Chahye and Dean left the mansion just as the other men came back. Chahye didn't want to spend another minute with her father. It made her head hurt and she was uncomfortable.

"Your father looks like a good guy," said Dean just as the car passed over the bridge back to Mapo-gu.
"Maybe. I don't know," she answered.

Dean took a glance at her as she looked out the window, passing through the busy streets and people.

"You were holding him when you came down the stairs."
"He's old. He has a cane. He needed guidance."
"I thought it was sweet."
"Shut up, Dean."
"Hey... Come on. I thought you'd be like one of those girls in dramas who cry tons when they meet their real parents in person."
"There's a reason dramas are fantasies, Kwon Hyuk. Not all of it are true."
"But still... I admire you."
"I didn't cry but I fainted. That's different."
"I'm sorry for not avoiding that. I haven't actually asked your cousins how to deal with you in occasions like that."
"You make it sound like I have epilepsy or something."
"No. I mean... I know they're the only ones that can calm you down so I didn't know what to do."
"You'll learn it. Maybe."
"Why were you crying anyway? Did you feel violated? Is that why you chose to stay near me and Mr. Lee? You should tell your father about it so he knows."
"It's not about him touching me."
"Then what?"
"I... I don't know."
"What do you mean you don't know?!"
"I just don't know, okay?! God, Kwon Hyuk! You're making my head hurt even more!"
"I'm just asking."

The car in front of them suddenly came to a full stop and Dean had to hit the brakes hard. "Damn, that was close!" he blurted. The stop light was red and people were crossing the street.
"Aish. Concetrate on the road, Dean. You always almost get into trouble when you talk to me in this car," said Chahye sitting upright again.
"I'm sorry," said Dean. "So what were you saying? About him touching you?"
"I don't know, okay?!" said Chahye crossing her arms in front of her. "I... I wasn't scared. It was just... I... I thought I saw my mom," she said.
"What?!" exclaimed Dean. "Like... A ghost?!"
"Stupid. No," answered Chahye. "I... My mind went blank and all of a sudden, I saw my mom. I saw an old man and it was dark. Then I started to get scared. I think that's when I started shouting," she said.
"You don't remember what happened after?" asked Dean.
"Next thing I knew, I was on that bed. And he was watching me from his chair," she said looking back outside as the car started to move again.
"Didn't you say you have a doctor you visit? Does she understand that? Why don't you go get an appointment?" suggested Dean.
"I don't need her," said Chahye starting to get irritated.
"I think it would be better," said Dean.
"What exactly do you think of me, Dean?! Do you think I'm some mentally retarded person that needs a shrink all the freaking time?!" shouted Chahye.
"Why are you shouting?!" responded Dean.
"The . You are annoying me!" exclaimed Chahye. "I will visit a doctor when I want to. You don't need to meddle with stuff like that... Stuff you don't even know anything about!"
"Jin Chahye, I'm just trying to help you out. I worry about you," he said, trying his best to not shout back at her.
"Shut up. I don't need you," she said crossing her arms again.
"I know half of your story already, Chahye. They told me," admitted Dean.
"WHAT?!"

Chahye opened the door to the car even before Dean could park it properly. "What the..." he grunted as he watched the door close. He removed his seatbelt and got off, following Chahye to the building. "What the is your problem, Jin Chahye?! You've been acting all weird ever since we left the mansion!" shouted Dean.
Chahye quickly turned around and faced him. "You! You're my problem!" she shouted.
"How am I your problem?!" he shouted back.
"Look. I have problems. I have problems you don't even know about. I may be your girlfriend but my problems are mine. I share some to you because I trust you and no one else should know. No one else should know about it. ! Just stay out of this, Kwon Hyuk! Don't go talking about my doctor. Don't go talking about my father, my family, Jeffrey, my lawyer, no one! You don't know anything about it so just stay out of this!" she said.
"Well... Let me just remind you, Jin Chahye. You're my girlfriend and your problems are mine as well. I thought we're already good about this. What the is the matter with you?!"
"EVERYTHING! EVERYTHING IS WRONG WITH ME! Do you understand?! I'm trying to make my life better, Kwon Hyuk and it's hard. All I ask from you is to keep out of things you shouldn't be meddling with. It's for your own good anyway."

