For a brief hopeful moment, Sunny had expected to find Jessica waiting for them at the breakfast buffet table with a plate of toast in one hand and a warm smile on her face, greeting the rest of the group members with a bright “good morning” as she normally did.

Instead what Sunny got when she and the rest of Girls’ Generation came down to the dining lounge of their hotel for breakfast were businessmen and families either wandering around half-asleep or whispering amongst themselves as they recognized South Korea’s most famous girl group. They weren’t exactly the subtlest of groups with 8 members, 1 manager, 2 bodyguards and a few stylists occupying the dining area.

A small area at the far corner of the hotel’s restaurant had been sectioned off for the Girls’ Generation entourage to dine in, and Sunny watched as Taeyeon and Tiffany sat down at a different table from the rest of her members, who acted as if they did not notice this. Occasionally Sunny would notice a few of her members steal glances to Taeyeon’s table with a mixture of pain and pity on their faces, but none of them moved to sit with their leader, who was gingerly cutting up her sausages into less than bite-sized pieces with no intention of actually putting one into .

Tiffany had enough of it after awhile and placed her hand over Taeyeon’s, immediately stopping her mindless mutilation of the sausages. Sunny could see a small understanding smile on Tiffany’s face as she pushed the plate with the mashed sausages aside and silently replaced it with a fresh one filled with bacon and eggs. Something seemed to flash behind Taeyeon’s eye and she noticeably bit her lower lip which had started to quiver slightly before getting up to excuse herself. Tiffany wiped her hands off on a napkin and got up to follow her best friend, leaving the other 6 members of the group to look at each other as if wondering if they should get up as well.

“Please don’t stay angry at Taeng.”

Jessica’s request from this morning echoed through her head. Sunny found that today she wasn’t angry at Taeyeon. She was a myriad of emotions, but anger was not one of them. Sighing, she made to get up to check on her leader when she noticed a figure walking past her swiftly. Sunny looked up just to see Seohyun’s back disappearing around the corner closely followed by Sooyoung. Sunny looked to the remainder of the people at the table and she watched as Yuri continued to engulf her breakfast as if nothing had transpired at all, while Hyoyeon was torn between getting up and staying, leaving her in an awkward position with her hovering above her chair. Yoona was just looking at Sunny for guidance, and Sunny was sure that if she had decided to get up to follow Taeyeon, Yoona would have been right behind her and that would most probably spur Hyoyeon to move as well.

Sunny couldn’t do that though. She couldn’t exactly leave Yuri all alone at the table because then if would seem like all of them were ganging up on her instead. So, Sunny tore her eyes away from Yoona’s and continued to eat, pretending as if she didn’t want to be anywhere else but at that dining table, and that nothing else would bring more contentment into her life then polishing her plate clean of all this food that she suddenly had no more appetite for.

The girls returned a few minutes later sans Taeyeon, and Sunny assumed that the leader must have retreated back to her room early. She was curious as to what happened when the other girls followed their leader and where they went. She supposed she could ask someone about it later.

Sunny wondered if Yuri knew that Jessica came into her room last night after leaving Yuri’s. There was a look on Yuri’s face that advised Sunny against asking her however. The rest of the girls continued eating their breakfast and it was one of the most uncomfortable and awkward moments in the group’s history together.

*****************************************************************

Their flight back was going to be later in the evening, so Sunny took her time packing up her suitcase. It usually didn’t take her long to pack because she wasn’t exactly the most fashionable of the SNSD members. She didn’t travel around with a lot of clothes, so she knew she could finish packing in no time.

Sunny glanced out her window and looked out onto the city of Shenzhen in the middle of folding a tshirt. Jessica was somewhere out there. She found out from her manager earlier that day that Jessica had woken up earlier than the rest of them and had checked out from the hotel. That in itself showed Jessica’s determination to avoid the rest of her members since “Jessica” and “Woke up early” were two sets of words that were never used together in the same sentence before.

