C H A P T E R F O U R T E E N
If I clash against the waves and stop
Will my heart reach you?

The day of the JYP dinner quickly arrived. The air inside the company was alive with excitement, buzzing with the squeals and whispers of trainees as each hour ticked by. Nerves were high, hands were shaking, but on the whole the vibe was one of pride; they were showcasing their talents. To show that this was what JYP trainees could do, what they were capable of. And they were going to kill.

"!"

Mark jumped at the sharp curse that flew out of his friends mouth, as he kicked the chair he had been sitting on across the practice room floor. His knuckles were turning white as they gripped his phone tightly, and he had to cover his face with his hand, taking slow, deep breaths, in, hold, out, relax.

"Jackson..."

"She's not picking up her ing phone! She wasn't at her dorm when I went looking for her!" He groaned in exasperation and fell heavily onto his heels, squatting with his head in his hands. "I bet she ing found out. I knew it, I should have just told her."

The two boys were backstage, make up and clothes done. All they had to do was wait anxiously for their turn, and pray to every God they knew - because Sumin was no where in sight.

The JYP dinner had already started, located in a concert hall separate from the company. She had missed the opening speech, missed other trainee performances, missed introductions to members of the industry she would have benefitted from knowing. Currently, they could hear Seo Minji's voice quietly echoing through the corridor, a cover of AOA - Confused with a few other girls. It did nothing to calm their nerves - if anything, the quality of the performance was putting them on edge.

Mark frowned at Jackson, still a little confused by the whole thing. Sure, he was amicable enough with the blonde girl - they danced together, tricked, but he was pretty sure they were just casual friends. He had thought the same went for Jackson, to some extent. At least, he hadn't expected him to get so freaked out by Sumin ignoring his calls and texts for a few days.

She hadn't turned up to practice. But she'd texted, saying she suddenly didn't feel well and was going to rest.

And then nothing.

"Oh man, I bet she hates me."

"Dude, you hate each other. I thought that was the thing you had," he furrowed his brows.

Jackson seemed to disagree, with the look he was shooting his best friend. "I don't hate her."

It took a few moments of silence for the sentence to settle in Mark's head, and after it did he raised both of his eyebrows.

Jackson could only sigh heavily, falling back to sit on the floor, kicking out his feet as he stared at the phone in his hands. "Look, we piss each other off, we tease each other, but it's all harmless. Come on - if we really hated each other, do you think I would even be alive right now? Just think of all the times I've made comments to her, and then think of that one dude years ago who touched her . I would be him, but probably still in hospital."

That caused his friend to snort with laughter at the image of the tiny Sumin beating him up, but as he recalled the event he mentioned, it faded out, his face paling as he realised; yeah. It was probably true.

"Though it doesn't look like it, we're friends. I think we both understand that, though we've never explicitly said it." Jackson frowned to himself, finding the blonde's contact on his phone again as he pressed the call button, holding it to his ear. "And I don't really know, but debut is not something you would really keep from a friend. Not in this place. It's like betrayal, almost."

As the phone rang quietly, Mark let his words sink in, sitting back in the chair. It was true. To find out someone you were close with, someone you had been training with for years was about to achieve the dream that you yourself wanted, that everyone else wanted... it was almost bad manners to debut quietly. And as Jackson cursed again and dropped his phone on the floor, Mark was hit with his own surge of guilt for not letting the blonde know.

"We are in deep if she doesn't turn up. We go on stage next. As much as I feel like a , the entire company and more are out there, and it's gonna look hella bad for our debut."

Jackson was right. He could only hope that the blonde would forgive them in time.

However, time was running short. With every lyric they heard Minji and her minions sing, precious seconds were passing. Before long, a runner had peeked his head behind the door and motioned for them to follow him to the stage. Less than a minute was left. There was the last chorus. They were standing nervously to the side, ready to go on, watching as the three girls on stage sang the last line and fell into their finishing positions. And it was over.

The cheering and thank yous and bowing blurred together and Jackson felt his hands shake at his sides. He was placing all his hope onto the blonde girl right now. Nothing was in his head except Sumin, willing her face to appear by their sides with a cheeky grin and start laughing at their fac