She stared long at Dean before turning around and walking up into the building. Her head started throbbing and it felt as though it could crack anytime. She needed some sleep. Dean was left there dumbstruck at his girlfriend's sudden mood swing.

"What is actually her problem?" thought Dean as he stomped his way back to his car. He kicked on rock he saw on the pavement and grunted. "I shouldn't have mentioned about the guys telling me her story. ."

~

Monday came and Chahye refused meeting with Dean. Crush brought him to work that morning.

"Dean has a thing with caring about other people's problems, especially with people he loves. And that includes you. That's just how he is, Chahye. Give him a break," smiled Crush before leaving a kiss on her forehead and leaving.

She couldn't understand herself but after her encounter with her father, she started feeling uneasy. Her headache yesterday led her to a deep slumber that eventually woke herself up with dreams of darkness. Rather than her usual fits with nightmares, the dream last night just led her to a darknes that suffocated her, as though she was drowning in an ocean. It bothered her but she tried hard to forget about it in the meantime and concentrate at work.

Her supervisor dismissed the interns esrly that day. She wanted to eat lunch but didn't know where to go. She grabbed her bag from behind her desk and stood up to go, checking her phone to try and call Byul, see if his class was already over. One of the girls from her literature class came running to her just as she opened the door of the concept office. Her name was Minah, an English major as well.

"Chahye-ssi. There's a man at the lobby looking and waiting for you," Minah said.
"Uhm... Who is it?" she asked in return, feeling a slight hesitation for her actions.
"I didn't ask. The security officer just mentioned it to me. But I saw the guy. I think... I think he's already in his 30's or something," the girl answered.
"Ah. I see," said Chahye. "Can you... Can you walk with me there?"

Chahye went to the lobby with Minah. Her visitor stood up at the sight of her and smiled. Chahye held Minah's hand and told her to go ahead. Minah looked one more time at her visitor and smiled at Chahye before walking away and out of the office. Chahye looked back and bowed.

"I'm sorry for not giving you a heads up about me dropping by," apologized Jeffrey in English.
"Please don't do that again. The next time this happens and I would probably lock myself in the office," said Chahye in the same language.
"I understand. It was foolish of me," he answered.
"What brings you here, by the way?" asked Chahye.
"Lunch?" he said.

Jeffrey brought her to a fine American restaurant in Itaewon. According to him, a friend of his back in New York owned it. The two chose a table at the far end for their privacy. Jeffrey chose steak for both of them and a serving of pasta and cream of mushroom soup.

"Anyone supposed to pick you up today?" asked Jeffrey just as the waiter left.
"Excuse me?" asked Chahye.
"I know someone brings and picks you up from your office everyday. I had Dean admit it to me once," he said.
"Oh. Right. Uhm... Well... I usually get off work at around 3 in the afternoon so I don't know who would pick me up," she answered.
"You should have told Dean. He's free all afternoon," he said.
"I... I really don't want to see him right now," said Chahye shaking her head.
"Are you two all right?" asked Jeffrey.
"Yeah. It's just... I don't know. I sort of shouted at him yesterday," said Chahye with a sigh. "I... I'm sorry. I shouldn't be telling you this," she followed.
"No. It's fine. Tell me. Dean is like my brother. And you... You really are my sister, you know," smiled Jeffrey. But Chahye didn't answer. "Right. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that," he followed.
"No. It's... It's fine. You're right anyway," smiled Chahye.

The waiter came back and brought them their drinks and soup to start. Jeffrey waved him off and they continued their conversation in privacy.

