Author’s Note: Just wanna say: I got a writing spree and just finished this in like ten minutes

Also: I know I wrote about Vernon in 2016 by Christmas but I didn’t learn who he actually was until like six months later

THEMAN started a group chat with everyone except Carrotae

CaringEomma: you better not have done something bad

THEMAN: well...

Mintsundere2: to be honest, we all know this is something bad

dancemonster: or a surprise-something for Tae

jhooooope78: I am hoping for the surprise

THEMAN: well, it's kind of both...

Mintsundere2: just tell us!

THEMAN: but! Like-

CaringEomma: If you've bought a jet and are now asking us where to hide it, I will personally fill it with rice

dancemonster: that was awfully suspicious

dancemonster: but I like rice

jhooooope78: please let us just solve this, then we can eat rice and be in love

CaringEomma: but you have Vernon right?

jhooooope78: yeahhh...

THEMAN: hyungs, I will tell you

BorninBusanfirst: AGHHHHH!! THIS PILLOW MOVED

BorninBusanfirst: WHAT IN THE WORLD

CaringEomma: please calm down, where are you Jimin?

BorninBusanfirst: I am in my room

THEMAN: WAIT what color is that pillow?

BorninBusanfirst: like marbly-light and dark brown OMG IT'S NOT A PILLOW

dancemonster: what in the world is happening

Mintsundere2: I am just going to stay in here and just not give a care in the world

THEMAN: DON'T TOUCH IT

BorninBusanfirst: HOLY POTATOES IT HAS EARS

BorninBusanfirst: I think my final moment is about to come. Jesus takes the wheel

jhooooope78: stop joking around and Jimin stop being so loud

THEMAN: OKAY HYUNG it's a rabbit

dancemonster: a rabbit?

CaringEomma: did you buy a rabbit? Why?

THEMAN: you're not mad?

jhooooope78: the parents aren't mad at Jungkook, what alternate universe is this

CaringEomma: I mean, a rabbit isn't much

dancemonster: yeah

THEMAN: okay

BorninBusanfirst: WHY'D YOU BUY A RABBIT AND WHY IS IT IN MY ROOM

Mintsundere2: why, just why, Kooks

THEMAN: it's for Taehyung and I just wanted to tell all of you

Mintsundere2: why are you giving him a pet so suddenly, we have a tight schedule u know

THEMAN: I know, but I figured Tae could keep good care of it anyways

BorninBusanfirst: you're sweet but even with how cute this rabbit is, I am still afraid

Mintsundere2: oh come on! How can one be afraid of a rabbit??

BorninBusanfirst: they are wayy too suspicious

THEMAN: okay, so it's in your room?

BorninBusanfirst: yes, COME FETCH IT BOI

Mintsundere2: what the

BorninBusanfirst: MWUAH

Mintsundere2: okaaaay...😐

30 minutes later

jhooooope78: okay, when will you reveal the gift

Mintsundere2: it’s not like he can keep it a secret until Taehyung’s birthday, it’s Jungkook we’re talking about

BorninBusanfirst: ...

BorninBusanfirst: where’s Jungkook with a snap

CaringEomma: I swear to God if he actually would have bought a jet

jhooooope78: and how in the world would he AFFORD a jet

dancemonster: nobody knows

CaringEomma: I seriously need rice

BorninBusanfirst: we need Jesus

THEMAN: hyungs. I lost it

BorninBu