Where was Jessica now? Where would she go? A part of Sunny sort of envied her former groupmate since she herself did not have the luxury of freedom. She couldn’t just decide that she was going to go take a walk outside to get a cup of coffee. There were security protocols that had to be maintained. She found it ridiculous at times. She was just a singer and a performer, not some politician deserving of such high security detail. Sunny would be lying if she said that this idol life that had suffocated Jessie was not constricting herself as well.

BZZZT!

The sound of the doorbell snapped her out of her thoughts and made her drop the tshirt she was holding. Sunny stared inquisitively at the door and bent over to pick up her tshirt and tossed it onto the bed before moving to open it.

“Yo!” Sooyoung cheerfully greeted as soon as Sunny opened the door for her.

“What’s up Soo?” Sunny said, trying to match her friend’s level of cheeriness but failing. Sunny found it odd. Usually she was the cheery and bright one, and even when she wasn’t feeling particularly happy she could always put up a pretty convincing front but right at that moment she couldn’t find the energy to bring a faux smile on her face so all her friend got was a small, forced, tug on her lips.

“I finished packing so I came here to annoy you and get your attention. I’m coming in!” Sooyoung said and sidestepped Sunny to get into her room, immediately breaking into a short run and jumped onto the bed, sending clothes and various toiletries flying everywhere.

“Soo! You’re making a mess of everything!” Sunny chastised and was about to kick her friend off the bed but couldn’t help but laugh as Sooyoung started making snow angels with her clothes, waving her arms and legs against the silky covers.

“Everything was already messed up. I didn’t do nothing to make it worse.” Sooyoung said, and Sunny didn’t miss the underlying meaning behind her words.

“Yeah well, I really need to continue packing. Can’t you play with Yuri or Seohyun? I’m sure they’ve finished packing.” Sunny suggested.

“Nah. They’re no fun.” Sooyoung said and turned over so that she was laying on the bed on her stomach, chin propped on her arms as she watched Sunny clean up after her mess.

“I notice you weren’t talking much during breakfast.” Sooyoung finally said after an extended period of silence.

“That’s cause I was too busy eating!” Sunny tried to brush it off with a feeble attempt at laughing, but she knew that Sooyoung could see right through her. Either her acting skills have gotten worse, or the people around her have gotten more observant lately.

Sooyoung sighed.

“Hyomin is worried about you y’know? She texted me to ask how you were doing. She warned me that you would pretend to be okay, and had she not given me the heads up beforehand I would most probably have believed you.” Sooyoung admitted, leaving Sunny dumbstruck. So it was Hyomin. It’s amazing how that girl knew her so well that they could be in different countries and she would still know what’s going through Sunny’s mind.

“Well, every single one of us ain’t exactly doing too good right now. It’s kinda weird to just zone in on how I’m doing. Everyone is hurting.” Sunny finally answered, tucking the last article of clothing into her suitcase.

“Yeah but usually you’re there to pick us all back up when we’re down. It’s something you have a knack for, and it’s something that I can’t do alone. You’re like a ray of sunshine when we need it most. Now that you’re feeling down, fixing the sun is the only method I can think of to get us together again.”

“Fixing the sun? I didn’t know you had an engineering degree.” Sunny said with a small teasing smirk.

“You’re right, I don’t.” Sooyoung quietly replied, and there was a hint of sadness in her voice that Sunny did not miss, and there was a tonal shift in the weight of the air around them. Did Sunny strike a nerve accidentally?

“Are we…bad people Sunny?” Sooyoung asked her finally, slowly sitting up onto her knees to look into Sunny’s eyes.

“What? Where did that come from?” Sunny was confused at the random question.

“It’s just that…we’ve spent every day with you at the dorms. We see you all the time but we can never tell what goes on in your head whereas you only see Hyomin maybe once a month but she can immediately tell if something is upsetting you. Maybe if we paid a little more attention… if we cared just a little bit more, like if we just supported her more… maybe we could have prevented this whole Sica thing from happening…”

Sooyoung paused and for a second Sunny thought that the taller girl was going to cry because the silence was so heavy, but instead she just took in a deep breath and continued.