"Chahye... I hope what you learned yesterday didn't shock you."
"I had more shocking realizations in my life, Jeffrey."
"Oppa. Call me oppa."
"I... I don't really do that."
"Oh. Okay. I guess it's going to be all right for now. But once you start living with us, you would really need to get used to calling me oppa."
"I won't live with you."
"You're just saying that because we just all met."
"I'm serious."
"Chahye... Is that really hard to think about it?"
"When did you find out about me?"
"You didn't even answer my question."
"Because I don't want to so let's start another topic."
"Do you usually do this to everyone?"
"Sort of. You should ask Dean."
"No wonder he likes you."
"Answer my question."
"Oh. So you don't like changing your topic eh?"
"I told you. Me and Dean are not in good terms. I don't want to talk about him."
"Okay. Okay. I've always known about you. Dad has a photo of you in his wallet. He talks about you. You're everything he's been thinking about for 12 years now. I knew he was looking for you. I just didn't meddle with it. I found out about you the third day you became our dancer. I don't handle talent recruitment at Joombas so I had no idea what you looked like."
"But you saw my name."
"And Koreans usually have the same names. How am I supposed to know it was you? The same Jin Chahye my Dad shares stories of?"
"How did you know it was actually me?"
"You had the same eyes as your mother."
"How do you know?"
"I met your mom back then."
"Really?"
"Yes."
"When? Was she beautiful?"
"A long time ago. Why ask if she's beautiful? Don't you remember her?"
"Uhm... Barely..."
"I understand. Well. She is. But I guess you grew up more lovely than her."
"Thank you."
"You're welcome."
"But how come you never approached me when you saw me at Joombas? That third day."
"Look. My dad was the one looking for you. Even though Junyoung told us a lot of stories about you, I still wanted to see what you're made of. If I could trust you. If you were the same person Junyoung says you were."
"Did I live up to your expectations though?"
"Greatly, yes. Truthfully, I feel proud to have a sister like you."
"Nothing about me is worth its pride."
"Don't think like that."
"If you feel that way, why did you react like that when you learned about me and Dean?"
"Your relationship?"

Jeffrey shut his mouth again just as he saw the waiter approaching their table. They were served the white pasta they ordered with a serving of mashed potato for each of them. Chahye tasted it quick and flashed a thumbs up at the waiter as he bowed and walked away. Jeffrey looked at her smile and he couldn't stop but smile back.

"Everything's tasting good huh?"
"Oh yes. It's been a while since I ate mashed potato. Thank you, Jeffrey."
"You're welcome."
"Now answer my question."
"Oh. Right."
"I don't forget stuff, Jeffrey."
"I can see that now. Well... If you mean that day I went to Dean's place and you were there... I reacted that way because it was pissing me off."
"Why?"
"I don't know if Dean has been very honest with you... I'll ask you not to tell him I told you this okay? I've been handling Dean's activities in both America and Korea for two years now and I see him. I watch him. I know him. When he says in his interview that he's a flirt, he really is. I can't blame him. He's an awesome guy. But every now and then, he gets involved with girls that are too problematic until the time that he, too, has become problematic as well. Drinking, smoking, clubbing, girls, name it. He probably has done it."
"Even weed? Drugs?"
"Oh. That's a story we need to talk about somewhere else."
"I always suspected he tried it before... Especially since he's friends with Keith. You know. But everything you told me, Dean already has."
"Then good. You know it then already. He plays girls. And most of the time that gets him in trouble. Deadlines. Hangovers. Late agendas. Name it. He was even seen kissing some random girl back then. And as a manager, that's some bad for me."
"He really was a bad boy then."
"He was."
"He once told me, you were the reason he stopped smoking."
"Yes. Sort of. But it was really damaging his voice and you know when you're a singer. You gotta protect that."
"I understand."
"I guess... As a manager, seeing him with another girl meant problems for me, especially when he brought her back to his house."
"I agreed to go with him."
"Which surprised me all the most. As a brother, do you think it's fine with me to see you in another guy's house?! Of course not! And as someone who knows your story... At least part of it, I was shocked you were there. Can you imagine my rage that day?!"
"Dean never told me you were mad."
"I didn't show him my anger. I didn't know if he was aware of your story so I just let it slide. I just showed him my anger as a manager. Not as someone related to you. I would have suggested your termination all at once."
"But... You already knew I was in a relationship with him. Why didn't you file for my termination then?"
"Because I told you. I don't handle recruitment and I don't manage you, the dancers. Kim Minjung handles that. We needed dancers. And besides, I see how Dean's crew likes you, too. I can't go against that."
"I like them."
"They're good kids."
"Yeah."
"Does Dean know? About you?"
"My story?"
"Yes."
"Do you?"
"Uhm... Only a few excerpts, I guess. Mostly from your lawyer."
"Congratulations. You know more than Dean does."
"What exactly does he know?"
"That night. That's all he knows."
"Just that?"
"Yes. Then some of my life in Japan and Canada. Highschool. University. That's all he knows. And it's not even everything."
"Why keep secrets to him? He's your boyfriend."
"The same reason I don't want to live with your father."
"What?"
"I have trust issues."
"Dean's your boyfriend and you don't trust him?"
"What is the real reason you brought me here, Jeffrey?"
"Excuse me?"

