Jinki & Kibum’s POV. 

We are all born weak and helpless.
All lead the same short troubled life. 
We grow and wither as qucikly as flowers. 
We dissapear like shadows; 

Job 14:1-2

It has been two weeks since we decided to be like this. Kibum is quietly reading a magazine, waiting for me to finish my shift and eat dinner together. Its selfish, His decision only benefits me but I have no choice. After out visit to the church, we decided to be together but as he emphasized. “NO LABEL.” We are just two people who enjoy each other’s company and no one but us knows what we really are. For two weeks, ive been living the life of a free man. Of a man who is not bound with duty to the Catholic church. My Pastor keeps on calling me, I guess. He is doubting. 

Even before this one year freedom and test of loyalty, I have heard stories about tempation. It is always the same, God places the only thing you’ve ever wanted infront of you. I dont really know if its a test or is God really telling you to back out. I do not know what Kibum is in my life right now, all I know is that everything seems to be in technicolor. For someone like me who always thinks in grey & whites; Kibum came as that shade that I never knew. 

“ stop staring and continue working~” 

He mouthed as he caught my stare. The next customer came in and I remember the day I went to visit Jungsoo’s grave. I asked for a sign, anything that will prove that he is letting me go. But still. I cant let go of Kibum, at the same time, I cant leave my duty to the Lord. The past few weeks with Key is better than all my good memories combined. I look at him from across the room and he catches my eye. He waves and told me to wait for him. I nodded. I only have a month and weeks before my annointment,
But Jungsoo isnt giving me the sign I asked for. 
" you better tell him you're a priest." i almost jumped off my seat. I turned and see Minho's eyes practically setting fire on my skin. 
" if you dont tell him, I will." he continued and turned against me, serving the next customer.

My mind raced. How the hell did Minho know about me? The owner of this shop is a friend of my superior. Its always a secret, and identity of a person to be annointed as a priest is always a secret. I feel someone drag me and Minho is leading me towards the employee’s room.

“ How?” I managed to croak out. 

“ I accidentally looked into your file, “ he explained and I dont know what to do.

“ Minho, Look-“

He stared intently at me, “ what are you doing Onew? 1 month before your annointment?” He emphasized it, like he couldnt believe that i could actually do this. “Kibum may not be nicest person in seoul, but no one deserves this.” 

I looked at my feet and bowed. The insensitive, playboy and practically once frigid minho is now lecturing me on love. I smiled, maybe this is because of Taemin. Minho has changed into this person because of Taemin. Changed into a much better person. 

“ I will tell him.” I replied but he doesnt believe me. 

“ You better tell him soon. “ 

Ou talk was disrupted by a phone call and i picked up. 

“ Onew, can you assist in the mass tomorrow?”

Its my superior. I almost forgot, I need to assist in a mass before annointment. I regained my sense and responded with

“ Sure father, I will assist you tomorrow.” 

Minho is already fixing his things as I closed my phone. 

He walked out the door and I stared at my watch, Its time to go. 

“ Onew! Yah ~ ive been waiting for you!” Key planted a kiss on my cheek and snatched my bag away from me as we walked towards the nearest mall. This has been our routine, he waits for me then we hang out and we go home. We decided that we will spend time together, till, in his words ‘till you cant affod to leave me alone.’

I know, in my heart that i should tell him. But with him, holding my hands and his voice drowning out all the noise. I dont want this to end. 

Kibum already knows about my family and about Jungsoo, as far as I know. He is the only person in this world who knows the real me and still has the guts to tell me straight in the face ‘im staying beside you.’ Sometimes im left to wonder if He is a guardian sent to me. Maybe he is. 

“ Why are you so quiet today?”

He complained as I walked him home. I reasoned that im tired from work and he accepted my lies. As he opened the gates towards his home, i shouted.

“ wait!”

He is waiting for me to say something, But I cant. Not today. My selfish heart got the better of me. I waved goodbye and walked away. I knew I should’ve said the truth. It was a simple task, I owe it to him. I didnt know It was too late.


=== KEY ===

“ We need to talk.” 

I eyed Minho as he excused me from my talk with Taemin. What does this guy need anyway? Tips on Taemin’s favorites? I giggled. 

“ i have something to tell you Key,”

“ shoot- “ i answered confidently. He fidgeted. 

“ You have to attend the 6pm mass in St. John’s chapel.”