“We know you’re happier in the Roommate house Sunny. We can see it when we watch the show. We always thought you were happy when you were with us, but after hearing you laugh and seeing you smile on the show we’ve all realized that you haven’t been that happy around us for a long time. I’m sorry if we’ve made things hard for you Sunny.”

Sooyoung’s apology came completely out of left field so Sunny had no idea how to react to it. She knew exactly what Sooyoung was talking about however, because she knew she was guilty of it as well, remembering the conversation she had with Jessica the night before. Sunny had no idea how she managed to miss a whole love triangle brewing between Jessica, Yuri and Taeng all these years when she considered herself close friends with all three of them.

“No need to apologize Soo. I’m guilty of it too. We’ve all got to work on the paying attention side of things.”

Sooyoung just nodded slowly while pursing her lips. The taller girl got up from the bed and stood in front of Sunny, fidgeting slightly before pulling her into a tight hug. Sunny was taken aback by this but reciprocated the embrace, observing Sooyoung’s face out of the corner of her eyes. The shikshin was acting weird, all cheerful when she came into the room but now she looked almost solemn all in the span of maybe 15 minutes.

“Sunny?” Sooyoung lightly said with an uncertainty that was unfamiliar to both of them. It was as if Sooyoung was verbally threading on eggshells, not wanting her words to sound too heavy for fear that it would break…something.

“Hmmm?” Sunny acknowledged, and watched as her friend unwrapped her arms from around her and just looked into her eyes, hands resting on the shorter girl’s shoulders. Sunny noted offhandedly that their height difference was more pronounced in this posture.

“Please don’t leave. You don’t exactly open up to us, and I know we don’t exactly make it easy for you to do so, but just know that we are your sisters and we are here for you whenever you need to talk… or something. Just putting that out there.” Sooyoung struggled to get the words out and seemed to rush it in the end but she got her message across.

Sunny’s eyes opened wide as she took in the sincerity and vulnerability in Sooyoung’s. So this was what was bothering her friend. Did all their other members feel the same way? Maybe there had been times that Sunny might have felt like quitting, but those had only been nothing more than passing notions. Still, she guessed that her putting up a false smile was finally found out and that worried her other members.

“I’ve got no plans on leaving the group Soo. I promise. You don’t have to worry about that.”

It was almost as if Sunny could see the weight being lifted off of her friend’s shoulders. The taller girl blinked a few times before the familiar mischievous grin that Sunny was accustomed to seeing on Sooyoung’s face graced her features again.

“Well that’s good because I can’t imagine having to take care of the other members when you’re gone. God knows that nobody else here is emotionally stable enough anymore.” Sooyoung joked and ruffled her shorter friend’s hair, earning a yelp and a complain.

“I liked it better when you were serious and on the verge of tears.” Sunny lied while trying to keep up an annoyed expression as she struggled to fix her now unkempt hair.

“Yah! I don’t cry!” Sunny received a light jab to her shoulder from the shikshin and laughed at the expression on Sooyoung’s face, who looked as if Sunny had just accused her of betraying her country.

“Alright alright. You don’t cry. You have a heart made of stone.” Sunny raised her hands in front of her in defeat, softly chuckling.

“Make that heart of diamonds. Diamonds are harder and shinier.”

“What an expensive heart you have! Kyung Ho oppa is lucky that he owns something so precious.” Sunny teased, getting a thrill at seeing the blush spread on her friend’s cheeks.

“And you have a tongue that’s a bit too smooth sometimes. Cheeky too. I’m sure Hyomin has her hands full with you.” Sooyoung said while pinching Sunny’s cheeks.

“I’m sure her hands will be pretty full of me when I get back to her later today.” Sunny giggled suggestively at Sooyoung’s retreating back as the latter had turned to leave the room.

“Too much info! But before you get into any lovey-dovey stuff why don’t you start by replying her messages? I’ve been getting more messages from Hyomin than my boyfriend lately. Stop worrying about us and pay more attention to your girlfriend.” Sooyoung said with one hand on the handle of the door.

