Hoseok awoke a few hours later from the nap with Taehyung’s hand still held tightly in his. He carefully loosened their grip and gently stood up from the bed without jostling Taehyung. He pulled his phone from his backpack and saw that visiting hours were nearly over. Taehyung was still deep asleep and Hoseok wasn’t going to bother waking him. Taehyung needed as much sleep as he could get in order to regain his strength. 

With that in thought, he reached down and adjusted the beanie on his head that had slipped down. He swept a gentle hand across his cheek in a loving manner before pulling the blankets to keep him warmer. Once he deemed Taehyung was comfortable enough he grabbed his backpack and left. 

On the bus ride home he felt his mind whirring and going a thousand miles per hour. He decided to call the only person that could put his mind at ease and help him out with the plan that was slowly forming in his swirling thoughts.

“Hello? How are you doing Hoseok-ah?”

Yoongi’s deep voice rang through the speaker of his phone after a few rings. Hoseok figured it was safe to call him since he was already out of work. 

“Hyung, I need help finding a recorder please. I need to buy one right away.” 

“A recorder? May I ask what for Hoseok?” Hoseok could clearly hear the curiosity coming from Yoongi’s voice.

“Its for something special. Its for Taehyung.”

A deep chuckle could be heard after Hoseok had uttered the name Taehyung, “Ill get you one man, but I need to meet Taehyung. Ive heard a ton of things about him, but Ive never met the kid. Doesn’t seem very fair Hobi.” 

This time it was Hosoek’s turn to let out an embarrassed chuckle, “A lot of stuff has been going on hyung. You never have time.” 

Hoseok hadn’t meant for that single comment to sound so somber. He instantly regretted it when the heard the brief silence coming from the other end.

“Hoseok-ah, Im sorry for not properly being there for you. I asked for a week off next week so we can hang out. Im here for you man.”

Listening to Yoongi express this brought a smile to his face, “Hyung you know that’s not true. You were there for the funeral and I couldn’t ask for more. I can’t wait to catch up. I've really missed you hyung.” 

Yoongi was quick to respond, “Alright Hoseok-ah. My mom has an old recorder she doesn’t use anymore. If you show up to school tomorrow Ill give it to you then.” 

“Thats perfect hyung! See you then.” 

By the time Hoseok had finished his phone call with Yoongi, he had already made it to his bus stop. He checked the time and he knew he had a few hours before his dad would come home from either work or the bar. The apartment had become quite messy because Hoseok hadn’t even bothered to attempt cleaning it. He had let himself succumb to his inner turmoil and let himself grief. Taehyung’s visit had finally convinced him that he needed to change things. He would clean the apartment to give his dad somewhere comforting to come home to and finally speak to him. He needed his father back. 

Hoseok spent the rest of the evening leaving the apartment spotless. Around midnight he finally put his dust rag away and sat down for a quick break. His dad wasn’t home yet, but these days he usually wasn’t at this hour. He sat on the couch in a trance just waiting for the messy jingling of the doorknob that signified the arrival of his wasted father. This time around he didn’t have to wait long because he heard the familiar rattling and his father emerged at the doorway stumbling about. Hoseok quickly stood and simply stared at his father as he watched him slam the door shut and messily turn around. His father was about to take a step forward until he noticed his presence. They stood there in silence making eye contact in the dim living room until his father was the one to break the silence in a wavering voice, “Hoseok-ah.” 

Listening to his dad’s emotion filled voice sprung Hoseok into action and with long strides he reached him and managed to pull him into a hug. His dad let out a chocking sob and with alcohol induced limbs he gripped Hoseok harshly by the arms. Hoseok mustered up all the strength he had and half carried his father’s limp body onto the coach where he let his father weep bitterly into his shoulder almost in a childlike state. Hoseok wanted badly to let the tears he felt building up loose as he watched his crumbling father in his arms, but he needed to be strong. He whispered comforting words for what felt like hours until his father had finally controlled his sobs. 

They sat in silence for a little while with his father’s sniffling being heard here and there until Hoseok decided to finally get his thoughts across, “Dad this needs to stop.” he made sure to make eye contact with his dad when he said this to make him understand. His father stayed quiet and stared at him giving Hoseok the courage to keep going, “Hyeri is gone but there is nothing we can do about it now. She wouldn’t want you to be like this trying to drink your sorrows away. She would want us to be happy dad. I know this has been hard on you after all you worked so hard day and night to pay for the best medical care for Hyeri, but at the end it didn’t work. Dad…” Hoseok felt his voice crack at what he was about to vent about next, but he somehow continued, “Im hurting too you know. I was there at the hospital with Hyeri the whole time while you were at work all the time. I watched her slowly whither away into nothing and there was nothing I could do about it.”

Hoseok took a breath and brought up a hand to wipe at the tears that had begun to drip down his cheeks. He glanced down at his father to see him crying as well but he had his undivided attention, “You know what she said to me dad as she lay there dying. She told me she was super thankful for what we did for her. She especially told me to tell you that she loved you. She wouldn’t want us to be sad dad. I want to be happy again dad.” 

This time Hoseok couldn’t control himself and he let the tears cascade down. He sat there crying but this time his dad was the one who pulled him into his arms and with soothing hands he gently patted his head in a calming manner, “Im so sorry Hoseok-ah. I promise all of this will change and we will be happy again for your sister okay. Im sorry for leaving you all alone. I will be a better father for you son.” This had been exactly what Hoseok had wanted to hear and he couldn’t help the sobs that ripped through his chest at the relief of knowing that his father was somewhat back. 

The following morning they both awoke at the couch not having moved after being so exhausted from all the crying. They both got ready for work and school respectively and they sat together for breakfast finishing off their conversation from yesterday. Promises were made and Hoseok hadn’t felt this happy in a long time. His dad saw him off to school and Hoseok couldn’t wait to find Yoongi to tell him the good news. He managed to find Yoongi sitting in the bench just outside of the cafeteria doors that had become their usual meeting spot. 

“Hoseok-ah long time no see!” Yoongi greeted him as he smacked his shoulder in greeting. 

“Hyung it hasn’t been that long but its good to see you too.” Yoongi had always had really milky pale skin and had been more on the thin side and Hoseok could see the stress of his work made his eye bags more prominent and his wrists looked thinner. Hoseok had been so caught up with himself that he had neglected to see the weakened state of his best friend. He would definitely make it up to him. 

While he had been in his own musings, Hoseok hadn’t noticed Yoongi pulling something out of his backpack, and he nearly jumped back in surprise when his hung it into his face, “Here Hoseok-ah I was able to get the recorder for you. I replaced the batteries and everything now you can take me to see Taehyung.” Yoongi put the recorder in Hoseok’s hands and he couldn’t stop thanking him. Hoseok almost wished it was already the end of school but a warning bell reminded him that he needed to head to class. He bade Yoongi goodbye and carefully slipped the recorder into his pocket. The weight of the little machine was a constant reminder throughout the day of the person who he longed to see the most.

[A/N]

Hey guys! Oh my gosh I am so sorry for being gone so long. School and work really kicked my and I found myself not being able to sit and write. I should have more time now but I can't promise consistent updates so please bare with me. I just want to say hello to all the new subscribers and thank you to the ones who have stuck along and commented. I truly appreciate it. 

The story is moving along and perhaps a more upfront confession? Lol well we will see.

See you guys soon!