008. Rule#7: Just blame it on the creative parents.

"CHO KYUHYUN!" 

"WAH IM SO SO SORRY!" Kyuhyun jumped, cowering behind a chair.

"The evil maknae, scared?  WOAH!" Heechul laughed, taking out his phone. 

"THIS IS GOING ON TWIITTERR!" Yesung cackled.

"HYUNGS!" Kyuhyun peeked from his chair, about to stop them, but at my glare he cowered back. "I'm sorry, Jae Mi!"

"Wait, wae?" Ryeowook asked, calmly eating a cupcake. 

"Because I found out her secret~" Kyuhyun wiggled his eyebrows.

"YAH YOU PROMISED!" I tackled him, pushing away the chair.

"Secret?" Yesung and Heechul stopped jeering and peered suspiciously at us.

"Uh, yeah! Secret! The secret that I...uh, you know... uh loves peppermint candy!" 

Well, that was a huge lie, I hate peppers and mint, and don't even mention peppermint.  i can't stand it's weird mix of tastes, it screws up the taste buds on my tongue.

"No you don'---" Kyuhyun was about to say, confused, but i slapped a hand over his mouth, and with two fingers  I slightly pinched his neck.

"Shhh," I hissed, and he widened his eyes and nodded.

"Aish , you lovedoves, having secrets already." Leeteuk chuckled and I blushed, jumping off Kyuhyun but giving him a last warning with another small pinch.

"Be glad that Eunhyuk and Donghae are practicing for Oppa Oppa, otherwise there would be some deaths tonight."

Ryeowook's phone began rining. 

"Yeoboseyo? Neh, hyung," Ryeowook said, motioning for us to be quiet.

After a while, he fumbled with his phone and then said into the mouthpiece, "Neh, the speaker is on."

"That's good. Because I just wanted to say," Eunhyuk's voice blasted into the living room.

"I AM WATCHING YOU, CHO KYUHYUN!"

