Warning: Bad language and slightly mature context

   I jumped out of bed when I heard a shrill cry filled the dorm building.  Amber rushed out with her baseball bat followed by Maki with a harpoon, Lihua clutching her bunny teddy bear, and Sinn cocking her gun….wait…

    “Sinn!  What the hell are you doing with a gun!  That’s illegal!” I yelled.

    Sinn poked her head from the doorframe to look at me.  Slowly, she lifted a finger with a soft shhhh.  I stood there dumbfounded for a second then ran after them.

    We ran down the hall to the room where the cry was coming from, and Amber kicked the door opened.

    “Who wants to die!” Amber yelled with the bat raised above her head.

    Three girls were comforting another girl who was sobbing with her face covered.  One of the girls looked up with a distraught face.

    “Unnie!  Look!”  She said to Amber handing her a white piece of paper.

    Amber took it and read it outloud,

    Hello faire Maiden,

    I have taken a piece of you in order to add it to my collection.  Fear not, for it was not a lock of hair or old fingernail clippings, no, for I have taken something much more to my liking, a black laced bra and thong.  They will serve me well, and since I took a piece of you I shall leave a piece of me.  This note and this rose.

                                XOXO,

                                     Tuxedo ;D

    “What a ert.”  Maki said with a disgusted face.

    “What am I suppose to do with a rose!” The victim, Kim Yura, cried.

    “Clearly that’s not going to hold your s up,” Sinn leaned her back against the wall crossing her arms, “Pretty positive that that won’t even cover your nips.”

    Yura’s face turned bright red and I swatted Sinn’s arm, to which she just shrugged.  I turned to Amber with a serious look, “This is the eighth one within two weeks.  We need to report this to the Dean.”  This ert has been going stealing underwear in our dorm, and it needs to stop.

    Sighing, Amber held her forehead with an annoyed look on her face, “Going to the Dean won’t help us any.  The crazy broad is on ‘vacation’.”

    “Vacation-THE SCHOOL YEAR JUST STARTED!” That woman is unbelievable.

    “We have to do something!” Yura sobbed, more tears flowing from her eyes.

    “I say we catch the prick.”  Sinn suggested.

    “At this rate, that’s our only option.”  Amber breathed.

    We all sat on our beds, exception of Maki who was leaning on Amber, trying to devise a plan.  None of our ideas were great: Maki wanted to burn all three male dorms down to ensure we got him, Lihua wanted to lay out cupcakes and catch him with a butterfly net, Amber wanted to start an Inquisition, and Sinn agreed with Amber saying that she volunteered and that it would be no problem getting them to tell the truth with a gun to their heads.  Yeah, can you believe that none of them or alcoholics or drug addicts.  No?  Me neither.

    “I wonder why he hasn’t stolen from us yet?” Maki asked with a cute little face.

    “Well, we aren’t really well endowed.  Hot yes, but not ilicious.  Hyoyeon, though, has a really nice rack.”  Sinn answered pointing her thumb to me, “And besides, no one would dare enter when I have The Terminator.”  She held up her gun, apparently named The Terminator, with an evil grin.

    I shoved her hand down that was holding the gun, “Get rid of it!  It’s dangerous!” even more so that it’s in Sinn’s possession.

    She gave me a pouted look, “The safety is on,” click, “Now.”

    “How about we wait till tomorrow and ask Luhan and the others for help.”

    “Yes, yes.  They will be the first to encounter, The Terminator-”

    “Put it away Sinn.” I ordered as she mumbled under her breath about me not letting her have any fun.

    The next day, I sat alone, like usual, in dance class trying to come up with a way to catch the dirty .  I didn’t even realised EXO K were around me.

    “Hey!” Kai shouted.

    I glared at him with annoyance clearly written on my face, “The hell do you want?”

    Kai gave a tsk, before shoving his hands in his pockets, “Sehun was asking you something stupid.”

    “What do you want?” I asked Sehun venom in my voice.

    Sehun was startled by my aggressiveness, that he had to collect himself, “My fling Yura told me that there’s a ert stealing girl stuff in your dorms.”

    “If it’s you doing it, I’m punching you in the face.”  

