POV CHANGE
Bambam

I dial the number from the card into Mark’s phone and press the phone hard against my ear. I’m incredibly excited to call Jackson. I’ve waited and searched for two weeks and finally I can contact him.
“Mark?” he answers. His voice sounds a bit surprised. I’m taken aback by this. Mark?
“Um hi this is Bambam,” I tell him.
“Oh Baby Bambam hello,” he says. I smile. I love it when he calls me that. His voice sounds really y over the phone and I just want to see him in person. But I have something to focus on at the moment.
“You said Mark when I called,” I point out.
“Oh um yeah,” he replies. What type of answer is that?
“Why?” I ask.
“You called me at a bad time babe. I was taking a nap and I just happened to be dreaming about a guy named Mark.”
“So when I called-.”
“I was thinking of him,” he replies. Seems honest enough. I cross my legs.
“And who is he exactly?”
“You’re a really curious kid Bambam,” Jackson says. His voice sounds slow and faint. Now that I know I can actually tell that he was sleeping. His tired voice is very seductive.  
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine. Anyway what’s up?”
“So about this weekend.” 

POV CHANGE

Mark

“Mark, I don’t see why you’re freaking out. So what if Bambam likes this Jackson guy? If he likes someone he likes someone and we should be happy when they start dating,” Jinyoung, my closest friend tells me.
“Jin, you don’t understand,” I tell him.
“And what do I not understand?” he asks. I rub my face and put my head down on the table.
“The person he likes is Jackson Wang,” I mutter. Jr. sits up quickly.
“JACKSON WANG?! As in Jackson freaking Wild and y Wang? The same one who’s model now? The same one who broke your heart two years ago and for some reason you still have feelings for him?” Jr. asks. Before I can mumble a yes I realize what he said.
“I do not still have feelings for that guy!” I yell at him as I sit back up.
“Oh my gosh. Bambam likes him?!”
“Yes! Do you see my problem?”
“No, not really,” Jr. says flatly.
“How could you not!? I live with Bambam who is probably going to start dating my ex. What if they get serious? What if Bambam brings him here? I can’t keep hiding the fact that I used to date Jackson!”
“And you also can’t hide the fact that you’re still incredibly in love with him after all this time.”
“I do not!”
“You do too!”
“Do not!”
“Do too!”
“Do NOT!” I yell. 
“DO TOO!” I pounce myself on Jr. and we crash onto the floor. We start to wrestle and I bite on Jr.’s leg.
“Do not,” I mutter. Jr. pulls my hair.
“Do too.” I scream as he yanks on my hair really hard.
“What is going on out here!?” Bambam asks looking down at us. Jr. and I part from each other straightening our clothes. “Gosh you hyungs act like children.”
“You look dressed up,” Jr. points out.
“I’m going on a date today,” Bambam says fixing his shirt.
“Date?” I ask. He nods.
“Jackson and I are going to meet up,” he tells us. Jr. looks at me. 
“I hope you two have fun. When are you leaving?” Jr. asks. Bambam looks at his watch. He never wears his watch.
“Now,” he says. “Wish me luck guys.”
“Good luck~,” Jr. says waving at Bambam as he leaves. I wait until the door closes
“We need to follow him,” I tell Jr. immediately.
“Uh huh. And do what? Ruin their date?”
“Yes!?”
“And why?”
“This is cliche all of it is too cliche. We need to spice things up,” I tell him.
“Hmm isn’t this cliche?”
“What?”
“The whole ex boyfriend falling in love with his ex again.”
“What? I don’t know what you’re talking about. Come on.”

