Chapter 13

December 17th, 2014

“Shut the hell up!” Jessica yells. “I don’t want to hear your stupid explanations.”

She cries out and double over, clutching her stomach as waves of nausea roll in her. Nausea from memories, that is. She hates remembering what had happened and what they did to her. Her life, stripped away with a single word, “leave”.

Tiffany gasps, her agape mouth turning dour. She reaches out to steady the sobbing girl who shakes her hand off. “Let me help, please.”

“Stop it.”

“Please, Jessica.” she pleads, wanting to end her former member’s suffering and make things up. But she fears it might already be too late, that her friend can no longer see her the same way she had seen her in the past.

“Stop with your fake apologies,” Jessica crouches down and hugs her knees, letting her hair cover her teary face. Her bare feet tingles as coldness sweeps past her, she can’t let a mere girl take her life down again. She takes a deep, ragged breath and pushes away the faith of returning friendships. It can never happen, no, not after what the girls who she had thought were her forever-sisters, had done. “I don’t need you.”

Keep your love unchanging for my wounded heart.

Looking in your eyes, no words are needed, time has stopped.

“But I do.” Tiffany stands there, unforgettable love and affection on her face. “I love you, just like this.

The longed end of wandering.

I leave behind this world's unending sadness.

Walking the many and unknowable paths, I follow a dim light.

It's something we'll do together to the end, into our new world.”

A warm glow in her chest grows steadily and Jessica looks up, their eyes levelling. She remembers where those words come from, the Days. She remember every single detail of it; her counting the number of days until their debut, her practicing their debut song for eight hours a day, her smiling and meeting the eyes of eight other girls who will become one and enter a new world holding hands, together.“I-Into the new world?”

“We promised, didn’t we?”

“Yeah.” the faintest trace of a smile tugs her lips. “We did.”

Tiffany smiles in sympathy and crouches down too, she keeps her chin up and looks straight into the eyes of the lost wanderer. She tries to search for a dream in them, or at least, the same dream that the girls of Girls’ Generation had about ten years ago. To be a prospering singer and to remain forever, as nine. “Jessica.”

“Mmm?”

“We can only shine the brightest as nine; we love you. Please understand that.” she lowers her voice, saying the words that had fuelled their trust and bonds with each other throughout the years of performing side by side.

“Then, why?” Jessica asks, betrayal and disbelief in written clearly all over the two words. Her smile has melted away, her jaw now set in a grim line. Indeed, why?

“‘Better sacrifice one than all.’” Tiffany quotes Taeyeon’s words calmly, although worry sparks in her dark pupils. She is worried that Jessica, who’s been doing pretty well with her, will snap and turn into the tormented soul once more. No, she does