The waiter came back with their steaks. Chahye asked for another glass of water and smiled. They both head on to eating, waiting for the waiter to come back. When he came back with a pitcher of water, Jeffrey asked for a cup of their best ice cream to be served once they were done.

"Answer my question. Why bring me here?"
"Lunch."
"Bull."
"Watch your mouth, young lady."
"Look. I have trust issues, okay?! You said you know my story? Then you know why. I trust Dean, yes. But to only a few truths about me. I love the guy. It's the first time I felt this kind of butterflies in my stomach and I like it. But I don't know how long this would last. I want to but I don't want to struggle yet, especially not now when I already met your father."
"Our father."
" that."
"Does Dean know that? You being unsure of your future?"
"He should have probably known that by now. Nothing about the future is sure."
"You sound so deep and dark compared to how lively you look like in front of people."
"Live my life and you'll know that the way I'm talking right now is nothing deep and dark yet."
"I understand."
"No. No one actually understands."
"I met with you today to talk about Dad. About yesterday."
"What about him? Is he all right?"
"He's fine. He went to Daegu today but would probably be back tomorrow."
"Do you visit your farms there?"
"I don't usually. I just visited thrice this past month. Youngsoo handles the business there."
"I see."
"I just wanted to say that, Dad is already an old man and he badly needs some company every now and then."
"So?"
"Well... I don't know. I just wanted to say. Old people. They become annoying as they get old and dad is already 74 years old. Still strong but you know the little pains they experience already."
"I hope he had an amazing childhood."
"He must have. Barely."
"He was already alive when the war started."
"He was."
"."
"But he managed to live from the ground up. He has a lot of businesses. He's rich."
"That's great."
"Chahye. I'm not joking around."
"Neither am I so stop beating around the bush. What's your point?"
"My point is... I don't know if you're up for it. But now that my father has known you, he would probably come to you sooner or later, offering you to oversee some of his businesses."
"What? Why don't you do that?! You're the one with the experience. Not me. I'm not interested."
"That's the reason I have as well. I'm also not interested."
"How come?!"
"It's just not my style, okay? It's bothersome."
"And what do you expect from me?! I'm still in university and doing internship. I'm not even a business major."
"And that's why I'm telling you this. Just a heads up."
"Why?! Why aren't you interested? I mean, shouldn't you be happy he's entrusting his fortune to you? Even if you can't handle it, you can employ people to do the job."
"Look. I'm just really not interested, okay? And I don't really plan to live here in Korea anymore. I want to stay in America."
"Why?"
"Because my mom is there."
"Are they still together?"
"Mom and Dad? No. They've been divorced for 12 years now."
"Because... Of me?"
"Slightly, yes. But generally, no."
"Explain."
"Really now?!"
"Come on. I thought you're starting to treat me as 'family' now?"
"Aish."
"Watch you mouth, Mr. Jin."
"I'm a Yoo now, my mom's surname."
"Oh. Right."
"I guess this is something you don't know yet but your mom... She worked as my dad's secretary in the construction firm we had. Later on, Dad recruited her to become his secretary in the JGC, Jin Group of Companies."
"Secretary? When?"
"For as long as I know."