We follow Bambam into a bakery. Jackson’s already there and Bambam nervously bows.
“Am I late?” Bambam asks. Jackson looks at his phone.
“No,” he replies with a smile.
“Good, I was going to make up an excuse,” Bambam tells him. That makes Jackson laugh. Even his laugh is the same. Everything about Jackson so far is the same.
“Who goes to a bakery on their first date?” I ask Jr.
“People who love pastries. I think I’m in the mood for cake,” Jr. says.
“Then we should get some.” We step into the store after a five minute pause. That gives Jackson and Bambam enough time to settle down and get their cakes. I turn to them and act very surprised.
“Bambam!? What are you doing here?” I ask him.
“Me? What are you doing here?” Bambam asks.
“Jin was in the mood for cake so we’re here,” I shrug. Bambam looks as if he swallowed poop. His expression is far from happy.
“Jackson is that you?” Jr. asks.
“Hello Jinyoung,” Jackson says putting his fork down.
“Oh man it’s been such a long time! Mind if I sit?” Without waiting for an answer Jr. pulls up a chair and sits at their table I do the same.
“Wait you two know each other?” Bambam asks.
“Aish look at you,” Jr. says ignoring the question. He pinches Jackson’s cheek. “You’ve gotten very muscular. Two years have done you well.”
“And you still look the same,” Jackson tells Jr. I eat my cake as I watch Bambam suffer. I can see the steam coming off his head.
“You two know each other!?” he yells. Jackson looks over at him.
“Oh yeah Jinyoung and I-.”
“Met in high school,” Jr. says. “The last time I saw him was two years ago because well happens,” Jr. shrugs.
“It was mostly my fault,” Jackson says looking over at me.
“Aish don’t do that to yourself,” Jr. says patting his back. “It was everyone’s fault.”
‘What exactly happened?” Bambam asks lifting an eyebrow. I panic. What do I say?
“We split ways. Jackson was more into his modeling career and me my acting career. And our other close friend was depressed.” I kick Jin knowing he’s referring to me as the depressed one.
“You’re forgetting JB,” Jackson reminds him.
“Ah! Where is he? Do you two still talk?” Jr. asks. I’m actually curious.
“I do. He’s still bboying.”
“Ah can you believe that? We should all get together and have a reunion,” Jr. says.
“What about the depressed friend?” Bambam asks.
“He’s in our hearts,” Jackson says.
“He’s dead!?” Bambam asks.
“What? No. He’d probably just not want to come,” Jr. replies.
“He’s in hiding,” Jackson says. I’m in hiding!? Okay Jackson is absolutely ridiculous.
“Okay, let’s talk about something else shall we?” I ask.
“Yeah let’s start with why you two are here,” Bambam says.
“Bam, don’t be rude. Jackson and Jr. are nice people.” Bambam’s face heats up. He’s not liking this at all. I honestly can’t blame the kid. But I’m not going to let this relationship go smoothly. And that is not because I have feelings for Jackson.  Because well I don’t.
“Ah Jackson you should try this. You’ll love it,” Jr. says. He takes a scoop of his cake and feeds it to Jackson who greatly enjoys it. Meanwhile Bambam looks like he just might blow up.
“Excuse me,” he says. He gets up from the table and leaves. I follow him to the restroom. Once inside Bambam kicks the trashcan.
“Ow!” he yells in pain.
“You okay?” I ask him.
“No I am not okay!” he yells at me. “You two ruined my date! You think it’s every day I get to date someone? You think Jackson and I have been on dates before? You’re ruining everything!” He picks up a trashcan and throws it at a guy using the urinal The poor guy falls to the ground probably still peeing. Then Bambam storms out of the room and goes outside hovering over Jackson and Jr.
“Yeah and then-.” Jr. stops talking and looks back to see an angry Bambam and screams. 
“Babe you okay?” Jackson asks. Then Bambam starts speaking in Thai. And that makes Jackson laugh. “What?!” he yells in between laughs.
“I hate you Jinyoung!” Bambam yells and he runs off.

Jr. and I go up the elevator heading back to my place to see if Bambam’s there. We haven’t seen him since he ran out. Jackson’s been calling and hasn’t gotten an answer.
“Well that was fun,” Jr. says.
“It looks like you had fun,”  I tell him.
“It really that we all just split up after that incident,” Jr. comments.
“Well it’s not like I could be friends with him after that.”
“I don’t see why not,” Jr. says.
“Jin! We were high school sweethearts. For all four years of high school! And let’s not forget that I even bought a ring and he decided to break up with me the moment I kneeled down- ah I don’t want to talk about it.” I cross my arms over my chest and look away.
“You still have the ring,” Jr says softly.
“What?” I ask. I turn to face him.
“Most people would return it but you kept it Mark. It’s still in the box on your counter as if you’re waiting to propose to him again and hoping next time he’ll say yes.”
“Or I plan on using it when I meet someone else,” I tell him.
“But the ring is his size.”  I open my mouth to protest but there isn’t something to counter attack with.
“So what? That means after two years I still like him?” I ask.
“It means after two years you’re still in love with him.”

Chapter 4
Still in Denial 

I love him. 

I love him not.

I love him.

I love him not.

Holy kimchi I love him.
After all this time? That doesn’t make sense! Maybe I don’t. I can’t take Jr’s words for it. Or some stupid lily I picked up from the street. I mean what does some old flower know? 
I head back into my room to find Jr. curled up in a ball on my bed.
“Jin, get up,” I tell him. That of course doesn’t work so I shake him a little.
“Did you find him?” he asks.
“No, I didn’t,” I tell him.
“Call Jackson.”
“Um why?”
“Maybe he finally answered Jackson’s phone calls and they decided to meet up. Or more,” Jr says with a wink.
“You know maybe I don’t like him,” I tell Jr.
“You don’t. You love him.” He hugs my pillow and closes his eyes.
“No! You’re not getting it Jin. I’m not jealous at all. I’m actually okay with him dating Bambam.”
“You’re only okay with it because you get to see him now.”
“Hey I’m the one who decided to stop seeing him.”
“Actually you’re the one who was so sad that you spent months locked up in your room.” I frown at him.
“Can you stop bringing up the past. . .  please!” I plead with him.
“Just call him.” I walk into the living room with my phone in my hand. I don’t exactly have Jackson’s number anymore but I know Bambam called Jackson on my phone so it should be in my call log. I find the number and call it.
“Did you find him?” Jackson says right after answering.
“You saved my number,” I observe. I hear him groan on the other end. This phone call probably woke him up.
“You still have the same number,” he tells me back.
“What if I changed it?” I ask.
“Doesn’t matter. It’s not like I called you in two years much less contacted you.”
“I was calling to ask if Bam was with you but I guess he isn’t.”
“He was here,” Jackson says.
“What?”
“Last night. He came by and left. I thought he went home.”
“He didn’t.”
“Oh then I’ll ask him where he is.”
“Um no, no it’s fine. He has to come home eventually.”
“You two live together?” he asks.
“We do.”
“Oh.” It’s silent. “Well I hope he gets back safely and you two will make-up,” he says.
“Thanks.”
“Bye.”
“Um Jackson?”
“Yes?”
“Can we talk?”
“Mark, we are talking.”
“I mean in person. Sometime.” I hear movement on his end. I guess me wanting to talk later fully wakes him up.
“Oh sure. Of course Mark.”
‘Okay cool.”
“You choose the time and place and I’ll go with it.”
“What? Are you always free?”
“I’m free when it comes to you.”
“What?” I let out a nervous laugh. “Should you really be saying things like that?”
“Sorry.”
“It’s fine. Tonight at 8 by the lake. Is that okay?”
“It is.”
“See you then.”
“Bye.”
I’m taken by surprise that he actually remembers the lake. The lake we visited often. The lake we shared our first kiss. There are so many memories there. How could he forget? Well the same reason he broke up with me I guess. I shrug this off when the doorbell rings.