The call ended with a click and Kyuhyun slid back under his chair.

~~~~~~~~

-Fast Forward To Christmas Eve-

(A/N :http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9gg7nR9V3q4 BoA's Distance)

The past two weeks have been constant bore. Eunhyuk and Donghae has been out of the dorm for promotions with Oppa Oppa and all the members are on a streak of radio guestings and variety show appearances.

I just hope that they’ll be home for Christmas Eve.

Wait, when is Christmas Eve?

I’ve been so brain dead as well as bored. No members mean no fun, no excitement, and nobody to even do chores for. To say the truth, I haven’t seen half the members at least once after my birthday and the shopping spree we went on.

I sighed and scanned the huge calendar hanging on the wall.

December 24^th, the 24^th… HOLY JUMPING GREEN SANTA’S ELVES TODAY IS FREAKING CHRISTMAS EVE!

I remember I used to be really hyper on Christmas Eve. I still am, really. I get the same rush of excitement and nobody can stop me once it’s nighttime. I never stay up past midnight in case I won’t get presents. It’s stupid for me, a 19 year old, to believe all this, and as much as I know that Santa and all those tales for children isn’t real, I can’t help myself but to fall into fantasy.

I jumped out into the living room to see which members are in attendance.

“Eunhyuk oppa?”

No reply.

“Hae oppa?”

No reply.

Okay, those two are probably off doing…things together again.

Hopefully they’ll be back tonight so I can enjoy my first holiday with my brother. Too lazy to check the members’ rooms one by one, I stood in the middle of the messy living room and cupped my hands around my mouth.

“YAH IS ANYBODY HOME?!”

My scream echoed off the walls and I cringed when it bounced back into my ears. That was loud.

I waited a while but no door opened. I crumpled to the floor and sighed into my hands. First holiday with these boys, guys, uh men, and they’ve already ditched me at home.

I dragged myself to the kitchen and got out a piece of whole grain bread.

Wait, what? WHOLE GRAIN?

I’m one of those people that can eat junk food and not have my stomach blow up, so whole grain is not exactly my idea of delicious. I closed the fridge and noticed a note pinned under a pink Hello Kitty magnet.

Holding peanut butter in one hand and biting the bread in my mouth, I managed to take down the note and transfer it to the kitchen table.

As I sat and spread peanut butter over my bread I managed to read two words.

Jae Mi anneyong!

Then the rest were complicated characters that I could read but not understand. Ching chang ling long ting tong … I blew up my cheeks in frustration and gave up on the note.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As I almost finished washing the dishes from the guys’ breakfast, the doorbell rang.

OKAY, WHICH IDIOT CHANGED THE DOORBELL SOUND?

Instead of its normal ding dong sound, it was a maniac shouting TURTLES! TURTLES! Over and over in an ear-piercing manner.

On second thought, why did I even ask that question? Of course it’s Yesung. I managed to look beyond its utter annoyingness and laughed. Yesung has a very husky voice, and even when he’s shouting it sounds as if he’s serenading.

“Mm!” I shouted as I quickly wiped my hands dry on my jeans and went to get the door.

I clicked the lock open and opened the door, not bothering to look at who it was. Probably one of the guys, coming back to get something they forgot. Realizing that whoever just knocked didn’t bother to invite themselves in, I rose my eyes and looked at the stranger’s face.

Correction, the stranger’s absolutely cute face.

Oh. Hot. Damn.

“U-uh, hi,” I mumbled, feeling myself burning.

But my stranger danger alert came on and I felt my conscience scold my brain.

Yah, you don’t even know who he is! He could be a kidnapper and you wouldn’t even realize because you’re too busy staring at his beautiful teeth and perfect-shade lips and wide killer smile!

“Hey! You’re Hyukkie’s sister, right? You’re like a cute little dumping~” he laughed, a beautiful string of notes coming through his mouth.

I snapped into reality fast enough to register that it’s exactly what Donghae first said to me.

“Yeah, and you are…?” I asked, awareness coming to me.

“I’m Kim Kibum,” he replied, ruffling my hair.

Kim Kibum?

My brain reached into the depth of my knowledge and I imagined a pair of hands pulling out a folder and rumbling through it.

Kim Kibum, Kim Kibum, the imaginary hands kept fumbling at my memories, trying to recall where I’ve heard this name before.

“Wait, have I seen you before?” I asked suspiciously, still trying to remember. I’m sure I’ve heard his name somewhere!

-Flashback-

“Jamie, why are you asking me Super Junior questions all of a sudden? Are you a fan?” I could almost see her proud smirk.

“Psh! No! I’m just wondering. Last question, who’s Kangin, Hangeng, and Kibum?”

The million dollar question.

“Kangin is a member of Super Junior that is currently serving his duty in the military , Hangeng is the Chinese member of Super Junior that had a lawsuit against SM and now he’s doing solo in China. And Kibum is absent from group promotions because he is focusing on dramas.”

-End of Flashback-

“OH! You’re THAT Kibum!” I shouted ecstatically once I recovered the information about him.

“Yeah, uh, that Kibum.” He tilted his head, confused, yet nodded.

“Well, come in, oh my gosh, I’m sorry I made you stand outside!” I hustled him into the kitchen while I cleaned up the rest of the dishes.

“So, how’s living with 13 men?” he asked in English, and I jumped in surprise at his sudden change of languages.