"I... I didn't know that."
"Well, your mom wouldn't have actually been able to tell you anymore. But I think your aunt would know about it."
"How did you know about my mother then?"
"She was his secretary and we usually went to parties with her back then. Social parties. My mom would deny her presence because she was really beautiful. But rather than thinking she was Dad's mistress, everyone thought she was my older sister. I went to America with my mother for my elementary and highschool education. I think that was also the time she became pregnant."
"Nice timing."
"Dad's a smartass. So anyway, he made you live with him until I think, you were 4 years old. My mom said we were to visit because she was suspecting Dad had an affair with your mom. She wasn't wrong but he never admitted it."
"And she found out?"
"She later found out because of the house servants. But he still didn't admit it. Mom already had enough but since they weren't really living together, she hardly ever bothered. But when your mom died and you were having trouble, Dad went crazy. All he ever talked about was her. He cried all night. He would visit your mom's ashes and cry and my mom had enough of it. She filed for divorce and went back to America to settle. That year, I was about to finish University and I went with her. They divorced because he had another woman in his life but also because my mom couldn't stand seeing him so devastated and broken and she didn't know what to do to help him. It was against her pride to take you into the family, not when you had a dark past. We left him and it destroyed him. Not until he followed us to America. They were divorced but he stayed with us. We knew he would have killed himself if he mocked all day long. We started the grocery chains. I started the entertainment label just to keep him busy. But all this time, he was only really thinking about you."
"And that's why he came back here?"
"You and because he started Joombas Music Group here in partnership with Universal Music. It was one of the biggest leaps he started. Then his hope to find you grew once again. I guess we kept him alive just to find you."
"Thanks then."
"Look. Dad would eventually come up to you and ask you to take over whatever business he has in mind. I'm telling you so you could think about it."
"Is that why you told me to resign from Joombas?"
"Yes. First, because I think he'd be outraged to learn his daughter was only a dancer. Second, because if people knew you were his daughter, the management might either fire you or put you in a higher position and I would want to avoid office gossip. Because if it isn't about you being his daughter, the gossip of it happening because of Dean may arise and I don't want that. Especially not now."
"Why?!"
"Because... Because there are issues at Joombas and that thought may break everything apart."
"You're not telling me something."
"It's nothing for you to know. At least, not yet."
"And that's why I have trust issues."
"Come on, Chahye. Give me a break. These things are confidential."
"And my life is no gossip. Look. I can keep this as a secret. Me and you being related. All I ask is for you to keep my secret, too. And possibly, tell Dean to shut his mouth, too."
"Dean won't tell."
"Thank you."

Chahye put her fork and knife down and wiped her lips with the napkin on her lap. She took a glass of water and put it back down after a gulp or two, staring back at her brother. "Jeffrey," she started to get his attention. He stopped eating and looked back at her waiting.