    He leaned back with wide eyes waving his hands, “No no no!  It’s not me!  Or any of us!  I just want to help you catch this guy, and I got the others to agree to help!”

    I gave them all a suspicious look, “Why do you want to help?”

    “No one is going to collect any of my flings bras or but me!”  Sehun answered with fire in his eyes.

    “How many flings do you have?” he opened his mouth to answer, but I held a hand up to stop him, “Don’t answer that.”

    Kai grunted, “So annoying.  Do you want us to help or not?”

    “Nobody wants your help, so go away.”  I spat back.

    “Don’t tell me what to do!” he yelled.

    “You don’t want to help, and you’re not allowed to help, so bye!” I waved him away.

    “ you!  Now I’m going to help, and you can’t say about it!”

    “No!  We don’t need it!”  I stepped up to him.

    “I don’t give a if you need it or not, I’m doing it.”  He seethed through his teeth.

    D.O. groaned and pulled Kai by the ear, “We’ll meet you guys at your table at lunch.” he then pulled a shouting Kai away as the others followed.

    “So, yeah, that’s basically it.” Amber finished filling the boys in on Tuxedo .

    “Why didn’t you tell us sooner?” Luhan asked with a soft tone.

    “Why didn’t we think of this idea first?” Chen thought out loud nudging Tao, who nodded in agreement.  Xiumin whacked both of their heads.

    “What kind of man does that?” Lay said with a disgusted face.

    “Maybe it isn’t even a guy!  Maybe it’s a girl…”  Chen whispered with shifty eyes.

    “Ohhhh, and she’s just too cheap to buy her own so she’s stealing others.” Tao added.

    “Or she’s into girls, and I’m into girls who are into girls, so if the culprit is a girl, I say we let the girl go.  Girl on girl is hot.”  Chen finished his unnecessary statement while crossing his arms.

    “What if she looks like a big nasty bag of rotting potatoes?”  Tao asked him.

    “Then we punish her!”  Chen fist pumped the air.

    Xiumin covered his face and groaned, “Don’t make me beat you two up.”

    “By the way,” I interrupted everyone from throwing things at Chen and Tao, “EXO K heard about it, so….” my eyes began shifting side to side.

    “Yes?” Luhan asked pushing me to continue.

    “Well, they want to help us find him…” I finished quietly.

    “Absolutely not.”  Sinn answered.

    “Yeah, not happening.” Amber agreed shaking her head.

    “Besides, all we need is The Terminator.”  Sinn grinned.

    “Who?”  Lay turned to her and asked.

    “I’ll show you!”  Sinn chirped.

    Quickly I held out an arm to stop her, “NO!  No.  Nobody wants to know or see.”

    “See what?”  Suho asked innocently with the rest of his crew behind him.

    “Weapons.  I have weapons.”  Sinn answered coolly.

    Lihua raised her arm up, “I have a taser!  It has cute little bunnies and cupcakes on it!”

    “Whatever.  What’s the plan?”  Kai asked snobbishly.

    “Who says we are letting you guys help?” Xiumin raised an eyebrow at them, daring them to try to answer his question.

    “I think we should let them help.”  Luhan said out of nowhere.  We all turned to him in disbelief.  “We have no clue who it is, so the more eyes the better.”

    “I agree.  We can put our differences aside and work together this one time.”  Suho added.

    “I’ll ask again, what’s the plan?”  Kai ran his hand through his hair in annoyance.

    “No clue.”  Chen answered leaning back on his chair with his arms crossed.

    “We need bait.”  Amber said rubbing her chin.

    “We can use Hyoyeon’s.  She has a nice pair of melons.”  Sinn suggested nonchalantly.

    My face turned deep red, as I heard Kai scoff.  I whipped my head to him glaring daggers at him, “Excuse you?”

    “They’re not that great.”  he rolled his eyes.

    “What!”

    Chen slammed his hands on the table then stood up.  He began pulling up his sleeves, “Alright.  I got this.  I’ll squeeze them and see if they are or not.”  Before he could make a step toward me, Xiumin pulled him down to his seat.  Then he gave him another whack to the head.

    Tao, Sehun, Chanyeol, and Baekhyun raised their hands, “I’ll do it!” they yelled in unison.  I covered my face with my hands and groaned.  I really hate my life.

