Your POV:

I was always happy. I was a very happy person. I had a boyfriend, a close friend group, and a plan for my life after I graduated high school. I planned to attend a college that had a good English program so I could teach English and travel back to my home town in LA, hell maybe even teach dance lessons or something. Once I got a stable job, Jungkook and I would get married, we would settle down and travel the world. You name it, we'll be there. Maybe have a few kids even, a dog or two, maybe a few other animals. I had it all planned out...

But things never go as planned like we want them to. Fate decides you're way too happy and then destroys whatever you have built up without any sort of warning.

"You're really doing this to me..." I struggled to say as my hands clenched my phone tighter. "You're really doing it..."

"I'm sorry Ki..." Jungkook's voice resonated through my phone. "I need time to figure out how I'm going to live my life first...I need to figure out what my priorities are since we'll be graduating soon....it's not that I don't love you...trust me, that's not it...I just need a break....do you understand what i'm saying?"

Of course I understood, but I couldn't breathe, more or less speak to answer. It was hitting me a lot harder than it should have. A break? We all know what a "break" really means in a relationship. There's two kinds/types of breaks:

1) The "break" where it only lasts for about a week or so and then you get back together

or

2) The "break" where after a period of time, you grow to realize you won't get back together

Even someone as dense as me knows that this won't end well on my part. I was in shock. Out of nowhere...on an ordinary day where the sun was out, the clouds gone away...the tables turned and even as the sun shined, my heart was clouded with questions that I couldn't bring myself to ask him. I thought we were okay. Sure, we hadn't spoken to each other for about 2 weeks, but that's because he was busy and so was I. We had planned to meet this  Saturday so we could go shopping for Mihyun's birthday present, but then  he decides to finally call me after weeks of silence and says this. How does he expect me to be okay with this? 

It doesn't work like that...it doesn't...but why can't I say anything to stop this from progressing any further?

"I'm just saying...right now, I have a lot on my plate...especially since the college I want to go to is in the U.S....and my family right now is going through a lot of complications..." he explained more, but all it was doing was tearing me up inside even though I should be understanding.

"So you want me to let you go" was what I wanted to say, but I remained quiet as the first wave of tears overflowed uncontrollably. With a stuttering breath, I finally decided to replied.

"I...understand.." I managed to say as the tears continued to flow down my cheeks. 

"Alright..." he replied with a sigh as if a burden was released. "Maybe after I figure things out, I'll consider getting back together. We can still go shopping this Saturday though. It'll just be like how we first met."

"Yeah..." I replied hurtfully as the second wave of tears  rimmed my eyes.  There was a moment of death piercing silence between us and before I could think, my fingers pressed the hang up button and I set my phone down next to me feeling drained of energy. I sat there on my bed feeling lifeless. I had so many mixed feelings. I didn't know whether he wanted me to wait for him or if he wanted me to move on. I didn't know if he would be coming back to me at all, especially since he said the word "consider". I wanted to believe in him. I waned to believe that he'd be back for sure, but there was large part of me that was telling me to let go and just officially break up because as of right now we're on a "break" and we are no longer boyfriend and girlfriend, but just close friends.

The plan I had dreamed of was crashing to pieces as the seconds ticked by without waiting for me to recover from what had just happened. Many questions and thoughts filled my head and it was the thoughts that were eating me alive from the inside out. My emotions were all over the place. I was angry, sad, confused, overwhelmed, depressed, stressed all at once, but at the same time, I was trying so hard to repress everything. I was trying to decieve myself that the past few minutes was just a dream and that I would wake up and it would all be a joke, but I also knew deep down that it was all true. Nothing could be said to save our relationship now. His words were final, but me...I couldn't even bring myself to say anything. I couldn't bring myself to argue with him.

"I need to tell..I need to tell someone or I'll go insane keeping it to myself like this..." I stuttered as I grabbed my phone again. My fingers quickly typed Yoo Mi Hyun, Park Soo Young, Kim Tae Hyung, and Park Jimin.

TO: Yoo.......Min

It's done...we're done...