"I hope your father doesn't think I don't like him. I mean... I really don't but I can't say I hate him, too."
"It will take time for you to decide what he is to you. I understand. I'm sure he knows that as well."
"I know. It's just... I really wanted to meet him because I had questions. I wanted to know things. And it feels like I even barely made a scratch on the surface. And right now, I don't even know what I want to happen anymore."
"I understand, Chahye."
"If the time would come that I agree in living with you and him, I hope you also understand that I can't be the daughter he dreams of overnight. I have to learn how to be a rich kid, business, all those stuff. And I'm not good with that."
"You'll learn it. You're a smart woman, Chahye."
"Jeffrey. I'm sorry as well, for how I'm talking to you. I'm normally like this. Frank. Straight. Sometimes I appear cold-hearted, too. But I have a heart and I know I could have pissed you off earlier. I'm sorry."
"I understand, Chahye. I know. Dean told me about that before. That's why he was initially attracted to you. You were different."
"About Dean..."
"I'm listening..."
"He... He said he already knows my story. Maybe Mr. Lee said it. Or maybe your father. I... I was so mad because I couldn't imagine if it was Mr. Lee who said it. I guess I really can't trust anyone."
"It was Dad who told him."
"Really? He knows that much?"
"What exactly does Dean know?"
"I... I don't know. Maybe about my mom dying and me going to a shrink. He mentioned that. The case. I didn't ask."
"Shouldn't you be happy he knows those things already?"
"I... I don't know. I feel like... I feel like I can't be happy about it. Who would be happy after knowing my life? Sometimes, I even dream that I didn't know anything about myself either. It kills me."
"Chahye... I don't know if what I'm saying is correct. But you should feel happy that Dean is interested in knowing you, you and your life. Other people wouldn't."
"And I wish he was just like other people."
"Chahye."
"There are just a lot of things about me that people don't know and understand. Maybe it's not really my life but the fact that they don't understand what's going to happen if they get involved with me too much."
"Then why did you say yes to Dean if you're scared of that?"
"Because... For once... With Dean... For once, I was never scared anymore."
"So what's keeping you from admitting everything to him?"
"Along with the fact that I fear nothing when I'm with Dean... Along with that came the fact that I'm starting to get scared for him. And I can't risk it. I can't risk his safety for my sake."
"Are you talking about Kang Chulhyun?"
"I think it's better to finish the food before talking about that. I don't want to lose my appetite."

Chahye smiled faintly then went back to her steak, picking her fork up and slicing through the meat. Jeffrey watched her intently. He didn't know everything about her predicament yet but he knew what she was talking about. Even he would be scared. And he admired how she doesn't seem to be aware of the dangers she knew were lurking around. They all had to be careful.

= _ = _ = _ = _ = _ =

Hi guys!

I hope you all understand that Chahye is a complicated character. Her rationale, attitude and approach towards people will always be different at specific times. As much as I want to deliver it to you the way it should be, or in a sense, easier for everyone to understand, even I find it hard to do it. Sometimes. When I write scenes with her, I don't even think I understand her as well. It just goes to show that people like this are very inconsistent and will never show their true colors to anyone. I even think that Chahye doesn't really know who she is yet. It's that complicated.

And since I want thing ms to be more realistic, I'm doing more research about psychology. It is a study I am really, really interested in but I'm no expert so I still have to study it, even on my own. I'm also watching out because there will be scenes that you might think are highly connected to how Dean and the other characters are living their lives as well. What we see through the media are just scratches of their true lives. With this story, I'm trying to put Chahye in the background, the stuff that happens behind the camera, in the offices, in their homes. It's exciting to do and yet so delicate to describe and show.

And I guess that's one more reason why I'm taking too long with this fanfic. I was talking to a friend before that this might take up to 60-70 chapters but I'm already over that and the best moments are yet to come. I wanted to finish this already. The plot in my head was already done. But as I write and recreate the scenes from my head to my fingers, more things come up that just makes a lot of sense if I add everything up in the story. Even I am getting so excited with what else may happen. Will Chahye still end up with Dean in the end? Who else are we going to meet in the story? Will there be new names? Is it really even possible for a person to forget a portion of their lives? What will happen now that Chahye knows who her real father is? 

I hope you guys bear with me and stick with me until the end! Much love! 💖💖💖