Illustration by Flowerbeer

1 Filling the Spaces in Between

Searching for the right time is never easy.

Every time you try to make things go on your way, something messes it up.

The frustrating part is that it happens every single time you try something different,

It’s very exhausting to fix it as if you have the luxury of time of doing so when in fact you’re actually wasting one.

Sometimes you wish that in those moments you actually made something worthwhile.

Even just for once.

***

Walking down the street is what I do every afternoon while thinking how I will finish the book I am writing. A serious writer’s block hit me really bad since I’ve been doing this for almost six months. My publisher is giving me three months deadline to finish it or else I’ll be looking for another one to publish this book. I don’t know if I can do it in a month so here I am, looking for something  to push my luck and find what I’ve been missing to finish this book.

“Hey there miss you want some pie?” An old granny offered me an odd looking pie.

“Uh no I’m fine granny I’m still-“

“Oh come on you look so skinny, you need some of this I guarantee you best results.”

She said.

I feel like she’s telling the truth but she’s a stranger. I don’t know what’s inside of that pie, yet something urges me to take it.

“Come on, take it.” She said while grinning at me.

“Why are you so anxious to give it to me?” I asked.

“Because I know you need it, Jessica .”

I paused for a moment when she said my name.

“How did you-“

Before I could ask her again she suddenly walked away as if nothing had happened and now I’m holding a box of what it seems to be an apple pie.

“What in the world?” I mumbled.

As I was about to turn around and leave the pie, I bumped into someone and now I’m on the floor with smashed pie scattered everywhere on my clothes.

“OH MY GOD, I’m so sorry I didn’t see you there.” Said the person who bumped into me.

I looked up to see who it was.

Three seconds was all it took.

“I-“

I was just staring like an idiot at this gorgeous looking lady that who I really should be mad at because of what she had done to me.

“Are you alright?”

Her voice doesn’t even help me at all collect my thoughts and utter a single word again.

I was stunned by her beauty and I didn’t know how long I sat there gaping like an idiot.

She suddenly held my hands and I felt a jolt of electricity from within.

She kept saying sorry over and over but all I did was smile and stare at her the whole time. It was only when she finally stopped apologizing that it hit me: she was weirded out by me.

 “Oh I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to stare… at you… well not like that.” I stammered to complete even just one sentence.

“No, no! It’s absolutely fine I should be the one apologizing because of... this.” She pointed out the certain mess she made.

“Nah it’s alright I was blocking the road anyway.” I said.

“Well, I think it’s best if you come with me and clean yourself. I just live nearby.” She offered.

“That is really sweet of you but its fine, I can manage.” I said feeling butterflies in my stomach as I continue to converse to her.

“No, I really insist I’m sorry I messed up your jacket.” She said while pulling me so we can start walking to her place.

“Wow you’re so eager to bring me to your place do you? We don’t even know each other.”

She smiled at me and said, “My name’s Tiffany, Tiffany Hwang and you?”

“I’m Jessica. Jessica Jung.”

***

“Here’s some clothes I think we’re the same size so it should fit perfectly. There’s the bathroom if you want to take a shower.”

“Oh, thank you.” I took the clothes and went inside to fix myself.

As I was about to finish I saw something looking so familiar to me.

A bracelet hanging on the mirror.

It was the same bracelet as mine.

The bracelet that has the same engraved words,

“Always and Forever.”

I thought to myself that it could be just a coincidence so I put it back and tried to shrug off all the possibilities running through my head.

Knocks on the door interrupted my thoughts.

“Hey, uhm do you still need anything?”

“Oh no I’m fine, I’m actually done. I’ll be there in a minute!” I scrambled to get my other stuff before going out of the bathroom.

***

It was quite a bit awkward when she asked me to stay for a while to accompany her. She asked a lot of questions about my personal life which was a tad uncomfortable but the tension eventually began fading away when she started telling some stories about her getting five different hair colors in a month just to get her dream acting role for a movie.

“It’s still funny when I reminisce those times trying to get into a role I wanted so bad. I was so desperate that I did all the silly things on my hair the casting director asked me to do. I remember I colored my hair bright red once then immediately changed it to blonde and brunette and I can’t even remember what color was next after that.” She kept laughing about it while telling the story.

“Don’t they have wigs for that? And did it ruin your hair after those color changes in a span of one month?” I asked while looking at her intently observing the way she moves every time she laughs at her own stories.

“No, actually I used temporary hair dyes but yeah I had to bleach my hair though before I can attain the color that they desire.”

“So did you get the job after that?”

“Unfortunately.. No, they said I wasn’t the one they were looking for.”

“Wow that’s harsh. After all that you’ve done with your hair?”

“Yeah but I found a better career after that hair fiasco thing.”

I knew it was stalker-ish but when I looked at her, I just couldn’t help but stare and be amazed.

As she rambled on and on, a little something inside of me sparked as if jitters on the pit of my stomach were trying to send signals to my brain trying desperately to remind me of something. Like a familiar feeling or déjà vu. As though this moment had happened before and it brings back so much memories.

“I’m sorry but this may sound crazy but… I get the feeling that… Do I know you?.” I said trying not to be awkward or anything.

“Huh. I thought I was the only one!” She said sounding delighted.

Then we heard someone’s at the door.

“Expecting someone?” I asked.

“Well, not in this hour. Wait here. I’ll get it.” She said as she stood up to answer the door.

A few moments of silence later, I heard loud thud so I scurried over to the door and I felt my heart sink when I saw the moment unraveling in front of my eyes. It was a woman kissing Tiffany, kissing so passionately that they seem to be the only ones existing in their own world.

I didn’t want to get things awkward so I silently slipped away from them. Unfortunately it was the exact moment when the woman finally let go of Tiffany  and they finally noticed my presence.

“Oh I’m so sorry Jessica. I’m really, really embarrassed you had to see that… Uhm well.. honey this is Jessica, Jessica this.. My adorable fiancé, Yuri.” She said sensing some awkwardness in the situation.

“Hi Yuri.” I took the initiative to shake her hand and be polite.

“Hey Jessica, uhm so how did you ended up here at my fiancé’s apartment?” She asked.

Thankfully, Tiffany spoke on my behalf before I could answer.

“Oh we’ve just met at the street. We’ve bumped into each other and her jacket was soiled with the pie she was holding then I invited her here to clean up because it was really my fault because I wasn’t looking at my way.” She said briefly.

“Ah I see.” She replied.

I sensed the weird vibe she’s giving me so I took the liberty to excuse myself.

“It’s getting late. I should be going, thank you so much for having me here Tiffany.” I smiled to both of them before leaving the apartment.

As soon as I reach the front of the apartment building, I heard someone yell my name.

“Wait, Jessi!”

I was surprised when I heard her called me like that.

Because only one person calls me by that name.

I smiled before I turned around to see Tiffany’s slightly exhausted face probably from running down four flights of stairs.

“Hey Tiffany.” I tried to keep it casual.

“Here’s my number if you want to hang out sometime. Just give me a call.” She handed me a piece of paper and smiled at me before running back again inside her apartment.