“It’s actually really normal, comparing how it was the first two days I was here.” Thinking that he’s like a replica of Henry, I replied in my fluent mother tongue. Then I realized that he had no clue what I just replied and I laughed.

“I was just trying to be cool,” he blushed furiously, switching back to Korean.

“Oh, so you’re not like Henry,” I excused him with a smile.

“I wish~ my English is really pro compared to the guys’, but it when I’m with Henry.” He laughed and rubbed his neck with his hand.

Just then my wandering eyes landed on the note still sitting on the table. I just stared at it for a while and then my brain caught on.

Ask him to translate, genius. My brain shouted, and if it had eyes they’d be rolling right now.

Alright, alright.

“Uhm, Kibum-sshi, can you help me translate this note? I’m still practicing to read Korean.” I laughed nervously and gestured at the note. He reached over the table and picked it up. It took him a total of three milliseconds before he looked up at me and nodded.

First he read it over in Korean to me, aloud. But he read it in a speed that should be measured in light years, so I sighed and waited patiently until he finished.

When he reached the end of the note, he looked up with puppy eyes, looking at me expectantly.

“I couldn’t understand,” I said and looked down at my hands nervously.

“I read it too fast, didn’t I?” he smacked himself on the side of his head and nervously laughed again.

He read the note in sentences, and translated in English after every line.

“Hi Jae Mi.” he said, and I nodded, waving to prove that I comprehended.

“I am at the KBS station filming right now.” He read the next line, and I nodded again.

“Today is what you call Christmas Eve right?”

“Yeah.” I replied, as if Kibum was Eunhyuk himself.

“I will be back in the afternoon with the rest of the members. Wait patiently.”

I smiled upon hearing that they will be back for the night after all.

“But for now, there will be a guest coming. You will know it’s him when you see his marvelous smile and gorgeousness.”

My eyes narrowed.

“He didn’t actually write that,” I laughed and Kibum laughed along.

“Yeah, he didn’t. But it’s true.” He winked, and I smiled politely.

“Well, he actually wrote, you’ll recognize him because he smiles like an idiot and will try and speak English to be cool.”

“Smart brother of mine,” I stated, and Kibum’s lips curled into a smile.

“Then he said, Spend your day with him until we come home. Bye~”

“Thank you so much for translating, Kibum-sshi,” I grinned at Kibum waved his hand.

“No problem.”

We sat staring at each other for a moment, until I broke the gaze and looked down. “So, what do you wanna do?”

Kibum shrugged his shoulders. “Did you eat breakfast yet?” he asked, looking at me, concerned.

“Well, sort of. I had two pieces of bread.” Just then, my stomach grumbled its complaint.

Way to go, stomach, my brain cackled.

Yah, you’re the one that’s in command of all nerves, the stomach replied back.

Do they even have nerves in the intestines?

Oblivious to my mental battle with myself, Kibum stood up and brushed nonexistent dust off himself.

“I know a great coffee shop; we can go there for brunch if you want.”

“Alright, lemme go change my shirt,” I bounced into Eunhyuk’s bedroom.

What should I wear to brunch at a coffee shop with a member of one of Korea’s most famous boy groups?

I would love to search that up on Google, but maybe there wouldn’t be results. I rolled my eyes helplessly at the clothes dripping off the hangers.

Finally my eyes landed on a black and white shirt that hung a little below my waist. I threw it over my head and also put on a black leather jacket because, it’s after all, winter.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(A/N http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qNVT07w5QsA Sleigh Ride - TVXQ)

“YAY! KIBUM OPPA IT’S A WHITE CHRISTMAS EVE~!” I ran joyfully out the apartment door and smiled widely at the beautiful scene. The trees, sidewalks, cars covered with a delicate layer of white snow.

He looked at me, surprised at my sudden use of informality.

“Sorry! I meant Kibum-sshi.” I blushed and avoided his eyes.

“No, I’m happy you like me enough to drop formalities,” when I finally dared to look at him he smiled and swung an arm over my shoulder in a friendly manner.

I felt my body tense, but he didn’t seem to notice anything and slowly I got used to it and relaxed.

“Jae Mi, I actually called some of my hoobaes while you were changing, is it okay if they tag along?” he asked as we trudged over the sidewalk to get to the other side of the traffic.

“Of course~ the more the merrier on Christmas Eve,” I smiled and he nodded happily.

It didn’t take long to walk to the coffee house and when we arrived, there were five boys waiting for us already at a table, with coffees and cupcakes in front of them.

“Hyung! That was the fast~!” a guy said, standing up to greet him with a bow. I watched quietly as each of them bowed a slight 70 degrees and then gave Kibum a high five. As the fifth one sat down, the first person that stood up to greet Kibum acknowledged me. “Wow hyung, found yourself a girlfriend?”

I peered at him, looking at his flawless face. He had a sharp jawbone, structured like a dinosaur. He had pretty eyes though, that looked at me in a friendly way as I looked at him.

“Nawh, this is Hyukkie’s sister.” Kibum patted my head and I blushed. They all stared at me in shock for a while, then Mr. Dinosaur stood up.

“Hello, Eunhyuk hyung’s sister!” he said brightly as if our awkwardness before never happened.