At the door is my next door neighbor, Youngjae with a very sad Bambam.
“Missing something?” Youngjae asks.
“Bam!” I yell. He’s leaning heavily on Youngjae. Youngjae hands him over and Bambam leans on me. His head pressed against my shoulder and his body feels limp and heavy at the same time. “Was he at your house this entire time?” I ask.
“No, he was in my ice cream shop eating almost all of the ice cream. I don’t know how he got in. But when I opened the store there he was. Like some little beast eating away.” Youngjae glares at Bambam. “Now I can’t open the store today.”
“I am so sorry. Here I’ll pay for it.”
“No, it’s fine. This kid looks pretty broken up about something. And sick, that was a lot of ice cream.” Bambam’s head bobs a little and his jaw falls open.
“Thanks Youngjae I’m very sorry for all the trouble.”
“Uh huh.” He waves at me and leaves. I take Bambam into his room.

“He ate a whole ice cream shop?” Jr. asks. 
“No, he ate pretty much all of the ice cream inside of a shop,” I tell him. We stand over Bambam as he grunts and groans in pain. He holds his stomach and lies in bed in a very tight ball.
“Might as well have eaten the shop,” Jr shrugs. 
“Bam, do you need to throw up again?” I ask him. He nods his head and I grab the bucket.
“This won’t do. I’ll go get painkillers and water,” Jr. says.
“Thanks Jin.”
“Bam, what’s wrong? Didn’t you go see Jackson last night?” I ask.
“He hates me,” Bambam cries.
“What?”
“And it’s all your fault.” He grips the bucket and throws up. “I went over and suggested we do it and he rejected me. Said we should take it slow.” Tears trail down Bambam’s face. “But I know what he’s really saying. He’s saying we shouldn’t meet.”
“I don’t know Bam. I’m pretty sure he actually wants to take it slow.”
“Why would he!?” He tosses the bucket to the floor. Ew. “We already did it once. Why not do it again?”
“Because Bam. That time was a drunken mistake. Jackson just doesn’t want to do it again.”
“So it’s a mistake? He never wants to do it with me again?” he asks. Tears trail down his eyes.
“No, Bam. I think.” I pause the words don’t want to come out but I have to tell him. He needs to hear this. “I think Jackson . . .likes you now.”
“He does!?” Bambam asks completely surprised. I nod my head at him.
“Why else would he want to take it slow?” I shrug. Bambam reaches for me and rubs my cheek.
“Hyung, why are you crying?” he asks. I inhale as I feel more tears trail down my face.
“I’m just so happy for you,” I tell him. I force a smile and he smiles too. I wipe the tears from Bambam’s eyes. “You look a lot better when you smile.”
“You know Bam when most people are feeling down they drink. You just eat a whole lot of ice cream,” Jr. says walking into the room. He hands Bambam painkillers and water. “And honestly I can’t say which one’s worse. We get the same results. Throw up and pain.” Jr. laughs at what he said. “I’m so funny.”
“No you’re not Jin hyung,” Bambam says. He swallows the pill. “Um can you two leave? I’m going to call Jackson.” I nod and exit the room. Jr. closes the door behind him.
“Mark,” he says softly. I lean into him and he wraps his arms around me in a tight hug.
“He likes him Jin,” I cry against him. I try to keep my voice down so Bambam won’t hear.
“We don’t know that for sure.”
“But I do. I know him more than anyone, remember?”
“And I know you.”
“This hurts.”
“I know.”
“I can’t believe I still have feelings for him.”
“I know.”
“It’s been two years!” I shout. Jr. grips the back of my head.
“Shh Bam will hear.”
“This isn’t right Jin. I don’t like this.” The tears come more rapidly and I feel all of me get sad and weak.
“Honestly Mark. This is probably for the best.” I wail.