I titled my head- “ come again.”

“ attend the 6pm mass in St. John’s chapel.”

It was more of a command and I looked at him, “why?”

He remained still, “ Onew asked me to tell you, “ 

“Oh.” 

I replied. Well then. I smiled at him and returned to taemin. Its a bit weird, Onew did not come to work today. He said something about family matters. Texting or calling him will be the next step but Taemin is too excited to talk to me. Apparently, he is planning a date with Minho. 

“ I already asked the maids to prepare our garden, asking them to place those white lights and water. And..” 

“ TAEMIN, TAEMIN, breathe!”

I cut him off. He has been planning this ‘perfect date’ eversince they got together. I still remember when he called me, crying and laughing at the same time after the concert. He kept squealing and screaming and i could almost hear him jumping up and down. Taemin relaxed and turned to me. 

“ This has to be PERFECT. Key, its our first real date as a couple .” 

“ You do know that Minho wants you more than the food, wine or the set-up. Right?”

Taemin smiled sweetly. 

“ ofcourse, its just that-“

“Taemin!”

I hear minho call him out and he immediately went to his side. Minho was holding an envelope. He is saying something as Taemin listened intently. Minho took out a piece of card from the envelope and Taemin literally screamed and jumped at Minho. They are hugging now and Taemin is crying I call his attention and he mouthed. 

“ He is going to Paris with me!” 

I smiled widely. Everything is going perfectly for the both of them. But what about me? Onew and My relationship with him is a big question. We act like couples, but hey, its me suggestion. Isnt it? We dont have to label anything between us. Im contented with everything that we have now, but I have sinking feeling that everything will go wrong. I know about his family, and he opened up about his past love, Jungsoo. But still. He is hiding something from me. 

Plus, I overheard him talking to the manager that he will be resigning in the coffee shop in a month’s time. I left the two loverbirds for their celebration and went to the Church.

I wonder why Onew asked me to come here. Well. After all, this is a memorable place for us. I entered, and the mass is already starting. Im late. As usual, I sat at the back row and listened to the priest talk. I glanced at the people.No Onew. 

Then, came the surprise of my Life. 

I know this; once in awhile, a younger priest takes over the other parts of the mass as a sort of trainee. After the homily, I couldn’t believe my eyes. There he is, Onew. My Onew. Continuing the mass.

“ what the hell- “ i cursed under my breath. I walked forward, making sure he doesnt see me. Its really Onew, Lee Jinki. 

Trying to make sense of it all as the mass i continued. All i can come up with is one explanation. He would be a priest. The reason why he was so damn religious. Why he is so gentle and does volunteer work. Why he disappeared from his family and the reason for the whole ‘ i cant give myself to you’ dilemna. 

I couldnt even hear any noise anymore. 

My heart beat drowned everything out. I glanced once more. Lord, is this some kind of sick joke? I tell myself. But i blinked and blinked and closed my eyes. Opening them to find out that this is the reality. We can never be together. 



The mass ended and im left all alone on the last row. I called onew. Telling him that we should see each other at the bus stop. He replied with a YES. I hear the door creak and there he is. In his usual clothes, He is mine again. I tap the chair loudly to catch his attention and he sees me. His eyes are startled and i motion for him to sit down next to me. He chooses otherwise. He sits 2 rows in front of me. 

Silence. 

“ so, this is the big secret of Lee Jinki.” I tried to sound pissed, sad and insulting all the same time but it all came out as a big prelude to crying my eyes out. 

“ Key, i meant to tell you.”

“well, you really told me now.”

He refuses to turn his back and face me. He is a different person now, we are jsut two rows away but i can feel a larger distance. 

“ OH COME ON GOD! “ i shouted louder than I intended. A mix of all the frustrations of my life and realizing AGAIN, that the only thing that i want can never be mine. Why must God take everything away. 

Onew stood up but he didnt even comfort me. Just stood there, at my side. Not even bothering to walk towards me. 
“ did you even Love me?” I asked, turning to him. I tried my hardest to recapture this moment cause this will be the last time I see him. My final memory of his is a stern look on his face, with his brown hair unwashed and his favorite blue shirt hugging his body. 

“ Yes. Thats why im letting you go. “

That’s the last time I saw Onew. 

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♥ This chapter is just. yeah. THE TRUTH. the next chapter will be the conclusion. so. yeah. watch out.