    Everything was still and quiet that night as they waited for Tuxedo .

    “Is everyone in position?”  Luhan asked over the walkie talkie, and they all replied back confirming they were.  “Alright, let’s take this ert down.”

    A dark shadow dashed through the hallways.  It came to a stop in front of a door.  Cautiously, the figure quietly opened it and slid in.  It slowly crept past one of the beds and reached for a dresser.  Just as it was about to open it, Hyoyeon threw the covers off of her from the bed, and handcuff him to the metal handle of the dresser.

    “Looking for something?”  She asked with a smug face.

    “My question is, what the hell are you wearing?”  Sinn asked stepping out from behind the curtains, “Lay come look at this fool!”

    Lay slid the bathroom door opened, “Cosplay?”

    “I’m dressed like Tuxedo Mask you idiots!  You know from Sailor Moon!”  Tuxedo yelled.  They guy was wearing a tuxedo with a top hat and a white masquerade mask covering half of his face.

    “Ohh, okay I get it now, Tuxedo Mask.  Tuxedo .”  Sinn nodded her head fulling understanding the connection.

    “Well, ert, we are going to beat you to death.”  Hyoyeon glared.

    Lay began cracking his knuckles and stretching his neck, “Yeah, I hate erts.  Well, except for Chen and Tao.  They are harmless.”

    “You fools.” Next thing they knew Tuxedo ripped the drawer out, and threw it at Lay.  Lay barely caught it in time and stumbled backwards.  Hyoyeon shouted to Lay, and then heard a click.  Tuxedo manage to uncuff the drawer, and then recuff himself to Hyoyeon’s right arm.  He gave her a wink and a kissy face.

    “What the hell-”

    “Sorry babe, I need protection.”  He interrupted Hyoyeon.  Sinn dashed at him in full swing for a punch, and he quickly pulled Hyoyeon up in front of him so she could take the blow.  Sinn managed to stop herself in time, but lost balance.  Then the ert did a low sweep to her legs knocking her down.

    “HAHAHAHA!  Fools!  I am Tuxedo and you’ll never catch me!” he then lifted Hyoyeon onto his shoulder.  It was very uncomfortable for Hyoyeon because her right wrist was still attached to his left wrist.

    “Let me go!” Hyoyeon ordered.

    “I will once it’s safe enough for me.”  He dashed out the room and went down the hall.  

    Lay helped Sinn up and pulled out his walkie talkie, “Sehun.  Tao.  He’s heading your way and he has Hyoyeon.”

    “Roger that.”  Tao answered.

    Sighing, Lay turned to look at Sinn who pulled out The Terminator and was cocking it.  “What the-No!  Put that away!  Are you crazy!”  Lay began struggling with Sinn for the gun.

    “Just one shot to the leg is all I’m asking for!  No one will know!”  Sinn tried reasoning.

    “No you crazy woman!”

    “I’m feeling good tonight-”

    “Put me down!” Hyoyeon interrupted his singing.

    “No can do pretty lady.”  He came to a stop when Tao and Sehun stepped out from the end of the hallway.

    “Put her down and surrender nicely.”  Tao said lowly.

    “Or what?”  Tuxedo grinned.

    “Tsk, or we kick your , duh.” Sehun answered.

    “ Let’s see shall we?” he then made a dash towards them.

    Tao and Sehun readied themselves, and the ert did an aerial spiral kick to Tao.  Tao easily blocked it with his left forearm and swung a punch to his gut.  He jumped back in time to avoid it, and then Sehun lunged a left hook to his face.  Leaning back he manage to dodge it, and made a quick jab to Sehun’s ribs.

    “You .”  Sehun gritted his teeth.

    “What are you?  All talk?”  The ert gloated.

    Then Tao whipped out a wooden staff, and began attacking him.

    “Careful Tao!  I’m still here!”  Hyoyeon panicked.

    Sehun recovered and began attacking alongside Tao.  Tuxedo was able to dodge all their attacks, but he was backed up against a door.

    “Now what are you going to do prick?” Sehun asked coyly.

    Tuxedo just grinned, “You’ll see.”