FROM: Ki Yeon

After I pressed send, the first to reply was Sooyoung:

What do you mean?!

Then Jimin:

Are you okay Ki??

Then Taehyung: 

Do you want me to talk to him?

Then lastly Mi Hyun:

I'm sorry to hear.

I waited an extra 5 minutes to see if they would say anything else, but no one did. I was waiting for someone to tell me to chase after him and try to work things out...but no one did. No one said the words I wanted to hear and even though they didn't say what I wanted to hear, I knew I still had to reply. I sent a long text message explaining the situation and what had happened. It was about 4 pages long in all honesty and I wasn't feeling too good about it. As I typed up the message, it became harder and harder to breathe. It was like someone was pushing down on my chest and making me have to breathe in short breaths. After I pressed send, my phone started to ring unexpectedly with a call from Mihyun.

"Y-yobosaeyo?" I took a deep breath to stop myself from stuttering.

"How you feeling?" Mihyun's voice echoed in my ear with light concern.

"..."

"Kiyeon?"

"...."

"Answer me..."

"I'm.." I slowly started to say wiping my cheeks dry with my long sleeves. "I'm..not okay..."

"You know I talked to him just a few minutes ago."

"..."

"He said the reason he's doing this is for your sake..."

Liar.

"He said he doesn't want to be the boyfriend who says hi every other day...he wants to be there for you all the time and he can't if he's being pressured by all the stuff he's going through...he said it was between success and happiness...and he said if he wants to be happy, he needs  to figure out which is more important to him...you or his career...being able to make a living or living off by paychecks each month..."

Stop taking his side...

"..."

"C'mon Ki, say something..."

"What am I suppose to say? That it's okay? You out of everyone should know that this is NOT okay Mi..."

"He's going through a lot right now...give him time..."

"..."

"He just needs some time to think okay? Don't assume anything so quickly."

Don't say things like that other wise I'm going to start assuming anyway...even though i already am...

"It's okay to cry right now....just make sure to get back up soon okay? I'm here if you still want to talk to someone..."

Then the call ended and I was left there feeling bitter and alone again. How could I just say it was okay when it was tearing me up inside? Sure, it was just a break, but what if he never comes back? What if his feelings change? Would 9 months and 2 days not mean a thing to him? Am I taking this too far? Am i thinking too much? There are too many unanswered questions and it's making me doubt his return to me even more. What's even worse was that he said the words "consider". It wasn't even a clear, "I'll come back to you and we can start again," but it was "consider". This personality wasn't like me. 

I hate my emotional side with a passion. It makes me depend on people and makes me feel annoying. It made me seem like I was blinded by love...but I'm not. Could I even consider it love in the first place? I'm hurt that he didn't bother telling me he had all this stress pented up inside him. I could have helped him through it...but he never even gave me a chance to help.

Then my phone buzzed again and I saw a text message from Sooyoung.

He's stupid...if he knew this was going to happen from the beginning why make you have all these feelings? If it was that simple, he should've ended it sooner to save you...it wouldn't be so painful for you....And honestly, if he had to actually pick between you and his success in life, he isn't worth your time Ki...I know you don't want me to talk bad about him, but he's hurting you and I'm angry at him for that because I trusted he would treat you well. I don't want to see you cry over someone like him...your tears aren't worth that...You have every right to be angry at him, but I still need you to think clearly. Don't do anything rash and stupid that you'll regret later...I'm here if you need to talk. Call me or something and I'll answer. Just don't keep it pent up okay?

-Joy

I slowly inhaled and exhaled trying to stop myself from whimpering and to stop the pressure in my chest from expanding. I needed to snap out of it. I knew that, but I just needed to cry for today. I didn't want to be around anyone or hear anyones excuses to try to get me to move on. I just wanted answers from him. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N:

First chapter!!! 

Woohoo!

Sorry for this being such an emotional chaper xD, but it's going to be like that for the first couple chapters because what type of break-up isn't emotional?

Subscribe and Comment pls <3

Thanks!

-KaSo-sso