’t make any sense.

“I knew I was hurting you both by shutting you out but I was so ing terrified that I wouldn’t be good enough for you or that you’d realize that I didn’t fit into what you two had together. I was afraid that you’d get tired of me and throw me aside. I’m the one who’s sorry that I caused you so much heartache and that I let my fears ruin what could have been. I will regret that for the rest of my life, Jimin.

“I-I don’t deserve your love. I-I’m not Yoongi and I’ll never be enough for you. I know that. I’ve always known that. But I will always be here for you in whatever capacity you need me to be. I want to live my life for you and give you every part of me that you’re willing to accept. I promised Yoongi I’d take care of you; that I’d keep you safe in his stead and I intend to live up to that promise. I’ll do it for him, for you, but also for me. I’m not losing you.” Namjoon had grasped onto Jimin’s shoulders as he spoke, his words impassioned and emphatic.

Somehow Jimin’s eyes had grown increasingly sad as the elder spoke and it was killing Namjoon to watch. He couldn’t understand why his words seemed to be hurting the younger when he was pledging his life to him.

“Namjoon-ah.” Jimin whimpered, pleading for him to comprehend. How could the blonde not understand that every disparaging thing he said about himself was like a slash to Jimin’s heart? He felt personally responsible for every doubt he had in himself. How could he make Namjoon recognize how much he meant to him? His words didn’t seem to be getting through to the elder but he knew he needed to try again.

“Hyung…” Jimin plead, reaching for Namjoon, cupping his face as he searched his very soul. “You have always been good enough. It may not make sense but he and I have always loved you the same as we love one another. You are a part of us and you always have been and will be a part of us. Just because you’re not Yoongi, doesn’t make you any less. If anyone’s lacking, it’s me. He and I were one whole and you are our other half. I love you, Namjoon hyung. I need you, now more than ever.”

As he spoke, Jimin continued to search Namjoon from the inside out, silently pleading that he would finally realize the truth of how he and Yoongi felt. That truth seemed to dawn on him in slow motion like a hidden ember in the depth of his heart that first began to smolder before finally flickering into a small, wavering flame. Each word he spoke fanned the fire until it finally grew and then quickly began to rage inside the blonde.

Only when he was sure Namjoon truly understood did Jimin let himself lean towards the man, pulling him forward as well, his hands still cupping his face gently. “Kiss me, hyung.” he whispered, his warm breath ghosting along Namjoon’s full lips. “I need to feel you. Please. Show me you understand.” And then he connected their lips, drinking the elder in.

All thought flew from Namjoon’s head as he drown in the feel of Jimin’s plump lips and the sensual of his probing tongue. He opened himself to the younger man, searching the depths of his luscious mouth as he wrapped his arms around his muscled frame, pulling him closer.

Jimin threaded his fingers through Namjoon’s silky locks, pulling as he angled his head more to the side, devouring him as his need to feel more of the elder grew. The fire within Namjoon quickly spread through Jimin as well, his heart skipping in his chest as desire consumed him.

“More.” Jimin moaned, needing to be touched everywhere the flames of passion flared. Namjoon obeyed the command without thought, sliding his hands beneath the younger’s shirt, his fingertips tracing along the hills and valleys of his ribs then the ridges of his spine as he tried to touch him everywhere he could reach. He began to shake as Jimin’s lips left his own, trailing along his jaw to his ear, and laving at the sensitive skin as his hands roamed down his neck and shoulders, over his chest and quivering stomach, and finally reaching the hem of his shirt. In a flash, Jimin wrenched the shirt over the elder’s head, tossing it aside to join the other discarded apparel that littered the floor.

“Off. Please, hyung.” Jimin begged nonsensically as he kissed along Namjoon’s neck to his collarbones, biting and gently to leave his mark in his wake. It took a moment for the elder to comprehend the request but once realization dawned, he slowly raked Jimin’s shirt over his head, tossing it aside without a care so he could fill his hands with smooth, soft skin once again. He had barely gotten Jimin in his grasp before his head was falling back in pleasure, Jimin having led his into his heated mouth, tonguing at it with deliberate that coaxed a drawn out moan from his parted lips. Namjoon was dizzy with pleasure, his heartbeat thrumming in his ears and all sense of the world around him lost to the sensation that was Jimin.