    The two boys lunged at him and once they were close enough he opened the door behind him.  He made a side step so the two fell in face first, and he just casually closed the door.  The two boys looked up to see girls wearing sleepwear that barely covered anything.  Instantly, their nose dripped blood, and Tao attempted to cover his eyes as Sehun mouth dropped.  The girls got up and surrounded them.

    “What the hell are you two think you’re doing in here?” one of the girls asked.

    “We were-”

    “Omigosh!  I bet their here to steal our underwear!” another girl shouted interrupting Tao.

    “What no!” Sehun started, but the girls began hitting them.

    Tao pulled out his walkie talkie, “Guys-OW!  We lost him!  He-AH!  May be headed your way, and-STOP KICKING ME!  HE HAS HYOYEON-AACK!”

    “Damn, Hyoyeon’s bra wasn’t good enough, so he had to take the whole thing.”  Chen said with wide eyes.  He, Baekhyun, and Chanyeol were all in separate recycling bins with the lids on their heads.

    “I wanna play too…” Baekhyun whined.

    “Guess we should get ready!” Chanyeol suggested.  They all nodded as they lowered themselves into the bin, and waited for the ert to come up the stairs where they were hiding.

    Few moments, later they heard Hyoyeon yelling and the sound of running footsteps.  They knew it was Tuxedo .  When they were sure he was right in front of them they jumped up with war cries throwing a net to catch him, too bad it didn’t,  Tuxedo turned around to see the net on the floor and the three guys looked dumbfounded.

    “Really?  We missed!”  Chen yelled in disbelief.

    “Really guys…” Hyoyeon covered her face in embarrassment.  The boys tried to quickly get out of the bins, but Tuxedo hit them all on the head causing them to fall into their bins.  Then one by one he kicked them down the stairs, and the only thing heard was their rolling bins and screams.  Once they all came to a stop Chen dizzily pulled out his walkie talkie, “Luhan...douchebag heading your way...has Hyoyeon…” he fell backwards with his arms sprawled out.

    “He’s coming.” Luhan informed Suho, Xiumin, and D.O.  He turned to Lihua who was down the hall.  She was holding a rope that held up a bucket to the ceiling.  “Get ready Lihua!”

    Just as he said that the ert ran right passed them with Hyoyeon crying for help.  The guys began running after him.  

    “Stop you creep!” D.O. yelled.

    They chased him further down the hall, and once Luhan decided the ert was close enough he yelled “Now!” to Lihua.

    “O-okay!”  Lihua pulled the rope and oil splashed down.  Unfortunately, she didn’t pull it in time so the ert kept going his merry way down the hall.  The others weren't so lucky and slid in the oil.  They slowly slid down to Lihua.

    “I missed…” she said softly.

    “We know Lihua.” Luhan answered with an even tone.

    “Woohoo!  Your friends are making this fun!” the ert danced down the hall.

    “Hey!  They are trying their hardest, so stop enjoying this!” Hyoyeon fumed.

    He barely tripped on a rope, obviously another trap, “What the hell…”, he put Hyoyeon down to examine it.  He rubbed his chin thoughtfully, “Wonder what’s next…”  Then there was a rumbling and the ground began shaking.  They turned to look down the hallway and there was a gigantic boulder coming straight for them.  Simultaneously, they screamed on top of their lungs.

    “RUN STUPID!” Hyoyeon yelled, and he quickly picked Hyoyeon up bridal style and booked it down the hall.

    Surprisingly, they were getting distance away from the boulder, but then harpoons and BB bullets were being shot at them.

    “WHAT THE HELL!”  Tuxedo looked back to see Amber and Maki running on top of the boulder.  Amber was firing her BB gun at him and Maki had her harpoon launcher sending harpoons at him too.  “WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOUR FRIENDS!”

    “NO USE RUNNING FROM US-MUAHAHAHA!  YOUR LIFE ENDS HERE!” Amber screeched minaically.

    “I’VE NEVER FELT MORE ALIVE!”  Maki yelled with glee.  They continued to fire at him, not realising that he had Hyoyeon and if they did they would have immediantly stopped everything, and they were getting excited when the boulder was getting closer.  Just when they thought they had him he made a right turn to a different hall.

    “What the hell!”  Amber turned back at them, then turn back around and realised that they are headed straight for the wall.