“Hello, Dinosaur.” I bowed to show respect but couldn’t help but let the sudden nickname slip.  He looked at me in shock while Kibum and the other four boys burst into continuous laughter.

“See, Jjong, I told you that you look like a dinosaur~!” one of them exclaimed, gasping for breath.

“No I don’t!” Dinosaur pouted, covering his face with his hands.

“I was joking, you don’t,” I offered and he immediately smiled.

One of them stood up and the rest followed. “Anneyonghaseyo, we are shining shiny!” they said in unison, but not too loud so that the others would hear.

I figured that they’re probably a boy group as well. “But you guys don’t look…uh, shiny.” I said, confused.

“We’re not always shiny. We’re just, you know, named Shiny.” The one that stood up – I’m guessing he’s the leader- explained, smiling a big wide smile. D’awwh, his smile is so cute.

“Who names a band after a relative adjective?” I asked, amused. Really, their names are so cute but weird at the same time. I mean, Super Junior? Shiny?

“I think it’s supposed to mean People that shine~” he explained, shrugging.

Then one of the boys sitting down piped up, “but our name is like, characterized as S-H-I-N-e-e.”

“Anyways, I’m the leader, my name is Lee Jinki but everyone calls me Onew.” He introduced himself, and as a waitress walked by holding a plateful of chicken, he yelped.

“Miss? Can we have a plate- no, three plates of chicken please?” he asked nicely and the waitress nodded, looking at him as if in a trance, and she ran away screaming yet balancing the plate of chicken.

“Yah, way to blow your cover, Onew.” Kibum laughed and smacked Onew’s head. Dinosaur stood up and smiled.

“Hello, I’m SHINee’s bling bling Jonghyun.” I couldn’t resist laughing. Bling bling? Like those guys with huge chain necklaces and money signs?

“You’re like Eunhyuk!” he exclaimed, sliding back into his booth seat. “How?” I asked, curious. So far I’ve realized that my brother and I are really not alike.

“You guys both love teasing people, namely me. You guys are really funny, too. And oh, you look like a monkey.”

“WHAT?!” I exclaimed, surprised at the sudden change of course in this conversation. “I don’t look like a monkey!”

“It’s like a zoo! I look like a dinosaur, you look like a monkey! Maybe we should get some raccoons and fish.” Jonghyun laughed, almost evilly.

“But I’m not a monkey!” I protested.

 “But we all know Eunhyuk is one.” I added, smiling evilly along with Jonghyun.

“If you guys are starting a zoo, I can be your divalicious zookeeper!” third guy stood up and made a model pose.

“Yessir!” I saluted him, mockingly and he grinned.

“I’m Key, but my real name is Kim Kibum.”

Wait, what?

“Uh, I thought Kibum’s name is Kibum.” I said, confused. This whole Korean name things is like a tongue twister.

“Kibum’s name is Kibum and my name is Kibum therefore both our names are Kibum.” Key said, also confused.

“I got lost after you said the first Kibum,” Onew exclaimed whilst munching on some chicken drumstick that just appeared out of nowhere.

“So basically he’s named Kibum, and so am I. But fans call me Kibum and call that Kibum Key.” Kibum, the Super Junior one, explained.

“Okay, so I call you,” I pointed to Kibum from Super Junior, “Kibum.”

They both nodded, anticipating.

“And I call you,” I pointed towards Key, “Key.”

“Yay!” they jumped up, high fiving me.

“You should be glad that Kibum isn’t here! Then things would get so much more confusing!” Kibum said, chuckling.

“Isn’t Kibum already here?” I asked, confused, again. Just when I thought I got the names down…

“Yeah, there’s another Kibum. He used to be in U-Kiss.” Key explained.

“ANOTHER KIBUM!?!” I shouted, slumping helplessly at the table.

Wait, we’re at a coffee shop and we haven’t been having food at all! Except for the SHINee boys with their coffee and Onew with his -OH MY GOSH- fifth greasy plate of chicken. A waitress walked by and I stopped her, asking for coffee and some Danish pastries. She looked at the SHINee boys and Kibum enviously, and walked away nodding but giving me a deadly glare.

“Yep, and his last name is also Kim!” Jonghyun laughed.

“Woah, hold up. So first, there’s Kim Kibum of Super Junior.”

Kibum nodded and gave me a thumbs-up.

“Then, there’s Kim Kibum of SHINee.”

Key smiled widely, proud.

“And finally, there’s Kim Kibum, ex-member of U-Kiss?”

They all nodded.

“Such special names.” I commented sarcastically.

“Blame it on our creative parents,” Key laughed, shrugging.

The waitress returned to our booth with a tray of food. She gently placed the toast and smoothies that weren’t ordered in front of SHINee and Kibum, smiling widely. “Oppas, eat well~” she crooned, letting a bit of cleavage show. I realized then that she wasn’t Korean, at least not fully Korean. She had a deep American accent, her hair roots were strawberry blonde, and her eyes were naturally ice blue.

I just sat there patiently waiting for her to finish her show and give me my coffee. She finally acknowledged my presence and shot me another glare. She reached out an arm and crisply grabbed the coffee, and as she reached over the table to put it in front of me, she tipped it and hot coffee poured all over me.

“H-hey!” I stumbled from the booth and away from the dripping coffee.

“Oh my gosh! I’m so, so, so, sorry!”  She exclaimed in English, feigning surprise.

“I-it’s alright.” I mumbled, ignoring her fake politeness.

Kibum looked between us for a moment, and then he gently put 20,000 won on the table. “Let’s go, Mimi.”

SHINee nodded, ignoring the waitress, and Jonghyun grabbed my wrist.

As we walked past the waitress, standing there snickering at my stained shirt, I looked at her.