“Bed.” Jimin commanded next, his knees aching slightly even in his lust filled stupor. He reluctantly broke away from Namjoon’s cloying skin with the promise of a swift return. Then he was propelling himself to his feet, grasping at the elder to pull him along with him. Even through the haze of his lust, he could see Namjoon’s hunger clouded eyes transform from confusion to clarity and then reluctance.

“Ji-Jimin.” he stuttered out, as he tried to reign in his desire. Things were moving so fast and he couldn’t help but be concerned that this wasn’t what Jimin would want once he had a clear head. Despite his reticence, Jimin had managed to pull him to his feet and was now gathering him in his strong arms and tipping back onto the bed. They landed with a small bounce, Namjoon on top of Jimin, the latter’s arms wrapping around him in a firm embrace. It was a struggle for Namjoon to lift his head far enough from the younger to look him in the eye as he tried to reason with him. “I-I don’t think this is a good idea, Jimin-ah. It’s too soon for you. I don’t think you’re ready.”

“I am ready.” Jimin argued back. “Do you have any idea how long I’ve wanted this? How long I’ve needed to feel you here with me? Don’t tell me it’s too soon.”

“What… what about everything that’s happened?” Namjoon replied, sounding lost and helpless. “You’re not over Yoongi. In fact, this is the first day you’ve even been cognizant since then. I don’t want to take advantage of you; I love you too much. I won’t do anything to hurt you, ever.”

“If you don’t want to hurt me, make love to me, hyung. I need you. I know it’s not fair to ask this of you but, I need to feel. I need to know you’re here for me and that happiness still exists in this world for me. Please, hyung. Please. Fill me up, make me whole again. I need you inside me, now.” Jimin’s eyes misted with tears as he spoke, Namjoon’s heart weakening more with each syllable that breached the younger man’s pleading lips.

“Jimin-ah…” Namjoon whispered brokenly. “What if you wake up tomorrow regretting this? What if you end up hating me?”

Jimin closed his eyes for a moment, trying to hold his heart together as he warded off the feeling of rejection that was trying to swallow him whole. Once he felt like he wouldn’t fall apart, he pushed Namjoon to the side so he could sit up. The elder followed his lead, facing him as they each sat with knees bent on the small bed. “Namjoon,” he began as he took the other’s hands in his own, voice steady and strong, face serious. “I want you to look me in the eye, hyung. I need you to see that I’m not letting the moment dictate my actions. I’m not asking for this on a whim or in a daze of passion. Search my heart and soul and see that I love you and I need you and only you can do this for me. Only you can complete me. Only you can be a balm for my pain. Only you can show me how to live again. I. Need. You. Can’t you see that?”

Namjoon studied Jimin unblinkingly. He could tell that the younger man was resolved; that he truly believed every word he was saying. He could also see the love in Jimin’s eyes and the sadness that dwelled within him. With a shuddering breath, he accepted what Jimin had said as truth. Then, he leaned forward once again to connect his lips with the younger’s, for better or for worse. He’d accept whatever would follow; breach any hurdle placed before him. He would do anything for Jimin.   

A/N: Like I alluded to before, a LOT happened this chapter. Jungkook scared the out of me! I'm so glad he's okay... and that there near death experience lit a lil romantic fire under his *waggles eyebrows suggestively* Hehehe

And speaking of romance... In case you didn't read between the lines, Nammin finally did the deed. There's a reason I didn't go into the details though, sorry to disappoint. If you remember the beginning of the fic, I didn't go into details when Sugamon did the deed either. 

As for my long absence, I no longer have internet at my house *cries ugly sobs of agony* I can't even get to my google docs to write without internet and I've been going crazy. It's absolute HELL!!! I have no idea when or how I'll get the internet back either so updates will be spotty at best for a while. I'll try to get to the library or McDonald's or wherever else I can find with free wifi as often as possible. 

Thank you so much for sticking with me through this long process. I appreciate each and every one of you who has undertaken this arduous journey with me. Please subscribe for updates and leave me an upvote and comment. I'll answer as soon as possible. XOXOXO