    They turned to look at each other and screamed.

    CRASH!  They sat up from the rubble counting sheeps, "We're okay..." they said in unison then fell backwards.

    “Your friends are insane!”

    “....yeah, I know…” Hyoyeon sulked.  He suddenly stopped and set Hyoyeon down on her feet.  Kai, Sinn, and Lay were standing quite coolly at the end of the hall.  Sinn was crouched down with a very long, rusty, chain in her hands.

    “Wanna give up now?” Sinn asked.

    “Why would I give up when I’ve been winning?” Tuxedo then wrapped an arm around Hyoyeon’s shoulder and place his lips against her ear, “Aren’t we having fun babe?”  Hyoyeon tried shoving him away in disgust.

    “Tsk.  I was itching for a fight anyways.”  Kai ran for him cracking his knuckles, and Lay was only a few steps behind him, “I’m gonna have so much fun beating your !”

    They both began attacking him and he dodge every attack.  Then he pulled a fencing sword, the safe ones they use in sparring classes, out of nowhere, and held his left arm against Hyoyeon chest.

    “Where the hell did he get a fencing sword?” Kai scoffed.

    “He’s going to use Hyoyeon as a shield.  We need to get her away from him.” Sinn warned them.

    He grinned, “Smart girl-” Lay cut him off with a left hook to his face.

    “What kind of man uses a woman as a shield?” Lay spat, and swung at him again, but Tuxedo quickly moved Hyoyeon in front of him.  Lay instantly stopped his movement, and the ert took advantage of it and jabbed Lay in the gut, smacked his left knee, and landed a blow on his back.

    “Lay!” Hyoyeon cried with worry for her friend, as he gasped in pain.

    “Kai.”  Sinn gave Kai a look and he nodded understanding her silent order.

    Kai began his attacks and was able to dodge Tuxedo attacks as well.  Kai grabbed Hyoyeon pulling her towards him who dragged the ert too.  Kai used the momentum and elbowed him in the face.  Tuxedo fell backwards in pain.  Taking the opportunity, Kai wrapped a hand around Hyoyeon’s waist, and gripped her cuff wrist stretching the chain that connected the two.  Then Sinn whipped her long chain down with enough force that broke the smaller chain binding the two together.  Sinn then did another whip that wrapped around his sword and she pulled it away, sending it flying behind her.

    “You okay?” Kai whispered to Hyoyeon softly in her ear that it took her by surprise.  She manage to nod her head yes.

    The ert quickly got up, but started getting wailed on by Lay.  Lay was landing good hits on him until the jerk threw something in Lay’s eyes.

    “What the hell!” Lay shouted before the guy punched Lay in the gut.  Falling to one knee, Lay gripped his stomach with one hand, and rubbed his eyes with the other.

    “That’s dirty man.” Kai said attacking him.  They took turns hitting each other, until Kai went down when he took a blow below the belt.  “That’s ing dirty you .”  Kai seethed through his teeth in pain and anger.  Hyoyeon ran to Kai placing her hands on his back and arm worryingly.

    Sinn began gracefully attacking him with her chain whipping it at him.  He took a few hits, and barely dodge the rest.  Sinn swung again and he allowed it to wrap around his arm.  Then using all his force he pulled the chain and sent Sinn flying towards the wall.  

    “SINN!” Hyoyeon yelled in horror.  

    Lay quickly got up with blurry vision, but ran to catch Sinn just in the nick of time taking most of the blow.  “!”

    “Lay…” Sinn shouted softly.

    The rest of the gang came running towards them ready to beat the guy to a pulp.

    “HAHAHAHAHA!  I TUXEDO AM INVINCI-” His speech was cut short as he began shaking from electricity surging through his body.  He fell and Lihua stood behind him. She manage to sneak up behind him and tased him with her pink bunny-cupcake taser.  

    She held up a peace sign and smiled cutely, “Mission Complete!”

Tuxedo woke up with a slap to the face from Sinn.  He groaned, “Where am I…,” he was tied down to a chair.

“A janitor closet.” Amber answered with dark eyes and her arms crossed.  She and Maki had bandages wrapped all around them like mummies, “Let’s see the identity of Tuxedo shall we?”