“Lovey Dovey is a T-ara song.” Sunny said out of instinct and laughed at her own Hyomin-level joke.

Sooyoung just looked over her shoulder with an eyebrow raised before shaking her head and smiling at her friend. She may not have an engineering degree, but she did quite alright at fixing Sunny.

“Dork.” Sooyoung muttered just loud enough for her still laughing friend to hear before closing the door behind her.

Suddenly Sunny became hyper-aware of how quiet the hotel room was with Sooyoung’s absence. Her laughter subsided after a few minutes and she was left standing there in front of her bed with a packed suitcase beside her.

She missed Hyomin dearly. She wanted nothing more than to wrap her arms around the T-ara member and continue where they left off at Hyomin’s apartment, although the recollection left Sunny blushing. Hyomin wasn’t the first girl she’s kissed, but it felt different. She felt tingly and excited just thinking about spending more time with her friend.

Friend? Girlfriend? She really needed to get that sorted out as well.

Sunny wasn’t purposely ignoring Hyomin’s messages. Well, actually she was but there were no malicious intentions behind it. There was just a lot of things on her mind for the past few days and Sunny felt that Hyomin deserved nothing less than her absolute undivided attention, which Sunny could not afford to give her at the moment. Now she felt bad for not giving proper attentiveness to Hyomin.

Sunny reached for her phone that was on the nightstand, groaning slightly when she read how many messages she’s missed since the last time she’s checked it. There were messages from friends asking her for details about Jessica’s leave, messages to cheer her up, and a few from people that she did not even know. Sunny sat down on her bed slowly going through them and replying the ones that she felt like replying.

Opening a picture message from an unknown number, she saw 5 young boys sitting around a table drinking soju, offering the bottles up to the camera. For a moment Sunny was worried that her fans had somehow managed to get a hold of her number, but there was something familiar about these boys. Her eyes scrolled down to the message sent after the picture.

To our teachers, we don’t know what happened but please stay strong! Have a drink and remove that frown from your faces.

-From the Dangerous Boys.

Sunny’s eyes widened immediately and she enlarged the picture to study each and every face in the picture. There was no denying it, although they looked significantly more mature. These were the 5 delinquents that Sunny and her group had mentored and guided to become better people in that TV show they shot a few years back, Girls’ Generation and The Dangerous Boys. Sunny smiled as she remembered how these delinquents went from brash kids to mature, responsible young adults and from this picture it looked like they still remained friends even after the show.

Sunny couldn’t help but feel proud, and a slight bittersweet feeling as well. They had the power to change lives. It wasn’t just about them. Every action she does has the ability to positively affect another person, and the adverse can be said as well.

This thought was enough to clear Sunny’s mind. She didn’t feel down anymore, rather determined. They can’t change lives when they aren’t united, and as much as she didn’t like to admit it Sooyoung was right when she said that Sunny was the best kind of glue to bring them together again.

She decided that she’ll talk to Taeyeon and Yuri the next time she gets the chance.

'For the fans, and for Jessica.'

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It was like, "how do I get Sunny back on track and assume her role as the energizer bunny of SNSD? How do I stop her from being confused and conflicted and remind her that SNSD needs her to be the cheering squad again?" That was the purpose of this chapter, and I have no idea why it was so hard to write it.

This chapter took me a whole month and a half to write it. There were times where I had no idea what I was writing or what point I was trying to make, and there were other times when I just wasn't happy with the flow of the chapter. I guess I'm kinda happy with how this turned out, although I'm pretty sure I could have done better. Sorry for the late update again! The next chapter is going to be the longest one so far, so hopefully all of you keep sticking with me till then! Thank you so much! 

It's finals time and I'm distracting myself from the stress of studying by writing. Hahahaha 

Also HUUUGE shoutout to mostly_sunny_ for the upvote! It's my first upvote in awhile and I really appreciate it! It really feels good to know that people are enjoying my story! Also thanks to all the superstars who leave comments! All of you are amazing!