Hyoyeon got up and ripped his mask off and they all dropped their jaw.

“WANG JACKSON!”

“Hey guys!  It was all just a joke, so if you could untie me, I promise not to do it again.”  He said with a cheeky face.

“Oh, you won’t…” Hyoyeon grinned mischievously.

“W-what are you going do to me?”  He asked as the girls began walking out.  

    Hyoyeon turned around to him and smiled, “We aren’t going to do anything,” then a bunch of girls that he stole from started entering the room with bats, steel pipes, chains, and other kind of weapons, “It’s what they are going to do to you.”

    The last girl to enter was a girl he knew very well, “H-hey Youngji, my best friend in the world!  Wanna let me go?” he begged.

    She just smiled placing brass knuckles on each of her hands, “Don’t worry Jackson, this is going to hurt a lot.” and the door slowly shut as he screamed.

    “, I’m tired.”  Chanyeol groaned.

    Chen shook his head, “I still can’t believe we missed him.”

    “God we’re dumb!”  Baekhyun laugh as the other two joined.

    “I’m sorry I messed up the oil plan…” Lihua apologized.

    Suho chuckled, “It’s fine, you didn’t hurt anyone.”

    “Except for Jackson!  Good job by the way!”  D.O. gave a thumbs up.

    “Yeah, you saved the day!”  Xiumin beamed giving her a high five.

    Luhan patted her on the head looking down at her with a smile, “You did good Lihua.”

    “Amber, can we go in there and harpoon him?”  Maki whined.

    “No, Maki we can’t.  But next time definitely.”  Amber answered and they both fist pumped the air with their mummified hands.

    Lay was sitting on the window sill slouching over.  Sinn went over to him placing a heat pack on his back.  “You okay?” she asked with a gentle voice.

    “Yeah, what about you?” he asked back.

    “Well,” she smiled, “you know all this could have been avoided if you let me use my gun.”

    Lay groaned into his hands, “No, Sinn.”

    “But-” Lay placed a finger to her lips shushing her, as she pouted.

Hyoyeon slowly walked over to Kai who was leaning against the wall with his eyes shut, “Hey...you okay?”

“Tsk.  A few bruises won’t kill me.” Kai retorted back.

“Even the one down there?” she raised an eyebrow and he knew exactly what she was referring too.

“My balls are made of steel.”

“Wow, gross, every girl wants that.” Hyoyeon gave a disgusted look.

“You’re right.  Every girl does want me,” Kai glanced down at her and eyed her wrapped wrist from the metal chafing against her wrist, “How’s your wrist?”

Hyoyeon held her wrist to her chest, “It’s fine…”

“It amazes me how you did nothing, but get in the way tonight.”  Kai scoffed.

“Excuse you?” Hyoyeon eyes narrowed.

“Like , you were more of a burden than anything.”

“I’m sorry that I practically got KIDNAPPED!”  She shouted and everyone turned to look at the two.

“You should be sorry!  A sack of potatoes would have been more useful than you!” Kai shouted back.

“Listen here you egotistical bast-” Hyoyeon stopped mid-sentence with a finger jabbing Kai in the chest.

“You guys!  Is everyone okay?” Tao asked running up with Sehun.

Everyone couldn’t help but stare at the two.  They had bruises on them with drag make-up plastered on their faces, shirtless with only their boxers on and pink tutus, their nails were painted, they were decked out in plastic jewelry, and “I like boys,” written on their chests.

Chen gave a slow clap nodding his head, “Wow.  I’ve never met finer es than you two.”  Everyone busted out laughing at the comment and how ridiculous the two looked.

Tao stomped his foot, “HEY!”

“CAN IT YOU !” Sehun spat back to Chen.

Hyoyeon shook her head while laughing, “Yes, Tao.  We are all okay.”

Holy crap that was a long chapter, hopefully that makes up for me going MIA??  Anyways there was a tiny little bit of Hyokai in this!  And K and M getting along!  Also I think I'm going to do SinnxLay, LihuaxLuhan, and maybe AmberxMaki?  Not sure yet lol. Thanks for the positive comments you guys are awesome!  P.S. I also really love Jackson so I hope I didn't offend anyone for making him the villain!